Dear people who feel "stuck" right now: Pick a path, any path, ask questions when you get there. The worst that could happen is getting stuck.
ojovivo

Love Begins

#extradirty

Product Placement
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

Kaledo Art

shark vs the universe
One Nice Bug Per Day
trying on a metaphor

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Xuebing Du
KIROKAZE
taylor price

Janaina Medeiros
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
wallacepolsom

blake kathryn

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NASA

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@venuskitty
Dear people who feel "stuck" right now: Pick a path, any path, ask questions when you get there. The worst that could happen is getting stuck.
I often caught myself projecting onto others
and when they stood their grounds and told me I was wrong about them, I’d blush with embarrassment and keep a day to process my feelings of shame caused by my human limited perspective. Oh dear.
Because, I know what it’s like when people project onto me. I know when they “pretend” to know inner parts of me without giving me their presence nor time to explore me. I use the term “pretend” with quotation marks because I also find myself thinking that I know people only to realize much later that I don’t. And that they don’t either. I don’t even know myself completely sometimes. I say “pretend” because it has a bit of a school kid-like tinge of pain to the energy of the word. I know what it’s like when they don’t see me as I am underneath my layers of separate masks and identities and whatever else the hell my ego mind came up with to masquerade out in the world. And it sucks, because on one hand, it means you’re not being seen and understood with their presence. On the other, it means you’re criticizing them and lord forbid you criticize as a person who practices spirituality......right?
No. Fuck that. Project. Use the term “we” even. Get upset. Get juvenile. Be unforgiving. Throw tantrums and get them thrown right back. Get lost in each other with all the beautiful and ugly aspects of yourself. And when they shoot you down because they say you’re wrong about them, take it. But don’t deny what you saw in them either.
Life is a living meditation, there’s no “un-doing” or “not existing”. There’s no wrong or right way to go about this as much as we can debate about these things for years. It’s an endless expansion of becoming from one starting point in which we call it “God”. And thus, we are merely reflections of each other through the eyes of god. If not, god itself.
Mantras for the healing
I love & approve of myself.
I will no longer abandon myself, I am here for myself.
I am seen & understood beyond my words and actions.
My needs & wants are taken seriously.
I am allowed to focus on what I desire to focus on. The rest, it is safe for me to receive helping hands.
I appreciate and accept myself as I am.
I am safe to validate.
My existence is not a nuisance.
What I can provide are worthy.
My feelings require no justification.
Perks of honoring your highly sensitive nature
- We don’t need to do too much to feel stimulated.
- Music and art is a powerful stimulant for us, packed with all sorts of amazing energy.
- Our brains are wired to plan things ahead for long-term stable pleasure instead of opting for short-term risky pleasure.
- We make fantastic artists/writers/actors/mentors and our work can move others.
- We see various solutions for a problem from all angles.
- It is easy for us to feel thankful.
- We notice tiny details that most people overlook and it amazes them.
- Babies and animals are attracted to our soft nature.
- At intimate situations, people are attracted to our energy and don't understand why.
- Strangers may come to us and find it easy to spill their hearts out.
- We still have a sense of our child-like spirits.
- We're not attracted cheap pleasure (only the wounded ones do, unfortunately)
- Even after being psychologically/emotionally traumatized, we are still capable of digging ourselves out of our own holes.
- We are more susceptible to receiving "AHA!" moments.
- HSPs who are into metaphysics can easily train their extrasensory abilities and tune into spiritual realms.
- Having conversations with other HSPs feels exciting and enriching. It feels amazing to banter our theories around and see it grow.
- If done right, sex is extra awesome.
- We are naturally meditative because of our open and honest energy. We are quicker to dissolve emotional blocks. People who hang out with us long-term soften their resistances without even realizing. (However, severely emotionally wounded people are paranoid when being around us.)
