ok well maybe her little finger is really cozy and honestly there are worse places to be wrapped around. did you ever think about that

Product Placement

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@the-vampire-enthusiast
ok well maybe her little finger is really cozy and honestly there are worse places to be wrapped around. did you ever think about that
Someone was just setting the table for Christmas lunch when they took half a minute to lay out this vocabulary-changing bsky post, then carried on with their day...
oh my goodness, one of dian fossey’s first close up observations with gorillas happened when she was trying to climb a tree to see them better, but so badly that by the time she’d gotten up the entire group had come out of hiding to look at her: “Nearly all members of the group had totally exposed themselves, forgetting about hiding coyly behind foliage screens because it was obvious to them that the observer had been distracted by tree-climbing problems, an activity they could understand.”
hello, fellow apes
The lead up to that sentence is gold:
[Image transcript: porch. The group had been day-nesting and sunbathing when I contacted them, but upon my approach they nervously retreated to obscure themselves behind thick foliage. Frustrated but determined to see them better, I decided to climb a tree, not one of my better talents. The tree was particularly slithery and, try as I might, no amount of puffing, pulling, gripping, or clawing succeeded in getting me more than a few feet aboveground. Disgustedly, I was about to give up when Sanwekwe came to my aid by giving one mighty boost to my protruding rump; tears were running from his eyes as he was convulsed in silent laughter. I felt as inept as a baby taking its first step. Finally able to grab on to a conveniently placed branch, I hauled myself up into a respectful semislouch position in the tree about twenty feet from the ground. By this time I naturally assumed that the combined noises of panting, cursing, and branch-breaking made during the initial climbing attempts must have frightened the group on to the next mountain. I was amazed to look around and find that the entire group had returned and were sitting like front row spectators at a sideshow. All that was needed to make the image complete were a few gorilla-sized bags of popcorn and some cotton candy! This was the first live audience I had ever had in my life and certainly the least expected.]
imagine some freakish not-a-human alien THING has shown up out of nowhere and is trying to get into your office building to study you. but it has no idea how to get past a revolving door. it tries for three hours. by the time it finally understands the concept of a revolving door and squeeze into the building everyone in the office is crowded into the lobby to watch and call helpful suggestions. it’s conclusively determined that the alien is definitely not a threat, except maybe to itself.
Addition approved
req'd by @sludge-wizard
the fact that I'm only able to focus on writing on trains....
text: Category 7 autism event
Simon and gar phone call
THE SHEEP DETECTIVES (2026) dir. Kyle Balda
There's an open pit in the middle of our office plan that drops down into a bunch of very sharp spikes that kill you instantly. This is bad. People keep falling in there and dying. Someone put a sign up, the other day, all bright yellow so you can't miss it, that says "Beware!!! Spikes!!!"
The office immediately split into two factions over it. One says that if anyone falls in the spike pit it's their own fault for being so stupid and not watching where they're walking, so we should remove the sign. The other says that the sign is an insult, there shouldn't be a spike pit in our office at all, and having the sign up like that is just normalising the existence of the spike pit, so we should remove the sign.
We ended up removing the sign. Probably for the better. Still... for a while there it looked like it might have worked...
Nobody has ever been capable of writing a scathingly harsh and well formulated satire about the perils of modern capitalism, that doesn't just get immediately one-upped by some random food service worker talking about their actual week.
Not enough stories with disabled protags who were once independent loners and abled struggling with their new reality of relying on others. Where is the anger? . Where is your rage? Lets scream abt it. Rage rage rage.
Theres too much tip-toeing around the writing of violatile emotions for my liking when its part of the grief for your own body/ability. Grief thats mistaken for ungratefulness. Whatever.
But that would probably require equal respect and emotional grace for disabled people that people give their caretakers so like lmao.
Im gonna be so real i think that people are scared to show anger from disabled people bc they are scared of seeing disabled people through a lense of the average person.
