I Write For Underappreciated Hot Men

That one really hot character from that obscure TV show who makes you go feral but barely has any photos online?? I write for him >:))) I specialize in RPF and only write x reader, so I’d recommend not engaging with my stuff if that isn’t your thing!

[welcometojackass2022]

My Official Masterlist:

I figured it was about time I compiled a list of all of my published fics! This covers all of the boys I write for from Jackass, the CKY videos, and Viva La Bam. The boys are listed in alphabetical order! This will be updated after each fic is published. Any fics I write using one of the boys characters (from Haggard, Minghags, etc) will go under their heading but will also go under a separate heading for whatever movie the character is from.

Currently Taking Commissions

Rules for Requesting

People I Write For

Important Note: ao3 account

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

Jackass/CKY/Viva La Bam Members:

Bam Margera

NSFW Alphabet: Bam Margera

Bam Being Forced to Fuck You As A Punishment [Smut]

Bam’s Kinks-Headcanons and Short Blurbs

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Phone Sex

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Secretly Dating You

He’s My Thing (Sub!Bam Margera x Reader) [Smut]

Perfect Shot (Sub!Bam Margera x GN! Reader) [Smut]

Sex Is Better When You Share (CKY Guys x Reader) [Smut]

Shut Up (Bam Margera x Reader) [Smut]

Sucking Bam Off From Behind—Short Imagine

Untitled Sub Bam Smut Drabble

Up Against The Shower Wall (Sub! Bam Margera x Reader) [Smut]

What’s My Line Again? (Bam Margera x Reader x Brandon Novak) [Smut]

Brandon DiCamillo

NSFW Alphabet: Brandon DiCamillo

A Crash Course in Intercourse (Dico x Virgin! Reader) [Smut]

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Phone Sex

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Secretly Dating You

Jealous Dico x Reader Smut Drabble (Untitled)

Laughter (Dico x Reader Drabble) [Light Smut]

Sex Is Better When You Share (CKY Guys x Reader) [Smut]

Short Dico x Reader Smut Drabble (Untitled)

Sometimes (Dico x Reader Smut Drabble)

Dating Brandon DiCamillo (Dico) Would Include

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Switching Roles During Sex [Short Smut Drabble]

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Try Out New Kinks For You [Short Smut Drabble]

You’re Fucking Disgusting (Brandon DiCamillo x GN! Reader) [Smut]

Brandon Novak

NSFW Alphabet: Brandon Novak

Drool (Sub! Brandon Novak x Reader Smut Drabble) [Dumbification]

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Phone Sex

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Secretly Dating You

How The CKY Boys Would React to Being Called Pet Named in Bed (Smut Drabble)

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Switching Roles During Sex [Short Smut Drabble]

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Try Out New Kinks For You [Short Smut Drabble]

What’s My Line Again? (Bam Margera x Reader x Brandon Novak) [Smut]

Chris Pontius

NSFW Alphabet: Chris Pontius

Dave England

NSFW Alphabet: Dave England

Ehren McGhehey (Danger Ehren)

NSFW Alphabet: Ehren McGhehey/Danger Ehren (Jackass)

Short Sundresses and Melted Ice Cream (Danger Ehren x Reader) [Fluff]

Jess Margera

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Try Out New Kinks For You [Short Smut Drabble]

Being Bam’s Best Friend Who Has A Crush on Jess Would Include:

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Phone Sex

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Secretly Dating You

Joe Frantz

NSFW Alphabet: Joe Frantz

Fairy Wings (Joe Frantz x Reader Smut Drabble)

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Phone Sex

How the CKY Boys Would React to Being Called Pet Names (Smut Drabble)

Joe Frantz Smut Drabble-Body Worship

Put Me In A Movie (Joe Frantz x Reader) [Smut]

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Switching Roles During Sex [Short Smut Drabble]

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Try Out New Kinks For You [Short Smut Drabble]

The Viagra Story (Joe Frantz x Reader) [Smut]

Johnny Knoxville

NSFW Alphabet: Johnny Knoxville

Be My Baby (Johnny Knoxville x Plus Sized! Reader) [Fluff]

Calls Don't Count (Cheating! Johnny Knoxville x Reader) [Smut]

Don’t Be A Tease (Johnny Knoxville x Reader) [Smut]