- We love to help others not because we have an ulterior motive, but because it makes us happy (but don't be stupid enough to take advantage of that)
- We are able to spot and steer away from egocentrics, narcissists, sociopaths, histrionics, and psychopaths. (Although HSPs with low self-esteem attract them and keep them around for too long)
- We can pick up energies. Every location, person, and event feels different to us. We immediately know what’s right for us and what our body needs. We are allowed to jump to energetic conclusions (not grounded rationalizations) and judge whether or not we want to stick around. However, it's tricky verbalizing our judgements.
- We make excellent leaders, teachers, and motivational speakers for the younger generation as every generation is more sensitive than the last.
- As extremely sensible people, we see the wants and needs of everyone in the room.
- We’ve all had some kind of paranormal experience at least once in our lives.
- We are excellent manifesters of our realities. At our best, we are naturally able to adapt, shift, and become without thinking about the "step-by-step" process. We are also able to notice synchronicities and emotional trauma cycles in our experiences a lot more frequently than most people.
- We understand things wholly without having to learn too much about it.
- We have interesting and elaborate perspectives and opinions.
- We know what foods are good for us and not good for us without anyone having to tell us.
I just learned something
If I want to share my ideas, I shouldn't "teach" it to others as if they are unknowing. Instead, I should let them put themselves in my shoes by telling them examples from the things I've learned. I should just trust the people with whatever they want to do with the information I gave them.
Perhaps, this would be a better way of expressing myself.
meditation experience #143121513242
Today, I had all these little emotional triggers from when I was a teenager. It was interesting because rationally, I know how to tackle these feelings head on but I realized the heart doesn't really understand the head. At first, I felt like I might spiral into a panic attack and then I realized to let go and surrender to the feeling. So I just let it kind of sit with me for as long as the feeling needed to be there. I don't even remember what I was panicking about but the anxiety went away and transformed itself into something I can detach from to observe. I feel pretty good right now. Something about someone going out of their way to make others dislike me. I knew that wasn't an actual physical threat but I let the feeling sit there and shift into whatever. Allowing myself to feel the "random" feelings that arise within me kind of works like an energetic time machine. Healing by going backwards. I feel like I am embodying my younger self again.
It's kind of refreshing.
After weeks of anxiety
I realized I already am peace. I chased after inner peace so much because I believed it was elsewhere other than myself. So that was what I got, somewhere else. Anxiety. Depression. Lost. Separation. Abandonment. Confusion.
But I am peace. It is not without me. I am everything life is. All its lights, all its shadows. Whole and incomplete at the same time. All I had to do was simply acknowledge it.
To believe a state-of-being was to be obtained because it was not already had is a man-made concept. We already are all that we desire to be. And to chase after it would mean it was eluding us when in reality, it was here within us all along. Stacked within itself with all the other colors and vibrations and energy.
We always had full control of ourselves.
Our fear of being rejected and called "crazy"
It doesn't matter what the "truth" is. The "truth" is always subjected to change. One day, the earth is flat and the next day, it is round. Don’t be afraid to go against what has been collectively agreed upon to follow your very own heart. Your truth should be the one that keeps you young.
All truth passes through three stages: First, it is ridiculed; Second, it is violently opposed; Third, it is accepted as self-evident.
Arthur Schopenhauer (via currentsinbiology)
Time is not linear. It's the "now" that keeps changing on top of itself.
How to meditate and manifest quickly: Every action and "non-action" is a step closer to you finding yourself.
Everything we do in physical action or lack of it is a form of meditation. We do what we can to find answers about ourselves a little more. We search and scurry and strategize for ourselves to gain things that feed the ego that's always hungry. A hungry ego is not “bad” per se, but we yearn for material things and empty titles for deeper reasons. Such as, our need for significance. Perhaps, we'll desperately want a career of service in hopes of making ourselves feel significant. Don’t fret because you’re unemployed with no agenda. Sitting down in your home in silence, listening to your thoughts is just as powerful. If not, more. There will be less steps needed to taken in that case.
