Healing, growing, loving...with Amy Kay.

Amy Kay is a holistic occupational therapist with 17 years of experience facilitating deep physical, emotional, and spiritual work in her clients. Her eclectic practice includes traditional rehab training (including expertise in cancer and lymphedema, head injury, post-partum retintegration, and chronic pain) as well as advanced training in craniosacral therapy, therapeutic yoga, energy medicine, and spiritual counseling. 

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A Starts Kindergarten- 5yo CST

A’s mom brought her in to see me the week before kindergarten started. Mom reported that A had been showing signs of increased anxiety. She was more rigid, more emotional, and “off”. When asked how she was feeling, A would say, “I have a lot of worries in my head”. Mom was my client and was familiar with my work. She hoped that I could help with grounding and rebalancing and help A “get her worries out” to set her up for success going into the new school year.

A knew me, and in fact, had played with my kiddo a few times. I was not a stranger to her. But when she arrived at the clinic, she appeared uncomfortable, guarded, and unsure. Her little shoulders were hiked toward her ears, she kept her arms crossed in front of her. She didn’t make eye contact. She would talk to Mom in whispers and avoided talking to me directly.

With gentle encouragement, she picked out some toys from the baskets in the waiting room, and we headed into the treatment room. Once in the room, Mom suggested she sit on my treatment table. Mom sat beside her. She wouldn’t look at me or talk, but she decided she was ok with lying down, as long as she could play with a magnet sketch toy.

Within minutes of starting the craniosacral therapy session, however, A started to relax. She softened her body, she let down her guard, and she explored what it was like to be on my table (or jumping off my table). She started to giggle and move her body. She started singing songs. And she asked to play with the plastic skull that I keep in the treatment room.

My plastic skull is a favorite toy for most of the kids I see. They want to hold it and understand it. They want to take it apart and explore how their body works. Holding pieces of the skull up to her face, and talking through the mask, she started singing songs about her day. With school starting, the change in routine was what worried her most. Learning and adjusting to a new schedule frightened her. Through a playful, sing-song dialogue, she started exploring her new schedule and grounding into it with her skull mask helping her feel safe and confidant.

It was remarkable to watch. She arrived tentative, guarded, unsure, and full of worries. And then she was wearing a skull mask, kicking her feet in the air, and singing through her new schedule with lightness and enthusiasm. She left my treatment room noticeably changed.

A made sense of the session and her new found confidence this way- “Amy opened up my head and took the worries out.” What I witnessed was an amazing girl opening up the “head” of my plastic skull, singing her worries through its “face” and walking confidently into this new phase of childhood. She moved and twisted and spun. She laughed and jumped and explored. She took command of her experience and rode that wave of confidence into her first days of kindergarten and beyond.

Have I mentioned how much I love my job?

Craniosacral therapy can support your child through the bumps and bruises of growing up, be they physical or emotional. Sessions can be booked online today.  

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Motherhood

I thought that I would remember each and every moment. But so many have vanished. I wish I had written them all down. If I close my eyes, I can still summon the feel of you against my chest, asleep in the rocker. I can just barely smell the top of your baby head, and I wonder if that moment will one day be inaccessible. 

I was there for all of your major firsts. I saw the excitement hit your face when you reached out and touched that stuffed elephant hanging above your head. You were so surprised. 

Was it an elephant or a dog? 

Maybe it was a giraffe??

I used to be there for your firsts, but now they happen with grandparents or teachers, soon to be replaced by friends or strangers. Those firsts mattered to me. You will never really understand until you see your own child’s firsts, just how much it really matters.

These days, you sit at the dinner table, and your belly laugh fills the room, a laugh that falls at the appropriate time in adult conversation. I look at you and wonder who this child is and where my innocent baby went?

There have been moments as a parent that have felt ENDLESS, where I could trick myself into believing that it would last. You would need me longer than I could possibly stand it. But instead, each day, I practice the agonizing skill of letting you go. 

How could this be? 

How could you have lived inside of me, squishing my bladder and poking my guts until I thought I couldn’t take it, and now... A BREATH later, you belly laugh at just the right moments in adult conversation, and I wonder if I will remember what your baby head smelled like when I’m 90. 

I love you.

And suddenly I realize that is the only part of you that is truly mine. 

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Facing my fears as a small business owner.