Get A Life! (Johnny Knoxville x Bam Margera’s Sister! Reader) [Smut]

Hello, Nurse (Johnny Knoxville x Reader) [Smut]

This Has Got To Stop (Married!Cheater!Johnny Knoxville x Reader) [Smut]

Underwater Exploration (Dom! Johnny Knoxville x Reader) [Smut]

Lord Bottaro

NSFW Alphabet: Lord Bottaro

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Try Out New Kinks For You [Short Smut Drabble]

Raab Himself

NSFW Alphabet: Chris Raab/Raab Himself

Dating Raab Himself Would Include

Hot And Ready, Just Like Our Pizza (Chris Raab/Raab Himself x Reader) [Smut]

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Phone Sex

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Secretly Dating You

How The CKY Boys Would React to Being Called Pet Names in Bed (Smut Drabble)

I Object! (Raab Himself x Secret Girlfriend! Reader) [Smut]

Sex Is Better When You Share (CKY Guys x Reader) [Smut]

Suck It And See (Sub!Chris Raab/Raab Himself x Reader) [Smut]

The Anniversary Surprise (Sub! Raab x Reader) [Smut]

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Switching Roles During Sex [Short Smut Drabble]

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Try Out New Kinks For You [Short Smut Drabble]

Rake Yohn

NSFW Alphabet: Rake Yohn

He Blinded Me With Science (Mad Scientist!Rake Yohn x Reader) [Smut Drabble]

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Phone Sex

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Secretly Dating You

How the CKY Boys Would React to Being Called Pet Names in Bed (Smut Drabble)

Old Man (Rake Yohn x Reader Smut Drabble)

Quiet Time (Dom!Rake Yohn x Reader) [Smut]

Sex Is Better When You Share (CKY Guys x Reader) [Smut]

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Switching Roles During Sex [Short Smut Drabble]

The CKY/Viva La Bam Boys Try Out New Kinks For You [Short Smut Drabble]

Ryan Dunn

NSFW Alphabet: Ryan Dunn

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Phone Sex

How Each CKY Guy Would Handle Secretly Dating You

Sex Is Better When You Share (CKY Guys x Reader) [Smut]

Shove It (Ryan Dunn x Sub!Reader) [Smut]

Stay On Task (Dom!Ryan Dunn x Reader) [Smut

Non-Pairing Fics/Female Jackass Member Fics:

Being A Female Jackass Member Who’s Childhood Best Friends With Bam and Ryan Would Include:

My Jackass Girl Idea

What A Female Jackass Member Would Be Like (Except She’s As Mean and Gross As the Rest of the Guys)

Related to But Not From Jackass and Viva La Bam:

Jimmy Pop

NSFW Alphabet: Jimmy Pop

When I Go Down On You (Jimmy Pop x Reader) [Smut Drabble]

[welcometojackass2022]

I find it SO sweet how casually affectionate Ehren is with people. He's constantly holding the guys' hands, putting his hands on their shoulders to comfort him, going in for hugs, grabbing them for support. Even the newer cast members he was less familiar with. It's just adorable man he's such a sweetie

[welcometojackass2022]

I love all your raab and dico fics im frothing out the mouth for more

hehehe I loveeee writing for Raab and I need to write for Dico as much as I used to :) glad you enjoy them! If you send ideas in I’ll try to get to them as I go along

[welcometojackass2022]

Helloo!!! So ya know the girl that requested the Rake fic with the plus size girl ? Could we also do one for Ryan ? Bc I resonated so hard with that....... Plus you're the only person I trust to write fics for the boys

🥹🥹🥹 so glad yall put your trust in me for these awesome ideas! Can def do something with Ryan and a plus sized reader

I’m considering doing a “would include” for the CKY guys (Ryan and bam included) for dating a plus sized girl tbh but it would be realistic cuz we know how some of them are…🥲

[eextremenoiseterror]

if the jackass guys were ever in a yellowjackets esque scenario i think they’d eat ehren before they even ran out of rations tbh

[welcometojackass2022]

THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY

[welcometojackass2022]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE write something Rake related, it's been a while and I miss dada. I'm not good at making requests and this is the first request I've ever made, but I'm here to support you queen!