People say, “you must do something about it otherwise it won't change itself!” True & untrue. Their way is not the only way and so-called "non-action" is just as effective as action as long as you pay attention to yourself. And if you don’t pay attention, taking action will only be as meaningful as moving things around but not really going anywhere. Even if your hard-headed logic leads you up to that manifestation and your heart is not into it, you’ll never feel fulfilled and it will be a lot of wasted energy. It would feel like grasping that thing you wanted only to see it flee from you not too soon. The process does not need to make sense, so detach yourself from the steps you think you must take.
Of course, you will need to go through some kind of process to get certain things done because you’re born into a third dimensional reality. However, there is nothing engraved in a sacred stone by a divine hand that states manifestation is only achieved through physical momentum. This idea has been assumed by you and your peers as a toddler: “To get yourself from point A to point B, you must crawl there”. Little be knownst to our wildest imaginations, we can be carried there too! Now don’t expect things to "instantly" appear once you call its name. That just won’t make sense on our dimension and you’ll feel like you’re losing your mind. That’s what being dead is for and you’ll get there at some point anyway so don’t worry (heh). What the dead misses the most is the process of making things happen. The journey is what makes the reward delicious. This is why many souls choose to reincarnate. Life as a conscious human being is a great fucking puzzle-rollercoaster gift thing. We're here simply because we wanted to be on the ride. Any other purpose is uniquely of our own.
The path will present itself to us in unconventional (or conventional) ways. As for a universe of inclusion, what you request must come to you as it already exists. Something seems to delude you to believe that you don't have that thing you requested because you have noticed the lack of it in your physical reality. That is the very essence of desire. I know the other gurus must have told you believe and have faith. "Visualize and act as if!", they say. But having faith in something you want but don't feel like you can have is a load of bullshit to the average human being. Yes, you must do some work. Any work. Exercise, studying, networking, writing…whatever you feel like you’re a step closer to truly filling that emptiness. That is meditation. But to truly get there faster, you must be able to sit with yourself in "non-action". The paths may not always be pretty and there may be things that may test your patience, but it is all aspects of you that you need to fall in love with to become whole.
Many city people don’t realize that life does not have to be stressful and fast-paced. Life does not demand you to overextend yourself to the brink of emotional exhaustion. Life does not expect you to violate your own boundaries and force yourself to do things that may take away your loving nature. As a native city-person, I can safely assume that most of us come home after a whole day of shifting around just to find ourselves facing nothing but emptiness and a need to feed that emptiness through distraction. Stop doing that. Stop distracting yourself with things. Things are not important. Because at the end of the day, your emptiness will remind you that it is still unsatisfied. What are things supposed to do for you to patch that emptiness? TV drama marathons to ignore your current reality, hanging out with people you don't like to feel accepted, going to parties you don't really take pleasure in, drinking until your consciousness blacks out, buying things you don't actually want, saying hurtful things to feel in control...all of which are superficial and will not heal you at all. Distraction. Repression. Rejection. Abandonment. Neglecting. Resistance.
So the answer is, be present and surrender to yourself. Being present requires sensitivity, absolute honesty, and an intolerance for intolerance. As a sensitive in an insensitive world, I understand. At first, you'll feel vulnerable and eaten alive. You'll feel like you'll collapse. But be sensitive and validate every damn emotion and you'll be fine, objectively. At first, your ego will strip itself and take down all the unnecessary walls that you've built up over the years. Think of it as sliding a bowling ball down a lane without ramps. The ramps symbolize your presence. Without the ramps, you're blindly throwing bowling balls into the pits and sometimes you'll knock a few pins down but most of the time, you won't. It's frustrating being a bad bowler and even more frustrating when you feel like you suck at life. Raise the ramps and there's your presence. Like the feeling when you get when you use ramps, being sensitive makes you feel invalidated, embarrassed and ashamed. Because ramps are for kids and old inner-child wounds are for the past which we should've grown out of..right? Most of us haven't grown out of our childhood wounds because we suck up our chests every morning to lie to ourselves that we're a big boy (if you wanted to know why it's so hard to get out of bed every morning, there's your answer.) And that's perfectly okay, but don't do that anymore. Rock that kiddie lane.
