Lord Of The Things

Bask in my awkwardness

[troyes-lip-ring]

Visit Original Link

[ayetroyler]

I AM FUKCING LOSING MY MIND

[sugarless-gum]

[towritelesbiansonherarms]

[kyary]

would you like to buy some turnips

[fuckoffstraightpeople-blog]

i have so many thin friends who eat shit and don’t exercise ever and are probably rotting inside but no one says shit about their health so let’s stop pretending it’s fat people’s health you’re bothered about you transparent motherfuckers 

[dysn0mia]

when I was a heroin addict I lost a significant amount of weight, one day I took my sweatshirt off around a friend whom I never really liked that much and she just:

*gasp* “You lost so much weight! I’m so jealous, your tummy is so flat! you look so HEALTHY!”

I SHIT YOU NOT SHE SAID I LOOKED HEALTHY

I WAS ADDICTED TO HEROIN

[devonhale]

me, wearing a flannel: I’m Wearing This Because I’m Not Straight

[astrangertomykin]

My medieval servant boy has gone missing. I’ll just use Google to see if I can find him.

[astrangertomykin]

Oh bother.

[dggeoff-deactivated20161128]

im deleting this fucking website

[best-chance-deactivated20161213]

It took me a minute

[dragonbronze-blog]

I have never laughed this hard in all my life this is just perfect.

[toshio]

having thick ass hair is such a pain i just want smooth thin silky beautiful hair that waves in the wind while the sun shines elegantly in the background

[toshio]

disclaimer: i do not have hair on my ass. i was referring to hair on my head, thanks

[toshio]

enough

[delusioners]

My life is just stress and good music

[awesomedorkwad]

Visit Original Link

If you didn’t love this song, you’re a liar

[joshpeck]

this is iconic

[pumpkin-spiced-semen]

[thisusernameisclaimedbythelord]

me at night: tomorrow i'm gonna wake up early and start with a run and then i'm gonna go over my notes and drink a super healthy protein shake and eat fruit and work on ME i'm gonna dress so nice and be extra kind and study hard tomorrow i am gonna OWN this :)

me in the morning: no.

[liberatingthismind]

Have a history teacher explain this if they can.

Abraham Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846. John F. Kennedy was elected to Congress in 1946.

  Abraham Lincoln was elected President in 1860. John F. Kennedy was elected President in 1960. Both were particularly concerned with civil rights. Both wives lost a child while living in the White House. Both Presidents were shot on a Friday. Both Presidents were shot in the head. Now it gets really weird. Lincoln’s secretary was named Kennedy. Kennedy’s Secretary was named Lincoln. Both were assassinated by Southerners. Both were succeeded by Southerners named Johnson. Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808. Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908. John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839. Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939. Both assassins were known by their three names. Both names are composed of fifteen letters. Now hang on to your seat. Lincoln was shot at the theater named “Ford.” Kennedy was shot in a car called “Lincoln” made by “Ford.” Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials. And here’s the “kicker”: A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland. A week before Kennedy was shot, he was with Marilyn Monroe.

  AND……………….: Lincoln was shot in a theater and the assassin ran to a warehouse… Kennedy was shot from a warehouse and the assassin ran to a theater…

  I saw this had to share just in case anyone did not know.

[twinkle-twinkle-little-fuck]

uterus during period: Ohmygod I’m so embarrassed. I thought we were having a baby. DONT LOOK AT THIS! *rips down baby wallpaper* PLEASE JUST IGNORE THIS! *tears apart baby room* LETS PRETEND THIS NEVER HAPPENED.

[i-do-it-for-the-lesbians-deacti]

Are you a Dom or sub?

I love dominos and subway but it really just depends on the night and what I’m feelin

[parisjemm]

I just want a cute girlfriend who will sit on my lap at parties and on my face in the bedroom.

[honeyyheroine]

Lord you’d be the perfect boyfriend

[parisjemm]

Well I’m a woman so probably not

[westernkanye]

[thisusernameisclaimedbythelord]

david cameron, looking at tomorrow's daily mail: why must u kinkshame me in my own tory press