Around the Rumor Mill (Lohen x Fem!Reader)
Summary: After Lohen joins the knights, you’re left to do your commissions all alone. If only the other adventurers had the same faith in you as they did your ex-adventuring partner...
Also cross-posted to ao3!
Warnings/Tags: Angst, hurt & comfort, Adventurer!Reader, Shy!Reader, reader has a vision (element not specified), rumors directed towards reader, pre-canon, pre-relationship but Reader & Lohen act so close they might as well be dating, Theodore appears briefly in flashback form
Notes: This is technically a prequel to a Lohen x Witch!Reader series I'm working on, which is why I'm using Fem!Reader here. The idea for this fic was inspired by a prompt from @darkmodeilluga in which someone spreads rumors about the reader and Lohen comforts her!
You’ve done this hundreds of times.
Well, Lohen’s done this hundreds of times, but he’s a knight now, so you have to go pick up your commissions on your own. All you have to do is walk up to the request board, pick the four you wanted, let Katheryne know, then go on your merry way.
It should be simple. Easy.
Not for you though, for a multitude of reasons.
On your very first day as an adventurer, you managed to jumble up your words so badly when introducing yourself to the point where the only things that came out of your mouth were your own name and ‘please’.
You vowed to never step foot anywhere near the Adventurers’ Guild ever again after that, and you’ve managed to keep your word. Until now, that is.
Lohen still hasn’t let you live that down, but seeing how genuinely terrified you looked around the other adventurers, he was kind enough to handle the talking for both of you, though not without some teasing.
Honestly, you don’t really know why you choose to stay as an adventurer. The only reason you joined in the first place was because Lohen needed you as an alibi to hide his daily escapades from his parents, insisting it was much easier to tell them he was going out with you every single day.
Maybe it was because you wanted to hold onto this thing that the two of you once shared, so you could still feel connected to him even as you spent less time together.
Maybe it was because, even with this setback, you’d still get to go most of your day without needing to socialize, unlike most other jobs.
Or, maybe you were secretly a masochist like Lohen, who knows?
Taking a deep breath, you walk over to the request board to see the daily commissions.
Two of them instantly catch your eye. A storm eye needed to be dealt with in Dadaupa Gorge, and a hilichurl camp had to be cleared not far away from it. Those shouldn’t be too difficult, even without Lohen’s help.
Unfortunately, just as you pick them off the board, you see someone you recognized as ‘Reckless Pallad’ walking in your direction.
‘Please don’t talk to me, please don’t talk to me, please don’t talk to me-’
“Hi there! It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” He says, reaching his hand out to you.
It takes just a little too long for your brain to start working again. When it does, you become acutely aware of how awkward you must look.
“Nice to meet you too!” You say a little too loudly, fumbling to shake his hand. This was not a good first impression, but at least it was better than that other time.
He smiles at you before looking around, confused. “Where’s your adventuring partner? Aren’t you two always together?”
“Oh, it’s just me now. He joined the knights recently… but, thanks for asking?” Your fidget with the paper in your hands. “I’ll, uh, be on my way now. It was nice meeting you!”
Before you could swipe two more commissions and go running for the hills, Pallad looks down at the ones already in your hands before speaking again.
“Are you sure you can handle those on your own?” He gives you a questioning look.
His words throw you for a loop. Why was he doubting you?
“...what’s that supposed to mean?” Looking back up at him, you swear his expression bordered on condescension.
Did you do something to warrant that look?
“It’s common for adventurers to be overconfident in themselves right after they leave an adventuring party.” He laughs. “Here, why not take these instead?”
Before you know it, he’s shoving four random commissions into your hands while taking away the two you already had, claiming those should be much easier for you.
You were too stunned to even respond as he guided you off to Katheryne.
Taking a closer look at the commissions you were given only serves to confuse you more.
Who thought babysitting Klee was an easy commission?! Well, at the very least this was going to be an… interesting day.
“It’s a shame she lost such a good partner. Poor girl, I hope she’s going to be alright.”
Those words catch your attention as you pass by the Adventurers’ Guild later that day. Were those adventurers talking about you?
“She can’t be that desperate for mora if she’s still willing to take on those dangerous commissions, can she?”
Your brows furrow. How did they even come to that conclusion? You wanted to take the same commissions you normally did, with Lohen or not.
