Shoot The Devil

(he / they) | 30+ | "To be dominated by me is not as bad for human pride as to be dominated by others of your species."

[thethreemustyfears]

Ladies and gentlemen, Gay Blade

[fangorn-forest]

summer sufferers poll: would you rather have…

the ability to repel all bugs so they can’t touch/bite/sting you

the ability to always be at a comfortable temperature while outside

no chafing ever again

Remaining time: 5 days 14 hours

[probuccalfat]

dead serious normalize having an average boring ass life where you have enough to meet your needs we do not need to be remarkable we just need to be alive

[glowcowboy]

she 🫪 on my 🫪 till i 🫪

[astraldrake]

“Perhaps you are still out there. If this reaches you, I would very much like to speak with you, to hear your theories in your own words.” - The Speaker

[tieflinglich]

in the effort to fix the problem of my room being hot to a genuinely unhealthy level with nothing i do changing it, i managed to break my standing fan.

[aesths-deactivated20220604]

[viralfrog]

[dragongirlbunny]

[tieflinglich]

i have three fans running and i’m sitting in front of an open window and it’s still 80 degrees. i can feel my face heating up and when i look in the mirror i am pink.

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Me, tears streaming down my face, sobbing, as I stare at the stars: it’s just so beautiful

The medieval peasant I went back in time to give a bag of Doritos to, concerned: what terrible and powerful sorcerers they must have in your age, to be able to veil the vault of heaven itself from view, as you say

Me, sniffling: I didn’t realize, I can’t, it’s so much, I, I… are the chips good, at least?

Medieval peasant, trying to make me feel better: they’re… magical, strange traveler

[elexecution]

they need to invent the opposite of an nda called an fda where u have to tell everyone everything

[ilovedirt]

subpoena

[virtualgirladvance]

tumblr

[earhartsease]

alcohol

[beltsquid]

war thunder forums

[moghedien]

I feel like I need to share this because idk if Europeans are familiar with the presence of Aldi in the US, but at least especially in my area they’ve been growing a lot recently. Like Aldi bought out some local failing grocery chains where I live (Louisiana) and have opened Aldis in all these somewhat rural communities and small towns, which for the record I’m fine with

But as a result of this they are advertising a lot more in my area and also in many cases, the people in these areas have never been confronted with Aldi or any European grocery store. So the ads that Aldi is pushing out to its new US customer base feature a cowboy shopping at Aldi who is explaining to new Aldi customers how Aldi works. Like this cowboy is explaining you gotta put a quarter in the shopping cart and why there are very little name brands. A cowboy is how they want to reach their American customer base. They gave us a cowboy

[moghedien]

Here he is, the Aldi Cowboy

[quasi-normalcy]

Two indy horror movies are now outperforming a Star Wars flick at the summer box office; truly the Old Gods are dead.

[quasi-normalcy]

I feel like we're all just starved for novelty

[themoonandmyman]

I haven’t said anything interesting in a long while. this will continue

[perception-filter]

it is so fucked up how thumbs up emoji is seen as passive aggressive

[perception-filter]

i love thumbs up… you have to be nice to her you can’t call her passive aggressive she’s literally niceys. 👍 ok?

[werewolfetone]

It kind of fucks with me that somebody killed ötzi the iceman because ötzi himself is like whatever but the silent presence of human hands that drew back the string of the bow that shot the arrow that killed him is crazy. the idea that there were various people involved in that situation and while one of them has had his last hours painstakingly reconstructed and studied to no end, the others now only exist insofar that an arrowhead had to get into his shoulder somehow. imagine killing someone and then suddenly your entire existence is only a vague shadow implied by the fact that you killed them. much to consider

[werewolfetone]

Testing the mummified bone marrow of ötzi to figure out his ancestry whole time there’s definitely another person, maybe more than one, standing in the room with us but I can never see or speak to them because I only know them through the assurance that they were there too in the form of one single arrowhead. I hate prehistory so much it’s unreal

[angel-derangement]

I hate it too tbh

[beholdingslut]

in absolute tears about the pride module at my work

[dikdikpronouncedxylophone]

[bigfoots-biggest-fan]

HOLY SHIT GUYS, I WAS INSPIRED BY THIS POST TO TRY MAKE THE SONG AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT WHEN I DRAGGED THE TRAINING AUDIO OVER THE BACKING TRACK AND IT LINED UP PERFECTLY

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Tempted to actually put this on spotify so I can secretly stream it at work...

Tagging @batshit-auspol because as an Australian you're the only big account I know who might share (sorry).

[natmasthestinkylizardliker]

I'm losing my fucking mind, what a banger, put some dirty bass on that and it would hit the gay party scene like a third plane

[thatbowserguy]

This goes so fucking hard