WWX: You're the most jealous man I know.
Drunk LWJ: You know other men?
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WWX: You're the most jealous man I know.
Drunk LWJ: You know other men?
Kidnapper: We are holding your brother captive.
JC: Good, I need a break.
WWX: A-cheng!
LWJ: Do I discipline the guy or do I join him?
Wen Ning: When you die, people cry and beg for you to come back.
Lan Jingyi: But when you do, then there's the running and screaming.
Wei Wuxian: *nods*
Wen Qing:
Lan Sizhui:
Ouyang Zizhen:
Lan Wangji:
Jiang Cheng:
Lan Wangji: I'm sorry, Wei Ying. I'll come back to Cloud Recesses in two days.
Wei Wuxian:
Wei Wuxian: Leave Bichen here.
Lan Wangji:
Lan Wangji:
Lan Wangji: We're going together.
JGY, looking through his closet: What should I change into?
WWX: A better person.
JC: I'm a peaceful person.
WWX: You threw a chair at me earlier.
JC: Which is a peaceful compromise from the table I initially wanted to throw.
Wei Wuxian: Good morning, grumpy Uncle.
Lan Qiren: Good morning, problem child.
WWX: What do you want for breakfast, Lan Zhan?
LWJ: *unties his headband*
WWX, groaning: I meant food!
OZZ: Is stabbing someone immoral?
JL: Not if they consent to it.
LJY: Depends on who you're stabbing.
LSZ: YES!? What is wrong with you guys?
How Remus ended up with Sirius in his arms:
Sirius: Meant to say "hold on for a second" and "give me a minute" and it came out as "hold me for a second".
LWJ has some of the most creative bedroom moves ever known to mankind.
And they are known to mankind because WWX can't stop gushing about them.
Much to the embarassment and dismay of Lan juniors.
JC is affected vicariously through JL who excitedly and disgustedly and angrily tells his uncle all the stories he heard during his vacation at Cloud Recesses (they are mostly his adventures with his friends but WWX's antics also get included somehow).
So every summer after JL returns from his vacay, JC goes into seclusion for a week to forget what he heard.
LWJ, in his diary: God didn't know what he was doing when he created me.
LWJ: I was supposed to be a loner but then he got the idea of Wei Wuxian.
LWJ: Uncle always has a problem with what I'm doing.
LXC: Probably because you're always doing WWX.
LWJ: *chokes*
help i can’t stop making these
Lan Qiren, eyeing LWJ critically: Good boys go to heaven.
LWJ, eyeing WWX hungrily: But bad boys bring heaven to you.
Wei Wuxian: Can you help me with this zipper, Lan Zhan?
Lan Wangji: Mn.
Wei Wuxian:
Wei Wuxian: I meant up!