Was the other adventurers’ opinion of you really that bad?
“Should we invite her to join our team?”
After hearing them say all that? You wouldn’t join them even if you were as desperate for mora as they claimed.
“Are you kidding?! Did you see who she was partnered with? Half the times he’d come back with some of the worst injuries I’ve ever seen! And there’d she be, unscathed right besides him. She must be a coward for that to be the case…”
You clench your fist. It was Lohen who always ran directly into danger armed with just a dagger and his bow. He was happy to do so! You certainly weren’t willing to do the same. It was a lot harder bludgeoning enemies to death with a catalyst than stabbing them with a sharp object.
“No wonder why he left for the knights, I wouldn’t want to be saddled with someone as useless as that either.”
That isn’t true. You know it isn’t. Lohen would never do that to you and you certainly pulled your own weight.
But even so, hearing those opinions about you hurt way more than it should've. It felt like you were taking a hilichurl club straight to the gut, but at least that would’ve been easy to heal.
“I bet she'll last a week on her own, at most. You know it’s bad when Reckless Pallad takes pity on you!”
Your head was starting to hurt from thinking about their words.
Is that why Pallad came up to you earlier? Were you correct in identifying how he looked at you? Did he really think that lowly of you?
Just how long have people been talking about you behind your back? Has it always been like this, or did they just start recently, thinking you were an easy target now that you were without your knight in shining armor?
You always prided yourself on your perception, so how could you have missed this? Were your skills worse than you thought? Have you just been deluding yourself this whole time?
Did their cruel words have merit behind them?
“Well, all it means is better commissions for us. Finally, we don’t have to worry about those two always taking all the good ones!”
With that, you quietly leave, trying not to let your emotions overwhelm you. If you broke down now, it would only serve to prove them right, that you were as weak-willed and useless as they claimed.
Those were just a couple of words. Mere opinions. Hurtful ones, but surely you've survived much worse.
So why did it hurt so badly?
You must be overthinking things. That had to be it.
Of course it'd be normal for people to doubt you when it always looked like Lohen did all the work.
(But you were always by his side, no? If they've seen the injuries he got, surely they've also seen the neat bandages covering them. The bandages you covered him in. You know you’ve come back with a couple of cuts and bruises of your own multiple times as well. Did they not see that?)
Of course no one believes in your abilities. After all, it was you who went out of your way to conceal them, not wanting to draw unnecessary attention to yourself.
(But, maybe you were wrong in your approach? You didn't even think about how it must have been for Lohen, looking like he was associating with someone who’s nothing but deadweight. Your choice certainly feels like a mistake now. Maybe having all those unwanted eyes on you would be easier to bear with than this.)
You didn't say anything about this to Lohen when you met up for dinner later that evening. He's been keeping you updated on how quickly he’s climbing the ranks.
You don’t need to distract him.
This was your first test of strength alone, an opportunity to prove to everyone that you’re just as capable as Lohen is. Surely, even if you never worked up the courage to confront those rumoring adventurers directly, the issue will go away on its own with time.
Until then, you could grin and bear it.
With each passing day, more and more people in the guild were treating you like glass: a liability.
There would always be someone to intercept you when you went to go pick your commissions, handing you nothing but the low-risk ones. More often than not, it was one of the adventurers you overheard gossiping about you.
You’d recognize their voices anywhere.
You swear you could hear their whispers growing stronger around you, infecting everyone with their negative views on you.
Those rumors cut deeper and deeper the more you heard them. Yet, why were you getting so worked up over this anyways? You knew better than anyone that they were baseless, and you could prove it easily, all you had to do was stand your ground.
So why couldn’t you do it?
Why do you always freeze up whenever anyone approaches you?
Why couldn’t you say anything to defend yourself?
All it took was one simple action. So why can’t you do anything?
What would Lohen think if he saw you like this? Would he agree with them?
You didn’t want to think about it. It’ll go away on its own. If it didn’t, well–
“Huh, didn't expect to see you here!”
Lohen’s voice catches you off guard while you’re finishing up a commission at the cathedral later that week.
“Eep-! What are you doing here?!”
It was barely the afternoon, shouldn't he be off training somewhere?!
