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š©µ avery cochrane š©µ
romaā
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
ā£ Chile in a Photography ā£
Aqua Utopiaļ½ęµ·ć®åŗć§čØę¶ćē“”ć
shark vs the universe
taylor price
blake kathryn
almost home
Cosmic Funnies
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
todays bird
oozey mess
YOU ARE THE REASON
occasionally subtle
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Jimmy Eat World
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
seen from Philippines
seen from Pakistan
seen from Malaysia
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from Singapore
seen from Malaysia
seen from Brazil
seen from Germany
seen from Japan
seen from Italy
seen from Singapore
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Latvia
seen from Argentina
seen from Thailand
seen from Saudi Arabia
seen from Singapore
seen from Philippines
@unbeatablecurlgirl
Why is pet play always dogs anyway
Youre a dirty little goldfish arent you. daddys gonna clean your tank out so good so you have to wait in the sink until im done.
Apparently because you have no idea how to care for anything but a dog
Daddy is not known for his animal husbandry
Re: sailors on USS Abraham Lincoln on half rations.
tumblr users yearn for the much-maligned genre of "iowa writers workshop divorce litfic"
lesbian texting their straight guy friends: it genuinely worries me that people are going to start with Vineland and get turned off to Pynchon forever. itās not even that challenging but itās likeā¦others from him are so superior in basically every way?? this happened with Inherent Vice too like ok letās all KILL OURSELVES
lesbian texting their bisexual guy friends: Omg hiii I actually do not know anyone who would be a good fit to run in bar marketing for the doritos infused tequila but thank you for thinking of me!! Are you still doing the MFA???
lesbian texting their gay guy friends: Of COURSE you can have my french onion soup recipe. Donāt worry.
lesbian texting their straight girl friends: that hang was sooo needed. genuinely think this is going to be your year š«¶ seriously I mean it.
lesbian texting their bisexual girl friends: I know. I feel the same wayāthat this is the year my fatherās corpse, which I drag with me on my back every winter, finally stops keeping me warm.
lesbian texting their lesbian girl friends: do you think Tim Roth from Reservoir Dogs is a woman
who else has fantasized about the Nutrient Brick
š
(Source)
Mangione faced two criminal trials; this federal case dealing with stalking charges and a separate New York case dealing with murder charges. Mangione's lawyers have now tried to get the New York case dismissed for "double jeopardy", the legal concept that you can't be punished multiple times for the same offense.
This was not a plea deal, and prosecutors plan to seek life in prison for Mangione at his sentencing (scheduled for December).
one time a guy i know whose girlfriend was heavily pregnant didnāt tweet anything for a whole day so i texted himĀ ācongrats on your babyā and made him think i had some kind of baby precognitionĀ
like six months after that just after halloween i asked to see his son dressed as aĀ āfat baby pumpkinā and he was likeĀ āwho told youā and i saidĀ āno one. itās halloween. you have a fat baby. heās going to be a pumpkināĀ
bbc sherlock wants what i have
you know that quote "when you have a hammer everything looks like a nail" bc that's how i feel whenever i have a lysol wipe in my hand
Reading about an arsenic murder case in which probably a daughter killed her mom with poisoned clam chowder but she was acquitted because the defense were like ācan you prove that ANYONE wouldnāt die after eating takeout clam chowder delivered by children in August? In 1896?ā and the jury were like no yeah fair point I too have had clam chowder stomach
teenage girls in fiction: hes so cute i wanna slow dance with him at prom :3 hehe
real teenage girls: imagine if he got injured and i had to tend to his wounds and i could watch him seize up a bit as i disinfect them and in the haze of fever he sees me as an angel
nobody else doing it like me. particularly because the way iām doing it is needlessly difficult
oh, no, you misunderstand me. those were my monkeys. yeah the circus and i have since parted ways. yeah it was the elephant thing, i dont really want to address that right now though
woke up this morning, rolled over, and very confidently tried to blow out my alarm clock like a candle. absolutely no precedent for that.
In the year 1450 a priest rolls over and slams his hand into his candle, burning him and sending wax flying all over the place
