No reason for it to live forever. Just let it be the beautiful terrible thing it is, and then keep moving, keep moving.
I think a lot of horror writers struggle writing likable characters. Jones is great at writing characters that you not only love, but feel protective of. He writes the bleakness and horror of the mundane traumas of everyday life, while always keeping that spark of love and hope alive. My only criticism would be that I feel like the inner narration of characters echo each other a bit much, but the narrative style is so interesting an fun to read that it's not something to linger on. I think I might have enjoyed it a liiiiitle bit more than the first, mostly because of pacing reasons. Action, mystery, scares, and heart...she's got it all!! But, uh, definitely check out those trigger warnings.
Read Harder Challenge #1: Escape From Incel Island! by Margaret KillJoy
"Alright," I said. We've got this." I put on my best "were not fucked, despite all available evidence" voice. I learned that voice from my public defender, who used it to prep me for my testimony right before she failed to get me off on manslaughter charges.
I was kind of leery that the premise couldn't couldn't sustain itself for a novella-length story, but the humor doesn't rely on lambasting incels for being pathetic and misogynistic (there's is some of that, but also insight and empathy and wit). It has a lot of laugh out loud moments, thanks to the sheer absurdity and camp of the characters and plot. It kind of reminded me a bit of the stories Daria would write. I've had The Lamb will slaughter the Lion on my TBR list forever, and I def want to check it out now!!
P.S. There's also an TTRPG based on it, which is very fun.
Other fantasy writer dudes: Well here’s my buff manly hero guy Conanaragorn. He’s edgier and beefier than Aragorn but totally not Conan. He is very manly and has a sword.
Michael Moorcock: This is Elric of Melniboné. He’s an albino goth twink with asthma. He huffs fantasy speedballs and is married to his cousin. He’s his own sword’s bitch and he’s going to run away crying from this fight.
I think the thing about discworld that resonates with so many queer people is that it’s so focussed on stereotypes and what they do, who creates them and who benefits them. Like we all know an old ugly woman is a witch, but then the story stops short like. Well, but why?
What is it about an old woman with chin hairs that people dislike so much? And who is she? What might she have to say? The omniscient POV is so vital because it reminds you that everyone in the world is a person. They all have hopes and fears and little neuroses. They all die, sooner or later, some with dignity and some without.
But we wander around the world of the story slipping into peoples heads only to discover ah, they are people. The evil ones and the most well-intentioned ones. We have to start asking, but if all the trolls and the vampires and the monsters from the stories are also like, just a guy, then what? Then is a monster just an arbitrary distinction? Does it only serve the story? And if it only serves the story, well, who is telling that story? And for what purpose?
The Truth by Terry Pratchett is to be released as an audiobook on 23rd February, with Mathew narrating! Alongside Peter Serafinowicz as the voice of Death and Bill Nighy as the voice of the footnotes.
A lie can run round the world before the truth has got its boots on.
William de Worde is the accidental editor of the Discworld's first newspaper.
Now he must cope with the traditional perils of a journalist's life - people who want him dead, a recovering vampire with a suicidal fascination for flash photography, some more people who want him dead in a different way and, worst of all, the man who keeps begging him to publish pictures of his humorously shaped potatoes.
William just wants to get at the truth. Unfortunately, everyone else wants to get at William. And it's only the third edition....
Were you, like me, gaslit by booktok influencers into reading Ice Planet Barbarians? You may be entitled to financial compensation. Call 1-800-blue-peepee for more information. Not really BUT!!! Below is a list of passable monster fucker books I discovered after spite reading like 30 of these after being utterly disappointed by IPB and hellbent on find some that were at least OKAY. Better than Ice Planet Barbarians, at least
The genre being what it is, make sure to check on the content warnings linked on TheStoryGraph if there's anything specific you're worried about. Also there ARE some lgbtqa+ books on this list (you’re welcome).
