RMH

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Jules of Nature

Kaledo Art
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Peter Solarz
Claire Keane

@theartofmadeline
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
NASA

PR's Tumblrdome
Cosimo Galluzzi

Janaina Medeiros

oozey mess
will byers stan first human second

roma★
d e v o n

tannertan36
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

titsay
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@thepoorballadeer
(to the tone of creep by radiohead) but i'm asleep. on mypillow
the foreboding sense of doom? oh yeah i know that one. just double check you have your wallet, keys and some chapstick, works every time
was expecting to reblog this with a tongue-in-cheek reply to the many people saying "this didn't fix me :(" but somehow not a single person in the notes is disagreeing. everyone's just nodding their heads thoughtfully bc yeah that's how you deal with the Foreboding Sense Of Doom, that's good protocol
Do the Doorway Macarena: pat yourself down repeatedly to the tune of your panicking soul.
DOORWAY MACARENA
forced love confessions are whatever but forced hate confessions make me foam and froth at the mouth. show me someone visibly tormented by their own catharsis, wracked with the shame of losing a fight with themself. show me someone who leans in and twists the hand clutching the knife buried to the hilt inside them. cross the wires of desire and disgust with me.
+ don't forget to have them both throw up afterwards also
woo i am such a fan of dramatic plants. just prissy fucking plantlife, be it unreasonable or implacable or ostentatious. plants, man
u know what yeah, let’s talk about weird nonsense plants
1. Living Stones
these plants imitate rocks. who does that?
imagine deciding to straight up evolve into rocks as a defense mechanism. i had a whole rant planned but now i’m remembering that i have, in the past, on multiple occasions, daydreamed about being a rock. like that has been a recurring theme in my rich inner fantasy life. i would not forsake the opportunity to evolve into a stone.
2. Hooker’s Lips
ostentatious. flamboyant. vulgar. garish. randy. dare i say whorish? yes. this plant is whorish.
pucker up you hussy
3. Hoya Hearts
overused trope. lacks subtlety and creativity. truly, they just went with the first thought to pop in their head, no brainstorming involved. “ho ho ho i’m just gonna grow into a fucking HEART, that’ll show em!” Needy & basic bitch. looks cute on a desk
4. Lifesaver Plants
manages to be both psychedelic and disapproving. reminiscent of a prudish great aunt–but like, one who did a lot of LSD in the 70s. evidence of an alien lifeform who crash landed and then decided, fuck it, i’m gonna rent a one-story in the midwest and decorate it with vintage wood paneling & floral upholstery. probably smells like stale weed and glass ashtrays
5. Happy Alien Flowers
yes that is their NAME. sort of anticlimactic, but take a gander:
they are absolute sluts for drama, as demonstrated by the little hussies pictured above are YELLING AT ME. they bring to mind seagulls engaged in a Shakespearean blood feud. this flowers have committed aggravated manslaughter and probably got away with it too.
6. Bat Plant
aka Cat’s Whiskers aka Devil Flower. how fucking emo is that??? this plant listens to mcr and is probably the gay cousin. they never got the hang of eyeliner but that doesn’t stop them from trying, bless em. their impetuous devil-may-care persona is hindered by their crippling social anxiety. i’m immensely fond of this plant. they’ll come into their own once they graduate and move away from college, but in the mean time they sit with the tech crew at lunch. you go little Bat Plant!
7. Dancing Plants
total band kids. also called Semaphore Plants, bc they look like they’re trying to flag down a plane. nifty fuckers
in conclusion, three cheers for whiny, namby-pamby, scatterbrained plantlife
so you’ll reblog THIS and my Non-Comprehensive List of Cursed Bird That Piss Me Off, but Whimsical Creatures Failing To Tempt Me Into The Ocean is where tumblr draws the line huh
I am absolutely delighted to show you this orchid the ‘Naked Man’. It’s an orchid native to the Mediterranean and it looks like a lil dude with a tiny penis
PROPORTIONALLY SPEAKING
can't stop thinking about how hysterical project hail mary would be from rocky's pov when you consider that, by eridian standards, basic human functioning is simultaneously an incredibly hostile and violently perverted body horror fetish nightmare. imagine you make first contact with an alien and it's an apex predator with an obscene number of orifices, made up mostly of toxic substances that it oozes constantly from said orifices, thrives in an unforgivingly cold and suffocating atmosphere, is highly motivated by searching for its next meal + consumes its food publicly in violation of your society's main taboo, and is capable of rapidly transitioning from vulnerable in sleep to alert and in full possession of its faculties at the slightest change in stimuli. grace is in a heartwarming scifi buddy comedy and meanwhile rocky is bonded with and planning on bringing home his species' equivalent of the xenomorph.
POV you're welcoming home your planet's heroic saviours
*sighs* we sent four astronauts up and four came back huh
Were you expecting more?
five was the bare minimum for me
oh well. there's still the moon ghosts
good night & sweet dreams to people who haven’t gotten that tattoo yet, people wearing sweaters even if it’s still too warm, people w/ crooked noses, teenagers who don’t know yet how much better things will be, people who prefer not to use emojis bc the eyes look like they’re watching u from any angle, anyone who uses mouthwash bc brushing every night is hard, people who are kind when society tells them kindness is unnecessary, people who use subtitles, anyone who did that one specific ritual i TOLD you not to do i TOLD you the invocation would have dire consequences and now LOOK at the state of the world, what have you done sweet jesus what have you done, people who foster pets, and that one lady i made out with during a 2018 halloween party who told me i had “tiny eyes but they see too many things” and then kissed my nose before wandering off to find a bathroom. i hope you all get a good night’s sleep, please know i am watching
I’m sORRY I THOUGHT IT WAS FOR A DEMON BF, OK????
when has a forbidden archaic ritual EVER gotten you a demon boyfriend??????? when has that ever happened??????
sexualising a blade sliding between the gaps in plate armour
yes it's obviously penetrative imagery but it's also + more importantly about the intoxicating, terrifying helplessness of being violently reminded of the limitations of your attempts to defeat your own vulnerability
creating a series that acronyms to NSFW so that nobody can tag shit
Hotel Transylvania
im sorry the what
this one
the current meme is based on the following which is based on that one
which i assume is from tumblr based on how one of the panels is lifted from that "its ok i am a lesbo" picture
So the timeline is
- I am lesbo
- I'm stuff
- i am lesbo x I'm stuff fusion
- transfem Jonathan and transmasc mavis
as far as anyone can tell this is the original “I am a lesbo” image, for the record
I'm sobbing oh my god
I heard...now don't shoot the messenger but this is the og I am gay tho
Why the fuck is it woody and bolt
WHY THE FUCK IS IT WOODY AND BOLT
Wait why does Dracula refer Joanne as *his* daughter?
if your child marries someone, that partner becomes your daughter-in-law or son-in-law.
There is
So much going on here
This is like an archeological dig site but the philosophers are still alive and talking
does anyone remember law4kids
like this kids’ website that had these shitty webcomics and animations telling them all about DA LAW
i mean this shit was hilarious even by itself
BUT THEN PEOPLE STARTED MAKING PARODIES
AND THEY JUST KEPT COMING
This one was always my favorite:
please be careful with these, they’re antiques
i literally said “even the cop gets in trouble” like, yesterday
got an idea for a song it’s called moonsetter
hitting play like
Oh right that’s toby fox