i was not myself last night

chris | 18+ only | possibly a bee jumping up and down on a keyboard

[catsoverloaded]

Poor girl broke her favorite sitting basket.

[kitten-cab00dle]

I’m sorry but this is the funniest thing I have ever seen ever in my fucking life her PEETS are STICKING OUT

[universeleads]

I explained the concept of "blorbo from my shows" to my 71 year old immigrant grandfather because I referenced it in passing and I thought nothing of it, until today when he said "I think I'll watch peaky blinders tonight and see my blorbo from my shows" referring, of course, to Cillian Murphy playing Tommy Shelby

[universeleads]

English isn't his first language so he's not super in touch with modern slang, so I've been accidentally teaching him to talk like a tumblr user. His favorite thing to say lately is "me when I'm a little hater" when he's like talking shit about the neighbor's son

[overwhelmedfernfrond]

I explained the “x before gta6” meme to my immigrant father and he, in turn, explained to me how back in his day in Romania, they had the same type of joke, except instead of it being gta6, it was about the imminent death of a singer named Gică Petrescu, who everyone was continuously shocked by because he refused to die. Every time a momentous event happened people would say, in essence: “This happened and Gică Petrescu hasn’t even died yet?!?”

So. He understood the gta6 meme immediately because they apparently had the same thing in Romania when he was young, except way, way more morbid

[victusinveritas]

He's prostrating himself before the Eucharist, in case you're wondering. Or possibly planking.

[vvatchword]

@apocrypals

[apocrypals]

Hi, pope expert here. This isn’t funny — popes only do this when they’re in extreme distress

[rainathrownaway]

We're all in extreme distress, he's not special.

[zawaruka]

I love them so much 😭

[red-eye-radio]

So I thought y'all would like this too This great white comes to the jersey shore every year and this year they named her and have been tracking her hella so this is Mary Lee and she decided to show herself under this rainbow for pride month A true gay icon

[victoryyodel]

#This is the representation I’ve been looking for

[darkaviarymc]

Tragedy alignment chart. Feel free to use, but please reblog if you do.

[stellarskyes]

[daveedmee]

explosion at health potion factory 0 dead 0 injured

[jadefyre]

17 healed

[pharmacommissar]

you dhould be your own person. you are so young and insecure. at this rate you will never be able to find the cup or the scepter

what

[jeyneofpoole]

louis venez ici i’m incredibly distressed i’ve been trawling here on the wifi and i’ve come across something most loathsome do you see this monstrosity? regarde ça this deceitful little bar has been advertised to me as a form of electronic cigarette! they say it is blue raspberry flavored louis i hate this so utterly i cannot stand it. je vais me fuer this century is shallow and rude there is no such thing as a blue raspberry and there is no such thing as an electronic cigarette i refuse to accept it. what makes this cigarette electronic in the least? does it connect to the wifi? i love the wifi louis i wish that the wifi would not associate with this hateful institution. is this one and the same with that detestable object armand refers to as his ‘banana ice puff bar’ i abhor that one most of all it emits the worst odor c’est vraiment mauvais. louis mon cher you must promise that you will never fall sway under the influence of this infernal device i do not know if my heart could take such a beating. i will not allow those plastic pretenders in my home la main à dieu we must find a way to end this

[important-animal-images]

[thenookienostradamus]

oh siddhartha gautama, called Buddha, we're really in it now

[regularhill]

[lacefuneral]

me if i was lobsta 🦞 monday

[twentythousandblades]

[notaplaceofhonour]

Ryan Gosling’s career has just been one long quest to climb the Warner Bros water tower

[notaplaceofhonour]

that man has been trying to climb this tower since he was 16. he has asked multiple times, and every time they said no, but now he’s famous enough & variety was able to convince them to do a shoot on the tower. it all led here. it was all for this.

[notaplaceofhonour]

I’m obsessed with the implication that this was a coming-of-age ritual where a boy becomes a man, like a bar mitzvah

[shymagnolia]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

[shymagnolia]

okay so i just got my dream job??? a week after applying to it?? and now i’m thinking….maybe this is the good luck post

[flagellant]

…..not even six hours later i got an offer of a well paying full time long-term job with free room and board in queens in nyc, allowing me independence and a way to escape an abusive situation and an unhealthy environment

likes charge reblogs cast, folks, this is the good luck post

[coffee-or-hot-cocoa]

i need all the help i can get for finals

[finnglas]

Hey so

the last time I reblogged this post right before I got a great job, in a permanent work-from-home position, with benefits, retirement, and a salary literally 3x what I was making before, doing something I really like. 

So you know. 

This might be the real one, y’all.

[asurrogateblog]

I can see people’s auras but I don’t believe in that stuff so I just ignore it

[fredbydawn]

Phantom of the Paradise Out of Touch THURSDAY

[cryptotheism]

"Medieval Christians would have gone nuts for protons, neutrons, and electrons for trinity reasons" sounds like a jokey oversimplification historypost but I cannot really articulate how true that is. They would never shut up about it.

[ahopefulbromantic]

RIP St Thomas Aquinas you would have loved atomic physics