The smirk on Lohen’s face droops ever so slightly. “One of those incompetent knights shot me with a training round. Honestly, I don't know how someone with that bad trigger discipline even makes it into the 5th.”
“What do you mean you got shot?! Where?!” All your previous worries disappear from your mind as you start looking him over, trying to find the wound.
Lohen has the gall to laugh in your face. “Relax, training rounds can barely break through skin. I would know.”
You stare at him, wide-eyed. “How often do you get shot?”
It hasn’t even been a week since he joined the knights, how is this already a normal occurrence?
“Eh, often enough to know they only leave a bruise. A bit of a nasty one, but still, just a bruise.” Lohen sighs, looking down at his arm. “Adorno isn't convinced though. He sent me here to get checked up.”
“But…” His smirk becomes more devious as his eyes return to you, “Since you're here, you can do it instead!”
Throwing an arm around your shoulders, Lohen quickly drags you off to a secluded corner. Upon stopping, he offers you his right arm and looks at you expectantly. As you roll up his sleeve, you're met with one of the nastiest bruises you've ever seen.
“Half the time he’d come back with some of the worst injuries I’ve ever seen! And there’d she be, unscathed right besides him. She must be a coward for that to be the case…” Your hands still for a moment as the adventurer’s words echo in your mind.
“Say, why were you at the cathedral?” Lohen questions as you start healing him.
Your hands pause again momentarily. “Oh. I had a commission there.”
“Really? Why would you pick that one? You hate how talkative some of the nuns are.”
You look away from him. “I woke up late. Got stuck with some of the bad ones.” It was a horrendous excuse, but at least it was somewhat believable.
Quickly glancing back at Lohen, you see him staring directly at you, his expression unreadable.
You don't like how piercing his gaze feels.
He gives you a tilted look before leaning in extremely close to your face. “You know you’re awful at lying, right?”
The sudden closeness makes you take a step back.
“No I’m not!” Your face turns red as you continue looking off to the side, having been caught red-handed.
Lohen jabs two fingers into the side of your neck. “Your heart rate is up, you’re looking everywhere except at me, and your face is giving it away.”
“Rude.” You pry his hand off by the wrist, though you’re reluctant to let go afterwards. His warmth was more than comforting, making you realize just how much you’ve missed him these past few days.
“You okay?” Lohen shifts that same hand up to cup your cheek, with no resistance from you.
He hasn’t seen you look this distraught in a very long time.
“Yeah, adventuring is just a lot lonelier by myself.” You let out a choked laugh, feeling your eyes water.
If only you had the drive to join the knights like him.
You wouldn’t be in this situation if you did, but instead, you’re stuck here dealing with the storm of emotions raging inside you.
“Anyways, I need to get back to my commissions. The one at the cathedral took a bit too long and I still have two left.” You savor the feeling of his hand against your face before you take a step away. “You should get back to the knights as well, Adorno’s probably worried sick.”
You muster up the brightest smile as you wave him goodbye. “Let’s talk some other time! You need to tell me how it’s like being in the knights.”
The feeling of his piercing gaze on you, even as you run away, sends shivers down your spine.
It felt awful shutting him out, but there was no reason to bother Lohen about something as trivial as this. Surely he had more important matters to attend to than you.
That night, you wake up to the sound of something at your window. Groggily opening your eyes, you look over at the small clock on your nightstand.
There’s only one person you know who’s crazy enough to scale the side of your house at this hour.
You close your eyes and throw your blanket over your head, hoping that a certain someone would get the hint and leave you alone, at least for tonight.
The tapping at your window stops after just a few minutes. You let out a sigh of relief, only to hear the distinct sound of your front door opening moments later.
Sounds like he did not, in fact, get the hint.
“Rise and shine, sleepyhead!” Lohen says cheerfully, nonchalantly entering your room as if he didn’t just break into your house at an ungodly hour.
“You really need to invest in some better locks.” He teases, tearing the covers off you.
“You’re the only person I need to worry about doing this…” You grumble, grabbing your pillow as you flip onto your back, holding it over your face in hopes that maybe, just maybe, he’ll give up and go home.
Lohen was, unfortunately, not a quitter. He proceeds to also rip your pillow away, making you pout and finally open your eyes again, only to be met with an extreme close up of his face. The sudden closeness startles you into a seated position.