Even if the bowling ball is going down any direction at any speed, at least it will bounce off the rails and not into the pit this time. The ball colliding with the rails represents your inner conflict. You will find dissonance, you will find collision, but the pits were the things keeping you from where you wanted to be this whole time and at least now, you can bounce back. If you're sensitive with yourself, at least you'll be further than you were where you started no matter how much you think you suck at bowling. Eventually, you'll get yourself to the pins. All you have to do at the very core of it all is observe yourself with compassion. Again, be present. If not, those old repressed and rejected aspects of you will surface into your physical reality in forms of problems or illnesses to force yourself to deal with later on in life. This is why some of us age faster. Once you learn how to rock that kiddie lane, you won’t need for those ramps in order for you to strike because you'll be striking every time.
It will amaze everyone around you but mostly you'll finally be where you're supposed to be.
You know what's wrong with a lot of you guys pertaining to controversy?
It’s the fact that many of you HAVE to choose sides. It’s your refusal to detach yourself and try to see things objectively. Instead, you try to see things with your own past triggered emotions to define the situation. You detest what the opposing side is trying to say because you’re knee-deep in demonizing them along with hundred thousands of other people who you use to validate how you should think. So the minute you let the opposing side say a few things, you jump at it and go crazy and nit-pick at the tiniest things to prove them why they’re horrible and bad and wrong and you’re right. But in all honesty, because life is a reflection of how we treat ourselves, what are you trying to prove to yourself? What could you be possibly fighting yourself about? What are you strongly rejecting and what would happen if you alone (and I mean just you, not anybody else) stopped fighting? No one has ever said anything mean to me about my opinions in the longest while and I’m entirely grateful for that. It was a long painful and emotional journey for me to be in this semi-balanced controversial-thought place and don’t get me wrong, I’m still on it but I’ve grown a lot. I’m also keeping my judgement towards controversy quiet in front of my friends because there’s no need for them to know how I perceive things that are irrelevant to our friendship. My friends in general tend to be very smart and observant people, however. I’m sure they get a gist of what “sides” I’m usually on…but they respect that and let me keep my opinion as my own without their need to invalidate it. I admire that very much in them. How I view things like race and its relations to media sensationalism should not affect how I feel about my friends at all, whatsoever. It’s just that, there’s something about people on Tumblr who so very much need to post very angry things. Their feelings are extremely black and white with little gray area. Don’t get me wrong, I have those moments too. There’s issues I feel incredibly passionate about. But it seems that people desperately need others to validate how they feel so they can fuel each other to keep thinking in one direction. It’s fantastic that you all believe in something really beautiful but in order for your ideas to be whole, you need to look at both sides with complete empathy but at the same time, with objectivity…an open mind (but it’s not what you may think it is). You’re totally allowed to feel whatever you feel, however you want to feel it, for as long as you want to feel it despite what anyone says. BUT if you want to fight for love, do it with love. It’s the fastest way.