A few months ago, I was asked to write an article for Hiscox, my liability insurance carrier, about facing my fears as a small business owner. They were working on a campaign about facing fears and going for it and wanted to know how small business owners pushed through the dark moments. This was my reply:

I am a mom. When I decided to have a child, after years of thinking I didn’t want one, I had no idea that becoming a mom would radically change my identity and the way I saw the world. While I have multiple degrees and certifications and a variety of credentials listed after my name on my business card, while I have had a successful and important career, as a mother of a three-year-old, I am first and foremost a mom. As a career minded feminist, I did not see that one coming. And yet, it is the most rewarding and powerful shift in my life. I am a mom.

Now, why do I start here? This is an article about facing my greatest fears and taking the risk to start a business. Why should motherhood even be a talking point? Ahhh, but you see? My greatest fears and my greatest motivations come from this, that I am a mom.

When Ravi was born, my husband and I decided to make a bold move. We would leave our home, our solid connections, our friends and family in Los Angeles and move to Portland, OR. Our decision was simple, we wanted clean air, good food, and we wanted our little family to come first. I had taken extra time with Ravi and not yet returned to work, and money was tight. This was complicated by needing to sell our house in a terrible market. And my husband, a commercial photographer, would be leaving all his local agency contacts, and we were not sure what that would mean for him. There were moments where we felt absolutely out of our minds, and yet… there was this pull to Portland.

As an occupational therapist, I can find work anywhere. When Ravi was a year old, I took part-time work. And it was fine. I hated being away from my baby, and it was not work that was completely in alignment, but it was fine. And yet, my heart wanted more. I was always a very holistic, non-traditional therapist operating in a medical model that has little words or space for the modalities that are my heart’s calling. I had always wanted to own my own clinic that would offer of community of support with a holistic perspective.

I was offered an opportunity to start my practice under the umbrella of an existing physical therapy clinic. This was not my dream, but it felt like a supportive next step. So, I worked a day job and slowly built a presence in a new city where no one knew me or my work. I dealt with the growing pains of learning to market to people who didn’t know my name and learning how to package and sell my work in a way that fit my new market. I found I actually didn’t have to compartmentalize my work here. I could be both an experienced occupational therapist with expertise in oncology, head injury, chronic pain, and women’s health while also being seen as a great craniosacral therapist and spiritual counselor. In Portland, quite frankly, people expected it.

Eventually, I reached a tipping point. I had a solid awareness that my referrals were about to explode, and it didn’t feel in alignment to have that happen in someone else’s shop. Particularly as I had little control over anything but what happened in my little treatment room. But the thought of opening my own clinic meant more overhead, more risk, more time, and it meant standing forward in a still very new community. It meant that I would quickly be unable to hold another job, and it meant that I had to take a gamble. Would I be able to put food on the table? Would I have enough time with my kid? Would I be a complete and utter failure at a time when my son needed me most? Was it completely selfish of me to do this instead of just taking a nice, stable hospital job?

How I moved through this was to get back to the heart, to my truth as a mom. What I wanted most was to show my son what it looks like to be living an authentic life. I wanted to show him the courage I would hope for him when faced with a challenge. And I sought to create a business that kept my family as my priority. And so, I signed a lease on a space a mile from our home. I brought on an acupuncturist and a massage therapist who are amazing practitioners and dear friends. I designed a space that would be family friendly, for my family and for each family we serve. I opened myself up to the possibilities, and amazing things happened.

After almost 2 years of marketing and preparing, actually hanging my shingle and getting to work was quite easy. Referrals poured in, from friends, from clients, from other providers in the area. And when I wrote the mission statement for the clinic, Whole You LLC, I worked to  embrace the greater potential my work had:

Whole You, LLC is a holistic wellness collective comprised of experienced and talented practitioners who consciously serve the physical, emotional, psychological, energetic, and spiritual needs of clients. Practitioners enthusiastically work with babies, children, and adults in a peaceful, nurturing clinic in NE Portland.

I was happily surprised how putting my mission out in the world for my clinic quickly expanded the type of clients I attracted, the depth of the work done, and the excitement I had to show up each day. And the ability to collaborate with like-minded practitioners versus merely working alongside people who didn’t understand or appreciate my work was both healing and motivating as I moved through the early days of getting things running smoothly.

I am only 8 months into my new business. It truly is still in its infancy. And I mother it like I mother my child, with attention, with love, and with deep breaths when things get stressful. And we are thriving. My business is thriving. My little family is thriving, and I am thriving.

Yesterday, I received a card from another local business. The message written inside said, “On this day, we celebrate all the mothers you have mothered, and the good work you do in our community. You are a true gift!” The greatest gift to me in this message is that I am seen and celebrated for my mothering. Because I am successful, I am enlivened, I am constantly propelled forward by that power. I am a mom.

