[zowieee]

[death-tones]

What does this mean?

[setbabiesonfire]

That, my friend, is exactly the question you have to ask.

[spacemuffinz]

YOU LEFT OUT THE MOTHERFUCKING CRYSTAL PYRAMIDS THEY FOUND ON THE FLOOR OF THE BERMUDA TRIANGLE

OLDER THAN THE AZTECS AND COMPLETELY SMOOTH AND 3 TIMES BIGGER THAN THE EGYPTIAN CHEOPS AND NO ONE KNOWS HOW IT GOT THERE.

[odin-n-out]

IM SORRY BUT WHY IS THIS THE FIRST TIME IVE HEARD OF THE CRYSTAL PYRAMIDS WHAT IS THIS SHIT

[brainwormunion]

OKAY HERE’S YOUR DEBRIEFING OF THE CRYSTAL PYRAMID BECAUSE THAT IS SOME CRAZY SHIT.

IN 2012 FRENCH AND AMERICAN SCIENTISTS STUDYING THE BERMUDA TRIANGLE STUMBLED UPON THIS HUGE TRANSLUCENT PYRAMID

THIS THING MEASURED 300 METERS WIDE AND 200 METERS TALL. THAT’S BIGGER THAN THE PYRAMIDS OF GIZA SO YOU COULD IMAGINE HOW CRAZY THIS WAS TO THE SCIENTISTS

NOW THIS IS ALL 2000 METERS UNDERWATER. THE SCIENTISTS THEN DISCOVERED TWO HOLES AT THE TOP OF THE PYRAMID THAT MOVE WATER THRU AT AN EXTREMELY FAST RATE. THIS CAUSES MASIVE SURGE WAVES AND MIST ON THE SURFACE. THAT MAY BE THE REASON FOR THE INCIDENTS WITH BOATS AND PLANES CRASHING THERE

THEY’RE SAYING THAT THIS PYRAMID COULD BE FROM THE TIME BEFORE THE BIBLE SAYS NOAH’S ARK HAPPENED

OR ALIENS

BUT WHATEVER IT IS THE BERMUDA TRIANGLE JUST GOT LIKE A BILLION TIMES CREEPIER

[gauldur-amulet]

If I was in charge of a Pokemon gym it’d be all fire themed. Like there’s just fire everywhere. There’s probably a random person on fire in the background. You have your team completely stacked against fire types. Everyone you fight before me has fire types. You get to me. Expecting more fire types. You send out your first Pokemon, a water type. I throw my pokeball. You expect the expected. A vaporeon comes out. My team is actually entirely made up of vaporeons. I only own vaporeons.

[dualcolours-old]

im the leader after you.

my gyms water themed. yu do water level puzzles and fight swimmers and those kids with the floaties. everyone has water types. knowing the theme, yo bring a team half/half strong against fire and water, just in case because ofnthe last gym. you get to me.

my team is made entirely of gastly, haunter, and gengar, all named exactly 5 purple hearts. i just really like gengar.

the gym? you ask.

it was on sale, i respond.

i cant even swim. ive been here for 6 weeks.

[cailleachy]

I’m the third gym leader…by this point you know what to expect.

You walk through the soft meadows of my gym thinking what should I expect this time? Electric types? FIRE TYPES???? You cross over a beautiful field of daises and tulips, encounter trainers wearing flowers crowns and boasting a plethora of high-level grass and fairy types. Than, deep in the forest while you’re still wondering how the fuck I fit all of this into one building, you encounter a ring of mushrooms, a fairy ring. Inside the ring sits me, the gym leader. You step into the ring ready for battle.

I stand up, walking slowly over to you take you’re hand in mine and gently place something cold and hard into your palm. 

It’s the fairy gyms badge.

I’m not even a Pokemon trainer, I just respond to an ad on craigslist for a gym leader and was the only applicant. 

You walk away very confused…and slightly disappointed. 

[ohlookskeletons-deactivated2021]

I’m some kid you meet on the road just beside the gym. At this point you are questioning why you keep going.

I ask you a bunch of questions and help you out and even give you a special Pokémon. Then I ask you if you’ve been to the gym and talk about the gym leader. When you say no I push you in the gym.