So when you make your argument, be sure you don’t construe the facts and don’t exaggerate them. Don’t leave information out just because they don’t serve you in some way. I know you’re angry and passionate and you want others to share your sentiment..but that’s the thing. We need to let ourselves think for ourselves and I can’t emphasize that enough. This whole “don’t be a sheeple” shit is kind of the very thing we say all the time but should be telling ourselves. Every battles out there are even bigger battles within ourselves we need to attend to. I know a lot of people tend to avoid stepping into the shoes of the enemy due to multitudes of psychological reasons: fear of rejection, fear of being “wrong”, fear of succumbing to the “dark side”, fear of who you really are, fear of losing identity.. etc etc. Some may dip a toe and say they understand and don’t give a shit. But I’m asking you guys to walk in these shoes for a week. It’s really difficult and that’s why I usually refrain from investing my emotional well-being pertaining to certain controversial topics unless I personally know from each side. And still, I always find myself never understanding things enough because there’s so much to explore from both worlds. All I know is that I just want to find a place of where I can put my heart at ease. As powerful as ‘thought’ has proven to be, it’s still just a thought at the end of the day. Malleable with all its potential to expand and to be enlightened. Never be afraid to let go of your thoughts as much as you welcome them when they arrive. That’s what meditation basically is. Be the observer of whatever surfaces to mind and surrender to what it wants to become.
I learned to channel and this is what they told me
Channeled from the Pleaidian council: your external image is your energetic visual reference point to your identity. As your name refers to you, your image is a visual signature to call *you* in the sense of what you call “I”. You, as in your perspective of “I”, can change your image as you can change your name. Names have meanings on your planet. Those meanings have an association. This is the same with your image. As you hear your name with your ears, you “hear” your image with your eyes…as in “see”. This is your unique energetic signature. It is as unique and as common as you make it to be. Ultimately with this logic, you look like what you have associated your identity to. You define yourself 100%. If you associate your identity to beauty, you will mirror your idea of beauty in your look. You look like the meaning you gave to identify yourself. Of course, as others will hear and pronounce your name slight differently, they may also see various “versions” of what you look like. This also depends on which frequency plane they are viewing you from. They may never treat you the way you expect them to treat you as you are a unique mirror to each and everyone one of them that hold multiple meanings even at first sight. What they see in your energetic signature is solely up to them. This is not a method to superficiality. As you are aware channeler, things are neither good nor bad from a higher perspective. We are merely providing you our insight in hopes of quelling one of your more dominant vibrations.
So what are you? Are you a person of beauty? Courage? High strung spirit?
Dark Night of the Soul: Identity Crisis
I´m having a crisis, I feel my “awakening pointless and like I´m talking to a wall. I feel death inside, nothing inspires me, I can´t find the fire inside me, no matter what I do. I just dont know what to do anymore.
— indigomotherofdragons
This is know as a point of the Dark Night of the Soul where you are facing your own identity crisis as the old you dissolves and the New Soul is born. As Carl Jung States:
“There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own Soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”
I don’t see this as you facing depression as many would try to self-diagnose you , i see this as you being faced with your shadow self. Ah time to bring out some older articles. Our Shadow Self is the antithesis of our soul, it’s basically the fundamentally aspect of the unconscious that wants to destroy itself. So what happens is you are faced with illusions of the Ego mind that are coming to the surface for clearing. I actually imagine many of us to start going through this again as we enter into the Equinox. The Equinox always brings a deep sometimes dark change and it seems many are starting to face the Dark Night these days…. Anyway this is an article from Carl Jung about the Shadow Self: http://theawakenedstate.tumblr.com/post/74493412736/the-shadow-self-integration-of-the-soul#notes
Also here is some info on the Dark Night of the Soul:
http://www.in5d.com/transmutational-ascension-symptoms.html
http://www.in5d.com/dark-night-of-the-soul.html
http://theawakenedstate.tumblr.com/tagged/dark%20night%20of%20the%20soul
I know i’m throwing a lot of articles at you but this will at least help you understand what is happening to you which will help clarify and give you a deep peace of mind.
