Cornfed’s Movie Talk

always on some shit.

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DRUGSTORE COWBOY (1989)

The only good thing about this movie was the name. And of course Matt Dillon. Only watchable as eye candy.

***1/5 FF’s

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COME AND SEE (1985)

An excruciating look into WWII, specifically Nazi war crimes, through the eyes of a young Belarusian boy. Originally called KILL HITLER, but changed to the less aggressive, more ominous title of COME AND SEE as a nod to end-days described in the Book of Revelations. Florya leaves his mother and sisters to join Resistance fighters after uncovering a rifle buried in the sand. He quickly becomes disillusioned with ideations of glory as the atrocities of war rage around him; sparing no man, woman or child.

While the events of the film may seem gratuitously violent and cruel, they are based real events that took place not just once, but 628 times as Nazis burned through Belarus, decimating 25% of the population.

The viewer is immersed into Florya’s world, including audio changes for the remainder of the movie after he survives a bombing and several scenes where the actor/actress speaks directly into the camera. Real rounds were also used on set as well as unprofessional local actors to add to its authenticity.

It’s been called “the only anti-war movie every made” which is interesting enough since another argument is that no anti-war movies are ever made because by nature they glorify war; or, in other words, a true anti-war movie makes for a very unpleasant watch. In COME AND SEE, there is no happy ending or even validation for the protagonist. Much like reality, the common people affected are left with little to nothing and at a cost so great there is no recovery. For foot soldiers the journey is unrelentingly paved with one horror after another and characters like Florya, who started fresh and naive, are left a withered shell of their former selves—if they are left at all.

*5/5 FFs. Hard watch, but an important piece of cinema. **BiG TRIGGER WARNING: disturbing content throughout including war crimes, rape, and the real death of a cow.

Free with subtitles on YouTube, don’t both with the dubbed version.

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GOOD TIME (2017)

A film by the Safdie brothers (creators of Uncut Gems, the 2019 crime drama starring Adam Sandler). I found this movie after seeing a pic of Robert Pattinson with bleached hair and a pierced ear I knowing I had to check it out. It’s now one of my favorite movies. The protagonist, or more aptly antihero, Connie, played by Pattinson, entangles his mentally handicapped and hearing impaired brother Nick, played by director Benny Safdie, in a bank robbery. Things go awry and Nick is jailed at Rykers Island while Connie goes on the run and plots Nick’s rescue. From there it is a fast paced trip to destruction, fueled entirely by Connie’s narcissism and willing abuse of all those around him—ranging from family members, friends and kind strangers, to fellow criminals.

Despite his antisocial tendencies, Connie is charismatic and seemingly loved. I even found myself rooting for him even though he’s clearly a degenerate piece of shit, but everyone has known a master manipulator and often it’s not until we’ve been used and abused that it becomes apparent.

There may be something to say about white privilege here too; ie Connie tromping through the world like he owns it while characters like Crystal, the 16yo black girl, is questioned by the police just for being present.

Jennifer Jason Leigh also has a fun lil part with a lot of screaming.

Lastly, and interestingly enough, there are no bullets fired in the movie, despite violence throughout and taking place in NYC.

****5/5 FFs, I really liked it.

Not currently available to stream, but purchasable on YouTube or however you get your movies.

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Let’s hear it for the Magical Negros! The ‘Magical Negro’ or ‘Super-Duper Magical Negro’ is a common fiction trope that is both racist and somewhat hilarious in which a black character has some sort of super power which he or she uses to help a white protagonist with little to no regard for their own needs or wellbeing. These stock characters often sacrifice themselves unrealistically for the white characters. Stephen King is the guiltiest of all for using this trope. Key and Peele also did a hilarious skit about it. Here’s a few examples:

1. John Coffey, The Green Mile

2. Dick Hollorann, The Shining (even worse in the Kubrick film because at least he lives in the book)

3. Mr. Chubbs, Happy Gilmore

4. The blind man, O Brother Where Art Thou? (on wiki it says the guitarist is too, but I disagree)

5. The psychic, Jeepers Creepers

6. Mr. Bloom, the Twilight Zone.

7. Mother Abigail, The Stand

8. Morpheus and the psychic, The Matrix

9. Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost, from what I’ve heard, but I haven’t seen it. If true that makes her count to 2 since she also played Mother Abigail in The Stand remake.

Now that you see it you’ll be forever watching for the Magical Negro!

I also want to point out that I do like many of these characters, especially Dick Hollorann. While it is racist, I’d like to believe it didn’t come from a place of hate, rather a place of misunderstanding and underrepresentation of black people in movies/literature. What do you think? Interested to hear some opinions.

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TRUE ROMANCE (1993)

If you have never seen this movie and can handle Christian Slater for more than 2 hours hit it up ASAP (that said I actually liked Slater much more in this movie than I have in other roles). It’s a violent romantic comedy about a call girl, an oddball maybe schizophrenic cinephile, and a suitcase of stolen cocaine. Featuring the insane cast of: Patricia Arquette, Christian Slater, Gary Oldman (picture a menacing version of ‘Alien’ from Spring Breakers), Christopher Walken, Brad Pitt, Samuel L Jackson, Dennis Hopper, Val Kilmer, Michael Rapaport, and James Gandolfini.

Since the screenplay was written by Tarantino I’m guessing the only reason I hadn’t heard of this movie before is the cheesy name—not to mention the cheeseball trailer, good lawd. Do not be deterred! It’s hilarious and unexpectedly gritty.