I was thinking that maybe you could do something related to Rake having a plus size girlfriend and getting a lot of shit for it (it was the 2000's so extremely thin girls was the norm) and reader getting very insecure, Rake feeling it and trying to comfort her which ends up in very loving love making and a very sweet aftermath.

I don't know what else to say, I love how you write and you're my fave page in all of Tumblr. <3

Okay this is official the SWEETEST ask I’ve ever gotten 🥹🥹 I’m so glad you like my stuff and my page and my writing style omg and I’m so glad you chose to request this, it’s a WONDERFUL idea!!! I’m a plus sized girlie myself and I daydream about this scenario all the time with all the guys so I will absolutely add this to the drafts now!!! <33333

[welcometojackass2022]

Dating Danger Ehren (Ehren McGhehey) Would Include:

(More content for my baby! This one's got a couple of NSFW bullet points, and those are indicated with 3 asterisks as usual. Enjoy!)

Tag List: @eyesofaliar

For starters, I'd say Ehren's the Jackass guy you're most likely to meet in a cute romcom-y way. I can see him accidentally bumping into you at a park and offering to buy you a coffee to apologize, or maybe making eye contact with you from across a store and being so flustered by you and nervously coming over to start up a conversation where he can (hopefully) ask you for a date. He's very sweet and sincere in a way that's incredibly endearing, and I don't think he'd have any issues charming you by just being himself!

Adorable, traditional dates! Ehren would bring you flowers, pay for everything and open all the doors for you on your first date, and you'd assume he was just doing it because it's the first one — but then he'd do it again on the second date, and the third, and the fourth, and after the fifth or sixth time you'd realize that's just what Ehren does when he takes you on any date. I think he'd really like getting to take you out in romantic, classic ways; nice restaurants with rooftop seating and fancy wine, a sweet picnic in the park with sandwiches he made himself, or maybe a horror movie at a theater so you'll hold onto his arm and bury your face in his chest when you get scared.

Ehren moving very quickly in terms of introducing you to the Jackass guys. I think he'd be super eager to have them meet the person he cares so much for, and I also think part of him would be excited to show them that someone as amazing as you loves him and doesn't find him annoying or want to hurt him like the Jackass guys do. He'd have brought you up countless times before introducing you anyway, so the guys would already know a lot about you and would be sure to joke around about how it was nice to put a face to the name Ehren wouldn't shut up about. I think the guys would like you, but would still give you shit and act confused about why you're with him. If you got really upset, they'd probably just double down, but I think if you just gave them shit back and were confident in yourself and in your love for Ehren, they would respect it and eventually back off a bit.

Ehren getting jealous easily, and everyone knowing about it. He's not the type to get angry or take it out on you or anything, but he gets very anxious and visibly annoyed with whoever's flirting on you and causing his jealousy, especially when it's one of the Jackass guys. Some of them find it hilarious to "jokingly" put an arm around you and compliment you in an overly flirty way, or to tell Ehren that he's got competition and needs to watch out, all because they know it'll get him silently fuming. Whoever or whatever is making Ehren jealous, he really just needs you to reassure him and give him a nice big kiss so he knows you have no interest in anyone except him.

Ehren getting a lot more confrontational and angry with the guys whenever you're involved because of how protective he feels toward you. The guys tend to degrade and injure Ehren a lot, both during filming and just on set in general, and I think he'd be terrified of them unintentionally harming you in the process of trying to do something to him (e.g. you getting hit by a projectile that was supposed to hit Ehren because you were standing right next to him). None of the guys want to hurt you, of course, and they'd feel awful about it, but still. Ehren will yell at them, shove them, and even threaten them if they do something stupid like set off an explosion too close to you, and he's so serious about it that it genuinely scares them a little.

Lots of kissing :))) Ehren's very fond of cute little pecks on the lips, and I think if you were on set with him he'd want you to give a kiss before every stunt he does (and he'd grin at the nearest camera afterward every single time). "Can I have a little kiss?" is Ehren's favorite question of all time, and you hear it at least ten times a day, if not twenty. When he's sick, he'll switch to forehead kisses and nose kisses, and he swears they genuinely make him feel better! Ehren also wears a lot of cool belts, and I think he'd love it if you hooked your fingers into his belt loops to pull him in to kiss you.

