bone app the teeth

recipes and cooking tips collected by teo

[the-messhall]

Steak With Citrus Chimichurri Sauce — 🍊

[passumbapper]

it's almost summer do you guys want my stupid hyperoptimized lemonade recipe that takes half a day to make and whips absolute ass

[passumbapper]

Fruited Lemonade That Makes You Reconsider It All

ingredience:

lemons/limes (this needs to make up the bulk of the fruit being used, like at least 80%)

whatever other fruits or fruit scraps you want, plus any herbs/other flavorings you want to try. by fruit scraps I mean things like cherry pits, apple peels, pineapple cores, strawberry ends, things like that.

granulated white sugar, the coarser the better, 50% by weight of total citrus rinds + 100% by weight of any additional fruit. you'll measure this after you prep the fruit.

water as needed

equipment:

a few nonmetallic mixing bowls

a mesh strainer

a chinoise, ricer or some cheesecloth

a kitchen scale

a citrus juicer or reamer (manual or electric)

a potato masher

juice the citrus through a strainer - saving all rinds -  and refrigerate the juice for the time being. dice the rinds and other fruits if any, keeping the rinds separate. make note of weights, and measure your sugar.

 Place sugar in a large nonmetallic bowl. If using non-citrus fruits and/or any other flavorings, mix them in with the sugar and mash with potato masher. add diced citrus rinds, mix thoroughly, and mash again. cover and let stand at room temperature for at least 4 hours. this allows the sugar to draw out flavors that would otherwise get discarded with the rinds, and the rinds' acids should be enough to dissolve the sugar into a syrup.

Afterward, mash one last time, then collect the syrup by pressing the macerated mixture through a strainer/chinoise or ricer, or squeeze it through cheesecloth. if you want, this can be saved as a standalone syrup at this point, for use in cocktails or desserts. if not, slowly pour the reserved juice through the solids to to help get the remaining syrup out, and squeeze/press again. do the same thing one more time with warm water (roughly the same amount of water as juice). discard solids (or try making sangria with them!).

taste the mixture and add more water if necessary. a stronger mix is totally fine if you anticipate serving over ice on a hot day, or adding booze, or if there was a lot of non-sour fruit. keep in mind that it will taste a bit less sweet once it's chilled. pour into a pitcher and refrigerate.

citrus oils will float to the top, so stir/shake before serving. love you. enjoy.

some tried and true flavor combos:

straight lemon or lime, or any combination of the two, is of course an untouchable classic

lemon & strawberries (that's pussy babe!)

lemon & orange with a hint of vanilla (creamsiclemonade...?)

lemon & apples or apple peels with cinnamon/ginger/allspice (for late summer)

some cocktail type combos, booze optional:

lemon or lime & berries with basil + gin

lime & mint + white rum

lime & ginger + dark rum

lime & cucumber + gin

lime & orange (berries optional) + tequila

lemon, orange & cherry + brandy, bourbon, or rye whiskey

[madgastronomer]

holy gods

[prokopetz]

"I can never get it tasting like my mom used to make" yeah, because your mom had a giant Costco-size bottle of a specific pre-mixed spice blend that was discontinued by its manufacturer in 1998 and spent your entire childhood putting it in every meal to use the stupid thing up faster – she doesn't know how to replicate it any more than you do.

[prokopetz]

The tragedy of culinary nostalgia is that most of the time, the flavours of your childhood aren't memories of lost secret recipes – they're the irreplicable accidents of folks tossing whatever happened to be cheap and available into the pot, and there are no recipes to recover because the people doing the cooking never knew them.

[batbetbitbotbut]

I am reminded of this reddit post and update, from a person seeking to recreate a dish their mum used to make based on not much more than "chicken, peaches, and it was beige".

I am a pretty competent cook, so don't worry about that bit. I just want to know if this dish sounds familiar, so someone can fill me in on the parts I don't remember. It's a chicken dish made with flat chicken cutlets. I think she used to hammer them a bit with a kitchen mallet, dredge them in flour, and pan fry them in a little butter so they would brown nicely. The sauce is the part I am a little lost about. She used white wine (probably chardonnay) and sour cream, that part I am sure of. There were canned peaches too, which were slightly browned and served on top. I'm sure there was something more to it than that, any thoughts? The flavor was tangy, not particularly sweet except for the peaches, and the sauce was opaque and kind of a beige color. Does this sound like a dish you are aware of? While her food was great, her dishes were usually pretty simple. It is likely that this is not something she invented herself, but it might be something that she simplified. Does anyone know what this is or what it is called so I can look it up and try and get it right? She used to serve it with grilled zucchini brushed with garlic butter. Thank you. Edit -- I am blown away with how helpful and kind you all have been. I have taken little hints from each of your posts and a lot of them have jogged my memory. I think some sort of composite from these suggestions will produce something close. I am going to try to make it when I have the chance, and I will update when I do. Thank you, reddit. <3

