the chemicals in our brain compel us to make dangerous decisions. dangerous yet thrilling. thrilling because dangerous.
the thunder coursing through our veins rips us away from childhood into the unknown.
we're so invested in our moments of love and hope and anger that we forget that the adults we look down on felt the same unbearing weight of nothingness. they too felt youth at their fingertips. their minds were just as ours, at war.
we feel no one gets it. gets the dizziness and the numbness and the fear and restlessness. but look at your parents, your older siblings, or the stranger sitting across you on the train. look at them and know that they too went through the crumbling loneliness and powerlessness of knowing too much and being too young.
they're just scarred kids who made it out.
we tend to think of scars as ugly and embarrassing, something that needs to stay hidden and something that needs to be forgotten. but what are scars if not a reminder of a memory that's important enough for you to be imprinted on you forever? they never go away.
maybe everything in this world IS doomed and maybe the boy you're thinking about doesn't care and maybe you die a little every summer and you want to cry everytime you see him. but you forget.
adults too felt abandoned and unsafe and they couldn't even think straight. they didn't think what's coming in front of them would be scary because they didn't know if they were going to make it.
but they too, felt magic in their bones. they felt the power to change the world.