Sade Olutola
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#extradirty
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@weareweirdpeople
"y'all need to be put on a watchlist lor liking this stuff" then you need to be put on one for liking shows where people try to kill each other! fiction DOES affect reality, you're probably gonna commit mass murder if you watch shows like that! oh your favorite character is the VILLAIN too? oh i just KNOW you'd kill a person. /sarc
"You just don't get it, I gotta take my frustration out via lateral violence and 4chan slur usage as a transfemist because we have it worse!!!! Those we call slurs and mock are ackshually taken more seriously and have it way easier!!1!!"
people love to forget that emotional incest is a real and true form of incest that exists because if the consanguineous pair in question does not explicitly say in the text "we are in romantic love" or "we have physical sexual contact" people will say that at most, the incest is subtext. when it's literally text. it's text!
let's all read about enmeshment and apply it to literary analysis together <3
ID: Enmeshment is a concept in psychology and psychotherapy introduced by Salvador Minuchin to describe families where personal boundaries are diffused, sub-systems undifferentiated, and over-concern for others leads to a loss of autonomous development. According to this hypothesis, by being enmeshed in parental needs, trapped in a discrepant role function, a child may lose their capacity for self-direction; their own distinctiveness, under the weight of "psychic incest"; and, if family pressures increase, may end up becoming the identified patient or family scapegoat. Enmeshment was also used by John Bradshaw to describe a state of cross-generational bonding within a family, whereby a child (usually of the opposite sex) becomes a surrogate spouse for their mother or father. The term is sometimes applied to engulfing codependent relationships, where an unhealthy symbiosis is in existence. end ID
in conversation about white people who go to Japan and expect their knowledge of anime to culturally carry them, I was once posed with āitās like if there was a Japanese guy who was obsessed with spongebob and came over here and thought he could get by just communicating in spongebob quotes.ā This is a false equivalence because if such a man existed we would crown him king. Weād love him. Americans would fucking love that. sometimes I get sad that this isnāt a real guy I can invite to a party.
Ok the last one got me laughing actually
I've said this more eloquently before but I'm going to say it again bc I feel strongly about it.
This is normal. America is not special for being mostly chill about these things. Americans are conflating the reactions of minorities living in America's (understandable) reactions to racial stereotypes and cultural appropriation with how that same group feels about the same when they are the majority culture. Japanese people living in Japan aren't offended by overly enthusiastic foreigners who have watched too much anime, unless the people in question are also creepy and rude. I find that these posts really betray this idea of American exceptionalism while also being really offensive bc the indirect implication is that other people are soo uptight, and the other people in question are mimorities. There's just a huge gap in experience between minority and majority culture...
Also "it's very hard to insult Americans in a way that hurts our feelings" is kind of funny bc the amount of offense I see taken all the time to stereotypes about America is actually wild, but that's another question.... Like to be clear I don't think this is uniquely American, it's just that the English internet is so American that if you say something, a lot of folks will come crawling out of the wood work.... But still.
I don't know. Just getting really annoyed with how often I see variations on the same post of "Americans are sooooo Chill" usually always juxtaposed with the Japanese.
Rubs me the wrong way. I'm tired though so I'm not sure I'm making much sense rn.
Also I can assure you that Americans living in Japan regularly get very very offended by a lot of stereotypes that Japanese people have about them, and how this is reflected. That's bc, again, minorities tend to feel more strongly about these things. Which makes sense.
"we care about victims!"
if you only care about the "ideal" or "perfect" victim, you don't care about victims. if you call anyone you don't like a predator/abuser/groomer/etc, you don't care about victims. if you compare words on a page or screen to actual abuse, you don't care about victims. if you tell victims that they deserved to be abused/victimised, you don't care about victims. if your "support" is conditional, you don't care about victims.
a lot of people in the age-regression community seem very interested in upholding this sort of āpurityā (iām not kidding iāve seen many people use the term āimpure littleā for people who do drugs or swear while in littlespace) and i think we need to finally address how straight up not okay it is.
i watched in real time as age regression began to become more widespread, and people began to use ageplay communities as their scapegoat towards normalcy. āiām an age regressor, but iām not like one of those FREAKS who sexualizes itā or āage regression and abdl are Completely different things with absolutely no overlap at all.ā going so far as to make the default age regression flag specifically the āsfw age regression flagā (in what way is being age regressed Safe For Work? think about the terms you are using for two seconds) half of the age regression communities saying not to interact if you even Sometimes participate in kink, or if youāre even supportive of people who do. demanding people keep it āchild friendlyā completely avoiding any conversation about how loaded of a term that is to be using with no elaboration.
iāve seen people who are into completely nonsexual age regression get ostracized for wearing diapers while regressed. because itās ātoo kink-adjacent.ā call out posts are written about them. there are blocklists for regressors who are too weird, too kinky, too āadult,ā and so many of the people being called out are perma-regressors! people who are always regressed in some way, completely ostracized from their own community for the crime of having an adult body and adult body needs.
iāve seen almost every resource on age regression refer to overlap between age regression and kink be described as āinherently traumatizing,ā completely ignoring the wide variety of ways people can experience age regression, and especially, even if you Do believe it was āinherently traumatizingā for someone in littlespace to have sex, i donāt think i have ever seen any manor of exception made for middle regressors, probably because i frankly have never seen anyone ever acknowledge middle regressors in any sort of meaningful way. (this oneās for you middle regressors, i see you!)
it is totally fine to experience age regression in whatever way you experience it. iām not saying you Have to get sexual about it. you donāt even have to be ok with seeing it. but you do have to be okay with the knowledge that there are kinky age regressors and they arenāt doing anything wrong. you do not get to excuse your puritanical worldview with your age regression. frankly, some of you need to be really unpacking what you think it means to be a child.
i am so tired of this community being so restrictive like this. iām plural, iāve seen the ācan littles consentā debate play out 100 times over. you all need to get more comfortable with the idea that everyone is different and you donāt get to decide what someone elseās boundaries should be. the experience of age regression often overlaps with ageplay and frankly you should get the fuck over it. there are going to be people who do things you donāt like. LIVE WITH IT.
