| Irish Coffee |
summary: twenty four was the wrong age for everything, except maybe picking up girls in bars at the holidays. Rafe Cameron x Reader
word count: 3.8k
warnings: bars, alcohol, passing mention of sexual assault, death of a parent mention.
Rafe Cameron hated karaoke. It was shitty ego-stroking from typically the very intoxicated or the very tone deaf. He didnât think anyone ever felt good about their performances on that rinkydink stage anyway. It was unpleasant for everyone involved. Truth be told, Rafe thought karaoke was pointless entirely. If he wanted to hear a good version of a song, he would go on Spotify and find one. He thought karaoke was a selfish sport made fun only for the singer, and never for the listener.
In summation, it was fucking stupid.
When he got in Topperâs Jeep, Rafe had been too tipsy to fully comprehend that it was karaoke night at the Swordfish. Now, with another tumbler of b-list bourbon between Rafeâs knuckles, he moped on a stool at the bar.
He felt old when he went out with Kelce, Topper and their other friends. He had started college while some of the other boys heâd grown up with were in their junior year of high school. Rafe didnât have friends. He wasnât good at keeping them and didnât like it when they complained about their problems that werenât even really problems. The persona he had crafted for dealing with friends, though, had gotten elaborate enough to where Rafe thought they didnât notice that his heart wasnât in it.
He didnât have friends, he had the people he drank with. That was better than drinking alone.
Being twenty-four sucked. Too old for ragers, too young for drinks at the country club. Too many big problems to solve, but everyone thinking he was too young to solve him. Rafe wondered, if he drank enough, could he blackout the whole of his twenties and then he wake up in his thirties locked and loaded?
Some drunk whore was finishing up a song Rafe had only heard in Sofiaâs car. Sheâd played it often. He didnât know what it was called. It was by one of those superstar white girls with the zillion dollar concert tickets. Rafe didnât like it. He didnât like Sofia either anymore. He didnât like to think about her anymore.
His heartbeat raced. His could feel it beat in his neck when he drank too much. It didnât used to be that way. The human body couldnât fail from misuse before thirty, could it? Rafe took a sharp inhale through his nose to push the frantic thoughts away. Everyone leaves eventually, he reminded himself; a mantra. Fuck, he wanted a cigarette.
Topper was on Ruthie leaning up on the wall near a booth. They were out of commission til she got pissy at him for breathing wrong, or something, and they all had to make excuses to leave. Normal Friday night.
Rafe wished heâd stayed home.
A DJ mumbled that the next person was taking the stage, singing Hard Candy Christmas by Dolly Parton. Arguably, this was Rafeâs favorite Christmas song because it had been his motherâs favorite Christmas song.
It was also the week before Thanksgiving and Rafe didnât think he could stomach Christmas yet.
âShitâŠâ Rafe muttered into his glass of bourbon.
The girl supposed to sing was being pushed up into the tiny stage by a group of drunk girls. Presumably a bachelorette party by the looks of it. The girl onstage had a frown of surprise on her lips. It was clear to Rafe that she didnât know this was going to happen. A girl in her party, wearing a veil headband, called out: âPlease! This is our song. Please do it for me? You sound so pretty, [Y/N].â
All of her friends were calling and chanting for her to sing. The girl, [Y/N], looked embarrassed. She was very put on the spot.
Eventually, with all the cheering, pleading and encouragement, [Y/N] walked to the center of the stage where the microphone stood.
âForgive me if this is dogshit, my friends signed me up,â The girl said over the karaoke trackâs intro. A few of the girls she was with cheered. âI didnât come to butcher Dolly in front of yâall.â
This yielded a chuckle from her audience. Rafe rolled his eyes. He was less interested in her humble act, and more interested in where he knew from. Rafe knew a lot of people, and he was starting to cling to the barstool to do what his legs were struggling to do. [Y/N] was a common enough name, but this girl looked so fucking familiar to him. His drunk mind leafed through the catalog of women in his brain. [Y/N], [Y/N], [Y/N], where did he know her from?
Her clothes werenât anything special. Standard bachelorette party fare. A little too short, but not quite slutty. She was a bridesmaid, maybe the maid of honor. Rafe wrinkled his nose in thought. His contacts stung dry against his eyes. He had stared at a screen too long in the office and now he was sitting under a vent in November. Who the hell left the A/C on in November?