Tons of cute red carpet photos of you and Ehren at Jackass-related premieres! Ehren absolutely loves showing you off, and we've all seen the iconic photos he's had taken of himself (dude's got a sick ass pose game), so we know the photos you and him would get together at these events would be legendary. Every photo would either be you slaying and him looking goofy, you slaying and him staring at you in awe, or both of you looking goofy together, and they're all getting posted to Twitter in the future with "me and who?" captions.

*** Ehren going down on you constantly. Seriously, he loves to please you and is a total giver, so it's his go-to move and you literally never have to beg (or even just ask twice) for it. He won't do it anywhere super gross or public, but I could definitely see him taking you into a private bathroom at a relatively nice house during a wrap party and going to town on you while he's adoringly looking up at you the whole time and stroking your inner thighs with his fingers. He always rests his head on your leg and asks you how he did afterward, too!

Ehren falling asleep a lot while he's with you, especially with his head in your lap while you're playing with his hair. He's developed some PTSD over the years from the guys constantly fucking with him (everyone knows it's never safe to fall asleep around the Jackass guys), and you're the only person he feels completely safe being vulnerable with and going to sleep near because he knows you won't let anyone or anything hurt him. If you're both laying in bed, he'll fall asleep almost immediately if you let him be the little spoon :)

Ehren trying to act tough and totally pain-resistant around you because he wants you to see him as brave. The guys make fun of him a lot for being a wimp, but he goes through some of the toughest stunts out of any of them, and I think he'd want you to focus on that and not how hurt he got from said stunt. He'd try to avoid making loud sounds or noticeable faces if you were there and could see him, even if he was in an insane amount of pain. He'd still love it if you took care of him and soothed him and made him feel better, but he'd want you to do it in a way that makes him feel all brave and tough. Tell him he's your "big strong man" and he'll be giddy over it for weeks.

Ehren being on your ass about safety, especially in the early days when "Safety first!" was his catchphrase. That man is not letting you leave the house on a bike or scooter without a helmet, and if you take him roller-skating, you're both wearing knee and elbow pads whether you like it or not. He's sustained a lot of injuries from being in Jackass, and all he wants is to be able to protect you from getting hurt as often as he can so you don't have to be in pain like he has.

*** Ehren being obsessed with skin-to-skin contact with you, however he can get it, whether it's through missionary sex, the two of you being up against each other in a shower, or even just you and him cuddling naked in bed while watching a movie together. He just physically can't get enough of feeling your body right up against his!

Massages! Not even necessarily sexual ones; Ehren just likes giving you massages as a way of making you feel loved, and he especially loves getting them himself when he's all sore from a stunt. I think for him, physical contact is a major way to express love and intimacy, so something sweet like a back rub or a neck massage would mean a lot to him, especially if you use a lotion or oil that smells really good.

Being one of the few people Ehren is as comfortable being quiet with as he is being chatty and talkative. Ehren usually has a lot to say and feels like he needs to fill the silence most of the time by talking about whatever comes to mind, but with you he feels comfortable enough to just sit quietly and let his brain relax for a bit.

Conversely, you and Ehren having plenty of moments where you both just sit there and talk for hours about absolutely anything and everything (or absolutely nothing). You're one of the few people he doesn't feel judged or annoying around, so he's usually pretty eager to get to share his thoughts with you and hear yours in return. Sometimes he even gets so engrossed in talking to you that he forgets about stuff he had planned for later; this has led to him completely forgetting to arrive to specific stunts on time, which of course has gotten him in trouble with the guys before. He always says it's worth it though, and he means it!

A lot of hand-holding. Ehren's the type to reach out and hold his friends' hands when they're going through something stressful or just need support, and he'd be like that with you tenfold. He'll hold your hand anywhere, at any time, without needing a reason, and won't let go first even if he's got a bad itch and his other hand is preoccupied. He does the thumb rub thing for sure and will melt if you do it for him, and he also definitely gives your hand a light squeeze to get your attention or to express the cuteness aggression you make him feel >:) He also kisses the back of your hand a lot!

Needing to comfort Ehren and assure him you don't view him as any less handsome when the guys fuck with his appearance. That chipped tooth? Tell him it's adorable and compliment his smile every now and then so he feels better about it. The horrible shave job he got on that day he kept getting surprised with the shaver? Kiss him on the shaved spots and assure him it's fine if he chooses to leave it like that or chooses to just shave it all off for the time being. His self-esteem isn't the greatest after all the shit he's been through, but knowing you still think he's handsome would be what matters to him.

