thinking again about Hal and him being the Safe Place, the Inspiration, and what that means for him. His comfortable home with its many guest rooms, the place, immediately, where everyone thinks to go when they're afraid and have nowhere else. He knows it, too. he offers that safety and comfort to the people he cares for, and crucially, to Thimble, who accepts this place as being her new home in nearly the same breath as she decides to leave it.
but being the person that people rely on for safety has its own cost. he's the one who keeps getting left behind -- Thaisha, for her calling, Thimble, for her promise, Thjazi, for his ideals. he's the one who by necessity is protected and kept in the dark -- by Bolaire, by Thjazi, by everyone who tells him over and over that they need him to have enough distance, to keep him safe, to keep his family safe, and in the end, to keep the rest of them safe as well through the kind of work that only he can do. to preserve his ability to protect, he must be protected and lied to. the very inspiration that the people who love him treasure also lead them away from his side. god, what does it MEAN if your art made someone love the world so much they had to leave you?
and you can see there's a part of him that is ready to leave. it's not that he's stifled, or that he aches for adventure (he loves his home. he loves what he's trying to build. he wants things to be happy and comfortable for the people he loves). but he picks up his brother's sword, and there's a part of him that clearly wants to go out as an avenger. He needs to be talked down into staying, because he's NEEDED where he is, doing what he is best at. but I think that kind of responsibility also probably hurts him, in its way.