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Choosing Away From Mommy Guilt

One of the joys of my holistic occupational therapy practice is working with new moms. I help moms with pelvic floor and abdominal retraining, pelvic alignment, pain, strengthening and endurance building. Through craniosacral therapy and spiritual counseling, I help address imbalance on the physical, emotional, and energetic levels of mom's experience. I help address issues around self-honoring choices, how to find balance in a new, often chaotic, life experience, and how to commit to personal care while also navigating the world of loving, conscious parenting.

This isn't small or easy work. On the physical level, many moms deal with insecurity and frustration with learning to navigate the world with a very changed body, a body that often takes another 9 months (at least) to regain full strength and integrity. Moms learn to live life with profound and often painful sleep deprivation, negotiating life with the "Mommy-fog" that can be an absolute game changer for a mind that used to be sharp and quick. And then there are the judgements, the dreaded mind chatter and mommy guilt.  

I should be better.

My kid would be happier, if I was doing it right.

I should be strong and brave and balanced and flexible and perfect at all times because that's what it means to be a mom!

If I did it right, my baby would never be sick.

I'm a terrible mom because I lost my temper, needed a nap, forgot to pick up groceries, forgot what day it is, my baby doesn't sleep through the night, I parent differently than my neighbor, blah, blah, blah, blah... UGH.

Inevitably, this crap comes up for the moms I work with, and I get it. It came up, and continues to come up for me. As a mom, I am constantly battling the inner demons that would have me believe that I am a bad mom, that I'm not doing it right, or that I have somehow screwed up my child forever because of something I said or did or didn't do.

As my dear teachers, Ron and Mary Hulnick often say, "Growth is a process, not an event". And so, I walk my path in service to deepening in my loving for myself, for my child, for the women I serve, and the community of parents who are all doing the best they can.

What does that look like? Committing to self-care. Clarifying, understanding, and releasing judgments as they creep in. Seeking out and participating in a community of support. Asking for help when I need it. (And we all need it sometimes.) And reminding myself that growth can be messy, for me and most certainly for my kid. 

Mommy guilt is a choice. A choice I actively work to choose away from each and every day, before it gets the best of me. What path are you choosing?  

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Amy is an amazing healer in so many ways - body, mind and spirit!

Jennifer, Portland. 

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Spiritual Counseling at Whole You, LLC

She sat across from me, wrapped snuggly in her warm wool sweater. This was it.

“Are you ready to say the words?”

She flinched, hiking her shoulders slightly towards her ears, just for a moment, a slight look of pain crossed her face. That line between her eyebrows popped more firmly into view. But she took a deep breath. She wouldn’t hide from this.

“OK. I’m ready.”

“I forgive myself for judging myself as not good enough.”

“I forgive myself for judging myself…” The first few words were said confidently, and suddenly it appeared as if there was not enough air in the room, like she couldn’t possibly go on. But she filled her lungs anyway and continued. “...for judging myself as not good enough.” And the last of her artificial control crumbled and she began to sob, deeply, quietly in the chair.

“Again.”

She looked up at me with terror in her eyes.

“It’s going to be ok. Again.”

“I forgive myself for judging myself as not good enough.” This time it came out in one attempt. The tears still fell.

“And again.”

“I forgive myself for judging myself as not good enough…. I forgive myself for judging myself as not good enough… I forgive myself for judging myself as not good enough…”

With each complete sentence, her energy lightened and lightened.

“I forgive myself for judging myself as not good enough…”

“Because the truth is…”

She took a deep breath and pushed through. “Because the truth is I’m a divine being having a human experience. Because the truth is I AM good enough. Because the truth is I’m a precious gift.”

Her face glistened. Was it tears or stardust? It often felt like one and the same.

She laughed when I told her so. A deep, full belly laugh, much richer and authentic than the sobs that had rumbled there just moments before.

“I get it. In this moment I really, really get it. Thank you.”

And this is why I do this work.

Spiritual counseling is not for the faint of heart. In fact, a client once told me my work should come with a warning label at the door. ATTENTION ALL WHO ENTER! THIS WORK CAN BE REALLY HARD SOMETIMES AND HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BRING UP YOUR BIGGEST SHIT.

The day she suggested the warning, in a grumpy, irritated tone, I smiled knowingly. I had been there. Honestly, I still find myself there more often than I would prefer. And yet, she keeps coming, just as I keep showing up for my own work each and every day. Because my clients are courageous. 

Committing to this work means a commitment to accepting 100% responsibility for your experience. You are never upset because someone did something to you. No one can ever hurt you. You are upset because your issues, judgments, or limiting beliefs are bumping up against the world you see before you, and it pisses you off. This can be very difficult to swallow at first.