🕸🕷️Ensnared by by Tiffany Roberts🕷️🕸
I read this so long ago, and I can barely remember it tbh. A big alien spider monster finds a human woman that has crashed landed onto his planet and is like: FUCK this mammoth spider queen hottie who wants me to be her king, I want this gangly little blonde thing I fished out of a dirty hole. Ok. Sure. Pros: This author is committed to the art of monster fucking. This is not just like a guy but furry. Or a guy but scales. This is a big ass spider fucking a lady. And that’s beautiful. Cons: You know that “born sexy yesterday” trope? Because of the communication/cultural differences it kind of felt like they were both each other’s sexy baby. I didn’t really care for the characters or plot tbh, I just persevered because I just had to see how those crazy kids made it work. I was like, “seriously what are the mechanics?” Turns out: webs!
🚀🐱Engineering Fate by Alexis B. Osborne🐱🚀
Sasha tumbles through a wormhole into a part of space uninhabited by humankind--and instead inhabited by sexy cat men (yay). This one starts with the “captured by aliens” trope à la Ice Planet Barbarians, but it’s not a weird, uncomfortable sex thing (yay). Pros: I loved how active the main character was compared to the protags of this genre. She murders soooo many people. I was cheering out loud. Kill those birdmen, girlboss. Cons: Did not really care about the ML or the smut at all. But if you are into breeder kink--or were one of those kids with a huge crush on Simba growing up--then you are in for a treat.
FYI, if you read this and like it, do not read the next in the series. It’s NOT good.
🦖🪐Heart's Prisoner by Olivia Riley🪐🦖Communication specialist studies dangerous--but totally hot--alien prisoner of war “Asset X”. Pros: campy action scenes which I always enjoy. A dinosaur wreaking havoc on a space station in my sex book? More likely than you think., but the ML was fun and sexy. No “soul mates” or “that’s the mother of my child” stuff as far as I can remember, which is always a plus. Cons: The FL has as much personality as an Austin’s sandwich cracker (fyi: that’s the worst kind of sandwich character).
🐊🔮She Came From The Swamp by Darva Green🔮🐊
She was a girl, she was also a girl--but also a Ukrainian Swamp monster--Can I make it any more obvious? Let me tell you. It is already a challenge to find passable heterosexual monster smut. Sapphic monster smut? Oh my god. But this is cute and good! Pros: adorable leads, relatively simple story that focuses on what we’re all really here for. Cons: sometimes they did it while the swamp monster was in human form, and I was like. Why?
☢️💀Soul Eater by Lily Mayne💀☢️
Post-apocalyptic setting, but also there’s interdimensional portals that have appeared on all over Earth that aliens pour out of it. Aliens ranging from cute critters to blood thirsty monstrosities to shredded gay monster hotties. A supernatural monster dubbed “Soul Eater” slaughters a battlefield of men--leaving only a single soldier. What does the mysterious killer want with Danny? Pros: A bonkers plot with lots of action and violence? Check. A seemingly cold and scary love interest that is actually super soft and protective? Check. An author brave enough to actually write weird monster dick instead of just being like, “it’s big and blue!” Cons: having read a few books in this series the huge lack of meaningful female characters and non-white characters throughout is a bummer.
2023 Book log: Monstrous Regiment by Terry Pratchett
Monstrous Regiment satirizes themes of gender, war, and religion in the fantastical setting of Terry Pratchett's wonderfully irreverent Discworld. Barmaid Polly Perks lives in the charmless and highly conservative country of Borogravia. Seeking her lost soldier brother, Polly disguises as a "Oliver" and enlists alongside a cast of colorful characters including teenage runaways, a vampire, and a troll...who all have secrets of their own. Wink wink. Hijinks and gender fuckery ensue!
🍄Ratings based on the five core gnomish literary values🍄
I read this book 10ish years ago and remembered it being an absolute delight, and golly, it really held up. If you haven't read Terry Pratchett before you can totally jump in with Monstrous Regiment since it stands perfectly fine on its own weird little legs (btw anyone who tells you to read discworld chronologically is a teacher's pet and not to be trusted).
I have dog-eared the ever loving shit out of this poor little paperback. First of all this book is so funny, laugh out loud funny. But also has these poignant, beautiful little moments. It gets surprisingly dark in places, but in a way that feels necessary and is really in service to fleshing out the characters. It really grounds the book in the midst of all this absurdity and gives it this real life human quality.