[Y/N]. Rafe hadnât hooked up with her before. He didnât think he had, anyway. She didnât appear to have botox in her face or filler in her top lip with the way she expressed so freely. That meant she couldnât have been the kid of one of his dadâs business contacts.
He looked at her friends for clues. Immediately, Rafe recognized the bride. Wendy. Rafe had hooked up with Wendy a few times in high school. He was surprised to see she was still on the island; Wendy had been smarter than that. So Rafe probably knew [Y/N] from school, then. What classes had they shared? He tried to place her.
[Y/N] was working through the slow first verse. She didnât have a perfect, trained voice. Her voice was the kind of voice that sang in the kitchen on Saturday mornings to the radio. A smirk pulled at Rafeâs lip. She wasnât forcing it, and she wasnât so drunk that it was pathetic to listen to. âI hate singing in front of peopleâŠâ she said.
[Y/N] knelt and set down what appeared to be an Irish coffee, and put her left hand over eyes. No ring, Rafe thought. He almost puked at the thought that looking at babes in bars now came with seeing if they were married or engaged, before giving them the once over. Being twenty-four sucked. The girl swayed from side to side on her feet as she moved from the second half of the first verse to the chorus.
âŠMaybe I'll just get drunk on apple wine.
Me, I'll be just fine and dandy.
Lord, it's like a hard candy Christmas.
I'm barely getting through tomorrow,
But still I won't let sorrow bring me way downâŠ
The girl took some liberties with how she improvised the line endings or creating a harmony line instead of the melody during the way too repetitive chorus. It wasnât like she was doing something revolutionary, but she also wasnât just up there doing a cheesy impression of Dolly.
It was a welcome change of pace from the guyâs attempt at some Jimmy Buffet number a few songs ago. Rafe loved music. He loved it. Thatâs part of why karaoke was such an affront. Rafe played the piano; he was okay. His mom had put him in lessons right after kindergarten and it was the only thing he had stuck with until the end of high school. That was how he honored her memory.
Wait, kindergarten.
[Y/N] sat next to Rafe in kindergarten and early elementary. Holy fucking shit.
Rafe was a walking ad for Ritalin until he was about ten. Arguably, after that too. No one ever helped him out. He was also spoiled, he knew that. The kid talked out of turn, couldnât follow the classroom expectations, never sat still, and ended up with his green light getting downgraded to a yellow light by the end of everyday. The tantrums he would throw over it where earthshaking. It was exhausting. [Y/N] sat next to him because she was not disruptive. Miss Lisa, their kindergarten teacher had loved [Y/N]. She loved her not only because she was good kid, but because she talked back to Rafe. [Y/N] used her position as calm-girl-forced-to-sit-next-to-shitty-boy to her advantage. She tattled on him daily. Debatably, that made his behavior worse, but the pair had fun sometimes. Rafe hadnât thought about her in years.
[Y/N] wrapped up the song, trilling fine and dandy⊠Iâll be fine⊠over and over with the tinny backing track. He wished she could sing this song along with a guitar the way she deserved. Unexpectedly, Rafe found his hands applauding and his glass on the counter.
Quick as a flash, Rafe stood on unsteady feet and rushed towards the stage. [Y/N] rounded up her Irish coffee and pivoted towards her friends that clapped delightedly at her. Her hands were peeled away from her face now. Rafe almost smiled. Almost.
âHey ladies, can I steal [Y/N] here for a second?â Rafe hollered over the music as he slumped towards their party.
Wendyâs eyes lit up in immediate recognition. âRafe CameronâŠâ
âHi Wendy,â Rafe said effortlessly. âCongratulations, by the way. You look great.â Rafeâs hookups were getting married now, and he was going to wake up tomorrow single and hungover.
âThank you, hon. You look pretty good yourself⊠Please take her. Buy her another drink before we go. We need her loosened up a little.â Wendy giggled.
âHey!â [Y/N] protested. She was eying Rafe uncertainly. She was trying to place him the same way that he had her.
âPlease, ladies, next round on my tab. Congrats, seriously, Wendy,â Rafe said with a sleazy, false grin as a few of the women cheered. âIâll bring [Y/N] back in one piece.â Gently, Rafe placed a hand on her elbow and angled her away towards the bar. The two walked in relative quiet.
