whimsy rain writer

writer | reader

[whimsyrainwriter]

salutations my friend~

Hello there and welcome to my blog!!

I’m a teen author and most things I post here are my original thoughts and poems about my life!

Aside from being a writer, I also happen to be a bookworm and am a sucker for romance so let me know if you have any recs!

If you have any questions, feel free to dm me :)

Happy writing!

[whimsyrainwriter]

You know,

I tried.

I tried to tell you

About what keeps me up at night.

I tried to tell you

About my pain.

I tried to tell you

That I haven’t felt much of anything in months.

That everything has started to feel the same.

That the only coherent thought I have these days

Is the constant wish of death.

Maybe then

As I lie in a pool of my own blood

Will I finally be at peace.

Because no matter what I tried to tell you

You told me I was dramatic.

You told me I was faking.

How can I fake my pain?

How can I fake the darkness that pulls at me everyday?

How can I fake the words I’ve carved into my skin from your cruel comments?

But I should know.

Help is not something I deserve.

Help is not something I am ever going to get.

Because in your eyes

I am just a nuisance.

A means to end.

I should be thankful though.

Because after all of these months of numbness

You finally made me feel something.

You made me feel helpless.

You made me feel hopeless.

You reminded me

Of why I am suicidal in the first place.

[whimsyrainwriter]

I don’t regret what we had.

I never have and I never will.

But sometimes,

I regret saying hello to you that day.

[kissedfawns]

they hate me for my girlish whimsy

[byoldervine]

It honestly surprised me how little discipline it felt like it took me to write once I figured out what worked for me

One or two hours a week, which I could knock out all at once. Just 1000 words. And I was generally excited to go back to it every week

But 1000 words every week is a total of 52,000 words per year. That’s a book. You can write a whole ass book on just 1000 words per week. Just one or two hours per week, and you can be done by the end of the year

Isn’t that insane? How simple it is? Far from easy, sure, but so simple. Less than 150 words per day. Less than 20 minutes per day. You can distribute it across the week however you like, and you’re set. From a general standpoint, that’s all it takes

And by god that kept me motivated to keep coming back

[whimsyrainwriter]

all the sudden im reminded to write a chapter :)

[whimsyrainwriter]

am i sad and depressed: yes

but~

IT DONT MATTER BC SPIDER-MAN BRAND NEW DAY COMES OUT THIS MONTH!!!!

ur reminder to not let ur mental shit control ur life and still get hyped for stupid things :)

there is ALWAYS something/someone to live for—and if their isn’t, then live for urself

love u guys always :)

[uwudonoodle]

[suchaflirtt]

I need some pizzaaaa

[whimsyrainwriter]

listen, it’s not my fault i like food :)

[whimsyrainwriter]

I’ve learned to listen when you yell.

I’ve learned to pick up what you really think about me.

I’ve learned to understand that the apologies after aren’t true.

Because hidden in your cruel words are your honest thoughts.

The things you keep inside suddenly pour out when I mess up.

So more than me,

You are a liar.

You are a liar for pretending you love me.

You are a liar for pretending you care.

I’ve learned that I am utterly alone in this world.

I once thought you were my number one supporter.

Maybe you lied about that too.

So you want to hear the truth?

You’ve ruined me.

And still I could never hate you.

You told me you wish I was dead.

And now I know that you weren’t lying then

Because I wish the same too.

You said I was a waste of your time.

A waste of your money.

When minutes before you were bragging of my future success.

Am I not worth being loved behind closed doors?

In the end it will still end up being me who apologizes.

It will be me who remembers these words.

It will be me who pays the price.

It will always be me.

So this is me saying that you win.

Because I’m done trying.

I’m just fucking done.

[tofutomato]

you gotta read, you gotta write, you gotta draw, you gotta watch films and shows. there is literally NO time to be employed

[whimsyrainwriter]

“I hope you have a daughter just like you”

My mother shouts like my existence is a form of punishment.

