What Are You Looking At?

Меня́ зову́т Elizabeth. 25 years of madness, mayhem, bad jokes, and worse decisions. check it or whatev.

[throughthelookingglass5311]

Tfw you actually high-key want to die but you don't want to tell anyone because you don't want to worry your friends & you also don't want them to stop you if you decide to go for it.

[archosaur-automaton]

Crabs amaze me. They’re the perfect life form, a tank made of legs and living hate-armor. It’s not just about their physicality, though; it’s the soul of the crab. See, no crab in the bottomless history of the sea has ever questioned itself, doubted itself, worried, or been afraid. A crab is pure motion. A crab is pure id and unrelenting forward force. Crabs invented the word violence and they will scuttle on the surface of the world while the red giant of Sol creeps closer to devour everywhere we’ve ever known. They will look into the sky and clack their claws and there will be no fear. 

[debris-hime]

[archosaur-automaton]

Excuse me how the fuck did you create the perfect illustration for what I was trying to express

[dragonzzilla]

There were once three brothers who desired the same woman. Each of the brothers wanted to win her heart, so each of them went out and found a gift.

The first brother presented a bundle of rare flowers. “I saw these and thought of you, as you are both beautiful.”

But the woman turned him down. “You are most flattering, but beauty is fleeting. These flowers will not remain beautiful forever, and nor shall I. That you thought first of my beauty is telling, and you would not make a good husband.”

The second brother presented a fresh kill. “I have slain this beast as proof of my prowess. So long as you are my wife, you shall not want for food or warm pelts.”

But the woman turned him down. “You are indeed skilled, but there is pride in your heart. That you thought first of me as a possession is telling, and you would not make a good husband.”

The third brother presented a knife. “I made this for you. It is simple and unadorned, but I can vouch for its edge. It is a tool and a promise. You can use it to defend yourself, and I ever become a threat, then I can only blame myself.”

The woman, nodding, accepted his gift. “You are humble, and acknowledge that things may change between us. That you give me the means to succeed, come what may, is telling, and you would make a good husband.”

She married the third brother, and for the time they remained together, they had more good times than bad, until they parted amicably. 

—Traditional orc parable, explaining why knives are a customary gift in orcish courting rituals

[anxietyproblem]

[mapsontheweb]

US Elevation.

by @cstats1

[ginger-ale-official]

man the Appalachian mountains really aren’t shit huh

[archosaur-automaton]

The Rockies are new, young and virile and fresh from the Laramide orogeny, tall and lanky teenagers on the geological scale. the Appalachian mountains are old, formed hundreds of millions of years ago before dinosaurs walked the Earth. They are ancients, elders, witnesses to half a billion years of life coming and going. To be tall is not a virtue. To be small is not a sin. The Appalachians are eroding under the weight of time, slowly shrinking and returning to the Earth from which they sprang. Appreciate them while they are still here.

[beabaseball]

I do want to say real quick again about the age of the Appalachians…

They said “before dinosaurs,” but we have a cave here that began forming between 450 million to 550 million years ago.

There are no bones in that cave. No fossils. No nothing.

That’s because this cave began forming before bones existed on land, and had only just started to exist in the ocean. Shellfish hadn’t evolved yet. Limestone, which forms many caves, was just starting to become a more prevalent rock.

The mountains aren’t older than dinosaurs. They are older than bones.

[jumpingjacktrash]

see that little lump up at the top of minnesota? the sawtooth mountains? so small most places would just call them hills?

those are over a billion years old.

that’s why they’re so small. they’re the last ancient remnants of a lava flow 5 miles thick. the lava didn’t kill any dinosaurs. or any fish. or any animals at all. because there were no animals. you know what there was?

algae.

those mountains were 5 miles tall when the most advanced life on earth was algae.

so i’m just gonna go ahead and keep calling them mountains, even though all you need to climb them is hiking shoes and a nice afternoon. because a place where you can crouch down and touch basalt that was lava before leaves were invented deserves some respect.

[bumblebeerror]

The earth is unfathomably ancient, and you garner no love from her when you insult her eldest children.