All [Y/N]âs friends giggled. Rafeâs force dimples dropped when they were out of the ladiesâ eyeline.
âExcuse me,â [Y/N] started. âNot tryinâ to be rude. Have we⊠Do I know you? I didnât catch your name andâŠâ She asked, staring intensely at Rafe. âIs this a setup, because Wendyâs always trying toââ
âShit, Iâm sorry,â Rafe cut in, stopping. He was drunk and forgot his manners. Great impression. Rafe cleared his throat and tried not to slur. âRafe Cameron. You probably donât remember me⊠I⊠Youâre [Y/N] [L/N], yeah? You sat beside me in, like, fucking kindergarten and stuff.â
[Y/N] eyes widened in recognition. âOh my god!â She gasped. âRafe! How are you? Oh my god, youâre so tall!â [Y/N] laughed happily. Her faced buzzed warmly from the alcohol.
Rafe nodded at her amused comment. âYeah, Iâve been busy since I was, yâknow, nine.â He snorted.
âYou transferred, right?â
âYeah, Saint Maryâs.â Rafe replied. His motherâs trust had paid for catholic school after she died. He transferred out around the time he was ten.
âI canât believe we never crossed paths again. You know Wendy from Saint Maryâs then?â
âYep, thatâs right,â Rafe paused. âCome on, lemme get you another drink. Youâre the reason I didnât fail first grade.â
[Y/N] smirked. âThatâs probably true. You were an awful student.â
âJesus Christ,â Rafe smirked. âWay to treat a guy buying you a drink,â he started his walk towards the bar, prompting [Y/N] to follow him. âYou got Baileyâs or Jameson in that thing?â
The girl looked down into her nearly empty mug. âJameson.â
âSmart girl.â Rafe said easily. [Y/N] blushed. Even drunk, Rafe didnât miss that expression on her face at those words. Almost too easy.
âWell, if youâre paying then tell the man to make it a double Irish too.â
âVery smart girl. I like the way you think.â
[Y/N] easily followed Rafe to the bar. The manâs broad shoulders slumped drunkenly as he cut through the crowd. When one was as large, imposing and beautiful as Rafe Cameron, crowds parted like the Red Sea. âSo, uh, how are you? Did you do the whole college thing, orâŠ?â [Y/N] asked broadly. She next to nothing about him. He wasnât even the kind of childhood friend to get added on Instagram.
College. That was the default question at their age. Rafe hated this question, but he couldnât let [Y/N] feel rejected for that question. âI mean, yeah. For a while. I was at Wofford for a year, but I never finished. I like what I do now, though.â
[Y/N] nodded. âAnd what exactly do you do?â
âReal estate development. I took over for my dad l when he passed.â
âOh, Iâm sorry to hear that.â
âYeah, we get by,â Rafe turned to the bartender, waving a hand for his attention. âAnother Makerâs Mark, neat, and a coffee with double Jameson. Put the anything else the bachelorette party orders on my tab.â Rafe said. He certainly didnât need another drink, but he really liked having something to do with his hands. Rafe would probably have less substance abuse-related issues if he knew how to conduct his body in public in some way that wasnât a poor impression of his father.
âVery good, Mr. Cameron.â
[Y/N] narrowed her eyes at Rafe. âBig spender⊠You that much of a regular that they know your name at the bar?â In her world, guys [Y/N]âs age didnât get called âMr.â anything anywhere by anyone. The guys she knew still drank shitty PBRs in punk clubs and had girlfriends they had nothing in common with. Rafeâs polish and pedigree didnât rub off even in such a state of intoxication.
Rafe didnât have a good excuse. The implication of [Y/N]âs statement was accurate. âSure,â he replied. He moved through the rest of his sentence like a gunshot to prevent an awkward conversation. âHey, whyâd you pick Hard Candy Christmas?â
âI didnât pick it. Wendy did.â
Rafe nodded slowly. âRight. Why did she pick it for you, then?â
âBecause itâs my favorite Christmas song.â
âItâs my favorite. Itâs probably half of the Smoky Mountainsâ favorite too. But why?â
âI didnât realize this was hardballââ
âPlease... I asked you a question about Dolly Parton. You sounded good.â Rafe responded. His drink was passed over the counter. He held it close to his chest and leaned his right elbow down to press it into the bar.