You battle rock types and you are wondering if you’re even prepared to fight the gym leader. When you finally get to the leaders room, I’m there.

I strike up a friendly conversation and ask you what you think of the gym. I then say “Thanks, I made this myself. It’s still growing. So if you come back I can give you the badge then but it hasn’t come in the mail yet.”

At this point you probably don’t even want to be there anymore. I hand you a small pin that is in the shape of the badge but it’s definitely homemade and cheep. “It’s an I.O.U” I say.

You leave wondering if leaving home at 10 to battle all of these strange people was really worth it.

[lleuslll]

In the next town you decide to speak to the citizens first instead of heading straight for the gym unprepared. They live here, you tell yourself, they must know about this gym and how it works. A pleasant old lady informs you the gym leader is dearly fond of psychic types and is not known to stray like previous trainers. You believe her. Why would an old lady lie to you?

After stocking your team with dark types you take the gym head on. Battling your way through psychic trainers with ease, you finally arrive to a large room. There I stand. The battle commences and you defeat my first two Pokemon, Hypno and Alakazam, with ease. You laugh to yourself, after the hardships of the previous gyms this is like child’s play. I send out my third Pokemon, a beedrill. Dark is weak to Bug. “Something bugging you buddy?” I say with a wink as I decimate your team. You leave without a badge.

Fuck this region.

[lettuce-gremlin]

By the time you reach the next town, you’re wondering if this Gym challenge was even worth this. Maybe it would have been better to do Competitions. But you continue trudging along.

Supposedly the Gym Leader uses fighting types. She’s a body builder who wrangles Krookodile in her free time. You don’t know what to expect, so you bring a few psychic and flying types, and then make the rest of your team fairly diverse type-wise just in case.

You’re able to battle your way through the trainers and work your way through the Rock Smash puzzle with little difficulty. You meet me in a small room with wrestling mats on the floor and dumbells next to the walls. I’m working out on the opposite side of the room. I set down the weights as you approach. “I take it you are here to battle me.”

You nod. I flex. “Very well. If you want to receive my badge, you’re going to have to fight me for it. Literally.”

You decide maybe you just weren’t cut out for the trainer life.

[sazandorable]

“The Gym Leader just does her own thing, pretty much. She couldn’t pick just one type or theme, she just uses Pokémon she finds cute.”

Oh, yeah, I’m one of those. You-can-win-with-any-Pokémon-just-use-what-you-like. Whatever, that one multi-types douche from Kanto was pretty predictable, typical species, no tricky type combinations. ‘Cute’, huh? You switch in a few Steel and Poison Pokémon, expecting a couple Fairies. You remember that one Pachirisu story and bring a Ground type, just in case.

My Gym has zero trainers, but it’s full of bright colors and cheery pastels, cushions and stuffed Pokémon toys lying around on the plush carpet — and not in the creepy abandoned-kid’s-room way, just genuinely cute and playful. Feel-good. I greet you with a pleasant smile and offer you candy.

Ok, your expectations have been punched in the face every time so far, but you’ve actually got my personality pinned down, and there is absolutely no threat in it. You relax, and actually feel confident for once.

“I’m not particularly good, let’s just have fun!” I tell you cheerfully. 

I send out a Hydreigon.

[theclitofthegods]

After all the hardships, you head to the last gym. The 8th badge. There is no way this gym is a hoax, a joke, or anything other than serious. At this point, most of your pokemon are fully evolved, and you are experienced beyond belief. You talk to residents of the town, and check out the signs outside the building coming to the conclusion the gym is steel type. The trainers prior to the leader are difficult, and the last trainer almost beat you using his steelix. After healing and restocking on potions, you enter my room. The room is dimly lit and rather large. Oil drums and metal beams are arranged in a little maze, making our encounter a difficult for you. Once we are in the same area, I quietly say "after all this time, your hardships will be rewarded with the final gym badge. Lets begin!" As you sent out your charizard, confident the pokemon you were given at the beginning of your journey can handle my steel types, I send out Kyogre. And use my blue orb. I have doomed the world to never-ending rain, but at least you won't get your badge.

[harusha]

Today’s Giveaway~

All Pokemon are EVed and BR (except for Feebas). All Pokemon have 4 egg moves and Hidden Powers are marked. This giveaway is for Sun and Moon.