Update 6 days later:

My mom passed away a few years ago. I needed help trying to recreate a chicken recipe of hers that I have been craving, because I could only remember a few ingredients. You amazing people of r/recipes came through and gave me so many wonderful suggestions. With a mix of all your advice, I made it tonight. I was nervous as I was putting it together. I felt like there had to be something more to it, but I went with using just the ingredients I knew (as suggested by Ethril). I felt like there was something I was forgetting. Something about brown specks in the sauce. I went with it anyway, and figured I would know what to add at the end by taste. I took chicken cutlets and hammered them flat. Dredged in flour and sauteed in butter (high heat). I burned the butter a little. I remembered my mom saying that butter is the one thing that is ok to burn (as long as it is not smoking furiously) so I left it alone, and smiled at the memory. I was pleased to see the chicken brown to the color I remember. When I flipped the chicken I added the zucchini spears and browned those too. When the chicken was done (just a couple minutes) I set it aside and covered it in tinfoil to keep it warm, then turned the zucchini and browned the peaches in the same pan. It only took a few minutes to brown everything and when the zucchini and peaches were done I put them aside with the chicken. I deglazed the empty pan with chardonnay. My mom wasn't a big wine person, so I went with the cheapest they had. I suddenly remembered that sound the wine would make when it hit the hot pan, a huge hiss. Mom used to tell me to step back before she poured it in, because it would splash a little. I felt like I was nine years old again. I added three big dollops of sour cream and dissolved it in the hot wine. I didn't know what I was going to do next, this was all I had planned. Then I saw the little brown flecks come up. It was that burned butter! I just about cried. I tasted it, and suddenly in my mind I was standing in her kitchen as a kid watching her cook. This was it. It was that simple. I added a couple spoonfuls of the liquid from the canned peaches to take away a little of the wine's tartness, and the sauce was perfect. Just like she used to make. Keep in mind that I am no food stylist, but I assure you that this tasted 10x better than it looks: http://i.imgur.com/Qgk6u.jpg The whole thing took less than 20 minutes to make. And I fucking nailed it. Thank you so, so much reddit! You brought me back, and I love you. The smell is still lingering in the house.

[dreamingmappist]

If you like this kind of thing, I recommend reading The Kamogawa Food Detectives and sequel by Hisashi Kashiwai.

There’s also a Japanese show based on the books called Kamogawa Shokudo and the first episode about recreating the mom’s recipe is my fave and the reason I started a recipe notebook.

[gogogoat495]

[ID: Photo of chicken glazed in a beige sauce topped with peaches and served with grilled zucchini. /End ID]

[only-tiktoks]

[fieldbears]

Sharing the secrets of your hearth with strangers who will never be able to meet or thank you. Honoring the dead through learning their traditions of the home; emulation and exaltation. A good carrot cake.

[harcodia]

Screenshots for those who want to try to make the recipes. One was completely blocked by text but I thought maybe someone would like to make them ♡

Someone with better typing skills if ya wanna type em up….. ♡

[trainsofthought]

I looked up the obscured grave with the blueberry pie recipe:

From Margaret Davis

GLAZED BLUEBERRY PIE

- Soften a 3 oz. pkg. cream cheese.

- Spread in bottom of cooled, cooked pastry shell.

- Fill shell with 3 cups of blueberries.

- To an additional 1 cup of blueberries add 1 cup of water.

- Bring just to boiling.

- Simmer 2 min.

- Strain reserving juice, about ½ cup.

- Combine ¾ cup sugar, and 2 tablespoons corn starch.

- Gradually add reserved juice.

- Cook, stirring constantly until thick and clear.