They think the most saintly thing you can do is care for someone disables but don't care about the emotions the disabled person themselves feel. Once you reach a certain threshold of disability, people stop seeing you as on the same level of humanity as everyone else. So the thought of a disabled person actually having negative emotion towards this help is shocking to them.
Sympathy is handed out to those exhausted and hurt from having to care for disabled people (which is fine), but not those whom may be in the process of mourning their own bodies/ability/mind. We can show a nurse/doctor having a breakdown, have entire genres of show and movie and book revolve around it, but if a disabled person lashes out thats seen as something much crueler in the eyes of the typical viewer. Its spoken about in the same vein of a dog who bites and thus "needs to be put down".
Why? Why? One day that could be you. You are not safe from one day becoming disabled. Nobody is.
Watching the new Folding Ideas video and I can't stop thinking that Mr Beast is unsatisfied because he doesn't have a fandom. He is dying to understand where to throw money to make fandom happen. It gives me great pleasure to know that we hold the power to keep mr. Beast miserable
When Dan Olson said that Mr Beast's people asked him and a bunch of other youtubers "How do you create fandom", I experienced a moment of terror so visceral that my heart jumped into my throat. But luckily what followed was a thorough reassurance that he would never be able to understand the answer to that question.
The reason WHY Team Beast wants to "create fandom" is because they have an awareness that fandom is something that makes Number Go Up, and they want to have access that sort of loyalty and attention. But fandom isn't really something you create intentionally, it's more of a natural side effect of caring about something a lot, and going about the business of expressing how much you care, and finding community that cares in a similar way. But Mr Beast and his team do not actually care about anything at all, except Number Go Up. Everything Team Beast does is just a random exercise in throwing money at different ideas to see which makes Number Increase More.
Team Beast made chocolate bars because they know their audience of kids likes and buys candy, not because they liked candy or were interested in the process of making good candy. This is how they ended up making a chocolate bar that lacked the pre-sectioned bar shape that any other reputable candy maker has known and utilized for decades.
Team Beast made a reality show, because they know that reality shows are popular, and that Squid Game was a massive cross-cultural phenomenon, not because they care about reality shows, or are interested in telling stories about the limits of human cooperation and integrity in high stress, high rewards situations. This is how they ended up making a reality show with too many people to focus on any sort of interesting individual narratives, filled with elimination challenges that didn't work.
Team Beast is basically going down a checklist of "what activities that have the highest profits/highest level of public awareness associated with them" because they want that Simple Numerical Supremacy that comes from them, not because they care about the actual activities themselves. This also explains why Dan Olson was invited to Team Beast's studios to begin with. They probably only have a vague awareness of him as a guy on youtube with a million subscribers, and a 2 hour documentary about NFTs that is apocryphally regarded as the Film That Ended The Business. They don't actually care about what he or other youtubers consider important. They just want their fandoms.
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Write it badly or it'll never be written
Please keep interacting with this post because when I come to tumblr to procrastinate, this shows up again in my notifications and guilts me into writing again
touches U in a very weird but non sexual way
the situation with harry potter is kind of unprecedented in some ways imo because it is maybe the largest media franchise in history to be created & owned by a single person who still has direct creative control over it. who is also a billionaire with significant cultural/political influence. like the usual "no ethical consumption under capitalism" type excuses shatter on impact when the bigoted author in question is logging onto twitter every day saying explicitly that when you buy the tim hortons ravenclaw donut she is using your donut money to fund the genocide of trans people. like with big franchises usually there's at least a little more diffusion of responsibility than this
mutual just posted "ok i'm normal now". objective: survive their reverse-chronological dashboard breakdown (wave 1 of 30)
If you saw me recreationally vaccinating homeschooled children with blow darts then you should be thanking me, no? Relax a little. Blow darts are cool
You are just jealous of my ethical human safari
they matched each others freak. 42 injured. 7 dead. 12 missing.
I am a huge fan of retiring to my quarters
In this economy you'll be lucky to retire to your nickels