Unwise adventures

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[unwise-adventures]

hey. erm. i reset my password. should i come back here? i lost my insta a few years ago and if i don't have u there again plz let me know.

hi hello

[polyglotplatypus]

my weirdest hobby is re-creating memes in html so i have a crisp, HQ version of them to use and edit whenever i need

[hell-and-pepsi]

you’re doing god’s work here

[polyglotplatypus]

meme restoration. my hobby is called meme restoration

[belovedsheith]

it’s the Fifth Element song that almost nobody can actually fucking, like you’re not really supposed to be able to sing from alto –> high F above high C

just

even if you know nothing about music this is fucking iMPRESSIVE???

[cricketcat9]

OMG she has INCREDIBLE voice, this just doesn’t happen!

[lypreila]

Holy fuck

[the-peoples-of-middle-earth]

[cash-bundren]

“You fool. No man can kill me.”

How many times am I allowed to reblog this before it gets weird?

[davidkarpvevo]

[arachnofiend]

Fun facts: Tolkien constructed this scene because he came out of Macbeth thinking that Shakespeare had missed a golden opportunity with the ”Be bloody, bold, and resolute; laugh to scorn the power of man, for none of woman born shall harm Macbeth” prophecy

[majere636]

Being letdown by Macbeth is apparently a significant factor in Tolkien’s writing because the Ent/Huorn attack on Isengard was the result of his disappointment that the whole “til Birnam Wood come to Dunsinane” thing was just some dudes holding sticks and not actual ambulatory trees.

[xekstrin]

so he basically took his favorite shakespeare headcanons and put them into his AU fic

[poutineisdelicious]

This revelation just knocked me over.

[urulokid]

LET ME TELL YOU A THING ABOUT JOHN RONALD REUEL TOLKIEN. BACK THE FUCK UP SIT THE FUCK DOWN YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING YOU’RE FUCKING JON SNOW HERE. LET ME TELL U A THING

JONNY T WAS LITERALLY THE BIGGEST FANBOY TO EVER WALK THE EARTH. LITERALLY THIS FUCKIN NERD WENT INTO WORLD WAR ONE AND WROTE NORSEFIC EDDA FANFIC IN THE TRENCHES AND SENT IT TO ALL HIS FRIENDS WHO WERE PRESUMABLY LIKE “JOHN WHAT THE FUCK”

BUT IT DOESN’T END THERE

HIS WIFE? MADE HER AND HIMSELF INTO SELF-INSERT OCS IN SAID FIC. ALSO MADE HIMSELF A TOTAL TYR SELF INSERT CHARACTER. ALL VERY DRAMATIC. KEPT WRITING THIS FIC UNTIL IT WAS HUGE. AFTER HE DIED HIS SON PUBLISHED IT AND CALLED IT THE SILMARILLION. JRR YOU FUCKIN NERD

WAIT I’M NOT FUCKING DONE YET. TREEBEARD? BASED THE WAY HE TALKED OF HIS OLD FRIEND JACK WHO YOU ALL MIGHT KNOW AS CS LEWIS. THAT’S RIGHT. THAT NARNIA MOTHERFUCKER. WROTE HIM INTO LORD OF THE RINGS AKA THE SEQUEL TO THE SEQUEL OF HIS ORIGINAL FANFIC MASTERPIECE. CS LEWIS FUCKING HATED LORD OF THE RINGS. TOLKIEN FUCKING HATED NARNIA. BASICALLY THEY STARTED THE OXFORD PROFESSOR LIVEJOURNAL CLUB AND THEY FLAMED EACH OTHER’S SHIT RELENTLESSLY YET REMAINED BFFS

SHELOB? FUCKING TARANTULA BIT J-TIDDY ON THE FOOT WHEN HE WAS LIKE 3. WROTE IT INTO LORD OF THE RINGS.