âUm, thanks. Itâs⊠I had shitty couple years. I sang that song everyday for months at a time, I think. Wendy and I would go for these drives with the top down and just⊠Belt that shit out. Makes the bad days better.â
Rafe half-smiled. âSo, year-round?â He said accusingly.
âThe song? Like, not at Christmas?â
âMhm.â
âWell, yeah. She says itâs like a Hard Candy Christmas, not that it is one. Thatâs grounds for year-round. Itâs so much more than a Christmas song.â [Y/N] bit back with a smirk. The bartender returned and placed another white coffee cup and saucer in front of [Y/N] with a nod. The girl slurped a sip down without cream or sugar. She barely made a pinched expression at what was obviously a strong drink. Rafe was moderately impressed. He liked that [Y/N] was drinking brown liquor in black coffee this late on a Friday while all of her friends held White Claws and Daiquiris,
âMy head hurts. This is the opposite of the Die Hardâs a Christmas movie thing.â Rafe jabbed.
âAnything can be a Christmas movie.â
âThen, so can a song.â
[Y/N] paused. âDamn.â she sighed. She wasnât sober enough to get her arguments straight.
Rafe didnât want to conversation to end. [Y/N] was the most intelligent person heâd spoken to all day. It wasnât saying much, but was noticeable. He asked another question. âWhatâs your favorite Christmas movie, if you think thatâs true?â
âAmerican Psycho.â
âWhat the fuck is wrong with you? Thatâs not aââ
âRewatch it. Not having this argument,â [Y/N] chided. The girl glanced over her shoulder at her friends. They were all staring at her and pretending they werenât. âListen Rafe, I appreciate the drink. It was really great to see you tonight. I gotta head back to Wendy now. Bachelorette party only happens once. If youâre lucky⊠But, hey, thank you againââ
âAsk me.â
âAsk you what?â [Y/N] asked. She had no idea where Rafe was taking this. Rafe pushed up the left sleeve of his brown sweater.
âWhat my favorite Christmas movie is.â
[Y/N] looked at him funny. âWhatâs your favorite Christmas movie?â
âEyes Wide Shut.â Rafe replied coyly.
âWhatâs wrong with me? Whatâs wrong with you?â [Y/N] smiled fully, finally. Rafe damn near smiled back. She took a small step away, gesturing to where her friends stood.
âCan I give you my card? Maybe we catch up sometime.â Rafe asked plainly.
âYeah, maybe!â
Rafe pulled his business card out of his wallet and extended it to [Y/N]. She looked down at it, cheekily saying: âLetâs see Paul Allenâs business cardâŠâ her eyes widened at the writing on the card. âCEO? Of a development company? THE development company on the island.â
âI told you I took over my dadâs business.â
âRafe, I⊠Iâm barely a grant writer at a 501-c3. How are you a CEO⊠Youâre⊠twenty-three?â
âTwenty-four two weeks ago.â
âHappy birthday,â [Y/N] said flatly. âWhatâs happening? Why are you talking to me?â
âBecause you helped me pass first grade. I thought I already said that.â Rafeâs eyes never left hers. They were so blue. Too blue. Too blue to be real. Rich people were too pretty.
[Y/N] took a very long sip of her coffee. âThatâs wild. Iâm sorry, but thatâs wild. You made me feel vastly inferior and Iâm the friend with my shit the most together.â [Y/N] told Rafe, with a smile on her face.
âI know you gotta get back. Iâm not gonna the asshole that kept the girls waiting, but call me. Listen, youâre pretty, so is your voice. We should catch up.â Rafe said. Was he asking her out? That was weird. That was weird, right?
Hesitantly, [Y/N] looked back at her friends again. They were too invested in her conversation with Rafe. Hopefully, they would all drink so much that they forgot it happened.
âDo you like karaoke, Rafe?â [Y/N] changed the subject.
âI hate it.â He replied instantly.
âWhy are you here?â
Rafe gestured with his glass to where Topper and Ruthie were making out. âThey gave me a ride. And you donât seem too keen about it either.â He said with a shrug.
[Y/N] couldnât figure out what Rafeâs game was. He had turned from an unsettling child to a freakish adult. He was blunt and brisk, and either frustratingly honest or an alarmingly good liar. Maybe both. She stared up at him.
âWhat?â
âWhat?â Rafe raised an eyebrow.
