Little Heretic

Gay the pray away. Queer cult survivor. UK.

[thelittlehereticsstuff]

This is a call to all for those who have suffered in silence due to religious trauma. You are not alone!

You are understood, acknowledged, heard, and part of a large community. There are people here who “get it,” who can relate, and who will validate your feelings. You are a member of a vast network of people seeking the same peace and healing as you are.

I hope that you are able to find some comfort here, just as I have. Even if you read just one thing that resonates with your heart, that one thing can give you hope; that things can get better, that people are good, that you are good!

You are good. You are valid and worthy and beautiful, exactly as you are. There is nothing inherently wrong or sinful about you, despite what you have been told.

[chrisfriel]

wednesday magazine 010626

rarely do interviews these days have little left to contribute but couldn't say no to a line up of 20 greats including nick cave, john capenter and norman reedus

a wonderful publication

article www.wednesdaymagazine.com

[vintage-tigre]

[missingvibrance]

one of the greatest tragedies in life is that you will always be loved more than you will ever know. someone in class finds your presence inviting and warm, even if you’ve only ever exchanged a few words with them—maybe none at all. someone on the street loves your smile and it gets them down the next few streets. someone you used to be friends with still wishes to fondly call your name. someone you used to be friends with five years ago would give anything to be in the same room as you today. someone who regularly comes into work is disappointed when you aren’t there to brighten their day. someone missed you today. someone noticed you were gone. someone loves you when you’re there; someone loves you when you’re nowhere to be found at all. you think you have always disappeared when you’re no longer in the picture, but you’ve never left the frame.

[cupidsquilll]

[57papercranes]

Thinking about Half-Man, and Make Sure You Die Screaming, and Jax TADC, and people I’ve known, and myself and ways that I’ve been, and queerness, and trauma, and anger, and how abuse is cyclical, and and and. In a world where you’re punished for existing it seems a little bit inevitable that we turn into a bit of the monster everyone is afraid we will become. That we develop maladaptive coping mechanisms that haunt us into adulthood and turn us into worse versions of ourselves than we thought we were capable of becoming. And it’s understandable and it’s pitiable, but that doesn’t change the fact that we are still responsible for our own lives and the effects we have on other people. And everyone is capable of change and growth, even when you’ve been beaten down your whole life and don’t have the strength to fight anymore. You still have to change. You still have to grow. And you have to figure out how to self-actualize and be the person you are inside outside everywhere all the time and that’s like an imperative to live. It’s like. that’s the only way you will be able to live. That’s the only way to survive. You have to change and you have to have fun and be yourself, basically. I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore it’s like 6am and I haven’t slept but I love queer people and queer stories and if you’re reading this there’s hope and you can survive. It’s exhausting but you can survive.

[skulandcrossbones]

[nimfeach]

fascinated by the ways niall/ruben are perceived & received (by other characters and by audiences). everyone sees how niall destroys himself over and over, but less how he also destroys those around him. everyone sees how ruben destroys the people around him, over and over, but less the ways he is also destroying himself. how each of them get half of the perception and understanding that should be afforded to a complete human being.

[bellamyblcke]

they want to fuck each other so bad it makes them enact increasingly complex crimes against each other in order to prove that they’re actually the one with the power that they’re one DOING the fucking & not the one getting fucked over

[filmsonvideo]

"niall thinks for a moment terrified of his own power before giving an almost imperceptible nod" oh ok

[make-a-desert-call-it-peace]

@untouchedsoap how dare you leave this gold in the tags oh my god

[boo-kei]

he knows exactly what he's doing

[bruisecest]

god also can’t stop thinking about just how disgustingly delusionally twisted-up codependent attached at the hip teen rubambi must’ve been in the years pre-uni for lori of all people to have to tell niall they were too close like. sharing everything from spliffs and sandwiches to deodorant and even their toothbrushes, no use for the closet or the dresser being separated anymore, it’s all just one big pile they both grab from, getting up at the same time and going to bed at the same time and sleeping in the same bed even in the summer, everything hot and sticky, ruben’s arm low over niall’s stomach, the two of them finishing each others sentences like twins and talking through the bathroom door, ruben taking bites off niall’s plate like it was his own and niall drinking from ruben’s glass without asking, listening to the same music and watching the same films, even indiana jones, walking everywhere together or else taking ruben’s bike, niall’s arms round ruben’s waist this time, just always togethertogethertogether and no one daring to say a thing about it, until one morning about a week before niall is set to leave for uni lori watches him come downstairs wearing the entire outfit ruben had been wearing the day before, head to toe, all of it still unwashed and rumpled and she could swear it’s even the socks and even — even the boxers and when she looks up at ruben his eyes flash something animal dangerous, something that says MINE, and she has to look away and bite her tongue to stop herself from saying what she really wants to say about it, and it’s right then and there that she decides that once niall gets out of this house and ruben’s grip she can never, ever let him come back

[its-emimi]

Happy Pride month! 🌈

[resignedseraph]

Thinking abt the irony of having to sing Your Love Never Fails every Sunday for months, all while still being like, actively abused 😐

“What made you feel so disillusioned with God?” probably being forced to sing “there may be pain in the night but joy comes in the morning” every Sunday while that joy and rescue didn’t come, week after week

[darkness-follows]

I was done with men Richard. Wtf.

[wulfhalls]

ruben’s speech about wasting almost all his life stuck in a box is also about his relationship with niall. like he spent all that time in a self-imposed prison because he couldn’t bear to be vulnerable enough to accept just how much he loved niall (because in his mind men can love each other but not THAT MUCH). so he wasted time caged instead of spending more time with him

every line in this show is about them and it drives me fucking crazy. that funeral speech is the best and worst thing thats ever happened to me. that was richard gadd throwing us a bone because he knew that inevitably bleak fucking ending would have us on the brink. or when niall was telling mona how free she looked when he saw her dancing when they were younger (he was talking about watching ruben) or when alby asked if he ever had feelings for a man and mr its the only thing ive ever felt said yes Only Once (he was talking about ruben) they're always talking about each other except when they're talking to each other 👍

[mihaser]

never ceases to amaze me how people come to the place literally known as a "hellsite" with their black and white books to play moral police