HIS AUNT’S HOUSE? NAMED BAG END. YEAH YOU GUESSED IT WROTE IT INTO LORD OF THE RINGS

THIS FUCKING DORKUS SUPREME MADE UP HIS OWN LANGUAGE. WAIT NO IM WRONG. HE MADE UP LIKE 80 LANGUAGES AND DIALECTS AND ALPHABETS AND SHIT 

BEST PART OF ALL?? HIS OWN LAST NAME, TOLKIEN, WAS DERIVED FROM THE GERMAN “TOLKHUN” MEANING “FOOLHARDY”. DOES THAT RING A BELL TO ANYONE FAMILIAR TO LORD OF THE RINGS??? BECAUSE YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT PEREGRIN “PIPPIN” TOOK’S LIKE FUCKING CATCHPHRASE WAS “FOOL OF A TOOK”. TOLKIEN FIC’D HIS OWN FAMILIAL LINGUISTIC HISTORY INTO HIS WORK WHAT A DWEEB

IN 2008 HE RANKED 6TH ON A LIST OF THE TOP 50 BRITISH WRITERS SINCE 1945. HE WAS A PROFESSOR OF LANGUAGES AND OTHER IMPORTANT STUFFY SHIT AT OXFORD

AND JRR TOLKIEN WAS THE BIGGEST DWEEB EVER TO LIVE

THE END

[urulokid]

#somebody fuckin censored this post like a weirdo so i had to go back a bit to find an uncensored version????? #what a fuckin weirdo????????#worth it #lotr #jrrt

WHO THE FUCK CENSORED MY GLORIOUS FUCKING RANT ON TOLKIEN

DO YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THERE’S A VERSION FLOATING AROUND WITHOUT ALL MY SWEARS

UNBELIEVABLE

THIS IS THE WORK OF MORGOTH I TELL YOU 

[themidwifeisin]

Recently I heard of the concept of putting a penis in a urethra... Is this even possible?! Wouldn't it hurt? Is it safe? Is this a real thing?

OMG that sounds horrible please don’t do that!

Really, putting anything in a urethra (even the things we use as medical providers) can significantly damage the extremely fragile tissue of the urethra.  The urethra is the opening (& the tube) that pee comes out of.  It’s above the vaginal opening and below the clitoris.  Yes, it IS a separate hole.  Here is a diagram (I added hair so that this wouldn’t look like a mannequin vulva):

See that tiny little dot in the middle?  Honestly, most people can’t even point the urethra out, and healthcare providers need to learn specifically how to find it since it is so tiny.

SOMETIMES we put a very thin flexible soft rubber tube through the urethra and into the bladder in order to remove urine if there is some reason that person needs help to do so.  This (and other less common medical procedures) is pretty much the ONLY time I recommend putting something up through the urethra.

Some people enjoy urethral sounding.  I don’t think I’ve heard of urethral sounding for someone with a vulva - it’s commonly used for people with penises.  From Lovehoney, “Urethral play is the process of dilating the urethra by inserting a plug or probe (also known as a sound). Just as the head of the penis is super-sensitive to touch, the urethra is also packed with highly-responsive nerve endings which feel amazing when stimulated.” See the whole Urethral Sounding for Beginners article here.  This pic is a medical illustration, but it’s basically the same idea:

BUT PLEASE.  Don’t put anything in your urethra without being extremely, EXTREMELY careful and only things as small as an approved urethral sound or medical urethral catheter.

[unwise-adventures]

Vagina owners can *definitely* do urethral sounding and find it enjoyable. 

[babyanimalgifs]

tigers chasing a drone

credit: @cnninternational

[sushinfood]

alternative title:

underestimation costs zoo $400 

[latining]

Shoutout to all the girls who weren’t like other girls, and later realised that was because they weren’t girls at all.

[chokesngags]

Just some words of real shit -

Be careful who you have unprotected sex with.

Be careful who you vent to.

Be careful of how you use the word ‘love.’

Know when to let that shit go.

Be careful who you speak to about your finances. 

Calm down before making decisions in anger.