The best way to cope through going through an identity crisis is realize that this won’t last forever. The Universe is telling you to look within yourself and face yourself, stepping into your own abyss the good, the bad and the ugly. The fact that you feel death inside leads me to think that you are facing a deep kundalini transformation. The Card of Death in tarot is about change, transformation, death and rebirth, the ending of cycles, transitions into New Beginnings. This may seem like a hard time now but what it is creating is a beautiful new beginning for you. It is the rebirth of your Soul. we seem to be getting themes of Letting Go today but that is truly what the Universe is telling you. The more you cling to the old the more it will cause friction and cognitive dissonance within your life. When we’re able to let go, we release and clear old energy patterns. This is honestly the perfect time to do that because we are headed right into Mercury Retrograde which is always about revisiting our past wounds, past relationships and past old habits. Get ready for lots of Clearing. This is really about Letting Go and learning to embrace the New. You are never truly talking to a wall, your guides, your higher self, We are all listening. Also since you mention fire, the solar plexus came up for me, maybe this is also due to something with your Solar Plexus needing healing. Fire is the element of the Solar Plexus, it is also prone to create depression, feeling lack of willpower, no direction, the maturation of the Ego it is also deeply connected to our Mother. It is the womb of where we are born so naturally when we go through a transformation it would start with clearing out the Solar Plexus because it is one of the most important aspects of learning to Transcend our Ego self. Everything is connected. You should look into some Citrine or Yellow Calcite. Surround yourself with Yellow, you need bright colors back in your life. Find yourself by looking within and letting go of what no longer serves you. Instead of not feeling the fire, find a way to start kindling it again into your life by taking a direction, taking an action even if it’s a simple one. Find the savior instead of the Victim. It sounds to me this is very much like a deficient solar plexus. If you even think about the basics of this, lost identity. Id. Id is the ego. Solar plexus is home to the ego. See all connects ;) here is a similar question pertaining to the solar plexus: http://theawakenedstate.tumblr.com/post/84446902070/solar-plexus-healing#notes
I hope you find peace and happiness soon.
Love and healing light <3
Ash
THIS. THANK YOU. No more silly forced positive shit. That should come naturally and easily if you were truly healed. And PLEASE check out Teal Swan's latest videos on Spirituality 2.0
To my friend.
I admired you, always wanted what you had, was very extremely jealous of you. We started off in the same place. We told each other that we were excited to meet each other. I remember I just wanted to be your friend because you were pretty and you spoke Japanese. When you took your phone out to take selfies with me one day, I realized you had an authentic depth. A genuine love for people and respect towards others. Pretty, both inside and outside. Which sucked a lot for me.
It didn’t take long when you rocketed to fame. Shiny lights and velvet curtains were prepped for you while I was written off on the first round because I simply did not bring up the ratings like you did. For the first three nights after our first encounter, my mind numbed, dreams absolutely crushed — I thought I died inside. I remember laying in bed like a crippled person. After I got written off so quickly without being able to truly shine like how you did, I became a vegetable in a tiny cheap rented room that smelled of mold and cigarettes in a dingy corner of a city that was foreign to me. I imagined you in your winner’s suite, making friends and having cameras focused on you. I secretly blamed you for it. You were absolutely beautiful but you were a horrible singer and I felt like you didn’t deserve to sing because I was better. I hated you as much as I wanted to be just like you. Effortlessly magnetizing and attractive to the world. Surely deserving of love and receiving it too. When you came out on variety shows, commercials and magazines, I didn’t want to look because it was painful. “That could’ve been me”, I told myself every time I saw you dancing in your beautiful outfits, long wavy goddess-like hair and pearly skin. I hated you for coming out randomly on television screens while I am eating my sad fried chicken wings at BonChon. How can someone be so lucky? I hated you because you deserved all the prosperity and positivity that was being attracted to you. Because of this, I didn’t realize how much I actually focused on you while you probably forgot about me not too soon after I got kicked off the show. But thanks to you, a new chapter to my internal journey started that night. At first, I tried to fix external aspects of me in hopes of obtaining the kind of metaphysical magnetism that you had. No matter how many self-help books I read, no matter how much I prayed to multitudes of gods, no matter how much I tried and tried and tried — I found myself being disappointed again and again. I wanted what you had so badly that I could taste it but only to end up feeling like I did not deserve it. You were a huge symbol to me; a person who lives a life of love because life loves her back more — something that felt incredibly untouchable to me. However, I learned what it meant to radiate love and I am still learning today. For the past few days, I heard you were hanging onto life by a thread. A very repressed part of me just wanted you to go away. I wanted to erase you from my mind because you were always that somebody who was better at life and 300 steps ahead of me. I checked the news religiously to check on your condition, if you were awake yet. I imagined you leaving the hospital in your wheelchair with flowers in your arms, looking beautiful despite being banged up. Because with your luck, you would. Of course you would.
