ass bandicoot

melvin | 25 | he/him | oklahoma mvskoke

[onlinegf]

how do i explain that i am only hot online

[nighthaunting]

thought too hard about MRI machines today and had this come to me in a vision

[beesmygod]

mri accident is literally one of my biggest anxiety freakouts. i dont care about being in the tiny loud tube, im so scared of a secret piece of metal i dont know about in my body will tear through me like a knife through butter. what if i ate a quarter in my sleep

[neutral-wizard]

Quarters George who eats a $10 roll of quarters every night is shredded into a fine mist my the MRI

[its-grape-juice-i-swear]

TIME TO POST ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITE IMAGES!!!!

Back when I worked at the hospital, I had to take MRI training and it was my favorite thing every time. It was only like 10 minutes long and went a little something like this:

Hey. The MRI is basically a really big magnet and by basically I mean it is and we literally never turn it off. It's like really big. Really really big and powerful and The Magnet is always on. We don't turn it off Ever, for any reason. We mean it bro, The Magnet is literally always on. It's crazy strong and will definitely kill you. So don't bring any metal into the MRI room, man. You will fuck up the machine (because The Magnet is always on) and then you will die (again, because The Magnet is always on). Here's some fun questions for you to test your understanding!

1) The ______ is always on.

2) The Magnet is ______ on.

3) How often is The Magnet on?

4) The Magnet is always __.

5) The Magnet is always on. T/F

6) The Magnet is usually on but we know to turn it off for you because you're a very special boy :) T/F

7) My weak fleshy body can survive the wrath of The Magnet. T/F

8) Look at this 500 lbs steel hospital bed, which The Magnet has crumpled into an origami crane. Imagine if that was you.

9) Is The Magnet ever off?

10) Sometimes we turn The Magnet off. T/F

Thank you for taking MRI training. We hope you learned that The Magnet is always on, because it is. It's on Right Now and it will be on every time you come to the MRI. Have fun and remember: The Magnet is always on!

I love you MRI training. The Magnet is always on.

[loveridden1999]

when england lose, women bruise

[osmanthusoolong]

Seen in downtown Toronto as well

[grox]

I'm a 27 year old man and I got hanahaki disease because they fired the clerk I like at the vape store

[dyslexic-canine-deactivated2025]

Me walking on my gay paws

[caridina]

if u think im pretty. splash me 💦

if u think im scary. slash me 🔪

if u think im smoky. ash me 🚬

if u think im small potatoes. mash me 🥔

[midnightssea]

what if the US adopted the UK tradition of the head of government resigning in disgrace as soon as people start getting mad at them. let’s try it just once and see what happens.

[houndmother]

many of you just. genuinely don’t believe that people can grow and change.

[houndmother]

this is about the death penalty and its also about call out posts about people who have already apologized for things they did a long time ago and it’s also about using ‘toxic’ or ‘abuser’ as if its an immutable class of person, and its also about any other circumstance with permanent consequences or wherein you assume someone is still the same person they were.

[hemipenal-system]

look there’s a lot of gender politics takes where i disagree pretty strongly but i can at least see how you got there and respect that path. that is so not true of “every trans man has male privilege” though. thats like the flat earth of gender politics. i just can’t even fathom how you could unironically believe that. sorry

[liberalsarecool]

Stay engaged.

[toastyglow]

the backrooms are simply not as scary conceptually if there is Something In Them

[toastyglow]

the whole reason why they're so unnerving is BECAUSE there's nothing in them!! because they're unrelentingly liminal and lonely and uncomforting. there shouldn't be a monster guy in there chasing you. you should glimpse other humans (?) from a distance but they walk away before you can close the gap and then they're gone. things should run away from YOU. do u get it

[depsidase]

[doodlesorganizationland]

The Port Gamble S’Klallam Tribe made this card for their citizens to present to ICE.

If you are in a different federally recognized tribe in Washington State:

“I am a member of the (insert tribe here) Tribal Nation, which is Tribal Nation federally recognized by the United States.

This means I am also a United States citizen according to the U.S. Citizenship Act of 1924, 8 USC Section 1401.

Our tribe’s enrollment office number is (insert phone number here).

The Native American Rights Fund will assist me if you attempt to illegally detain me. Contact them at 303-447-8760”

[tranthony]

grout white shark

[aahedandfamily]

The explosives dropped on the people of the Gaza Strip are equivalent to 20 nuclear bombs like those dropped on Nagasaki and Hiroshima. Does anyone still doubt that Israel committed and continues to commit genocide and ethnic cleansing against us here in the Gaza Strip?

[batmanshole]

crisp glass of water moodboard

[byehellsitelmao-deactivated2023]

mmmmmhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmm....................

mmmhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...........

[byehellsitelmao-deactivated2023]

mmmmmmmmmMWWWWEAAAAAH!