Ehren being so unbelievably sweet and attentive and gentle literally all the time to you, no matter how stressed he is or what's going on around him. He's already been said to be super kind and caring, and that would especially be the case for you given that you're the love of his life. He's constantly asking if you need him to get you some water or a blanket or a snack, offering to do nice things for you so you don't have to worry about them, and complimenting all the time about how beautiful and smart and funny and interesting you are.

*** Lots of hand-holding and kissing during sex. Ehren's an absolute sucker for interlocking fingers with you and kissing you and having his body right up against yours while you're making love because it just feels so close and intimate and warm and safe. I don't think he could handle doing positions where he can't see your face and be right up against you and give you active affection during it, so stuff like doggystyle and reverse cowgirl might just be out for him.

Ehren getting super flustered and happy when you wear his shirts and hoodies out in public or wear his boxers when you sleep over at his house, and being equally excited to wear stuff that has your name or face on it or that you bought for him. He's the type to walk around and show off his shirt with your face on it so all the guys can see it, or to make sure to tell everyone around him that you bought him the nice new pants he's been wearing and that he loves them.

Small thing, but Ehren keeping every single card and present you ever give him for his birthday and for holidays — envelopes and gift bags included. He treasures them like nothing else and would rather throw out something of his own than the things you've given him.

[welcometojackass2022]

Dating Danger Ehren (Ehren McGhehey) Would Include:

(More content for my baby! This one's got a couple of NSFW bullet points, and those are indicated with 3 asterisks as usual. Enjoy!)

Tag List: @eyesofaliar

For starters, I'd say Ehren's the Jackass guy you're most likely to meet in a cute romcom-y way. I can see him accidentally bumping into you at a park and offering to buy you a coffee to apologize, or maybe making eye contact with you from across a store and being so flustered by you and nervously coming over to start up a conversation where he can (hopefully) ask you for a date. He's very sweet and sincere in a way that's incredibly endearing, and I don't think he'd have any issues charming you by just being himself!

Adorable, traditional dates! Ehren would bring you flowers, pay for everything and open all the doors for you on your first date, and you'd assume he was just doing it because it's the first one — but then he'd do it again on the second date, and the third, and the fourth, and after the fifth or sixth time you'd realize that's just what Ehren does when he takes you on any date. I think he'd really like getting to take you out in romantic, classic ways; nice restaurants with rooftop seating and fancy wine, a sweet picnic in the park with sandwiches he made himself, or maybe a horror movie at a theater so you'll hold onto his arm and bury your face in his chest when you get scared.

Ehren moving very quickly in terms of introducing you to the Jackass guys. I think he'd be super eager to have them meet the person he cares so much for, and I also think part of him would be excited to show them that someone as amazing as you loves him and doesn't find him annoying or want to hurt him like the Jackass guys do. He'd have brought you up countless times before introducing you anyway, so the guys would already know a lot about you and would be sure to joke around about how it was nice to put a face to the name Ehren wouldn't shut up about. I think the guys would like you, but would still give you shit and act confused about why you're with him. If you got really upset, they'd probably just double down, but I think if you just gave them shit back and were confident in yourself and in your love for Ehren, they would respect it and eventually back off a bit.

Ehren getting jealous easily, and everyone knowing about it. He's not the type to get angry or take it out on you or anything, but he gets very anxious and visibly annoyed with whoever's flirting on you and causing his jealousy, especially when it's one of the Jackass guys. Some of them find it hilarious to "jokingly" put an arm around you and compliment you in an overly flirty way, or to tell Ehren that he's got competition and needs to watch out, all because they know it'll get him silently fuming. Whoever or whatever is making Ehren jealous, he really just needs you to reassure him and give him a nice big kiss so he knows you have no interest in anyone except him.

Ehren getting a lot more confrontational and angry with the guys whenever you're involved because of how protective he feels toward you. The guys tend to degrade and injure Ehren a lot, both during filming and just on set in general, and I think he'd be terrified of them unintentionally harming you in the process of trying to do something to him (e.g. you getting hit by a projectile that was supposed to hit Ehren because you were standing right next to him). None of the guys want to hurt you, of course, and they'd feel awful about it, but still. Ehren will yell at them, shove them, and even threaten them if they do something stupid like set off an explosion too close to you, and he's so serious about it that it genuinely scares them a little.