- Cool slightly and add:

- 2 tablespoons lemon juice

- Pour over berries in pastry shell and chill.

the others are:

From Kathryn Andrews

KAY’S FUDGE

- 2 SQ. chocolate

- 2 TBS. butter

- Melt on low heat

- Stir in 1 cup milk

- Bring to boil

- 3 cups sugar

- 1 TSP. vanilla

- Pinch of salt

- Cook to softball stage

- Pour on marble slab

- Cool & Beat & Eat

From Naomi Odessa Miller-Dawson

SPRITZ COOKIES

- 1 cup of butter ormargarine

- ¾ cup sugar

- 1 teaspoon vanilla

- 1 egg

- 2 ¼ cups of flour

- ½ teaspoon baking powder.

- ⅛ teaspoon salt

From Constance Galberd

CONNIE’S DATE & NUT BREAD

100% Good Stuff - 0% Bad Stuff

Ingredients:

- 8 oz. dates cut into small pieces

- 1 cup raisins

- 2 cups boiling water

- 2 tsp. baking soda

- 1 ½ cups sugar

- 2 eggs, well beaten

- 4 cups flour

- 2 tsp. baking powder

- ½ cup chopped nuts

Directions:

- Pour boiling water (where 2 tsp. of baking soda have been dissolved) over dates and raisins. Cool.

- Add 1 ½ C. sugar and mix well.

- Add 2 eggs, well beaten.

- Gradually mix in 4 C. of flour and 2 tsp. of baking powder. Beat thoroughly.

- Add ½ C. of chopped nuts. Beat thoroughly.

- Bake at 350 for ¾ - 1 hr.

Bake in tin cans.

One batch = 13 small cans

From Christine Hammills

A GOOD CARROT CAKE

CARROT CAKE

Ingredients:

- 2 cups flour

- 4 eggs

- 2 tsp. baking powder

- 2 cups sugar

- 1 ½ tsp. soda

- 1 ½ cups oil

- 1 tsp. salt

- 2 cups grated carrots

- 2 tsp. cinnamon

- 1 (8 ½ oz.) crushed pineapple, drained

- ⅔ cup chopped nuts

Directions:

- Sift together flour, baking powder, soda salt, and cinnamon.

- Beat eggs and add sugar.

-Let stand 10 mins.

-Mix in oil, pineapple, carrots, nuts, flour mixture.

-Turn into 3 greased and floured 9-inch round cake pans.

-Bake at 350’ for 35 – 40 min.

-Cool in pans for 10 min, remove to wire racks, and cool well.

VANILLA CREAM CHEESE FROSTING

Ingredients:

- ½ cup butter

- 1 (8 oz.) cream cheese

- 1 tsp. vanilla

- 1 pound powdered sugar, sifted

Directions:

- Mix butter, cream cheese, vanilla then add sugar. First between layers, top and sides.

From Annabell Gunderson

ANNABELL’S SNICKERDOODLES

Mix Thoroughly:

- 1 c shortening

- 1 c margarine

- 3 c sugar

- 4 eggs

Sift Together And Stir In:

- 5 ½ c flour

- 4 tsp cream of tartar

- 2 tsp soda

- ½ tsp salt

Directions:

- Roll (softly) into balls the size of small walnuts.

- Roll in mixture of 6 tsp sugar and 6 tsp cinnamon.

- Place 2" apart on ungreased cookie sheet.

- Bake at 375 F for 8-10 minutes or 400 F for 6-8 until lightly brown, but still soft.

Secret is: Keep dough fluffy!

[jeanjauthor]

Humans have been eating meals in honor of the memory of our lost loved ones for as long as humans have been human…and probably even proto-human.

[passumbapper]

it's almost summer do you guys want my stupid hyperoptimized lemonade recipe that takes half a day to make and whips absolute ass

[passumbapper]

Fruited Lemonade That Makes You Reconsider It All

ingredience:

lemons/limes (this needs to make up the bulk of the fruit being used, like at least 80%)

whatever other fruits or fruit scraps you want, plus any herbs/other flavorings you want to try. by fruit scraps I mean things like cherry pits, apple peels, pineapple cores, strawberry ends, things like that.

granulated white sugar, the coarser the better, 50% by weight of total citrus rinds + 100% by weight of any additional fruit. you'll measure this after you prep the fruit.

water as needed

equipment:

a few nonmetallic mixing bowls

a mesh strainer

a chinoise, ricer or some cheesecloth

a kitchen scale

a citrus juicer or reamer (manual or electric)

a potato masher

juice the citrus through a strainer - saving all rinds -  and refrigerate the juice for the time being. dice the rinds and other fruits if any, keeping the rinds separate. make note of weights, and measure your sugar.