I’m always responsible for my upset?

But my mom hit me?

But I was abandoned?

But what about when he cheated on me?

Yep. Always. Your hurts are always your own. They are a choice.

But the gift in that is that you have the power to shift your experience. You have the power to heal your hurts, heal your judgments, and release yourself from suffering. You can’t change your mom who disappointed you, or the person who left, or the guy who cheated, but you can free yourself of the judgments that keep you in pain.

And that is such a rich gift.

Spiritual psychology holds the perspective that we are all divine beings having a human experience, living out our unique curriculum in this world in service to evolving in consciousness. Each upset is an opportunity for upliftment. Each healing is an opportunity to more fully understand the truth of who you are, pure loving consciousness.

Spiritual counseling provides a space of unconditional loving support where clients can clarify experience and understand the things that block them from their loving. Clients learn skills for clearing the way to peace and joy.

Drs. Ron and Mary Hulnick at University of Santa Monica say that “outer experience is a reflection of inner reality”. Our judgements are playing out on the movie screen of our lives. Our experiences in physical world reality give us the fuel to heal our inner wounds. It is only by changing the inner landscape, that the world will change. It is a gift and a privilege to be in service to that change.

To explore spiritual counseling as a supportive strategy for changing your inner landscape and your experience of physical world reality, contact me at Whole You, LLC.

The loving is waiting for you.

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I can't honestly describe it, though Amy assured me it's different every time. Gentle hands and a soft smile seemed to almost magically release old shoulder injuries and muscles long accustomed to computer work. I walked out with shoulders thrown back and head high - pretty sure I am three inches taller. Whatever Amy says, I'm pretty sure it's always magic.

Rachel, Portland

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i just want to give Amy Kay a stellar review. she is some kind of miracle magical witchy voodoo doctor or something. i started seeing her in march and after 2 sessions she literally left me breathless. i also saw her for a sacral joint problem i always have during pregnancy. after working on the joint for 20 mins or so with no more than finger tips, i felt and heard a "pop" and my pelvis popped back into alignment seemingly by itself. it stayed that way for 5 days, and remained that way even when i clumsily missed the last stair at my house and fell in the dark. this has never happened before (my joint is always out of place in pregnancy). i am just blown away by how freakishly powerful her very gentle cranio sacral treatments are! whoa. go see her if you need some bodywork done.

Rebecca, Portland

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Whole You, LLC opens in NE Portland!

I am happy to announce that we are open for business in NE Portland.

6504 NE Siskiyou St, Portland, OR 97213 [phone]

I opened Whole You, LLC with the intention of providing a safe, nurturing space to support the deepest levels of healing possible in my clients. I have been moved and awed by the work already unfolding here. I am excited to be of service at our new location in NE Portland.  

Holistic Occupational Therapy

Craniosacral therapy

Spiritual counseling

Oncology rehab

Lymphedema management

Postpartum support 

And we are working to add acupuncture and massage soon! Email me for September specials: [email protected]  

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Deconstructing My Elevator Speech

