Because Whatever @vexofthewest - Tumblr Blog

Posts

thetrippytrip

I can’t believe they oblitered straight men like that

castlevanian

@tabbran please add lemon man story to this

tabbran

PRESENTING LEMON MAN

themightyglamazon

That was a wild goddamn ride

wereralph

god this was worth the read

reeshahasha

Yes this is long but I promise you the story of lemon man is worth knowing. And reblogging.

actuallyjuststealingmemes

What a ride

buckyeah

I summoned a shitload of willpower to continue this despite my ADD. WORTH IT

this-account-is-a-mistake

l e m o n m a n

epsilonhybrid

Lemon man: ALL women and GAY MEN cannot do SHIT they are all USSELESS and yalls business will FAIL unless you have a MAN in CHARGE

jj: lmao what

Lemon man: what???? huh?????? u triggered?????????

jj: whatever you say lemon man

lemon man:

pretty-frown-deactivated2026011

GOD TIER POST RIGHT HERE

watercolourferns

Nice ending for this…

yuna-dan

Wow that was a ride

dechart

OK. Pls pls pls, read the whole thing. It’s legendary.

overworked-strawberry

IM SHAKING

arthropoidangst

3m0-r4bb1t

holy shit what a ride

dykewallpaper

[ID: a very long twitter thread telling the story of the very angry “lemon” man.

Thread begins with a tweet by @that1mum that reads, “Starting a girls only gym that plays early 2000′s pop music and we can all compliment each others butts and not get catcalled/stared at by dudes. And gay boys are invited.” Replies by @Yunghonch @ waddupk and @Kat_22M, in that order, read: “GG&G Gals, gays, and gains,” “petition to call it The G Spot,” and “It’s perfect, they’ll never find it.” This is followed by a picture of a Black student at a desk with a textbook open in front of them- they are wearing a blue polo shirt and overalls- and they are leaning their head on their hand with a shocked expression on their face.

The narration of the lemon man story is told through tweets by @markiplayer, or JJ, starting with the tweet, “here is the story of the lemon man, it all started with my tweet that went viral.” Attached is the tweets and image from above with the addition by JJ that reads, “I can’t believe they obliterated straight men like that.” The story continues: “because of this tweet I’ve had conversations ((arguments)) with countless people who are offended by my tweet. One of these people… was the lemon man. The conversation began with a sexist comment, so we’re off to a great start.” Shown is a reply to viral tweet by JJ by Twitter user, @22CVR22 who’s username is the positive graph emoji and two lemon emojis. It reads, “Business would flop if women were in charge, get a male CEO to oversee it and this could be a big success.” The narration continues: “The conversation continued along with the sexist comments to my utter disbelief” followed by a reply by JJ to the sexist comment that reads, “Hey bro, I have a suggestion for you. You should close your mouth and never open it again. Ever. Thanks.” He replies, “What? I was trying to help the idea? Women don’t perform well in CEO roles. Gay men are untested in CEO roles. It’s a man’s job.” JJ replies, “Echhhhhhh keep your gross sexist statements away from me my dude I could honestly care less.” He then replies again, “Well when your business flops because a women was too busy painting her nails to file taxes don’t moan at me, I tried to help.” To which JJ replies: “Hey. Bud. Listen. Stop mansplaining shit to me, this isn’t a real gym, you’re just using it as an excuse to undermine women. So hush.” He says, “Sounds like someone’s getting triggered. I put you under a bit of pressure and you’re folding. This is why this business will fail.” JJ responds, “Is this serious? Like, am I actually alive right now and someone genuinely tweeted this at me? I swear to god I’m making this shit up.”

The narration from before continues, in all caps: “And then it happened. The offending tweet.” The guy who left the sexist comment says, “Your business will fail without men. There’s a reason running a business is considered a man’s job.” To which JJ replies with the “offending” tweet: “Listen lemon man. I don’t care what you think. Women are amazing and can do whatever we put our mind to, keep your gender roles to yourself.” JJ’s narration reads, in all caps, “Lemon man did not like being called lemon man. And thus it began.” Lemon man replies to the offending tweet with: “Call me lemon man again and you’ll be reported to twitter for harassment.” JJ’s narration reads, “Obviously, that was hilarious. So I kept making jokes about it, as you do. Here’s one of them.”

