Terry Pratchet @terrypratchet - Tumblr Blog

“You’d like Freedom, Truth, and Justice, wouldn’t you, Comrade Sergeant?” said Reg encouragingly. “I’d like a hard-boiled egg,” said Vimes, shaking the match out. There was some nervous laughter, but Reg looked offended. “In the circumstances, Sergeant, I think we should set our sights a little higher—” “Well, yes, we could,” said Vimes, coming down the steps. He glanced at the sheets of paper in front of Reg. The man cared. He really did. And he was serious. He really was. “But…well, Reg, tomorrow the sun will come up again, and I’m pretty sure that whatever happens we won’t have found Freedom, and there won’t be a whole lot of Justice, and I’m damn sure we won’t have found Truth. But it’s just possible that I might get a hard-boiled egg. ”

Night Watch Terry Pratchett

slightlyweemary

'In the beginning was the word,' said a dry voice right behind him.

'It was the Egg,' corrected another voice. 'I distinctly remember. The Great Egg of the Universe. Slightly rubbery.'

'You're both wrong, in fact. I'm sure it was the primordial slime.'

A voice by Rincewind's knee said: 'No, that came afterwards. There was firmament first. Lots of firmament. Rather sticky, like candyfloss. Very syrupy, in fact—.'

'In case anyone's interested,' said a crackly voice on Rincewind's left, 'you're all wrong. In the beginning was the Clearing of the Throat—'

'—then the word—'

'Pardon me, the slime—'

'Distinctly rubbery, I thought—'

There was a pause. Then a voice said carefully, 'Anyway, whatever it was, we remember it distinctly.'

'Quite so.'

'Exactly.'

The light fantastic ~ Terry Pratchett

espanolbot2

#HowDoTheyRiseUp #Glorious25thMay #Discworld

theeldritchbatreads

“Any other advice?” said Vimes, gloomily. “Just be yourself,” said Sweeper. “See it through. There’ll come a time when you’ll look back and see how it all made sense.” “Really?” “I wouldn’t lie. It’ll be a perfect moment. Believe me.” ... This was a perfect moment. Not even Reg, fussing around smoothing down earth and patting turf into place, could detract from it. There’ll come a time when it’ll all be clear, Sweeper had said. A perfect moment. The occupants of these graves had died for something. In the sunset glow, in the rising of the moon, in the taste of the cigar, in the warmth that comes from sheer exhaustion, Vimes saw it.

Night Watch - Terry Pratchett

currentquotes

“ Hard to explain to a kid like Sam why poncing a dollar when you got the chance was a bad thing to do.

‘Put it like this, lanceconstable,’ as they turned the corner. 'Would you let a murderer off for a thousand dollars?'

'No, sir!'

'A thousand dollars'd set your mum up in a nice place in a good part of town, though.'

'Knock it off, sarge, I'in not like that.'

'You were when you took that dollar. Everything else is just a haggling over the price.' ”

daily-crowley

Crowley Of The Day: do you ever miss it? What we used to have and know we’ll never have it again

selectivegeekwithstandards

Perfectly normal Night Watch quote for no reason

“For a moment, Vimes wondered, looking out through a gap in the furniture, if there wasn’t something in Fred’s idea about moving the barricades on and on, like a sort of sieve, street by street. You could let through the decent people, and push the bastards, the rich bullies, the wheelers and dealers in people’s fates, the leeches, the hangers-on, the brownnosers, and courtiers, and smarmy plump devils in expensive clothes, all those people who didn’t know or care about the machine but stole its grease, push them into a small and smaller compass and then leave them in there. Maybe you could toss some food in every couple of days, or maybe you could leave ’em to do what they’d always done, which was live off other people…”

pettiarts

It's the Glorious 25th of May. And while I don't have a Vimes drawing yet, I do have Time Monk Lu-Tze. Enjoy!

riteofashkente

The new sergeant-at-arms picked up his badge with care and saluted yet again. ‘Oath, sir,’ he said.

‘Oh, er, that thing? Er, I believe I’ve got it written down somewh—’

Vimes took a deep breath. This probably wasn’t a good idea, but he was flying now.

Night Watch by Terry Pratchett, pp. 115-116.

pratchettquotes

"Excuse me," said Big Mad Adrian, his voice cargoed with suspicion. "I don't want to cause any trouble, right, but is this Death or not? I've seen pictures, and they didn't look like her."

"We did the Rite stuff," said Ridcully. "And this is what we got."

[...] "She's just some girl messing about," said Skazz.

Susan stared at them.

"She hasn't even got a scythe," said Tez.

Susan concentrated. The scythe appeared in her hands, its blue-edged blade making a noise like a finger dragged around the rim of a glass.

The students straightened up.

"But I've always thought it was time for a change," said Tez.

"Right. It's about time girls got a chance in the professions," said Skazz.

"Don't you dare patronize me!"

"That's right," said Ponder. "There's no reason why Death has to be male. A woman could be almost as good as a man in the job."

"You're doing it very well," said Ridcully.

He gave Susan an encouraging smile.

She rounded on him. I'm Death, she thought -- technically, anyway -- and this is a fat old man who has no right to give me any kind of orders. I'll glare at him, and he'll soon realize the gravity of the situation. She glared.

"Young lady," said Ridcully. "Would you care for breakfast?"

Terry Pratchett, Soul Music

pratchettquotes

The wind howled. Lightning stabbed at the earth erratically, like an inefficient assassin. Thunder rolled back and forth across the dark, rain-lashed hills.

The night was as black as the inside of a cat. It was the kind of night, you could believe, on which gods moved men as though they were pawns on the chessboard of fate. In the middle of this elemental storm a fire gleamed among the dripping furze bushes like the madness in a weasel's eye. It illuminated three hunched figures. As the cauldron bubbled an eldritch voice shrieked: "When shall we three meet again?"

There was a pause.

Finally another voice said, in far more ordinary tones: "Well, I can do next Thursday."

Terry Pratchett, Wyrd Sisters

pratchettquotes

When he could speak to Vimes with nobody else listening, Moist said, "I know the rhythm of the train, but I'm no fighter, commander. Why choose me?"

"Because, Mister Lipwig, you'd pay a king's ransom in order to say that you fought on the roof of a train and I've seen you, you're a bastard in close combat, worse than Nobby and he tends to bite their knees. I saw the corpses of the grags from that incident at the Quirm railhead. You can fight, if only in terror, but it's true that the coward can often be the best fighter of all."

Terry Pratchett, Raising Steam