[dryad-of-the-dogwood]

If you were born in the Appalachians, you probably have an idea of how old they are, conscious or not. It comes from the stories passed down in whispers of places you should never go at night or on a full moon, of spirits older than humanity, of deer that aren’t quite deer but something older trying to look like one. They rose long before we did and they will watch through the fog as we fall.

[whitepeopletwitter]

[lastoneout]

Op is denying us the fucking golden replies to this tweet omg

[nightonblogmountain]

When i had breast reduction surgery, i got into the OR and got put on this table that looked like a flat crucifix (arms out so they could get to the girls), and i said ‘god, don’t nail me down’

they put the mask on my face and the nurse said ‘no jesus treatment today’

and the last thing i said to her was ‘jesus with some big ass titties’ and then passed out. 

[bob-belcher]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[pseudodesigner]

[sameboot]

This is such an important and genuinely terrifying post. I could completely go off on the rise of anti-science, but for now I’ll just add: it isn’t just boomers that get deceived. This is a warning to all of us.

Pay ATTENTION to what you are being told. If you think you cannot be deceived, you leave yourself open to deception. Question, doubt, research research research. Learn about your personal biases, dig up any subconscious cognitive dissonance. Keep an eye on your mind.

[oldmanyellsatcloud]

It needs to be stressed that biases, not a lack of intelligence, is very much the issue here. Being aware of the need to fact check yourself is key: Intelligence won’t protect you from bad or unhealthy mental states, or keep you safe from cults of any sort. Intelligence will just make it easier for you to rationalize and attempt to justify the malformed tools you’ve taken/been given to yourself and others. You need to be wise enough to challenge yourself.

[gardenofroseandthorn]

As a cult survivor, this is lethally accurate.

[muppethole-deactivated20240312]

Denver Zoo and its gay lorikeets said fuck homophobes happy Pride

[agentduckorico]

Homophobes: u mean they act like brothers

Denver Zoo: they’re fucking, lorie.

[100493503004422]

I feel FATIGUED like send her to the seaside for her health type fatigue

[artist-magritte-deactivated2020]

Time transfixed via Rene Magritte

Size: 146x97 cm Medium: oil, canvas

[o6eiyrskb4hg7rix8hih-deactivate]

dumb ass accidentally painted a train instead of a fire

[o6eiyrskb4hg7rix8hih-deactivate]

rene magritte has talent but this is a rookie mistake

[thecureinorange-deactivated2021]

hate 2 say it but british ppl had the right idea with saying whats all this then. like literally whats all this then

[windmill-ghost]

I’ve seen people pass around the “hold up, I’m googlin’ something” image but it cropped out the part where he was googling “how many guys can one guy take”

[windmill-ghost]

this page, in isolation, is possibly the funniest thing i have seen in any manga

[evilspice]

why is bryan cranston such a bad bitch in malcolm in the middle why did they just have him in a wet tshirt & denim booty shorts washing a porsche please don’t make me act up

[evilspice]

the only white boy summer

[squareallworthy]

Do kids today even understand why podcasts are called podcasts?

[squareallworthy]

Well, you see, kids, almost twenty years ago Apple produced a portable audio player called – wait, I need to go back further.

[squareallworthy]

Okay, so in the 20th century, the new inventions of radio and television were known as broadcast media – no, wait, that’s not really the start either –

[squareallworthy]

Broadcasting originally refers to throwing, or casting, handfuls of seeds onto prepared ground, typically used with grain crops, which, uh –

[squareallworthy]

– the Agrucultural Revoution, which begain circa 10,000 BC in the Levant, was when humans began preserving seeds for replanting –

[tooquirkytolose]

There’s A Princess In A Tower..

[tooquirkytolose]

monsterfucker knight to the rescue

[throughthelookingglass5311]

I got put in FB jail for attempting to reply to this with:

"Josh Sloop - Nope. I'm really trying to shame someone for insinuating that someone who is late on their rent during a global pandemic is "making excuses" or doesn't work hard enough.

You don't know what other people are going through. Maybe don't be a condescending twat."

I didn't even call anyone a condescending twat. I said DON'T be a condescending twat.

Now fb is being a condescending twat.