Some bridges need to be burned.

Know the difference between like, lust and love.

Trust your gut.

Write it down; you’re not gonna remember.

Find an outlet for your stress/anxiety. Run, yoga, drink/smoke in moderation, write, meditate. find something that works for you.

Once it’s on the internet, it’s nachos anymore.

Stop trying to please everyone. It is impossible. Someone will be offended. Someone will be unsatisfied. 

Drink more fucking water. 

Memorize important numbers by heart. Your phone may not always be available.

Love yourself. Learn to if you do not know how. If you put yourself first in all that you do, it will come to you soon. 

Stop caring so much about what people will think and say. Because fuck em. 

Stop lurking through his/her shit. Mind your got damn business and live.

Try to be considerate of how your actions or lack of can affect others. You never know what people may have going on. The inconvenience can cost time, energy and money.

Communication kills assumptions.

Cum often.

#kbye

[finally-a-realistic-studyblr]

I've noticed something...

There doesn’t seem to be any lists of ADHD studyblrs out there, and I’ve had some people ask me if I know of any. So I’ve decided to create a list of all ADHD studyblrs! Along with a list of blogs that are help and give advice on coping with ADHD. This list is just the ones I know of, so if you have one and are not on this list please reblog it with your studyblr!

ADHD STUDYBLRS: @adhdstudying @adhdstudy @adhdstudyblr @adhdscholar @studyadhd @adhdstudytips @finally-a-realistic-studyblr (me!!)

ADHD BLOGS: @actuallyadhd @adultadhdlifehacks @attentiondeficithyperactivedude @hey-look-a-squirrel @lifewithadhd @mentalillnessmouse (not ADHD specific but still a good resource to find help for coping with ADHD) @adhd-community @adhighdefinition @adhd-is

Again I’m sure there are way more blogs than the ones I listed, so if you have one please reblog this!!

[memewhore]

[nitdz]

[tereozil]

Laugh From Around The World In Messages.

From fb.

[mistyprime]

[drunp-archive-deactivated201711]

[thestirge]

So I heard this story second-hand, many years ago, but the gist was that a friend of a friend lived in what was generally considered a bad neighborhood, because he was a super poor college student and it was what he could afford. He didn’t have any furniture, he just slept on a blanket on the floor and had a milk crate for a chair and like an old wire spool as a table. No TV, nothing in the fridge, no microwave, basically just bare walls and a roof to keep the weather off. So one day he comes home, and there’s a man in his apartment, just standing there, with this look of utter amazement and horror on his face, and he turns to the guy who’s just entered and says, “This your place? ‘cause I broke in to rob you, but shit, man, you ain’t got nothin’. Wait here, I’m’a be right back.” And the burglar left, leaving a puzzled college student alone in his empty apartment. But sure enough, the burglar came back a while later, and brought some friends, and they delivered a table, a couple of chairs, and a small TV. “I think I got you a bed, too, but that might take a couple days.”

So, the poor college student made some friends. And he didn’t ask where they got the stuff.

[vodkassassin]

The Good Samaritan Burglar and his band of merry men

[srnear]

modern Robin Hood

[medievalpoc]

The inspiration for the trilogy came from an argument with a friend about The Hobbit movie casting and diversity and inclusion in fantasy.

Riverhead Books will publish an epic fantasy trilogy by Marlon James, winner of the Man Booker Prize for his novel A Brief History of Seven Killings.

Over the course of three books (Black Leopard, Red Wolf; Moon Witch, Night Devil; and The Boy and the Dark Star), The Dark Star Trilogy will unravel the tale of eight mercenaries hired to locate a missing boy; nine years later, the boy is dead and only three mercenaries remain, locked in the dungeon of a dying king awaiting trial for the boy’s death. Each book will take on one perspective—the Tracker, the Moon Witch, and the Boy—and reveal, Rashomon-style, what the previous books got right and wrong about the story.

Read More

[lets-steal-an-archive]

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[punkfashion]