She says it like it wasn’t her who wanted me.

She says it like it’s my fault for being born.

“You’re just like your father”

My mother screams like it was me who married the man who ruined my life.

She says it like it doesn’t kill me inside.

She says it like it’s true.

“I wish I never had you”

My mother finally whispers.

She says it and for once it’s a sentiment I can agree with.

She says it and I ache to ask why she had me in the first place.

Because to have a daughter like myself is to have a child filled with pain,

Grief,

Hatred.

And if I really am just like my father I’m better off ending that legacy here.

Because he’s the reason my heart is filled with pain.

Pain from the man who left me when I needed him the most.

Grief for the man who was supposed to be my father.

And hatred for the man who made me be who I am today.

So say you wish you never had me.

And one day your wish might just come true.

[perfectquote]

“We need fantasy to survive because reality is too difficult.”

— Lady Gaga

[whimsyrainwriter]

I loved you.

I loved you enough to write about you.

I loved you enough to tell my friends.

I loved you enough to survive.

I told myself everyday you were worth being alive for.

It was you I looked too when life was too hard.

It was you who held my heart.

It was you I wished for every 11:11.

It was you who I loved enough to survive.

But you love someone else.

When your name was the only one on my mind, yours was full of hers.

When I told you I loved you, you told me you loved her.

But I should know,

I’m not worthy of your love,

Of any love.

I loved you enough to survive.

But without you here, I simply want to die.

[whimsyrainwriter]

I’m tired of being “okay”.

I’m tired of pretending we’re all fine.

I’m tired of being alone.

So I open my phone.

I open your contact.

And I write.

If we are left to deal with all of this,

Why not deal with it together?

This world has brought

Me to you

And you to me.

If you’re destined to crash,

We’ll do that together too.

It’s not fair.

It’s not right.

But it’s all we have.

And if all we have is each other,

Then let’s stay together through it all.

[sycamore-daydreams]

Bumpy path

Rainy sky

Static radio

Low on gas

I’ll drive for an hour

Then take a turn in the passenger seat

Because sometimes I am weak

And you make that okay.

Someday

There’ll be sun

Until then

I can’t think of a better person to be on this road with.

[whimsyrainwriter]

Silence.

Quite.

Darkness.

I’m afraid of what they hold.

I’m afraid of what will happen when I’m at the mercy of my mind.

Because the silence is so loud.

It’s screaming.

My head hurts.

My heart hurts.

The empty shell that holds my name is a cracked vase.

The quiet is so loud.

It’s screeching.

My body aches.

My mind aches.

I want to be free of voice that reminds me every day of my insignificance.

If we live to die anyways,

Why wait?

Why go through all this pain if the end result is the same?

It’s for the journey

They say

It’s for the experience.

But all I’ve learned is to hide my fears,

To hide my flaws.

And present a perfect version of myself to the world.

And somewhere along the way

My will to continue has slowly died.

With it went my spirit

And soon my life.

I lay in the darkness of my silent room and watch as the minutes bleed into hours.

Into days.

Into years.

It all feels the same.

[whimsyrainwriter]

I think I fell in love with you.

Somewhere along the line,

Somewhere along the way,

I think my heart started to change.

I've never felt this way.

Because if this is what it feels like to fall,

I don't want anyone to catch me.

If this is what it feels like to drown,

I don't want anyone to save me.

If this is what it feels like to burn,

Then I'd happily go up in flames if only you would stay by my side.

You could stab me in the chest and I'd simply thank you for the touch.

I'd beg for you not to break my heart,

But it's yours anyway.

So keep my love.

My heart.

My soul.

While I just pray you feel the same.

Sometime.

Someday.

I've already promised you forever so,

Fall in love with me.

Like I did you.

So we can become a we.

Not just a me and you.

[ladyignatius4]

The cruelest joke is when the scene you've daydreamed about for six months becomes the most gruelling to actually write.