@undrscrsxm - Tumblr Blog

basic human empathy has got to make a comeback divas

damn those two doubles i frank within the span of 30 mins oh and the two shots and the 3 cocktails i had on the close before are really hitting on this walk home huh

#oh and the couple times oh a j i was given from the walk to their house from the bar #hashtag #drunk as a skunk #get me hame

what look must be on my face when i walk home for an old drunk bloke to stop his phone call to ask if i was alright

#maybe it was cuz i was listening to mcr #or yeah maybe not even for the look on my face maybe it was loud enough this fella heard it and had to ask #his ass heard cemetery drive and went oh brother

the way an empty packet of crisps thats been littered on the city streets can float so gracefully across the cobblestone in the nighttime breeze

#she was almost #moving as if she was moving along the streets to #like maybe she was walking home too #or going to mcdonald’s after being out #sentences no one has ever said before

finally-figured-it-out

There was a young man from Peru

Whose limericks stopped at line two

finally-figured-it-out

There once was a man from Verdun

genteelblackhole42

There once was a man from the sticks Whose limericks stopped at line six. They were fine till line five Then they took quite a dive — But the problem is easy to fix If you just ignore the last line, it doesn't even follow the rhyme scheme oh god I've really lost control of this thing I'm so sorry...

shredsandpatches

There once was a man

From Cork who got limericks

And haiku confused.

ruckuscauser

There once was a man from the sticks

Who liked to compose limericks

But he failed at the sport

Because he wrote them too short

rat-girl-big-tits

@limerickshere

fremedon

There once was a fellow named Dan, Whose poetry never would scan. When told this was so, He replied, "Yes, I know-- It's because I try to squeeze as many syllables into the last line as I possibly can."

paulgadzikowski

On Tumblr did lasses and lads Their way with fail poetry had. You're having your fun But you're fooling no one - It takes skill to do something this bad.

fifiibibii

whitepeopletwitter

samshine-and-lollipops-deactiva

Wait, it got better.

libertineangel

He does this a lot, to my deep surprise in undergrad:

For reference, the reason nobody likes this book and you can press tofu with it is that it’s about 1600 pages long.

horizon-penblade

It’s also, by all accounts, the origin of Cousin Throckmorton

supreme-leader-stoat

sukinapan

your local forecast

toskarin

why didn't they just leave pompeii when the volcano erupted? were they stupid?

foone

Fun fact: they did leave Pompeii! It's estimated that the population pre-eruption was something like 20,000, and the most likely number of dead in is in the range of 1,500-4,000. So most people just did leave Pompeii, it's just that not everyone left or could leave.