of doubtful authenticity

because i needed another outlet for procrastination ...oops my ao3

[moghedien]

I feel like I need to share this because idk if Europeans are familiar with the presence of Aldi in the US, but at least especially in my area they’ve been growing a lot recently. Like Aldi bought out some local failing grocery chains where I live (Louisiana) and have opened Aldis in all these somewhat rural communities and small towns, which for the record I’m fine with

But as a result of this they are advertising a lot more in my area and also in many cases, the people in these areas have never been confronted with Aldi or any European grocery store. So the ads that Aldi is pushing out to its new US customer base feature a cowboy shopping at Aldi who is explaining to new Aldi customers how Aldi works. Like this cowboy is explaining you gotta put a quarter in the shopping cart and why there are very little name brands. A cowboy is how they want to reach their American customer base. They gave us a cowboy

[moghedien]

Here he is, the Aldi Cowboy

[dominolemon]

Never forget to stretch before you do anything

[inkkstar-rambles]

Did another piece, this one's an old one I just redrew

[saintfelina]

[hexenmond]

Image description: a tweet by divinelydaria.

saw an inspiring video that said you need to have 4 hobbies.

create, consume, cavort, commune

create: bring something to life consume: appreciate the art of another cavort: move your body daily commune: have a community to socialize with

end image description.

[lierdumoa]

I think you need hobbies that do all four things but the number of hobbies needed to cover all these needs may vary. Some hobbies pull double/triple duty. Some hobbies can cause repetitive stress injuries so it's good to have a few different ones that fulfill the same need so you can rotate to get the fulfillment without the carpal tunnel.

[leebrontide]

Tumblr really is aging.

This is true tho.

[inthefallofasparrow]

Misread this as 'you need to have 4 hobbits'

[tanoraqui]

also true! there’s a really famous three-volume self-help guide about that!

unless all you’re doing is liberating a single mountain from a dragon, in which case you can probably get by with just one, so long as you also have a lot of dwarves.

[brothermouse-skeleton]

The exchange rate is three dwarves to one hobbit, if anyone was wondering

[hyde-the-toad-bard]

And I get 4 dwarves and a wizard left over let's fucking go!

[madgastronomer]

The Seven Hobbits of Highly Effective People

[liminalbeauty]

This went in directions unforetold.

[emmiegoesinsane]

[wildspringday]

rb with your major/degree, your sign and your favorite season

[aduckwithears]

"Well," said half the fandom, "that one went down like a lead balloon."

[toast-the-unknowing]

the bad news: I now hate my current wip and strongly believe there isn't a single joke in it that lands

the good news: I know my process enough to recognize this as the slump that I hit in everything I write when it's like three-quarters-ish done

the bad news: the only way out is through

the good news: I do know the way out!

the bad news: yeah but it's through

[toast-the-unknowing]

making a cross stitch that says "I am funny and he would fucking say that" to hang directly above my monitor

[toast-the-unknowing]

"hey toast you stayed up past midnight because you were working on the fic and not because you were procrastinating by making a hideous pattern for a joke cross stitch" have you never met a writer before

[toast-the-unknowing]

gonna tell my kids this was live laugh love

[the-apocrypha]

Happy Hob day! :D Hope he gets lots of Joy today!

(love your latest dreamling fic 💜)

Hob is probably bouncing off the walls with glee as we speak. A happy May the Fourth to all who celebrate, but most especially Hob. 😁

[the-apocrypha]

this is halloween Dream of the Endless/Hob Gadling || G || 17k || Complete

Alternate Universe - Royalty, Alternate Universe - Magic, Holidays as Kingdoms, Think Nightmare Before Christmas, Halloween Prince!Dream, Hob is a Holiday Too But It's a Surprise, Getting Back Together

You would think that his brother's coronation as King of Halloween would be the most important item on Dream's agenda for the day. You would be wrong.

The knock on the door signals seven o’clock sharp. Jessamy is never late. 

Dream has been awake since four. 

His infrared cooling mask has been tucked back into its drawer, and his stainless steel cryo roller has been returned to the freezer. There is a set of emergency under-eye patches in the bathroom trash bin, followed by a layer of dirtied makeup wipes, and then another set of under-eye patches. A massacre of makeup pots and hair styling products has been left on the bathroom counter. A hairdryer rests in the sink. A shoehorn and a garment brush lie atop the ruptured innards of a jewelry armoire. 

And so, when Dream swings the door to his room open, he at least does not look like he is about to face one of the most important days of his life on a scant three hours of sleep. 

“Good morning, your Highness,” says Jessamy. 

“Good morning,” says Dream. 

She eyes him over a portfolio heaped with an incongruous stack of neckties. “You’re… vibrating.” 

Dream might be. 

Read on AO3

[the-apocrypha]

this is halloween Dream of the Endless/Hob Gadling || G || 17k || Complete

Alternate Universe - Royalty, Alternate Universe - Magic, Holidays as Kingdoms, Think Nightmare Before Christmas, Halloween Prince!Dream, Hob is a Holiday Too But It's a Surprise, Getting Back Together

You would think that his brother's coronation as King of Halloween would be the most important item on Dream's agenda for the day. You would be wrong.