Many writers write characters and then, quite separately, female characters. Pratchett just wrote interesting characters. He saw humans as flawed and weak, but also brave and hopeful and that shows in the way he writes these really silly, lovely characters.
Paul, Polly's brother, is BARELY in the book. He speaks maybe once. But through Polly telling you these little memories about him you become really come to adore him and by extension, learn about and appreciate Polly even more. And the books doesn't even need it! Paul could've just been a call to action, but instead he has his own little arc. Someone please talk to me about Paul and his birds.
And Jackrum. And Maladict. And Lofty and Tonker. Any of them really. Because my heart is so full of love for these characters.
Which is why this book works when there are more contemporary novels exploring gender much more seriously and doing a worse job, imo. I am probably biased, but ultimately it felt to me like this book was saying: Oh gender? What a funny little notion. What a silly little human invention. Grab onto it with your grubby gnome paws and do with it what you wish.
For more information and detailed content warnings I highly recommend thestorygraph.
🍄Sample passage - may be light spoilers🍄______________________________________________________________
"Bloody Jackrum left me surrounded by armed men!" Polly hissed.
"And?"
"Well, I… knocked two of them out," she said, feeling as she said it that this rather spoilt her case as a victim. "One went over the road, though."
"I think we got that one," said Maladict. "Well, I say 'got'… Tonker nearly gutted him. There's a girl with what I'd call unresolved issues." He turned round. "Let's see… seven horses, seven men. Yep."
"Tonker?" said Polly.
"Oh, yes. Hadn't you spotted her? She went mad when the man charged at Lofty. Now, let's have a look at your gentlemen, shall we?" said Maladict, heading for the inn door.
"But Lofty and Tonker…" Polly began, running to keep up. "I mean, the way they act, they… I thought she was his girl… but I thought Tonker… I mean, I know Lofty is a gi - "
Even in the dark, Maladict's teeth gleamed as he smiled. "The world's certainly unfolding itself for you, eh? Ozzer? Every day, something new. Cross-dressing now, I see."
"What?"
"You are wearing a petticoat, Ozzer," said Maladict, stepping into the bar. Polly looked down guiltily and started to tug it off, and then thought: hang on a moment...
"The captain looks bad," he said. "What did he try to do to poor little you?"
Any old book can make you feel good. It takes a special book to make you feel BAD. But still be like, "yeah that was pretty good actually". Did I enjoy these books? Yes. Do I recommend these books? Not really. For the morbidly curious, please check out the content warnings in the linked TheStoryGraphy pages if you want to read but are worried about triggers.
🐝Slug and Other Stories by Megan Milks🪲
This anthology is strange and gross and off-putting. I thought many times about not finishing it. What happened instead, however, was that I completely devoured it in one sitting. If you're feeling a lot of fuckery over sex and gender and instead of attempting to package those feelings away with a sweet little bow, you want to dump those feelings into a pile of wet garbage and writhe around in them...this is a great read.
🩸The Monster of Elendhaven by Jennifer Giesbrecht🔪
Horrible queer people deserve representation too! These two gay Victorian weirdos LOVE three things: being miserable, doing a murder, and exchanging sassy little quips. That’s about the sum of it.
🐬Made for Love by Alissa Nutting🌺
Woman lives with dying father in a trailer full of sex dolls while escaping from narcissist tech billionaire husband who can track her every move. I read this because of the HBO adaptation, and there is an extremely uncomfortable element that was left out of the series for VERY apparent reasons. Funny, dark, and strangely relatable. But disturbing. Don’t read this probably.
💄Codename Villanelle Series by Luke Jennings💣
Horrible queer people part 2! A MI6 operative and an international assassin make goo goo eyes at each other over a pile of mangled corpses. I love that the author takes the sexy killer concept and shows how fucked that relationship would actually be. This series just gets progressively more bonkers, and me? Here for it. Present and accounted for.
dededos
kianamaiart
andulkaphoto
tangentwithtanner
annaxmalina
stormborns
turnnoffyourmind
pixelskylines
