i gave a bug cpr and it worked. @thereisdefinitelyawordforthat - Tumblr Blog

Wild Dogs see a Domesticated Dog

African wild dogs are one of my favorite animals. Those huge round circle ears and tricolored coats. I love you African wild dogs

bunjywunjy

HEY. HEY. HOW DID YOU GET OUT??? HEY-

timefortigers

dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog? dog?

that1nkyone

vonkarmic

i think taylor swift wishes she was bisexual because she knows it would make her slightly more money. whereas sabrina carpenter wishes she was bisexual so she could have sex with someone who looks exactly like herself. and ariana grande wishes she was bisexual because she did too many designer drugs on the set of wicked and now she has kin memories of being glinda for real

ijaazat

summer

1. make a syllabus for yourself - books, media, places, recipes

2. complete 40% of it

3. eat every fruit u can

gutsygills

mold pisses me off so much

oh you have to eat your produce the moment it leaves the store or the fuckin Hungering Dust will get it. and. poison your food

tobiasdrake

I ran into this post years ago and to be honest, it has completely reoriented the way I engage with food.

Like. I’ve always sorta understood that things grow moldy or stale or sour or such if left out, but I never really internalized it in a meaningful way.

But now I’m just like.

Yeah. The hungering dust. There exists omnivorous dust in the air that will eat my food if I don’t.

Those bagels have been sitting there for a week. Are we going to eat them soon or are we leaving them for the hungering dust?

Pizza’s been sitting out on the counter for an hour. Everyone’s enjoying the pizza, but if we don’t want “everyone” to include the hungering dust then we should probably put it away soon.

That’s just. That’s how food works to me now. There exists an invisible predator in the air that hungers for your yummies, and it will not hesitate to eat your food if you don’t make the effort to protect and preserve it. And eat what can’t be preserved before the dust can.

Life-changing.

the-missing-number

food doesn’t actually “go bad”, it just gets eaten by something else first

pigeon-butch

your muscles being pleasantly sore after exercise is such a nice incentive I can see why they patched that in. the forced regular logins to avoid losing progress however are a predatory practice and deserve nothing but scorn.

roundtop

got a giant and i mean GIANT fresh-squeezed strawberry lemonade at the farmer's market today. i'm talking like a full quart with a straw in it. very delicious. five dollars. nice. as i was leaving, laden with vegetables, a young man waved at me and asked where i had acquired my immense beverage. and after i pointed him toward the stall and informed him of the various prices and flavors, he looked toward the sky, basketball shorts flapping in the breeze, and bellowed to the heavens, "oh i am gonna SLUUUUUUUURP that." happy slurp that saturday everyone.

cheaphalloweencostume

my least favorite literary smut turn of phrase is when a guy is like “im gonna ruin this pussy” “im gonna wreck this pussy for anyone else” like stop.. thats not yours…!

goofda

“Imma destroy that pussy” my friend 😔

cheaphalloweencostume

THE HELL YOU WILL!!!!!!!!

fizzysgayassposting

clark devouring himself

hoodiehorizon

Me the first half of The Backrooms: "oh I get it. He's a down on his luck failed architect and even more failed furniture store owner who's trying to better himself. He'll probably be fascinated with the furniture/architecture of the backrooms and start selling the items there for money + notoriety. And eventually he'll go deeper and deeper to get more and more items until he gets trapped and encounters The Horrors. A classic tale of hubris :) "

Me the second half of the backrooms:

felineoccultist

Backrooms movie spoilers without context:

cleaverqueer

petition to change LGBT to DFTQ (Dykes Faggots Trannies and Queers, naturally)

cleaverqueer

AMENDED

cleaverqueer

happy pride everyone

asteroidtroglodyte

Nature Documentary: these deep sea creatures can withstand crushing pressures of thousands of pounds per square inch!

Me: they’re not withstanding a goddamn thing. The pressure is a part of them. Their interiors and exteriors are equalized. Just because your respiratory system is built around a pair of fragile poppable bubbles-

asteroidtroglodyte

Your tags pass Peer Review

Benthic Organism: golly I sure do love metabolizing things slowly and efficiently

Benthic Organism: those are VERY bright lights

Benthic Organism: oh boy we’re going up

Benthic Organism: m y E n z y m e s

asteroidtroglodyte

God I wish

Me, posting, allegedly:

Or actually probably one of these guys:

Shmooooovement

treeen

[ID: Hashtags have been removed for ease of reading in the tags.