“You wouldn’t let your best friend bleed out in your bedroom now, would you?” He says with a smug grin, holding up a medkit he definitely didn’t take from your bathroom cabinet.
Sighing, you take the medkit from his hands before setting it down on your nightstand, trying your hardest to focus in your still half-asleep state.
“You know the drill.” A yawn escapes your mouth along with the words.
By the time you turn back around to face Lohen, he’s already seated on your bed with his cloak and shirt discarded on the floor.
“You should be more careful. Any half decent lockpick could’ve gotten in here just as quickly!" He jokes.
“I gave you a key for a reason.” You deadpan. Turning on the lights, you’re forced to squint as your eyes slowly adjust to the sudden brightness.
Looking at Lohen’s front, you quickly notice something was off.
He didn't have any injuries.
Now that you think about it, his clothes look a little too clean to have just come back from combat. You place a hand on his shoulder to support yourself as you lean over to look at his back, wanting to confirm your suspicions.
As you do, a pair of arms wrap around your waist, squeezing you tightly.
“It's a lot harder for you to run away like this, wouldn't you say?”
“You were acting strange today. What’s wrong?” His voice is gentle. “Anyone I need to get rid of?” The second sentence sounds just a little too serious for your liking.
“First of all, please don’t kill anyone. I imagine it’s very unbecoming for a knight.” You can feel tears building in your eyes again. “Second, it’s fine. Nothing to concern yourself with.”
“Anything that concerns you also concerns me.” His soft tone shatters any of your remaining defenses.
“I-” A sniffle cuts you off as the tears start streaming down your face.
“Don’t think you’re getting rid of me that easily just because we aren’t adventuring partners anymore,” he teases, “Now out with it.”
“How do you deal with them?” You mutter, frantically trying to wipe your tears away with your hands.
“Deal with what?” Lohen pulls you down to sit next to him, keeping an arm around you as he hands you a handkerchief.
“People.” You sob, resting your head on his shoulder while unceremoniously blowing your nose into the cloth.
He muses for a moment before responding, “Normally with a dagger.”
“So am I! A good threat or two is the perfect thing to get what you want out of people.”
You can imagine it now: If Lohen was in your situation, those adventurers would’ve stopped day one. The thought makes you laugh, even as your eyes start to sting.
“That’s not going to stop the rumors. It may make them worse, actually.”
“What rumors?” He questions.
You try to look away, only for Lohen to place a hand on your cheek, forcefully turning your head back towards him.
“What rumors?” He repeats, tone colder this time.
With that, everything comes rushing out. You throw yourself around him with enough force that it causes the two of you to crash down onto your bed, you landing on top of him. Another wave of tears pour out of you, just like the words from your mouth.
You tell him everything: what you’ve overheard from the other adventurers, the tears you’ve been fighting back every night, your pent up emotions from the past week, how much you’ve missed spending time with him, how much more fun it was when you were together, and how much you didn’t want him knowing about any this— not wanting him to think you were weak.
Lohen gently strokes your hair as you let everything out, listening attentively to each and every word. You’ve always struggled with talking to people. He was worried about this exact thing happening after he passed the knightly entrance exams, but you kept insisting that you’d be fine on your own.
“Why can’t I do anything? It’d be so easy, so why can’t I…!” Your voice was growing hoarse from how much you were yelling, with each word coming out less powerful than the last.
“Poison them instead. That’ll get them to shut up.”
“That’s your thing, not mine. They’d know I ran to you for help.” Your voice was nothing more than a whimper now.
Lohen was shocked. You were worried about that?
“Okay. Use one of your fancy spells on them then.” He suggested.
“That’s not much different.” You argued.
“Magic is your thing. Not mine.” Lohen parrots back at you. “Everyone knows you’re the one with the vision. If they’ve paid any attention to you, they’d know that. If they didn’t, then they’ll know now.”
He tightens his hold on you. “Don’t be an easy target. I know my bunny’s got too many tricks up her sleeve to let those idiots get away with it.”
“...Think the silencing spell would work?” You sniffle quietly.
The only times you’ve used it were to prevent someone from complaining about yours and Lohen’s antics, namely Theodore.
A small smile graces your face at the memory.
“Theo! We have a quick question for you.” You slap a hand on the brunette’s shoulder, slyly placing a sigil containing the spell.