Followed is a tweet by JJ that features an emoji man, whose body is made of lemons and whose head is the cowboy emoji. Text reads, “Howdy. I’m the lemon sheriff. Call me lemon man again and you’ll be reported to twi.” To which lemon man replies: “You really spent 15 minutes making this. Sums up why women aren’t suited to high pressure jobs, wasting time on stuff like this.” JJ’s narration reads in all caps, “He anger.” Followed is JJ’s tweet, “Howdy. I’m the lemon sheriff. Call me lemon man again and you’ll be reported to twitter for harassment.” Lemon man’s response is, in all caps, “Fucking stop with the lemon stuff.”

JJ’s narration continues in all caps: “And then lemon man decides that his “friend that works at twitter” is going to ban my account for calling him lemon man. LMFAO okay.” JJ responds to lemon man’s last tweet with, “I’m sorry lemon man it’s just… really, ridiculously funny.” Lemon man replies, “Sure, we’ll see if it’s funny when in 10 minutes my buddy deletes your account. He’s in a high position at Twitter. Idiot.” JJ replies, “But lemon man, this is just a fun and friendly conversation between two people. Who’s your friend? Show me the test conversation for proof.” To which lemon man replies, “You know what, I was joking. I wasn’t gonna get you banned. Now you’ve pissed me off. I am texting him RIGHT NOW. Too late to say sorry.” JJ says, “??? Lemon man, here’s a friendly suggestion. Take the L(emon) and just leave my mentions and this’ll all go away.” Lemon man responds, “HAHAHAH your account is going to be banned shortly. Was it really worth calling me lemon man?” attached is a test conversation, lemon man says, “Yo bro are you in work ATM? If you get the chance can you ban the account @markiplayer for me? Typical feminist idiot harassing me.” The person lemon man is texting says, “Hey bro, yest I’m at work. Of course I can what exactly happened though?” Lemon man responds, “She keeps calling me lemon man and saying I’m a sexist, it’s really pissed me off. She’s gone too far.” The person responds, “Say no more, we do not tolerate that kind of behavior. Her account WILL be closed.” Lemon man says, “Thanks man. I’ll se you.”

JJ’s narration of the story continues: “Meanwhile, my friends are getting wind of what’s happening. Hundreds to ‘lemon man’s’ poured into both mine and his notifications. I literally cannot believe how many people played into this lemon man joke. It was INCREDIBLE. After a while of these jokes Lemon Man asked me to dm him. I have nothing to lose, so of course I obliged.” Attached is an image of a dm conversation, JJ says, “What’s up lemon man,” and lemon man replies, “This has gone way too far now. Even your apology you continued to make fun of me. Before today my twitter account was highly regarded as a beacon of truth with some hard hitting opinions. Today you’ve completely ruined it and turned me into a fruit meme. I asked for you to apologize and you couldn’t even do that. If you don’t start showing some respect and stop making me a lemon meme I’ll be contacting my lawyer to see if I have grounds to sue on defamation of character as you’ve ruined my accounts reputation.”

JJ’s narration continues with lemon man jokes. The first one by @oldyeller reads, “’yeah I want to sue this girl on twitter’ ‘why?’ ‘she called me lemon man and it made me sad’” The second one by JJ reads, “’Lemon man, ya gotta respect women.’ ‘If she breathes, she a thot.’…” JJ’s narration reads, “the jokes just kept coming this was SO FUNNY.” Lemon man tweets, “As a show of defiance in the face of an army of feminist trolls I have decided to add a second lemon to my name. @markiplayer you clown that’s the strength of my masculinity. I don’t back down when the going gets tough. Is lemon man all you’ve got your horrible idiots.” @MichaelMorarity replies, “One lemon for each of your tiny sour balls.” Lemon man replies with: “Never EVER talk about my balls again if you’re gay. I am straight. That’s disgusting.” @MichaelMorarity replies: “Suck my tasty gay dick, lemon boy,” with an image attached of a person pointing at a camera. @oldyeller makes a tweet that reads, “Don’t say his name of he’ll report you to twitter for harassment.” Attached is an orange horror movie poster with a figure in black robes standing outside. On their clothes is lemon man’s monologue from the dm screenshots about his reputation.