âOkay, Iâm gonna go. It was good to see you. Thanks for the drinks,â [Y/N] took a step back. She started to walk away slightly, still facing Rafe. A looked of what could be interrupted as self-loathing crossed Rafeâs face. He didnât bullshit enough with her during the conversation to be perceived as likable, and she was leaving. Of course. Nobody liked Rafe when they actually knew Rafe. [Y/N] stopped, thinking. âRafe?â
âYeah?â His eyes slid back to her.
âCan you do something for me?â
âMaybe?â
He was going to say no, but it would serve as a litmus test for what kind of man Rafe was. It would help [Y/N] sleep easier to know what kind of bullet she dodged by losing Rafeâs business card after tonight. âOkay, we have a scavenger hunt thing for the party. Itâs stupid. One of those⊠Do X number of shots, get someone to give you a BLANK, take a picture of three of you doing⊠whatever. Yâknow?â
âSure, yeah. What are you asking?â
âOne of the items on the list is Maid of Honor and a stranger accomplish a task sheâll regret tomorrow. Like I said, itâs a trashy fuckinâ list.â
âAre you asking me to hookup with you, orâŠâ
âWorse. Do you know the song Donât Go Breaking My Heart byââ
âAbsolutely notââ
âLet me finish. I said do you know the song Donât Goââ
âI donât do karaoke.â Rafe said forcefully.
âDo you want to go out on a date with me, or not?â
Rafe was stunned silent. His mind worked overtime. He suddenly felt extremely sober, in spite of his drunkenness. He sucked his teeth.
âI donât do Elton John. Sorry.â He muttered finally.
[Y/N] nodded, knowingly. It was a setup anyway. She couldnât be disappointed. She knew heâd refuse and she could leave knowing she had made the right choice ditching him. âThatâs aâright. Maybe some otherââ
âBut, if you really want me to do this, letâs at least stick to the Christmas thing youâve got going here.â
âYou donât look very⊠holly jolly.â
âHo, ho, ho,â he deadpanned. Rafe was the strangest combination. âStop givinâ me grief here. Your favorite Christmas movie is American Psycho. Letâs do Baby, Itâs Cold Outsideââ
âWhoa, waaaay too rapey.â [Y/N] protested.
âAmerican. Psycho. How is that songââ
âWait, do you know Faââ
âFairytale of New York?â Rafe finished.
âYou know it?â
âMy familyâs Irish Catholic.â
They both stood still and looked at each other. Well, Rafe stood as still as he could, but swayed a little on his feet. He wasnât thinking clearly. Why was he agreeing to this?
For as manipulative as Rafe Cameron could be, he was effortless to play for validation and a pretty pair of eyes looking back at him.
Everyone leaves eventually, Rafe reminded himself. His mouth and his brain were not in agreement. Rafe had lost control of his body as he blindly followed [Y/N] to sign up for the next karaoke slot.
They passed Topper and Rafe held onto his glass like an anchor. He should have switched to beer. Why did he have another bourbon? Topper pulled his face away from Ruthie long enough to look at Rafe as if to say what the fuck are you doing? without any words. Rafe grimaced at Topper, barring his teeth slightly in response.
Rafe leaned in to [Y/N]âs ear and clumsily pushed her hair back. âIâm not a singer⊠This isnât gonna be good.â He whispered. Chills crept up [Y/N]âs spine at the sensation of his breath. He knew his way around rhythm and music theory. Rafe was an asshole about music, actually. Jazz, classical, whatever. It was his secret no one else got to have. Itâs not his fault that most of the motherfuckers he hung out with only listened to guys with the word âyungâ in front of their names. Still, all of that musicality couldnât make him a singer.
âItâs karaoke.â [Y/N] said like it was obvious. She dragged Rafe towards the stage. âYouâre so serious⊠Stop frowning; youâre gonna get lines on your face. Weâre both gonna suck. I wouldnât make you do this if it wasnât for Wendy anyway. Promise.â
âThis is so dumb; this better be some fucking dateâŠâ
[Y/N] pried, with difficulty, the rocks glass out of Rafeâs fingers and set it with her mug on a tabletop by the stage. As she pulled him up to a microphone, she said: âYou know the words. Sing the damn song.â
And as the track started to play, and [Y/N] stupid friends all cheered, Rafe slurred the words he knew from every drunken family Christmas party heâd ever had. And he smiled. Just a little.