However, you didn’t.
You died today and I bursted out in tears and had to hide so no one can see me. I didn’t want to because it’s not like I mattered to you as much as you apparently do to me. I didn’t realize how much I wanted you to stay here on earth. Who do I compare myself to now? Your passing feels like a pen pal who got disconnected and never came back online. It feels really weird that you’re suddenly not here anymore...How can a star shine and radiate so brightly and suddenly disappear? Life is…so..unpredictable. I guess that’s it….and…
I’m so sad..
……………
…….
I know you are at peace now. You are probably reunited again with your dad whom you’ve missed so much. Rise, you are a major symbol of the beginning of a new chapter of my spiritual journey. I thank you with all my heart for doing so. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have cared as much to seek meaning and purpose in myself as much as I do now. I wouldn’t have tossed and turned and struggled for awareness and love like the kind I saw in your eyes. I would’ve merely existed as a sleeping sheeple and not even realize I can create my own world if it weren’t for you. I actually know how to feel things now little by little and I’ve learned to live life from the heart. Thank you for teaching me. So.. Bye, RiSe. Bye, my friend.
World's current illness
Our reality faces a serious imbalance called "lack". We believe don't have enough money, we don't have enough resources, we don't have enough love, we don't have enough time, we don't have enough energy. And thus, we compete. We lie. We cheat. We take advantage of each other and sometimes do really dumb petty things out of feelings of lack. However, I have complete faith in where we're all headed collectively. There's been more awareness to a lot of social issues. Love and acceptance really does solve a lot of problems. I've been in a really dark place for a while now and called it "spiritual depression" when in all honesty, no one really knows what being "spiritual" truly looks like. I gave myself a week off from thinking or trying to become. It's working. Maybe we need to fight our fights and define "spirituality" on our own. No outdated books. No bestselling author gurus. No dumb motivational quotes from instagram.
We need to wake up in the morning and churn the butter and boil teas in our kettle. We need to face the grind and complain about our mondays. We need to see our enemy's faces and tell them we don't like them. We need to quit jobs and find better ones. We need to struggle with our confidence and throw friends away and splurge on things we wanted to buy. We need to order take out because cooking dinner just doesn't seem to vibe tonight. We need to binge watch Netflix and gossip about some celebrity's irrelevant lives to forget about our own. Just doing shitty human things and just existing. Being flawed is absolutely refreshing. Letting myself be my flaws feels liberating. Maybe that's why we're here. To feel the freedom of being absolutely imperfect. To constantly disappoint ourselves with inflated ideas of self-perfection. Maybe, true spirituality lies somewhere in our human experience of wanting material things and being totally bumfucked annoyed for not having it and acting like we're all tough and smart to save ourselves.
Yeah, I'm in a really weird place but it feels nice here.
conquer yourself
Over the years, we’ve learned to not victimize ourselves from other people’s projections. Now, we must learn how to not victimize ourselves from our own emotions. You feel negative? Own it. You feel happy even though you think you shouldn’t be? Own it. You are experiencing another anxiety attack? Own that fucking shit. You are an intelligent self-thinking spiritual being. But before all of that, you’re a fucking beast. A fucking animal. And you’ve survived it all these years. Keep fighting. Inner-peace is what you strive for but fight is what brings you alive. Make all the mistakes you need to make because we’re here to learn. You only experience this very ego-identity once.
Dump everything everyone told you about being a spiritual being and get back to the basics.