āwhy arenāt you agreeing with me when I go out of my way to search for fictional things that I donāt likeāfictional things that donāt affect me or anyone in real life in any way, shape or formāso that I can harass real people over these fictional things and feel morally superior about myself?????? why canāt you see that I am the victim here???????ā
classic antisā and puritansā mindset that some people in fandom and fanfic space unironically have
dislike how many mental health posts on here are just "you've never done anything wrong in your life ever and they were evil for that"
maybe you did do something wrong. maybe you hurt someone. maybe you have said awful things. maybe you were just as bad as them. maybe. but what matters is that you move on. you have to try. you have to wake up and be kinder. you have to learn and listen and grow. maybe you did do something wrong but that doesn't mean you have to keep doing that. as long as you are alive, you can change
Iām reading The Deviants War: The Homosexual vs The United States of America and the entire point of gay pride as a concept comes from police raids on bars, clubs, public restrooms, etc where gays were humiliated and outed in the newspapers (sometimes with their addresses!) and had careers ruined and lives upended by being associated with perversion and vice squads and all that and they responded by going āno Iām proudā and took that pride to the streets in defiance of the huge mechanism of shame that existed to oppress the gay community into obscurity and so the fact that people are now trying to apply conservative dogma to pride parades to make them āsafe for childrenā or in other words āsafe for people with oppressive conservative valuesā is simply insane
To phrase this more clearly: āpublic indecencyā laws were the primary tool for brutally enforcing gender and sexual conformity, so applying a āpublic indecencyā lens to pride parades of all things is a slap in the face of everyone who ever suffered under gender & sexual oppression and took their anger (and yes their pride!) to the streets. If it makes you uneasy or uncomfortable maybe youāre not on the side you think you are!
tags by taibhsearachd: #some of you people would have the vapors at the thought of a slut walk #and that's a PROBLEM
in conversation about white people who go to Japan and expect their knowledge of anime to culturally carry them, I was once posed with āitās like if there was a Japanese guy who was obsessed with spongebob and came over here and thought he could get by just communicating in spongebob quotes.ā This is a false equivalence because if such a man existed we would crown him king. Weād love him. Americans would fucking love that. sometimes I get sad that this isnāt a real guy I can invite to a party.
Ok the last one got me laughing actually
in my little pony universe youd go to a job interview and theyd be like so how does your cutiemark reflect your dedication to this position. And every time youd have to spew some bullshit about how your cutiemark of two tennis rackets actually means youre a team player and good at multitasking and view the market like a playing field. or whatever. and you wouldnt even get the job
Thanks to Equestria v Sugar Sprinkle, cutie mark interview questions are considered hiring discrimination, so if anypony asks you any cutiemark related questions or even alludes to any questions about your cutiemark such as "In your own words, describe your life purpose" you can and should refuse to answer. Know your rights, ponies.
Wonderful photo
like we all know trans women have it harder. but this is the fault of the patriarchy and an underdeveloped transfeminist approach which fails these women in going past terminology and into making something that helps trans women survive.
transfeminism cant just be your individual analysis, it has to be community led events and jobs and support systems. and there is none of that under the name of transfeminism. all of it is disorganized. the reason trans men tend to have it a bit better is because of their surplus in organizing (https://www.transmascstories.com/resources) and because of a developed feminism/butch acceptance. while this feminism has historically aided in harming trans men, those same men educated themselves through years of analyzing anti-transmasculinity through all aspects, including the lens of sometimes being AFAB. (https://labelgame.blogspot.com/2010/12/transmisandry.html, it has def outdated arguments)
people hate the fact that trans men are able to be harmed for their assignment because theyre supposed to be men, unwavering men. but talking about it is how they were able to have a seat at the table because god knows no one respects their manhood, trans or not. imagine having to out yourself, say you have a vagina, everytime for some cis woman to include you in their feminism? even worse if you pass/post-op (Tony, a post-op ftm supporting his sisters later in this essay at Mitchfest.)
trans women have it harder because transfeminism has lacked proper flowering and that sucks. yet when most of the weeds come from the patriarchy, some point at TMEs. pointing at the wrong target quite literally kills your movement.
not saying trans women suck at this im saying trans women arent protected under feminism the same way trans men are protecting themselves through transandrophobia theory. but they wont (and havent) get anywhere by ignoring the patriarchy and intersectionality.
I heavily disagree that trans women and transfems have it harder. If you look at the way that anti-trans legislation is being enforced, it's pretty even across the board. All trans people are being hit by these laws. In some ways I'd argue, trans people with the capacity to become pregnant have it worse, with how they're impacted by reproductive health legislation.
There's really not many laws whether it be through the way they're written, or the way they're enforced, that impact trans women and transfems more than trans men and transmascs or other enben.
People just *think* transfems have it worse because they scream the loudest, and as we know, the squeakiest wheel gets the grease. But if you've removed the wheel already, there's no way for it to squeak now is there? Let's not confuse a lack of voice for a lack of being impacted.