 Place sugar in a large nonmetallic bowl. If using non-citrus fruits and/or any other flavorings, mix them in with the sugar and mash with potato masher. add diced citrus rinds, mix thoroughly, and mash again. cover and let stand at room temperature for at least 4 hours. this allows the sugar to draw out flavors that would otherwise get discarded with the rinds, and the rinds' acids should be enough to dissolve the sugar into a syrup.

Afterward, mash one last time, then collect the syrup by pressing the macerated mixture through a strainer/chinoise or ricer, or squeeze it through cheesecloth. if you want, this can be saved as a standalone syrup at this point, for use in cocktails or desserts. if not, slowly pour the reserved juice through the solids to to help get the remaining syrup out, and squeeze/press again. do the same thing one more time with warm water (roughly the same amount of water as juice). discard solids (or try making sangria with them!).

taste the mixture and add more water if necessary. a stronger mix is totally fine if you anticipate serving over ice on a hot day, or adding booze, or if there was a lot of non-sour fruit. keep in mind that it will taste a bit less sweet once it's chilled. pour into a pitcher and refrigerate.

citrus oils will float to the top, so stir/shake before serving. love you. enjoy.

some tried and true flavor combos:

straight lemon or lime, or any combination of the two, is of course an untouchable classic

lemon & strawberries (that's pussy babe!)

lemon & orange with a hint of vanilla (creamsiclemonade...?)

lemon & apples or apple peels with cinnamon/ginger/allspice (for late summer)

some cocktail type combos, booze optional:

lemon or lime & berries with basil + gin

lime & mint + white rum

lime & ginger + dark rum

lime & cucumber + gin

lime & orange (berries optional) + tequila

lemon, orange & cherry + brandy, bourbon, or rye whiskey

[madgastronomer]

holy gods

[alitonembroidery]

[bogleech]

My cookies look like wobbegongs

[bogleech]

As I suspected at first sight, these are to me the best cookies that I've ever had. Once cooled a little they scrape off in one gooey mass with the crispy, chewy caramelized fringe intact.

WOBBEGONG COOKIES:

-1 cup each brown sugar and white sugar

-2 cups all purpose flour

-1 tsp each of baking powder and salt

-semisweet chocolate chips

-1 egg

-1 cup completely hot melted liquid butter

-mix all the sugars and flour together first

-then mix it into the butter

-then mix an egg into the dough.

-then the chips

Bake 11 minutes at 350f directly on an ungreased metal pan, no tinfoil, when I tried again with tinfoil they did NOT get the delicious frill:

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[hellsquills]

at some point in your life you will be making soup. and you'll have to add the noodles to the broth. and you'll think "these aren't enough noodles for this much broth". this is the devil speaking. no matter how thin the noodles are, you will put too many and they will soak up so much liquid that you'll end up with a soggy block of noodles.

[squeakitties]

pic i made earlier today while Mad but i quit my last job cuz every single day felt like this

[hungwy]

Cop just walked into this Chinese place and was like im here for pickup and pointed to the "we exercise the fourth amendment" sign and said "these losers [ICE] bother you at all?" like even the cops are bothered with them

[professor-scaly]

Extremely funny post but even more relevant tags (via @egberts)

[squimp]

im telling you all... its so worth it to spend a whole evening make 100 million homemade gyoza (even though it takes so long) and freezing them all to have perfect delicious gyoza just the way you like them anytime you want at a moments notice. they seriously take like 10 minutes to prepare from frozen and they are so good. i just had a dumplings and noodles feast you wish you were me

[squimp]

heres teh gyoza recipe ive been using and heres the dumpling sauce recipe ive been using and here was the noodles recipe i ate. in case even 1 person on earth wanted this information

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[busket]

i made yellow curry for dinner last night and prepped the leftovers to take to lunch for work with my NEW THERMOS and it worked perfectly and I'm a genius. Just checking in thanks

[busket]

all these measurements are very loose since I estimate them each time, so you'll have to make adjustments to the seasoning as you go, BUT

1-2 tbsp coconut oil

1 onion, chopped

a couple cloves of garlic, minced

3-4 carrots, chopped

3-4 sticks of celery, chopped

4 med/large gold potatoes chopped

2 chicken breasts cut into cubes

2-3 tbsp yellow curry paste (I use Mae Ploy)

1-2 tbsp turmeric powder

1 tbsp lemongrass puree

1 tbsp ginger puree

1 tbsp Thai fish sauce

1 tbps honey

2-3 cups chicken broth (enough to cover your veggies in the pot. I like making my own with better than bouillon paste)

