The Master of Allusion

Do you see what I did there?

[beautiful-songbird]

How the new Odyssey movie sounds to me based off of what I’ve seen on tumblr

[gsirvitor]

[themasterofallusion]

Goncharov by Christopher Nolan

[sludgebitch]

this thing contains the divine spark. it evolved from ancient ungulates like whales did

[electronicdwarf]

This thing is climate change incarnate.Stop personifying evil like it’s cute and cares about you

[sludgebitch]

this thing is my girlfriend and she lets me cum inside unprotected

[themasterofallusion]

We need to build these with big guns on them

[conzoop]

it's punk to cum #cumpunk

[oatmonger]

Y'all ever pace

[knowledgetosorrow]

Love it 👍

[themasterofallusion]

I pace like an anxious zoo animal

[gingik]

[themasterofallusion]

We take thousands of lives just to eat one loaf

Every wheat berry, an abortion

[tragicwaif]

When they torture u to insanity and then torture you for being insane 😂😂😂

[themasterofallusion]

Rubber room full of rats

[lokihiddleston]

KIKI'S DELIVERY SERVICE (1989)

[gsirvitor]

OP blocked me for saying this, but I'll say it again here, this isn't even a joke, he actually says this in the movie.

[themasterofallusion]

looks like we'll have to go on a The Odyssey (tm)

[punishedsaints]

[crazy-brazilian]

why would the chinese give a fuck about 911? you gringos are so delusional

[themasterofallusion]

where 2 cop???

[9ieme]

the twelve most terrifying words in the english language are: i'm from the government and i'm here to torture you to death

[themasterofallusion]

Well at least we get to die

[beardedmrbean]

[themasterofallusion]

I don’t remember that expansion

[woodrider]

Bruh this coffee I bought is so good I'm so fuckin alert rn I could probably do a math problem

[woodrider]

I don't know

[antarcticconfessions-deactivate]

I love how it doesn't matter what expedition it is.

They all turn into excited kids when they meet penguins.

[asteroidtroglodyte]

The Penguin: GIANTS! no way! I’m gonna wave at them THEY WAVED BACK! Holy Shit they’re dancing with me! My Wife is never gonna believe this OMG I got to dance with a Giant today so cool.

The Humans: Penguin! No way! I’m gonna wave at it IT WAVED BACK! Holy Shit it’s flapping with me! I got to play with a Penguin today; so cool.

[givemeafuckingjoint]

where's the joy and whimsy guy? Have they found this one yet?

[redmegarex]

@joy-and-whimsy-official

[joy-and-whimsy-official]

Joy and whimsy detected! This post is joyful and whimsical!

Who am I to deny a penguin some joy and whimsy 🐧

[b0nkcreat]

Random stinging pain in my neck 👀

[creepymutelilbugger]

atacked by my #MindWasp

[b0nkcreat]

Can you put those things on a leash please

[creepymutelilbugger]

Yeah. a really Long one so they can still get u tho

[b0nkcreat]

Commentary on: Society

[themasterofallusion]

those look like normal #MyWasps and not #MindWasps

[crisis-actor]

ukulele players genocide now

[themasterofallusion]

clarification, do we genocide the ukulele players or are you commanding the ukulele players to commit genocide?

[crisis-actor]

do you really think these "people" are capable of doing anything other than sexual assault

[themasterofallusion]

[crisis-actor]

ukulele players genocide now

[themasterofallusion]

clarification, do we genocide the ukulele players or are you commanding the ukulele players to commit genocide?

[frankenmouse]

It is so ridiculously easy to gain a reputation for being competent by just reading signs.

This is not metaphorical. I mean actual, literal pieces of paper/plastic/metal/whatever explicitly erected to inform the public.

“How did you know this was the right trail?” I read the sign.

“Wow, how did you know what that flower is?” There’s a SIGN.

“How did you know we needed to use the side door?” THERE IS A SIGN POSTED ON THE FRONT DOOR.

Just…why are we having such different experiences of the world? People can read. I KNOW they can read. There’s nothing wrong with their vision.

Just. READ. THE. GOD. DAMN. SIGN.

This also applies to:

Syllabi

Instructions

[solarishashernoseinabook]

Plain text of the small text:

This also applies to:

Syllabi

Instructions

[dewberrybramble]

THIS ALSO APPLIES TO ERROR CODES.

[themasterofallusion]

Contracts, proposals, spec sheets

Our business group is all about reading the damn contract but then wrote a contract saying our data center would use zero gallons of water. They have water for cleaning the BESS and solar panels but gave us literally nothing