JJ’s narration continues in all caps: “And then someone made a groupchat with him in it. A lot happened but this was the best part. Lemon man really sent this message.” Attached is an image of a message by lemon man in a group chat named, “lemon crew” that reads, “Is anyone here FEMALE (no gays), over 18 and in London? I would be interested in taking you out for drinks provided you’re at least a 7/10.” JJ’s narration reads, “Lemon Man also used some slurs in the groupchat, but apparently he didn’t know so he apologized for that. Smh Lemon Man. Anyways, time goes on. He dms me a bunch. Threatens to sue me. And then he sends me this:” Attached is an image of what looks like a letter that reads, “Dear Sir/Madam, This is James Roberts of Kingston Napperly Law Firm contacting you today on behalf of a client of mine. He has today alleged that you have created a campaign of propaganda and insults designed to lower his reputation and standing across social media. I would like to let you know that this behavior will not be tolerated. If this targeted campaign continues you can expect formal proceedings to begin. The slur “lemon man” has upset my client greatly to the point he feels unable to use social media anymore. He is far from the lemon man and sexist he has been portrayed to be. I urge you to immediately stop. Yours sincerely, James Roberts.”

JJ’s narration of the story continues: “Wasn’t real, by the way, in case you were wondering. And then out of fucking nowhere he sends this.” Attached is an image of a message from lemon man that reads, “I could see us getting married in like a decade.” JJ continues narrating: “At this point I have no idea if I’m on drugs and just imagining this whole day because oh my GOD.” Another screenshot shows more messages between the two, lemon man says, “My lawyers have been through every tweet mentioning the words ‘lemon boy’ in the last 12 hours and says there have been over 3000 instances of its use. That’s ridiculous.” JJ replies, “Um incorrect. It’s lemon MAN, you’re an adult, not a boy.” Lemon man responds, “Sorry lemon man. I forgot.”

JJ continues narrating: “Eventually, I get pretty sick and tired of Lemon Man’s shit. I decide to put the day to an end.” We see another screenshot of messages. Lemon man says, “I’m on private so I can discuss with my team how to tackle the lemon man issue.” JJ replies, “Okay lemon man, enough is enough. Although I’ve had an eventful day with your antics, I am officially done. Goodbye lemon man. I’ll remember you in my dreams.” We see an image of lemon man’s twitter account, it is now a private account. JJ continues their story, in all caps: “I forgot to say he literally asked me for money because I made followers.” We get one last screenshot of a message from lemon man: “you gained about 200 followers from making me a meme, if I give you my paypal could you put some money in? Not really fair you gain followers and I get nothing but people who think I’m a joke.” JJ finishes their story with: “And that is the story of how I started a revolution by calling some random sexist guy on twitter Lemon Man.”

Next image used is a screenshot of a YouTube video titled, “I Was Threatened.” Another screenshot is of lemon man’s twitter profile; their account has been suspended. End of ID]

whitepeopletwitter

jus-tea

Daddy’s at the food store, Mummy’s out of town,

She’s working at the hospital since Rhona came to town,

Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to town,

Hide away, hide away, she’s come to take us down.

Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep 6 feet away,

But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,

Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay,

Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.

But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,

And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say,

Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away,

Hide away, hide away, she took us down today.

roseverdict

[Image ID: Tumblr user @neanderthyall says in the notes, “I thought that 6 feet was kind of a double meaning. Like six feet away to stop the spread, but when people die they’re six feet underground, and its six feet of the dirt that keeps you apart. Like ‘Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts Hide away, hide away, or the six feet will be dirt’.” End ID.]

HI DON’T LEAVE THIS IN THE NOTES THAT’S ACTUALLY BRILLIANT

billpottsismygf

I’ve taken the liberty of expanding the lyrics slightly and coming up with a tune:

Daddy’s at the food store, Mummy’s out of town, She’s working at the hospital since Rhona came to town, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to town, Hide away, hide away, she’s come to take us down.

Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep 6 feet away, But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay, Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.

I need to see the sunlight, I’ve not been out in days And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say, Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away, Hide away, hide away, she took us down today

The days all run together, I haven’t changed my shirt We may be getting restless, but keep on the alert Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts Hide away, hide away, or the six feet will be dirt

jus-tea

@billpottsismygf’s extended version. A beautiful singing voice 🎶☺️

billpottsismygf

As planned I’ve extended this even further and re-recorded it with the new lyrics and a guitar part; it’s also a bit better quality. It’s so cool that so many different versions of this song have sprung up already! I recommend having a scroll through them all on @jus-tea‘s tumblr.

(Em)Daddy’s at the (B7)food store, (Em)Mummy’s out of (B7)town, She’s (Em)working at the (B7)hospital since (Em)Rhona (B7)came to (Em)town, (Am)Hide away, hide away, Miss (Em)Rhona’s come to town, (Am)Hide away, (Em)hide away, she’s come to (B7)take us (Em)down.

Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep six feet away, But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her one today, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay, Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.