1 can coconut milk

cooked jasmine rice

optional: green grapes, cherry tomatoes, fresh cilantro and soft boiled egg for garnish

melt coconut oil in a large pot. add onion, garlic and curry paste and cook for a few minutes. add chicken and cook until onions are transparent and chicken is basically fully cooked (any extra pink bits will be cooked in the curry so dont sweat it)

add carrots, potato, and celery. pour in the chicken stock, enough to cover all the chicken and veggies so they can boil. add turmeric, ginger, lemongrass, fish sauce, and honey and stir. bring to a boil then reduce heat to med/low and allow to simmer for about 10 minutes until the veggies are tender, stirring occasionally

taste for seasoning. honey will cut spice and salt, fish sauce adds some good depth and umami, and you can also add more curry paste if its not spicy or strong enough, or anything else you think it needs. once youre satisfied with the flavor, add the coconut milk and cook for just a few more minutes. dont boil it with the coconut milk cos it can separate.

serve with jasmine rice! I always like it with a soft boiled egg, raw cherry tomatoes and cold green grapes. the grapes may sound crazy but the cold sweet crunch is amazing with the soft, spicy heat of the curry! and if you dont like cilantro, use Thai basil instead :)

I also make my own Thai tea at home in big 64oz batches lmfao you can scale it down if you dont want that much (I always do):

11 tea bags of Thai tea (idk the loose leaf equivalent, theres a brand i always buy cos it tastes great and it's sold in tea bags, its called ChaTraMue Brand?)

64 Oz water

1 cup sugar

half and half to taste

boil water in a pot and dissolve sugar in it. it might bubble up when you add the sugar so be careful !

remove from heat, add the tea bags and allow them to steep for whatever. usually I just leave it for a couple hours, until the tea is still hot but not dangerously hot and I can do the next step safely. I also like my tea really strong so I dont worry about it steeping for too long

fish out the tea bags and transfer to a carafe. refrigerate overnight

to serve, pour over ice and leave a few inches at the top of the glass, then add half and half. it looks really pretty like this but stir before you drink it !

[the-wanton-house-wife]

You’re welcome 🧄

[preserving-tiktok]

[gretchensinister]

From the bottom of my heart, baking is a lot more flexible than people talk about it on here.

Do not let random funny posts about baking vs. cooking intimidate you from trying a hobby that can be fun, practical, and community-reinforcing.

But to start you do need to be able to:

-identify ingredients accurately and NOT do substitutions as a beginner. Seriously don't. There are so many recipes out there, if you have special dietary needs start with a recipe that accommodates them. If you forgot to buy the right thing at the grocery store, STOP. You are not making that recipe until you buy the right thing.

IF your brain is the kind that goes "cake flour, all purpose flour, self rising flour, surely it's the same" this WILL be a problem.

-measure fairly accurately. You don't need to stress about "how level is level on my cup." And as a Yank I am doing this shit with cups and tablespoons and such, even though I have a cooking scale and could fuck with grams if I wanted to. People have been baking well LONG before digital scales were easily available.

BUT if you have a brain that will not hold information about how many cups of flour you've already put into the bowl, you will need to figure out a way to accommodate for that.

-be able to plan ahead/accept the laws of thermodynamics. A recipe's baking time, if it's a tested recipe from a trusted source, can vary by 10 minutes or so based on your particular oven. You need to be able to check and monitor your baking around this time. As a beginner, DO NOT try to speed up the baking time by increasing the temperature. That's how you get burnt edges with a raw middle. Also, your baked good is going to take as long as it takes to cool. You have to accept this and plan for it otherwise you'll try to frost a warm cake and the frosting will melt off and you will be upset.

Time blindness and difficulties in being confident you WILL do a specific thing in 45min to an hour (or more) are issues you will have to accommodate for.

-stay humble and develop skills in identifying good sources of information. What I mean is that people have been baking for thousands of years. There are so many experts that can tell you how to make substitutions. There are so many recipes that have been tested. You don't need to, and shouldn't, just randomly substitute pumpkin for carrots in a carrot cake or whatever. There is a recipe for pumpkin cake out there, I promise.

Anyway, I realize this may not sound like "baking being flexible" but these are my tips for beginners. You're not handling radioactive material in a lab. Do not be scared of baking. You're not on a TV show. Relax, don't skip steps, and don't randomly modify things until you've got a better sense of what modifications do.