Lots of kissing :))) Ehren's very fond of cute little pecks on the lips, and I think if you were on set with him he'd want you to give a kiss before every stunt he does (and he'd grin at the nearest camera afterward every single time). "Can I have a little kiss?" is Ehren's favorite question of all time, and you hear it at least ten times a day, if not twenty. When he's sick, he'll switch to forehead kisses and nose kisses, and he swears they genuinely make him feel better! Ehren also wears a lot of cool belts, and I think he'd love it if you hooked your fingers into his belt loops to pull him in to kiss you.

Tons of cute red carpet photos of you and Ehren at Jackass-related premieres! Ehren absolutely loves showing you off, and we've all seen the iconic photos he's had taken of himself (dude's got a sick ass pose game), so we know the photos you and him would get together at these events would be legendary. Every photo would either be you slaying and him looking goofy, you slaying and him staring at you in awe, or both of you looking goofy together, and they're all getting posted to Twitter in the future with "me and who?" captions.

*** Ehren going down on you constantly. Seriously, he loves to please you and is a total giver, so it's his go-to move and you literally never have to beg (or even just ask twice) for it. He won't do it anywhere super gross or public, but I could definitely see him taking you into a private bathroom at a relatively nice house during a wrap party and going to town on you while he's adoringly looking up at you the whole time and stroking your inner thighs with his fingers. He always rests his head on your leg and asks you how he did afterward, too!

Ehren falling asleep a lot while he's with you, especially with his head in your lap while you're playing with his hair. He's developed some PTSD over the years from the guys constantly fucking with him (everyone knows it's never safe to fall asleep around the Jackass guys), and you're the only person he feels completely safe being vulnerable with and going to sleep near because he knows you won't let anyone or anything hurt him. If you're both laying in bed, he'll fall asleep almost immediately if you let him be the little spoon :)

Ehren trying to act tough and totally pain-resistant around you because he wants you to see him as brave. The guys make fun of him a lot for being a wimp, but he goes through some of the toughest stunts out of any of them, and I think he'd want you to focus on that and not how hurt he got from said stunt. He'd try to avoid making loud sounds or noticeable faces if you were there and could see him, even if he was in an insane amount of pain. He'd still love it if you took care of him and soothed him and made him feel better, but he'd want you to do it in a way that makes him feel all brave and tough. Tell him he's your "big strong man" and he'll be giddy over it for weeks.

Ehren being on your ass about safety, especially in the early days when "Safety first!" was his catchphrase. That man is not letting you leave the house on a bike or scooter without a helmet, and if you take him roller-skating, you're both wearing knee and elbow pads whether you like it or not. He's sustained a lot of injuries from being in Jackass, and all he wants is to be able to protect you from getting hurt as often as he can so you don't have to be in pain like he has.

*** Ehren being obsessed with skin-to-skin contact with you, however he can get it, whether it's through missionary sex, the two of you being up against each other in a shower, or even just you and him cuddling naked in bed while watching a movie together. He just physically can't get enough of feeling your body right up against his!

Massages! Not even necessarily sexual ones; Ehren just likes giving you massages as a way of making you feel loved, and he especially loves getting them himself when he's all sore from a stunt. I think for him, physical contact is a major way to express love and intimacy, so something sweet like a back rub or a neck massage would mean a lot to him, especially if you use a lotion or oil that smells really good.

Being one of the few people Ehren is as comfortable being quiet with as he is being chatty and talkative. Ehren usually has a lot to say and feels like he needs to fill the silence most of the time by talking about whatever comes to mind, but with you he feels comfortable enough to just sit quietly and let his brain relax for a bit.

Conversely, you and Ehren having plenty of moments where you both just sit there and talk for hours about absolutely anything and everything (or absolutely nothing). You're one of the few people he doesn't feel judged or annoying around, so he's usually pretty eager to get to share his thoughts with you and hear yours in return. Sometimes he even gets so engrossed in talking to you that he forgets about stuff he had planned for later; this has led to him completely forgetting to arrive to specific stunts on time, which of course has gotten him in trouble with the guys before. He always says it's worth it though, and he means it!

