[leeeeeeeeeegooooooooolaaaaaaaaas]

Mounted one magic sword on the wall. The cost? My marriage.

[iwilleatyourenglish]

this is how my boyfriend asks me to stream dark souls iii for him

[iwilleatyourenglish]

he is

[teathattast]

[notactuallythebrand7up]

[icedlondonfrog]

[agreyeyedgirl]

[canthaveshitingotham-crucified]

every artist who has ever attempted to satirize masculinity i am so sorry

[canthaveshitingotham-crucified]

you could name a movie Portrait of a delusional abuser ruining his own life in pursuit of a fictional standard of manhood and 89% of its fanbase would still be like "Fuck yeah man it was so cool when Shit Cumdick gave that badass speech about how pushing everyone away and never letting yourself feel emotions is actually a good idea for your life. fuckin dope flick"

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

Have fun in the war dumbass I’ll be at home fucking military wives

[unbossed-deactivated20251218]

[eastbayfatman]

Damn. Good way to get your fucking windows kicked in

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

shut the fuck up and raise my son bootlicker

[lowtiermemer]

All fun and games until someone with 3 confirmed kills shows up at your doorstep with a baseball bat

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

im not at my house tho, im at yours with your wife

[penguitron-deactivated20211130]

But he’s got shooters all over the world 🌎 even when he’s away

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

just shot a load in his wife

[hitting-on-cullen-deactivated20]

You ungrateful asshole. My bf might be fighting for your freedom and you’re here mocking him for keeping your pathetic ass safe from the threats of the world. If a war comes to our country, we’re not saving you, you dumbass ungrateful fuck up of a human being.

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

Your bf is fighting for oil and killing civilians and probably cheating on you he’s a scumbag, which is why I just fucked his mom to make a better son

[thetyrannosaur]

[general-multi-fandom-chaos]

i can't believe a bunch of grown men named Josh showed up to some random park with the intention of fighting each other and then let some four year old named Josh win. there's so much hope for our society.

[evilbuildingsblog]

Football stadiums look like giant eyes when viewed from above

[saint-batrick]

i don’t like knowing this.

[cipheramnesia]

Evil eye collecting and focusing powerful forces of enormous hatred.

[metapianycist]

this is why aliens won’t visit

[splicky]

Earth has evolved false eyes to ward off planetary predators

[heedra]

it’s legitimately so fucked up and heartbreaking that in this society the ability to just like…relax and have fun with friends and loved ones is like…considered something you have to earn or make time at your own expense for. it should be regarded as one of the inalienable cornerstones of being human. i’m not joking, like the fact that having fun and chilling with your buds is considered an expendable frivolity instead of a vital core need is heartbreaking. not that capitalist society has ANY vital core needs that it’s not prepared to gate behind a monetary cost though lmao.

[valtsv]

math people scare me. math people will be like "math works in mysterious ways TO YOU. i get it though." and they do and it's fucking terrifying.

[valtsv]

and if you ask them to elaborate they will but then you'll wish they didn't

[valtsv]

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[tygermama]

finally a house with the correct amount of books in it

[manforsale]

[theproblematicblogger]

Despite every moment of life being indescribably precious and a wondrous mystery, I will spend it caring about dividends and how many rental properties I have.

[brownfeministaa]

Rich people are truly dead inside. 

[baconandawesome]

[wetwareproblem]

There’s a line there that kinda sticks out at me:

“The plan was to grow our money so we could feel financially secure enough to have a baby.”

This is a couple that’s already worth three million dollars. They own their own home. They have a passive monthly income of $12.5k without lifting a single finger, and he can make $30k/mo working for 60 hours. To put that in normal 40-hour weeks, this means that he works until mid-May, takes the rest of the year off, and makes five hundred and sixty thousand dollars for his trouble, on top of the three million they already have and any income she might have.

tl;dr: That’s a lot of fucking money for very little effort.

And these people are scared. They think that thisisn’t enough money for them to raise a child

Capitalism will always keep you feeling hungry and desperate and on the edge of collapse. It runs on people feeling that way, and it will never let you go no matter how loyally you serve it.

[mizzmello]

@ the ppl who claim Light had a long and tumultuous downfall to insanity caused by the “power of the notebook”…. he’s literally calling himself God and screaming at a TV halfway into the second episode? I mean, relatable, but hardly a journey…

[portaljumper339]

Dude saw the slippery slope and decided to grab a sled

[fullymechanized-consoomer]

I don’t even have anything funny to say that is just really sweet 

[fullymechanized-consoomer]

[ariesfire0704]

There is a statue in Cork to commemorate the donation of the Choctaw people to the Irish people, It is called Kindred Spirits.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kindred_Spirits_(sculpture)

[false-dawn]

Please click here to reach the Navajo & Hopi Families COVID-19 Relief Fund!

[thedevilxanax]

[chemtrailguy]

[rainbow-femme]

Literally the best part of Breaking Dawn is Renesmee getting sad that she doesn’t sparkle like the others, and Bella saying “You’re the prettiest” followed immediately by Edward saying “I have to disagree” right in front of her

Like I get Edward can’t turn off the Bella Compliment Machine but imagine being self conscious about your looks and your mom is like “oh honey I think you’re the best looking one here.” And then your dad walks in like “What? No she’s not.”

[notquitetwilight]

this is so fucking funny bruh I’m physically crying bc I forgot smeyer needed her self-insert to be so not-like-other-girls that not even her kid could be complimented more highly than her by her own damn parents sjsjggzksndhxkdjdbshsissks

[lord-armitage]

World’s Best Father right here 

[its-the-fluorescence]

Ok but now that I’m re-reading the text....

Why does it come across like Edward means

No, you bland looking child. It is I who is the prettiest.