[ID 1: Screenshot of tags reading:

to be briefly annoying: there is mechanically withstanding and then there is adapting

the mechanical pressures are equalized but that means adaptations to pressure need to happen inside the organism's biochemistry and there are actually some pretty substantial enzymatic adaptations needed!

enzyme folding is a thermodynamic activity and the energy states change at different pressures cause gibbs is a function of pressure

we don't usually think about it bc surface life has essentially no pressure gradients but iirc pressure-adapted life has enzymes that simply do not function as well at one bar

kind of wild to think about imo.

like yeah the mechanical structure of the organism doesn't need to withstand the pressure but the enzyme folding process and reaction sites still sure do!"

End ID 1]

[ID 2: Tags reading: "op are you a deep sea creature".

End ID 2]

[ID 3: Tags reading: "posts that read like they were written by cephalopods".

End ID 3]

[ID 4: A gif of a brown octopus sitting at a desk, hitting several things with its appendage.

End ID 4]

[ID 5, 6 & 7: 3 gifs of feather stars, one red, one green, one black and white. They look like a mass of feather-like tentacles.

End ID 5, 6 & 7]

End ID]

asteroidtroglodyte

So true!

Additional pet peeve: “King of the Deep”

Since when are Sharks Catholic?

asteroidtroglodyte

Hopefully your tags can handle the pressure difference from being Ascended

Also, speaking of Deep Sea Creatures modifying their metabolisms to adapt to their environment:

Greenland shark - Wikipedia

Behold! An Ice Elemental!

wordfather

all i want is to get hellsitegeneticsed. i want to know what kind of creature my post is. god i want it to be something cool sooooooooo bad do you think they have the genetic code for werewolves

hellsitegenetics

String identified: aattgttgtcattatcattgattttgcattatgtcc

Closest match: fucking badass werewolf Common name: hell yeahhhh

wordfather

so this is what it's like to be god's favorite

eradacted

It may not be that deep, but I have a shovel and I will make it as deep as I want.

asteroidtroglodyte

High key what House of Leaves is meta about

eradacted

I know not what House of Leaves is but I wholeheartedly trust your comparison and I shall take it as fact!

asteroidtroglodyte

House of Leaves is a book about a man trying to explore the inside of his new home, which proves substantially more difficult than should be possible, due to its non-Euclidean dimensions.

Except that House of Leaves is actually about a documentary about a man trying to explore the inside of his new home, which proves impossible to document properly, due to its non-Euclidean dimensions.

Except that House of Leaves is actually about an academic paper, which itself is about an alleged documentary about an alleged non-Euclidean home, but none of this can be verified.

Except that House of Leaves is just, like, this fucking stack of papers I found in this old dead guy’s apartment, and, like, I don’t even know if its his or what because like both his eyes were gone and he didn’t have any degrees or anything. I tried asking my friend from the tattoo shop about it but she was fixing up this thumper tattoo right above a girl’s pussy the whole time we were talking; like Thumper from Bambi, and I’m not gonna lie man I was pretty distracted and I just couldn’t [XXXXS XXXX XXXX. XXXX XXXX XXX X XXX XX XXXXXXX XXXXXX XX XXXX XX XXXXXX XXXX XXX]^*

———

* Editor’s Note: House of Leaves is a metatextual examination of the ability for a minor inconsistency in measurement, which might have been ignored by a normal person, to cause an all-consuming obsession spiral in the sort of person who is academically trained, obsessed with documentation, or overtly pedantic, and-

“Johnny, please, I’m your Mother; I know I have a lot to apologize for but I can’t, not unless you return my letters; are you even getting my letters? I send one every week you know, but I think that nurse keeps them from you, keeps you from getting my letters, because I know, I know my sweet Johnny would never leave his poor old mother rotting away by herself in this horrible drafty ward if he was getting his mother’s letters, would you, sweet boy? I know she’s stealing my letters from you, she’s always touching my things, even though they haven’t moved I know she’s touching them I know she keeps you from me I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know [there’s a limit to what you can know. Some folks bump up against that limit and bounce right off and keep swimming, and some folks, well. Some folks SPLAT]I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know [they just gotta keep digging away at it. Even when it’s not that deep, they just… grab a shovel and keep digging. Lord knows what motivates them. A kind of Madness I suppose. Some folks find GOD in that madness. Not much of a believer myself]I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know

I know

I know you’ll visit me for Mother’s Day, won’t you?

🧿

*Editor’s Note: he did not