“Think we can take down three ruin guards in ten minutes?” Lohen asks, holding up a commission the two of you took detailing exactly that.
Theodore opens his mouth to respond, only for no words to come out.
“So… is that a yes?” You raise a hand up to your mouth, trying to cover your cheshire smile.
Realizing what you’ve done, Theodore quickly changes tactics to crossing his arms ‘no’.
“I think he’s telling us to go eliminate them.” Lohen purposely misinterprets.
“Thanks for the answer Theo!” As you wave him goodbye, Lohen’s already grabbed your arm and started running for the gates of Mondstadt.
You cackle like an evil witch when you see Theodore chasing after the two of you, still trying to tell you it’s a terrible idea in any way he could.
The three of you must’ve looked crazy to the rest of Mondstadt.
“If Theodore didn’t notice, I doubt they would either.” Lohen agrees, seeing your smile brings one to his own face as well.
“And if that doesn’t work,” He reaches into his back pocket, pulling out a little green vial. “You can always borrow this.”
“I think I’d rather commission you to do that instead. I’m already the socially awkward one, I can’t be the crazy one too.” A quiet laugh escapes your lips.
The sound warms his heart. “If anything ever happens to you, let me know. Okay?” What was his strength worth if he couldn’t even aid you with something like this?
“I don’t want to bother you-”
Lohen pushes your head down onto his chest, preventing you from finishing your sentence.
There are so many things Lohen wants to say to you: how he’ll always be by your side no matter what, how you’ve always been his anchor in his pursuit of power–the beacon that keeps him from straying into the dark–and how he needs you as much as you need him.
But for now, he decides hugging you in a crushing embrace would be enough to convey those feelings.
“Think you can stay the night?” You murmur, face still pressed firmly against his chest. This feeling of warmth was comforting, and you didn’t want to let it go just yet, especially not after the shit show that was this week.
“Anything for you, Bunny.”
“...also please put your shirt back on.” Calming down, it occurs to you that Lohen was still very much shirtless in your bed. You can’t tell if the renewed burning in your cheeks was from the remnants of your tears or the wave of embarrassment upon realizing how romantic this looked and felt.
“I thought you liked seeing me like this.” He teases, making no effort to comply with your demand.
You move to throw his shirt in his face and quickly turn off the lights, praying the darkness hides your blushing face.
You wake up the next morning alone, with the Lohen’s cloak draped over you.
Lohen was probably at the knight’s headquarters by now.
Stretching, you notice something on the back of your hand. It was a crude drawing of a bottle of poison with a skull above it. Next to it, you can make out the words ‘Remember: They deserve it.’.
You brush your thumb over the message, smiling at the absurdity of Lohen’s encouragement.
Taking a deep breath, you get up, get ready, and head out to the Adventurers’ Guild, looking down at Lohen’s message every now and again to keep yourself relaxed. Walking up to the request board, you take a quick scan of the commissions before grabbing the most difficult one you can find and place a tiny sigil containing your spell on the back.
“What are we working with today?” As if on cue, one of the adventurers that’s been gossiping about you approaches from behind, peering over your shoulder to see your pick.
“Sure you want this one?” She takes the paper from your hands.
Her disgustingly sweet tone sickens you.
“Oh, you’re right, I’ll just go with these then!” You quickly grab four other commissions. One of them requires you to kill a ruin guard while the other three require you to take out hilichurl camps.
That much combat was going to be intense, even for you, but it was the best way to get your message across: that you were more than capable of handling yourself.
The adventurer opens her mouth as she tries reaching for you, only to bring that same hand back to her throat once she realized she couldn’t talk anymore. Her confusion gives you ample time to escape, as well as dispelling the sigil from the paper as you walk away, making sure no one can trace the cause of her silence back to you.
She looks weary of you the next morning, shocked to see you’re completely unscathed from your commissions the day before.
Seeing her reaction, you press on Lohen’s now faded drawing again, hoping he’d feel your gratitude through the action.
No way anyone’s going to keep doubting you after this.
You need to find a way to repay him later. Maybe you can take him to ruin guard hunting on his next day off?
Further Notes: Highkey idk how this got to over 4k words considering the writer's block was STRONG with this one- The amount of editing was insane (╥﹏╥)
All colorful floral dividers by @/hearts4mychem!