11/27/2016

+Giveaway starts now and runs for 2 hours

Available Pokemon: Sandslash (Alolan), Ninetales (Alolan), Kommo-o, Feebas

The code is “Scale” (without quotations). You are allowed one of each. To get one, deposit a Meowth. Nickname the Meowth Scale and deposit it into the GTS.

If you have some time, please reblog and/or like this post so I know to check!

~Wren

[tomfletcherscats]

this is how u use tinder right

[tomfletcherscats]

he came out of left field with this one

[greenthumbshawty]

update: I banged him

[fuckstev-deactivated20240104]

Where'd you come up with your url?

there were seven eggs left

[27-teacups]

same

[fuckstev-deactivated20240104]

you must have a lot of tea cups

[27-teacups]

yes

[fuckstev-deactivated20240104]

i am very proud of your collection

[1000nipples]

hey guys

[fuckstev-deactivated20240104]

dude fholy shit

[spyadults]

the scariest president had to be Rushmore because he had four heads

[a-big-furry-rat]

it’s a good thing we captured him in that mountain even if we have to live in fear of the spell wearing off :/

[seeklight-deactivated20210703]

do we still believe this legend? come on ya’ll it’s 2016 Rushmore was killed a hundred years ago. We’re SAFE NOW.

[scottyottyotty]

We are never safe! The temple guards are starting to disappear…

[meanplastic]

[babydreamgirl-deactivated201902]

????????????????????????????? oh my god???

[i-peed-so-hard-i-laughed-deacti]

Bermuda Triangle

[tescosfinest-deactivated2013111]

AMERMRICA DOSNOT KNOW THE JOJ OF TETRIES CHOCLAY ORNAGE

[himbotheninth]

WHAT THE HEC IS THAT I SWE TO FIBLAY IF THIS US AMITHER FANTACLAY CANDE WHEL MIPPLING A

[tescosfinest-deactivated2013111]

heple

[plant-life-heart-blog]

HOL DOKE YOU GINSA LILIP WIPLI TETRU

[princeowl-deactivated20150410]

who’s gilli goshe oppler to film ass chili piss city and telma thelma brill wanks chocolay oranage eximpt evelemere 

[officialpupsi]

am I having a stroke

[asparagays]

she has such a funny life omg

[justastrongcountryboy-deactivat]

if your boyfriend isn’t strong enough to pick you up and pin you against the wall, you have a girlfriend.

[gang0fwolves-deactivated2018120]

……..what

[sonypraystation]

if your boyfriend doesn’t suplex you on sight he aint a man

[thepapayastand-deactivated20160]

if your boyfriend can’t catapult you across the room like a boomerang he a cactus

[hotephoetips-deactivated2017080]

if he don’t powerslam you for breakfast he a herb

[all1sees]

So Google does math for you??

division

square roots

dividing percentages

IT EVEN FOILS

beautiful.

[qurioq]

i just checked ALL of these on my calculator and they are all correct

all. fucking. correct.

[averagedopeydope]

DAYUM, SON! IF ONLY THIS WAS AVIALABLE WHEN I WAS ON SCHOOL >:(

[my-little-mod-blog]

HAH! You kids. When I was in school, it wouldn’t help because we still used Roman numerals back then!

AHAHAHAHAHA-

oh my god

i’ll just be over here shutting the fuck up right about now

[dutchster]

you can even solve geometric problems

or plot graphs

even 3D graphs!!!

[aureliusquinn]

Reblob to save a life

[danisontnonfire]

just reblobbed

[annulet]

reblobbing to help those in need

[theclitofthegods]

Be the dumpster of your dreams

[stability]

[theclitofthegods]

When Pokemon Go comes out I'll be like

Me: *packing my stuff into my backpack* Okay mom I'm leaving! I'll be back whenever!

Mom: WaHt!! Where are you going?!

Me:*looking dramatically into the distance* I'm going off to become a Pokemon Master

[keaneries]

every dog owner’s worst nightmare

[surprisebitch]

finally someone said it

[newswearword-deactivated2019101]

[mercedesbenzodiazepine]

What the fuck does this mean

[stability]

they have a little sister

[weloveshortvideos]

Jump!!

[busket]

she did a great job