The knock on the door signals seven o’clock sharp. Jessamy is never late. 

Dream has been awake since four. 

His infrared cooling mask has been tucked back into its drawer, and his stainless steel cryo roller has been returned to the freezer. There is a set of emergency under-eye patches in the bathroom trash bin, followed by a layer of dirtied makeup wipes, and then another set of under-eye patches. A massacre of makeup pots and hair styling products has been left on the bathroom counter. A hairdryer rests in the sink. A shoehorn and a garment brush lie atop the ruptured innards of a jewelry armoire. 

And so, when Dream swings the door to his room open, he at least does not look like he is about to face one of the most important days of his life on a scant three hours of sleep. 

“Good morning, your Highness,” says Jessamy. 

“Good morning,” says Dream. 

She eyes him over a portfolio heaped with an incongruous stack of neckties. “You’re… vibrating.” 

Dream might be. 

Read on AO3

[the-zenith-calls]

My favorite scenes in the LotR books are the ones where Legolas has vital information and just decides it's not important to share.

Like when Gandalf spent literal PAGES trying to figure out why the vibes were off in Moria and Legolas chimes in with just "it's a balrog :) that shit's evil :) we're so fucked :)" like what do you MEAN you knew already and just didn't tell him??

Or at the beginning of Two Towers when Aragorn thinks there's something nearby so he puts his ear to the ground to listen, and then like 10 minutes later is like "hmmm i hear horses" and Legolas is just like "mm yep. there are 105 blond bitches with spears" like you just let your friend put his face in the dirt and you can SEE them??

Legolas please gain a sense of urgency

[knives-in-the-dishwater]

It's because legolas hasn't spent enough time with non-elves to remember that they don't know what he knows.

gandalf is scratching his head in moria, and legolas is thinking "oh man, the wizard noticed something off *besides* the obvious balrog that we all are aware of??"

"I wonder what aragorn is listening for? must be hard to hear, what with all of the horses. How many horses are there, actually? 1... 2... 3..."

[taavicleric]

"What do your elvish eyes see?" is Aragorn saying, as politely as possible, "Because the REST OF US are at a significant disadvantage, Prince Dipshit."

[thememedaddy]

[maikhiwi00]

sibling week day three: favorite brothers and sisters » the endless

[daturanerium]

times i cried during nasa artemis ii flyby stream:

dedication of the crater to carroll

the messy floating group hug after the dedication to carroll

the nutella flying by (it was a cry laugh but did make me emotional because it was just so human and ridiculous)

reid (?) saying hello to his kids and making heart hands and showing off his bracelet and mission control saying "copy heart, copy bracelet"

christina was talking about seeing the moon during her status report (?) and she said that she had a moment where she realized that it was a real place that actually exists and not just a poster, and that she imagined herself walking on the surface

again when victor's report said the same thing

"copy, full moon joy"

the announcement of beating the apollo record and the statements/speeches to follow, specifically when they said they wanted to inspire the next generation to beat their record soon

"we will continue our journey even further into space before Mother Earth succeeds in pulling us back to everything that we hold dear" ohhhh man

every time the crew gave an exciting detail in their reports and the science team at mission control nerded out. reminded me of those deep sea diving videos where marine biologists laugh at creatures they've never seen before

victor saying "hey babe" when he was told his wife was visiting in the viewing bay, hearing christina laugh in the background, and then him adding "i love you from the moon"

all of the clear & respectful communication about the light shade on the window. idk why it got me but it did. kind professionalism is crazy

pre-blackout goodbyes....real tears

"as we prepare to go out of radio communication, we’re still going to feel your love from Earth. and to all of you down there on Earth and around Earth, we love you, from the Moon." "when we burned this burn from the Moon, i said that we do not leave Earth, but we choose it. and that is always true. we will always choose Earth. we will always choose each other." come ONNNNN #hopecore #girlwhoisgoingtobeokay

the return speeches as well

"integrity, from Earth, our single system, fragile and interconnected, we copy. those of us that can are looking back."

seeing the integrity, the moon, and the earth all together in one shot. i took like 30 screenshots

mission control literally jumping up and down over impact flares

everything about the eclipse shot including the radio-in saying it was too incredible to capture on camera and "we're going true sci-fi"

everything else

my coworker in her 70s looking over my shoulder every 20 minutes and gasping and saying "that's just so incredible......i hope my grandkids are seeing this"

copy love copy bracelet is my favorite i don't think i'll ever lose that one

[boss-of-armadildos]

Post corrections/clarifications are my favorite genre of humor: a compilation

[eggman-is-fat-mkay]

and of course who could forget the classics

[without-ado]

"Return to the Moon" Artemis Ⅱ 2026

l Andrew McCarthy 1,2 l Alex G Perez 3,4 l Alexander Gerst 5