A lot of hand-holding. Ehren's the type to reach out and hold his friends' hands when they're going through something stressful or just need support, and he'd be like that with you tenfold. He'll hold your hand anywhere, at any time, without needing a reason, and won't let go first even if he's got a bad itch and his other hand is preoccupied. He does the thumb rub thing for sure and will melt if you do it for him, and he also definitely gives your hand a light squeeze to get your attention or to express the cuteness aggression you make him feel >:) He also kisses the back of your hand a lot!

Needing to comfort Ehren and assure him you don't view him as any less handsome when the guys fuck with his appearance. That chipped tooth? Tell him it's adorable and compliment his smile every now and then so he feels better about it. The horrible shave job he got on that day he kept getting surprised with the shaver? Kiss him on the shaved spots and assure him it's fine if he chooses to leave it like that or chooses to just shave it all off for the time being. His self-esteem isn't the greatest after all the shit he's been through, but knowing you still think he's handsome would be what matters to him.

Ehren being so unbelievably sweet and attentive and gentle literally all the time to you, no matter how stressed he is or what's going on around him. He's already been said to be super kind and caring, and that would especially be the case for you given that you're the love of his life. He's constantly asking if you need him to get you some water or a blanket or a snack, offering to do nice things for you so you don't have to worry about them, and complimenting all the time about how beautiful and smart and funny and interesting you are.

*** Lots of hand-holding and kissing during sex. Ehren's an absolute sucker for interlocking fingers with you and kissing you and having his body right up against yours while you're making love because it just feels so close and intimate and warm and safe. I don't think he could handle doing positions where he can't see your face and be right up against you and give you active affection during it, so stuff like doggystyle and reverse cowgirl might just be out for him.

Ehren getting super flustered and happy when you wear his shirts and hoodies out in public or wear his boxers when you sleep over at his house, and being equally excited to wear stuff that has your name or face on it or that you bought for him. He's the type to walk around and show off his shirt with your face on it so all the guys can see it, or to make sure to tell everyone around him that you bought him the nice new pants he's been wearing and that he loves them.

Small thing, but Ehren keeping every single card and present you ever give him for his birthday and for holidays — envelopes and gift bags included. He treasures them like nothing else and would rather throw out something of his own than the things you've given him.

[welcometojackass2022]

Rewatched Jackass Forever. The bear stunt makes me want to kill everyone except Ehren dude he looked TRAUMATIZED my poor baby :(

[welcometojackass2022]

Can’t watch Jackass or Viva La Bam or CKY with anyone cuz the second one of my favs looks good on screen I’m crawling on all fours growling like a caveman losing my shit

[welcometojackass2022]

Bam is puppy in a pathetic “wear a collar and beg for treats” kinda way

Ehren is puppy in a “omg what a good boy!!! let me pet you” kinda way

[welcometojackass2022]

addition: Raab is puppy in an “overexcited all the time tail wagging like crazy might pee on the floor” kinda way

[welcometojackass2022]

Bam is puppy in a pathetic “wear a collar and beg for treats” kinda way

Ehren is puppy in a “omg what a good boy!!! let me pet you” kinda way

[welcometojackass2022]

Bro I LOVE the new Ehren fic it's genuinely so perfect I almost cried because there's no part II

AHHH THANK YOU i was so happy to get to write for my baby :) I will make a part 2 soon don't fret! I'm working on a "Dating Danger Ehren Would Include" as we speak!

[welcometojackass2022]

hi i was fem bam anon - not too many specifics but

- bam gets called a "good girl" as a joke and gets hard about it

- hes REALLY embarrassed about it

- please but him in a dress and a bra

oh yeah

You're SOOOO genius-coded holy shit these are golden. Bam in a bra....dream come true

[boundtogetloud]

little fruit

[welcometojackass2022]

He loves playing it off like he’s joking…Bam you know this is who you are

[welcometojackass2022]

hi i come to humbly request forcefem sub bam smut please

Anon I’m shaking right now you are A MASTERMIND how did I not write this before??? It’s going in the drafts rn any specifics you want? Omg this is gonna be so fun Bam you are gonna ROCK that little black dress

[apr3sentsometh1ng]

“God damn they’re just in love with each other”

“Totally”