[purplesaline]

Another thing beginners (who aren't up to/interested in doing a bunch of research first) should avoid is using a different pan than called for in the recipe!

The amount of available surface area and the thickness of the batter correlate hugely with baking time and even if baking time is adjusted for using a different pan can result in a vastly different texture in the finished product.

Luckily there are a lot of resources on the internet that can help you find the right substitute! Sometimes it's an easy swap and other times you may need to adjust your recipe to make the pan you have work. Here's one link that's got a lot of helpful info to get you started

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

everyone!!! i may be generally full of sadness! but!!!

look at my mfucking LOAF OF BREAD

I am writing the version of the resippy i used today since I make tiny adjustments each time, so hold your horses it's comin!

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

Equipment and Time Considerations

You will need a pullman's loaf pan, which is a bread pan with a lid. the reason just tinfoiling a regular cake loaf pan doesn't work is because a pullman's is also considerably deeper and longer that a regular loaf pan, it can fit about a store-sized loaf of bread. which. which it's where the sizing actually comes from, historically.

This is a sourdough recipe so you have to remember to keep your starter well fed AND that the proofing takes considerably longer than anything with instant yeast.

I've modified a bunch of timings throughout the recipe. While your average sourdough boule takes an overnight final proof (making it a 2-day loaf) and your average pullman's loaf recipe takes about an afternoon, this will take about a day's (little under 12 hours give or take) worth of time.

Also note that it is currently around 19C/66F so I've been using my lightly heated oven to keep the dough at decent proofing temps (idk like 70 to 85ish degrees fahrenheit? whatever the equivalent of a sunny window day is). You'll need to figure out your equivalent

Ingredients

Levain -50ish g active, full hydration starter -35g whole wheat flour -35g AP or bread flour -70g/mL water, lukewarm

Remaining Ingredients (Not doing an autolyse for this one) -500g/mL water, lukewarm -35g sugar -550g AP or bread flour -200g whole wheat flour -15-20g salt -65g butter or margarine, plus some reserved

Method

Prepare the levain by mixing all ingredients together in a glass jar (i reuse an old jam jar), covering top with cling wrap, and leaving somewhere warm-ish for about 4 hours. You'll know it's ready when it's doubled in size and has just begun to fall

If you're using a stand mixer, pour your active levain into it. (any other large bowl will do if you're doing hand mixing). Add the sugar and the water to the levain, mixing together.

Let sit for 15-20 min. (I do this to encourage a bit of rapid growth in the yeast, it ups the culture's concentration and takes a bit of the acrid sour out of the flavour profile)

mix in remainder of the ingredients, flours, salt, butter/margarine. If you're using a stand mixer, have it go for about 5 min on the lowest setting. I run mine longer, but I'm using my roommate's old model so the lowest setting is slower. If kneading by hand I would say about 10 minutes or so, and since this is a wet dough, the slap and fold method is probably the way to go.

transfer back to the bowl and cover with plastic wrap, place in a proofer/warm area.

Now it's time for initial proofing and series of stretch and folds. Wait a half hour, then do a stretch and fold. Repeat this cycle three times so you're stretching and folding a total of 3 times. (30min>S&F>30min>S&F>30min>S&F>30min)

Take your pullman's loaf pan and butter/margarine the bottom and sides

heavily flour a surface of choice. Scrape the dough out and let the dough rest on the counter for about 20 minutes

using a floured bench scraper,burrito fold the dough into a loaf shape (roll in sides first, then roll the long way) and transfer to the buttered loaf pan.

Let that rest in the pan for 10 minutes, then preheat the oven on bake at about 375F. The loaf should be out in the open with no lid for at least 20 minutes, otherwise it'll be too wet for the bread lame to score. (You also have the option of fridging the entire pan with a rice flour coated dish towel to get the same drying effect, but idk what the timeline'd look like for that)

lightly sprinkle some more flour onto the top of the loaf and score bread to your liking.

bake with the lid on for 40 minutes, then slide the lid off, raise temp to 425F and swap to broil setting (we want the heat coming from up top now) for about 15 minutes

cool bread off on rack and enjoy!!!!!!!

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

AH FUCK I RECORDED A DETAIL WRONG

it's 550g in AP flour not 450, I just edited it. the total flour to water volume is supposed to be 750:500 since it's a 3:2 ratio

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

baked this at a friends' board game night, have received at least one proposal of sorts upon the first cut/first bites of said bread

these are the sort of credentials I wish I could put on my culinary resume