mostly void, partially stars

Micah • They/Them • 30 • AuDHD • 18+ Content • I ponder the world building in omegaverse far too much

[urboyrosanov]

Every time I hear that someone has used generative AI to “make” something, I gain a new hobby.

[notbecauseofvictories]

if you are going to do historical inaccuracy, then go big. Just take it to a whole ‘nother level.

I mean like Knight’s Tale “chanting Queen at the jousting tournament ‘foxy lady’” levels of anachronism. Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters with Hansel injecting himself with insulin and Gretel wielding a multiple-shot crossbow levels of anachronism. Go for Blazing Saddles, Blackadder, Jack of All Trades, Connecticut Yankee levels of anachronism

you either have to play by the rules or throw out the book.

[rachandroll]

Go full on Xena. All of history happened at the same time. Get your legs broken by Caesar and find out Lao Tzu didn’t write that book, his wife did, and she hitting on you…all 10 years before you go meet up with Helen at Troy. Fight with Beowulf and commission Sappho within a few months of each other. Abraham and Issac? Only like 2 years before Jesus. Invent CPR and the kite during the bronze age. Watch your gal pal teach Homer how to be a better bard. Have a fucking battle of the bands in Ancient Greece. TIME IS MEANINGLESS.

[notthepopeiv]

Go Full On Xena

[karvina]

[evilqueerwizardassociation]

Misionero Comido Por Tigre, 1907, Noé León

[lassukmiboolelunk]

I just realized what an awesome couples' costume that'd make for Halloween

[mutinsfromthemoon]

shane coming up with a question “do you think we would be together in high school?” and ilya looked at shane’s direction and replied “we kinda did” and shane’s like “oh my good we are high school sweethearts” and ilya looked right into shane’s eyes and asked “what the fuck is high school sweethearts?”

[yrbutchgf]

i love showering it's literally like... im clean now! lol. and i no longer have mental illnesses

[kosmogrl]

[scriptiodaemon]

prove me wrong (i won't accept it) but every ilya and svetlana communication is like

"you bitch" "you fag"

wyatt is like “do they even like each other?”

harris is like “have you heard how they sometimes talk with shane? he trows asshole at him more often than his name”

and troy is like “oh i luvvvv her”

[birdyflowerdog]

The Cens are in a bar, they've just played a their last game in a long series of away games. Everyone is tired and just want to ho to their wives. It's a pretty basic evening, until-

"Man, Roz and Hollzy are really fucking living the dream. I miss my WIFE."

Everyone's eyes snap to Wyatt in a second. Shane is sitting on Ilya's lap facing the table (after lwk getting drunk) with his arms behind his head in Ilya's curls, his hands still.

He turns his head around to look at Ilya and raises his eyebrows before looking at Hayes again.

"I mean, I get what you mean, I miss my wife too, but Roz and Hollzy had to do like 2 years of long distance before coming out, seeing eachother only like a few times a year, ya know." Dykstra says and everyone's like right, yeah, that makes sense I guess and everyone's nodding along.

Except for Shane and Ilya, Shane’s turned red and Ilya's laughing. Every head now turns to them.

"Is he wrong, Roz?" Bood asks from where he's sitting opposite of them.

Instead it's shane who speaks: "You all think me and Ilya got together in 2019?"

"Well yeah it must be something like that, right?" Come all murmurs from around the room.

"First of all, we officially got together in 2017. But we'd been hooking up for way longer before that."

All collective noises around the tone of WHAT HOW I THOUGHT IT WAS IN 2019 WHAT DO YOU MEAN HOOKING UP??

And so Shane is now like "well we hooked up the first time in our rookie seasons"

Everyone's quiet for a second, in shock.

And Ilya stares at him like hes lying and everyone thinks that he's about to put an end to this weird universe. But instead Ilya’s like "no shane, first time was the summer before.

And then the room fucking errupts

[perlukafarinn]

One of the rookies on the Centaurs asking the guys on the team for advice on this girl he's been trying to date. He can't tell if she likes him and is just nervous about taking it to the next level, or if she's trying to let him down easy and he hasn't been able to pick up on it.

He doesn't get much useful advice and soon the guys are arguing about how long you can pursue someone before it starts getting pathetic. Holmberg is at one end of the spectrum at two weeks ("We're rich professional athletes, man, we shouldn't have to try that hard.") and Wyatt Hayes is on the other at three months ("Maybe she likes you but just doesn't want the WAG lifestyle. You need to prove to her that you see her as a person with her own goals separate from yours.")

Then someone notices that Ilya, despite his wealth of experience, hasn't chimed in yet and asks, "What do you think, Cap?"

"Two years."

The entire room goes still.

"What?"

"Two years," Ilya repeats, completely unashamed. "Is not pathetic to go for what you want. Not if you think they're worth it."

In sync, every person in the room turns to look at Shane, who's pretending to fiddle with the laces on his skates, looking pink-faced and vaguely pleased.

Finally, Holmberg turns to the rookie. "Okay, I guess two years is fine if it's Shane Hollander. Is your girl Shane Hollander?"

The poor rookie has no response to that. His girl is, indeed, not literally Shane Hollander.

"Man, gay people move different," LaPointe mutters.

"This is not a gay thing," Troy objects. "This is a Rozanov and Hollander thing."

[justalittlechocolatemilkshake]

Troy being like - I locked down Harris in a matter of months. We are NOT the same.

[liebelesbe]

attaching something to an email is so scary. what if i accidentally put hard-core porn in there. i don't think i have any downloaded but what if i do and i attached it to the email. what then.

[lindleland]

"save me, substance abuse!" i cry. before you can moralize to me about the dangers of addiction, a noble and powerful steed gallops into the room - my horse whom i have named "substance abuse". you learn an important lesson about making assumptions. i snort a line off its back

[nudityandnerdery]

Beautiful, no notes. (Found it on Facebook, tracked it back to Reddit)

[galaxywarp]

[segamascott]

[wcfieldsimpersonator]

talking about how bad everything is in the world and how i want it to be better and my coworker said god would save us

[bigcommunity]

The unemployment rate got people inventing psychological warfare

[mutinsfromthemoon]

shane wakes up from a nap and notices that ilya isn’t in the room, which is incredibly weird because since they arrived in spain, ilya seems to think he’s a part of shane’s body. he gets worried and picks up his phone and sees that ilya sent him a message saying “my beloved sweetheart, i’m down at the dance ballroom learning salsa with incredible ladies” and shane snorts and thinks “that seems like a place where ilya would be”. so he goes after his husband and finds him surrounded by old ladies, dancing with one of them, and one of the ladies notices shane at the door and goes “oh young boy, you haven’t lied, you do have a very good looking husband” and ilya follows her gaze and finds shane and opens a wide grin going “mi amor!” and he apologizes to the lady he was dancing with to go to his husband and another lady says “oh if i was younger that boy right there would be my catch” and ilya turns to her with shane in his arms and goes “ah no, shane is useless with women” and shane slaps him and he keeps going “me on the other hand, i’m for incredible women like you all” and the same lady says “if you didn’t spend the whole hour talking about your husband we would’ve believed you” and ilya fake gasps while shane laughs and goes “don’t say that, my husband already has a big ego” and he smiles and turns to shane who was already looking at him and he kisses his husband while the ladies cheer.