TW:Small Mentions of Murder, S**f Harm Panic Attacks and mentions of toxic relationships
Hey Apple Slices...There's something that I have wanting to get this out of my chest for a while now. I know I told my friends about this but...I just need to vent a lot here.
So....The reason why I sometimes don't post videos on my channel normally....Well..That's because I have been griefing of losing my aunt like a year ago and my parents are currently are going through a divorce. I didn't want to say anything to all of you guys because I don't want you guys to worry...You guys see the news about this woman before? That's my Aunt Gina...I'm one of her nieces, and in the video, the one with the light blue shirt was my Aunt Tina.
Almost a year ago..My Aunt Gina was tragically sh*t by her ex, I couldn't even describe of when I first heard about the news. I heard my mom screaming in bloody murder while I was with my sister. I will never forget her screams and that awful day when I heard about the news. I miss my aunt so much..I love you Aunt Gina...I still miss you everyday, your ex took you and the family members away from us....
And about my parents are going through a divorce because they just never get along anymore and they were toxic to each other and my father is currently trying to make my mother's life a living hell all because she moved on.
Through the divorce, I have been getting mental breakdowns and panic attacks due to my parents fighting all of the time. I remember a few times they were fighting in front of me, and I even sometimes see my mother throws things in anger (she even broke a door once, if I remember..). I even got a few nightmares because of this. Not only that, I even self harm one time but I didn't do it again because I regret of what i did.
And before people are saying my mother isn't abusive..she ISN'T!! MY MOTHER IS NOT A BAD PERSON! My father gets her to the point where she gets ticked off easily by my own father. But in the end, my mother decided to divorce my narcissistic and toxic father (He was Hiding some things from her to be honest). And since everything...I haven't been the same since my aunt's death and my parents divorce, plus I was also grieving of my cat, Bianco, that we have to put down due to an heart condition, it's been a year since we had to put him down. We did gave him medicine but nothing worked and he just kept peeing everywhere and he was in pain. Which is why we have to put him down..I still miss him everyday.
But don't worry everyone. I am doing okay at the moment, but I'm just mentally exhausted and drained from everything. I want to apologize for making you guys worry, i tried so hard to hide my feelings but I couldn't hold it anymore.
My mom told me that everything is going to be okay, we will get through this...Once everything is done, me, my mom and my sister will be getting some therapy after everything. This is Apple, signing for now. ❤️🩹