Terry's Poems

minor screaming into the void a space for me to share my ramblings and assorted things i find and like, most things written by me

[wisterical13]

fuck bro i think ive been treating the person i love most in the whole world kinda badly, what if im making her feel stupid, shes kinda oblivious alot of the time so i kinda teasingly like wait for her to get things or i will act like its obvious (it is to me) but genuinely what of she feels stupid, and what if i did that, she's not stupid or dumb shes perfect (and a little dense) but also i cant like tell her this bc we tell eachother things but not like abt eachother and idk how to act around her fuck idk what to dooo

[wisterical13]

NOT AGAIN TS PMO, HOW TF DO I STOP DOING THIS

[wisterical13]

everyone is always talking about the purpose of life, 'what is the point?'

does there have to be one? can't i just look at the sunsets, and go on walks, and enjoy the feeling of hands in my hair, and read, and go to school, and feel lonely, and love my friends without it being 'what i was made for'

i don't think there is a purpose to life, and i think that's okay

[wisterical13]

how deal with feelings how make stop how deal with more love than i have ever had for anyone ever how cope

[wisterical13]

me when im horrifically sick AND my wife is offline, help im going through withdrawals. I NEEDDD HIMMMMM. I feel bad and he helps me not feel bad, i can't see him because I can't go to school and he is at a friends house so he isn't online on discord

i miss him so much :(

the last few days have been SO good too

[wisterical13]

i am so tired

[wisterical13]

tfw your aro/ace and you're looking for people to relate to and then boom you have a bunch of ace friends (two of them end up liking you, you date one of them) and you realise i do relate to atleast one of you in certain ways and thats rlly cool but being ace doesn't bother me in the same way that being aro does. so now your looking for aro friends and boom! you have two aro/ace friends but they both actually rlly like being aro/ace and they have had alot more time to adjust to it so now your just like, wtf am i supposed to do now, also am i tweaking or are some of my friends maybe aro/ace (i may be searching for things to relate to but girl i dont think thats normal) 😀😀😀

[wisterical13]

currently im in a friendship where we both have feelings for eachother, we are completely open abt liking eachother but neither of us really want to date. he is ace, i am aro/ace. he has never been in a relationship and im a little scarred from my past relationship (my fault, thats the problem) he is straight but im non binary. this is hell and it is cozy and warm. i want to spend the rest of my life with him, i might want to date him idk (feelings are very very confusing) he won't be fully open with me, i love him more than almost anything. please make it stop, I don't want it to stop

[wisterical13]

how tf am i supposed to balance my hatred for people (the voices😔) with my love for her😭

THIS IS SO CONFUSING

[hymen-restoration-project]

I miss being loved

[scensitive]

[boycritter]

theres no such thing as tmi to me. i want to live in your ribcage.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

beauty is an emotion actually

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

it exists only in our heads, as a reaction to our surroundings. it is a type of pleasure and attachment our minds experience in response to external stimuli. our ability to "feel" beauty is predictable and unpredictable both, and tied to our health and wellbeing and social and individual traits. beauty is not an objective truth about the world, but rather a way we experience it.

beauty exists because we evolved to see it. and I see beauty in that.

[wisterical13]

sometimes i feel down abt myself and then i remember that if i saw myself in public when i was younger (or even now) i would be a little bit happier for atleast a few seconds bc look its a cool queer alt person in public and then im happy again because im the kind of person me and my friends point out when we want to make eachother smile

[lilyflxwers]

i. The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath, Sylvia Plath / ii. As Consciousness Is Harnessed to Flesh: Journals and Notebooks 1964-1980, Susan Sontag / iii. Suddenly, It's December, Margaux Paul / iv. Waiting for This Story to End Before I Begin Another, Jan Heller Levi / v. The Picture of Dorian Gray, Oscar Wilde / vi. The Letters of Gustave Flaubert: 1830-1857, Gustave Flaubert / vii. unknown / viii. @inanotherunivrse / ix. @violentcherries / x. Heaven, Mieko Kawakami (thank u @aworsening for attaching the sources)

[fairycosmos]

don’t think intimacy will ever feel normal for me but i’m being really chill about it

[missing-childhood]

I’m afraid to say that my life is better with you around.

[bl00d-and-t3ars]

there's a very specific kind of anguish that comes from your life finally feeling okay again and all you can think about is when things weren't okay.