***4/5 FFs

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get to know me: [2/5] favorite animated movies - Coraline (2009)

“You know, you could stay forever, if you want to. There’s one tiny thing we have to do first…”

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DALLAS BUYERS CLUB (2013)

The plot follows McConaughey, a homophobic Texas cowboy who is diagnosed with AIDS, and his unlikely partnership with fellow AIDS patient Rayon (Leto), a drug addicted trans woman. Together they hustle unapproved drugs from Mexico that extend the lives of many patients in the 80’s AIDS epidemic.

For such a heartbreaking topic, the movie still ends feeling like a success.

***5/5 FFs loved it.

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SNOWTOWN (2011)

Biographical crime drama about the Australian ‘bodies in barrels’ case. I had prior knowledge of the story as a true crime follower, but wasn’t prepared for the sheer rawness of the film. Serial killer John Bunting charms his way into the home of a single mother living in Adelaide with her four sons then uses the guise of hunting pedophiles to persuade sexually abused young men to assist in his brutal torture killings. One of his accomplices is his girlfriend’s 16 year old son, Jamie.

Daniel Henshall was terrifying and convincing as the master manipulator and sadist responsible for the deaths of 12 people, not all of which we see. Lucas Pittaway also gives a heartbreaking performance as Jamie, who ultimately participated in the murders, but remains sympathetic through most of the movie. He later became a key witness for the prosecution.

It’s a slow build that effectively creates a believable portrayal of what happened when at risk people were influenced by a violent sociopath.

Not for the faint of heart (or stomach).

Free on YouTube.

***4/5 FFs

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Actual footage of me when I see strangers argue in public.

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When you’re a mEaN bOi, but a romantic.

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THE VOICES (2014)

Ryan Reynolds plays an awkward, lonely, and very mentally ill man who lives with his pets—a mastiff and an orange tabby. His psychosis manifests in his animals with the dog being kind and encouraging and the cat being devious and manipulative (both hilariously voiced by Reynolds). Eventually it all goes to hell, but thanks to a surprising performance from Reynolds, you’re still kinda rooting for the poor guy. Also starring Jenna Kendrick and Gemma Arterton.

***4/5 FFs

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Who else can hear this scene no audio?? 😂😂

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Heard you were asking where I learned my club moves.

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THE HOUSE THAT JACK BUILT (2018)

Starring: Matt Dillon, Uma Thurman, Riley Keough, and Bruno Ganz

Just as pretentious and extremely graphic as can be expected from director Lars von Trier, this film follows the life of Jack, a serial killer and narcissist who obsesses over the creation of his house. The narrator, Virgil, eventually leads Jack through hell (Dante’s Inferno style) after he builds a house made of his victims corpses.

I didn’t like this movie much. Like I said, I found it a little too pretentious and even for all the violence and symbology, it didn’t spur much emotion (except for one particular ‘eww’—post hunting scene, ykwim?).

Also there’s particular violence against children so TRIGGER WARNING before watching

Matt Dillons still a hottie, Uma Thurman is great as ever. Lars, we get it you’re sad and twisted.

***1/5 FFs

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THE BOONDOCKS SAINTS (2000)

Or, A Lesson in Ridiculousness.

Starring: Norman Reedus, Sean Patrick Flanery, William Dafoe, David Della Rocco, and adult film star Ron Jeremy

This was a big deal when it came out. Multiple friends from high school got Boondock Saints tattoos (see the bottom for their gofundmytattooremoval link), every incel was ready to change the world with a gun and a trench coat, and Norman Reedus had apparently peaked. Boys, it’s The Boondock Saints!

The movie follows two Irish Catholic brothers on a vigilante mission from God to ‘clean up the streets’. Equipped with matching tattoos, trench coats, rosaries, and some dope shades, these brothers are ready to dish out some ass whoopin’s—church style. FUCK YEAH! Spiritus sancti.

No, I don’t hate the movie. It’s actually one of my favorites. The early scene where he throws the toilet off the building is badass and it’s fun and entertaining throughout, but I don’t think it’s supposed to be funny for any of the reasons I love it. I could also do with less preachiness, ToO DeEP FoR YeW. For example, violence seems like an easy option if you’re willing to do it, but in real life it’s been proven over and over that violence begets violence. New crime bosses will show up, lives will be made harder by their actions, even if others are saved, then there’s casualties like Rocco, ect. It’s the same logic behind my view of Taxi Driver—a desperate man wants to make a difference, but in a way that will be most gratifying to his own ego. The difference to me (apart from one being a cinematic masterpiece and one being hot trash) is that Taxi Driver still ends with ambiguity, whereas The Boondock Saints goes out of its way to say that their actions are just, law or not, and that even God condones and even encourages it. A bold statement from a film that plays like a campy action movie. The plot doesn’t even make much sense…ah. Anyway… Again I actually do like this movie. Smh.

So it starts off with the brothers at the end of their rope with the violence in their city, they’ve had enough! So after their simultaneous and semi-erotic visits from God or something after a night in jail, they set out on their mission. Their friend Rocco is involved with the city’s crime bosses, including Ron Jeremy, so he gives the brothers the intel to bring them down. After a few synchronized killings, Rocco eventually joins them, but isn’t badass enough like the brothers to survive and is killed off.

We also get William Dafoe on his knees doing fingers guns, William Dafoe in drag (incidentally my Halloween costume last year), William Dafoe listening and dancing to classical music in crime scenes… his whole character is unbelievable. Here’s his best quotes -> ->

“Looks like we’ve got us a cowboy.”

“Kinda makes me feel like river dancing.”

“Cuddle? Whatta fag.”

and of course,

“There was a FIIIUAHHH FIGHTTT!”

After a brutal shootout, the brothers meet Papa Boondock, their long lost dad AKA the guy with 6 guns and together they raise hell in a courtroom and warn the people to stay in check. THE END!

Never forget—pour ammonia on the blood!!

***3.5/5 FFs CULT STATUS

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