I’m missing all my friends, though we keep in touch by phone, I’m learning what it is to truly be alone, Hide away, hide away, even though you moan, Hide away, hide away, or we’ll be lying prone.

My love she says she misses the twinkle of my eyes, But Rhona stalks the streets and to meet would be unwise, Hide away, hide away, we hear the desperate cries, Hide away, hide away, or see the bodies rise.

I feel myself a-coughin’, I haven’t got a mask, It’s work or die for me, though, so who am I to ask, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s on the task, Hide away, hide away, she’s come for me at last.

I need to see the sunlight, I’ve not been out in days, And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say, Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away, Hide away, hide away, she took us down today.

The days all run together, I haven’t changed my shirt, We may be getting restless, but keep on the alert, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s quite the flirt, Hide away, hide away, her touch is not inert.

Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts, Hide away, hide away, or six feet will be dirt.

karenusia

Damn. I am speachless.

sorawinthyr

This is no longer a children’s tune. It’s a bards ballad.

breelandwalker

This is HAUNTING.

illknight

i am just finding out abt this but hey maybe see if you can help out the Atlanta Solidarity Fund at http://atlsolidarity.org/

illknight

we’re all excited about blue georgia, but too close to overlooking the backlash for the work black activists have done there

also here’s the link provided in the second tweet

https://actionnetwork.org/fundraising/contribute-to-the-atlanta-solidarity-fund

The Atlanta Solidarity Fund bails out activists who are arrested for participating in social justice movements, and helps them get access

valtsv

character in a fight scene: *restrains their opponent by pinning them against the wall by their wrists*

me:

icantwritegood

character in a fight scene: *pins their opponent down by straddling their waist and holding their wrists to the floor*

me:

ladylike-foxes

character in a fight scene: *lifting their disarmed opponent’s chin slightly with the business end of their weapon*

me:

g3ncyho3

character in fight scene: *pins down the opponent and leans in close to whisper in their ear*

me:

breyito

character in fight scene: *restrains the opponent by twisting their arm/s behind their back and pinning them to the wall chest first with their own chest pressing against the opponents back*

me:

abandoned-as-mustard

Character: *distracts their otherwise equally good/better opponent by flirting*

Me:

bmarvels

Character in fighting scene: *restrains opponents arms in a lock hold with their own, entangling their arms together forcing their bodies to be pressed together and faces in close proximity*

lime-on-my-side

character in fight scene: *holds opponent by the collar, lifts them and brings them close to their face*

me:

miqojak

Every time this crosses my dash it gets better.

brattylikestoeat

Mute this. The music is annoying.

Follow @brattylikestoeat for more.

spaghetti-doodle413

this is what insomnia sounds like

paprikanoir-deactivated20190515

Soundtrack of Executive Dysfunction.

thehighpriestofreverseracism

fam I’m over here having a laughing fit, tf is this music😭

noblepeasant

I have not known peace since I heard this song. Snakes have begun manifesting physically in my house.

raccoon-boy

It sounds like a sped up video game track

brakken

skeletons

alinahazy

THIS IS WHAT I WANT ON NY HALOWEEN DASH OMG

alinahazy

I’ll never stop reblogging this

chiaroart

I told myself I’d wait until October to start putting halloween stuff on my blog. I’m a dirty liar.

i-hate-chick-fil-a

Not to mention the fact that Mrs. White isn’t qualified to teach. She should be required to take a remedial English course. “I have went”? please. It’s “I have gone”, Mrs. White.

first, my kid would not sign anything without me seeing it first. 2nd, upon seeing it i would be at the superintendant’s office the next morning. then we would speak to the teacher. black folk gotta nip it in the bud.

holy-jeez-its-matt

Dont let your children be controlled like this. I remember back when I was in school my mom always told me “if you really need to use the bathroom or attend to an emergency and the teacher won’t let you, then just leave the classroom and I’ll deal with teacher and principle”

Mom had my back

sandersstudies

If I was this kid I would use up those passes and then just fuckin’ throw up or get a severe nosebleed in the classroom and then refuse to leave because “sorry, I can’t go to the nurse, I already used up my two passes for the fucking MONTH”

xenoqueer

There was a student at my high school, who we will call John Doe, who actually did that. When teachers gave him a limited number of bathroom allowances (usually 3 per semester, which was the standard at my school), he would use them in the first week, and then induce vomitting my eating rotten food he found around the school garbage cans. If teachers refused to let him go, he would just throw up on something they had to touch. Light switches, keyboards, whatever was available.

Instead of making admin do anything about this toxic policy, they just doubled down harder, to the extent that one girl politely informed a teacher that she felt like she might be about to have a seizure and could she go to the nurse, please. She was denied, sat back down at her desk, and promptly passed out and concussed herself on the concrete floor when she fell.

Another girl had severe vertigo-induced fainting, could not get a teacher to excuse her from a phys ed class, and fell off a monkey bars and split her head open, and nearly lost an eye because her glasses broke when she landed.

A student with, I believe, diabetes had a severe blood sugar drop and tried to eat a candy bar in a class with a “no food or drinks” rule. The candy bar was taken away, and she had to be taken out by EMTs.

This kind of human rights abuse in public schools is not new. I graduated a full decade ago.

I’m glad it’s being publically discussed again, (briefly around 2003-2005 this was also a popular subject of discussion). I hope that this time, concrete changes in policy are actually affected.

theeldritchbeesechurger

yo what the FVCK is wrong with schools

dorklesblog

They’re run by evil boomers who lick dry tree trunks

dorklesblog

What the fuck did I just even say

theeldritchbeesechurger

No no it made sense

thepoetrytheorist

Unfortunately, there isn’t much children or their guardians can do. Children literally do not have the same rights, especially in regards of freedom of action and speech, as adults do, while children are at school.

7thedisasterdyke

your reminder that the US didn’t ratify the convention of the rights of the child

the only other country that just outright didn’t ratify it was Somalia

republicans especially have been blocking it, citing “parental rights” will be taken away

amari-omaru

Please repost and share this information.

This is very scary and concerning for black people. AGAIN DEHUMANIZING BLACK PEOPLE

Black people health conditions aren't taken seriously compared to others.Many black people are scared to go to the hospital for this reason

Black women are 4x likely to die from complications of childbirth than white women in the United states.they've had experience that has unacceptably poor maternal health outcomes

say-prettyy-pleasee

I remember being in nursing school and part of the cultural competency lesson covered pain tolerance for different races. (I worked in the hospital and my teacher was the Asst Nurse Manager in labor and delivery) She taught us that Asians and Black people had a higher pain tolerance than other races so they could handle it better

ai-yo

2016 is when they changed the medical books to stop saying we don't feel Pain

catchymemes

Fisheye Placebo by Yuumei

coffinwlw-deactivated20191114

HEY SO LOTS OF PPL DONT KNOW THIS BUT THE ARTIST WAS SHADOWBANNED FROM INSTAGRAM AFTER POSTING THIS!!!!

PLEASE SUPPORT THEM!!

revolutionarykoolaid

NO JUSTICE, NO PEACE (9/23/20): Breonna Taylor’s life mattered. There is no justice to be found under this neocolonial system. We must bring it to its knees.

yorksilk

What Girls Look For In An Engagement Ring:

no:

yes:

(source for frog ring)

catchymemes

someemochick

Let us not forget the greatest real-life bard of all time.

justanotherwriter69

Reblogging this because people need to know about the original Badass Bisexual

is-it-mungojerry-or-rumpelteazer

She did that. She was also so extra she had to be pardoned by the King of France… twice. -The first time it was because of the aforementioned “breaking and entering a convent to flee with a novice while also putting a dead nun in her bed [that she had previously dug up from the nearby cemetery] and setting fire to the convent just in case”. -The second time it was because she went to a Royal Ball and spent so much time flirting with a high society girl so overtly that three of her suitors challenged her to a duel. She fought the three of them at once and then went back in to continue flirting with the girl. She apparently hadn’t considered the small fact that duels were outlawed, and that maybe having three duels on the Royal Palace gardens wasn’t the best idea ever? Luckily for her Louis XIV found her hilarious and he pardoned her a second time. -She also gained her living for a while by doing ‘singing and dueling demonstrations’. As in dueling and singing mocking songs about the guys she was dueling at the same time. - Apparently, during her time at the Opera, she challenged to duels all the nobles who tried to molest the chorus girls. When she realized they went around saying “they had been mugged by a gang” to cover for the fact that they had been crushed by an opera singer, she started taking small objects from them and returning them in front of everyone, “you forgot this when I beat you up” style. - When the woman she loved the most in her life died, she apparently retired from public life… to a convent. She died at 33 (37 according to other sources).

If you want more details about Julie d’Aubigny, aka Madame de Maupin, and you speak Spanish, there is this twitter thread that gives all the information above and more. Warning, though, it uses quite a lot of slang.