I have a love/hate relationship with my elevator speech. Well, hate is a strong word. Let's say that I love that I have worked to clarify and articulate my work in as clear and concise language as possible. It is important to be clear, and I love that I have done this, and continue to clarify as I evolve. The hate part... well, maybe resistance is a better word. The deep resistance I have for my elevator speech is that while its words resonate with me and the work that I do, it does little for sharing my experience, my background, or what it is we actually do in a session. The elevator speech- a precise and persuasive message meant to convey the skills, qualifications, and accomplishments of the individual in 30 seconds or less. And here is mine: I am a holistic occupational therapist with 14 years of experience facilitating deep physical, emotional, and spiritual work in my clients who are experiencing health challenges. My eclectic practice includes traditional rehab training (including expertise in cancer and lymphedema, chronic pain, and women's health) as well as advanced training in craniosacral therapy, therapeutic yoga, meditation/mindfulness training, and spiritual counseling. A beautiful, fantastic description of my practice that understandably brings up several questions and does little to actually convey the amount of training, education, or experience I have, beyond that I've been at it for 14 years. What is occupational therapy? Lymphedema? What do I mean by spiritual? What is a spiritual counselor? So, let's deconstruct my beautiful elevator speech. I am a holistic occupational therapist with 14 years of experience facilitating deep physical, emotional, and spiritual work in my clients who are experiencing health challenges. Occupational therapist- You don't know how many times I've been asked what an OT is...An occupational therapist believes that participation in meaningful activity shapes life experience and is essential to health and wellbeing. We work with people whose experience of illness or disability keeps them from doing the things they want and/or need to do, and we seek to empower change in service to our clients meeting their unique goals. We are master's level health professionals trained in the physical, psychological, and social experience of illness or disability. Am I a physical therapist? No. Will some of my work look like PT? Certainly. Depending on the day, I might kind of look like a social worker or a speech therapist or a teacher or a good friend. The difference is the perspective, the meaning behind our interventions, and the depth of knowledge in particular areas. I am an Oregon licensed, nationally board certified occupational therapist. And as my elevator speech mentions, I've been at this for 14 years. I am a holistic occupational therapist... facilitating deep physical, emotional, and spiritual work in my clients... In the medical model, I would say that the occupational therapist tends to be the most holistic allied health practitioner. We tend to see the bigger picture of whole body, whole life, whole family when we are assisting our clients. You don't typically come to an OT for "just a hand" or "just a shoulder". I call myself a holistic occupational therapist because I see my work as much broader and deeper work than it was when I resided fully within the medical model. Working in private practice with the particular training and perspectives that I operate under, I feel my practice is more holistic than traditional hospital work. Using interventions such as spiritual counseling and craniosacral therapy, I support my clients in seeing their current health challenges as an opportunity to do deeper work. They learn to dialogue with their body and understand the signs and symptoms of imbalance and what to do to regain optimal wellness. They explore their own personal curriculum- the judgments, issues, and lessons they are working on in this lifetime and how to navigate and support themselves through this curriculum. They discover the importance of emotions and how unresolved emotions affect their body on a physiological level. They exercise, stretch, and heal the physical body while doing a deeper level of healing, and they look forward with confidence as they co-create their reality. And they do this while meeting objective "traditional rehab" goals and experience improved strength and endurance, greater ease with activity, and active participation in activity that matters to them. (including expertise in cancer and lymphedema, chronic pain, and women's health) Cancer- I have a specialty in oncology rehab. Many of my clients are navigating cancer treatment or life after. Some of my clients are end-stage and are seeking support during this time of transition. Having run the outpatient occupational therapy program at City of Hope, a national cancer institute in Southern California, I have worked with hundreds of people navigating the cancer experience. I have extensive experience assisting breast cancer patients following surgery and radiation, reconstruction (if applicable), and beyond, and this is a population I really love to serve. Lymphedema- Lymphedema is a particular type of progressive, chronic swelling that can result from lymph system failure in the body. It is a common side effect of cancer staging (removing lymph nodes). I am a nationally board certified lymphedema specialist, (CLT-LANA). Chronic Pain- I started my OT career with an interest in chronic pain. I did six years of doctoral studies at the University of Southern California with a focus on the experience of chronic pain, particularly women's experience of chronic pelvic pain and how it affects issues of sexuality, identity, and life meaning. I have worked with clients experiencing a variety of pain challenges. Women's Health- I have a great love of working with women. Since having my son, I have done more and more pre/post-natal work and absolutely love it. I work with the pelvic bowl from an anatomical/alignment/strength perspective as well as an energetic and emotional perspective. I love supporting new moms with craniosacral therapy and enjoy assisting moms as they learn to coordinate and integrate and align their bodies following childbirth. ...advanced training in craniosacral therapy, therapeutic yoga, meditation/mindfulness training, and spiritual counseling. Craniosacral therapy- I am a craniosacral therapist trained through the Upledger Institute. I have extensive experience with this type of work. I actually stopped tracking my "treatment hours" when I passed 2000 hours of hands on treatment. This was 5 years ago. Therapeutic yoga- I have been a student of yoga for 14 years. I began my journey in Anusara yoga and found my home in Kundalini yoga a few years ago. I did a 6 month teacher training several years ago which had a therapeutic, Anusara-inspired style. I used to teach a "Yoga after Breast Cancer" class and a "Lymphatic Yoga" class in Los Angeles. I don't teach classes anymore, but it certainly influences my work. Meditation/Mindfulness Training- I have training in the use of meditation for healing and wellness from both a yoga perspective and a spiritual psychology perspective. Spiritual Counseling- I have a Master's in Spiritual Psychology from the University of Santa Monica (Class of 2010). The work I did at USM impacts my life on all levels each and every day and it deeply influences my work as a therapist today. So, there you go. Certainly longer than a 30 second sound bite, but that is my practice in a nutshell. I hope this is valuable as you seek out the practitioner that is best for you.

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I began seeing Amy four days after the birth of my second daughter. My midwife informed me that I had diastasis recti (also known as abdominal separation) and would need to be very careful lifting my baby and performing daily activities until the separation had reduced. Amy helped me with my abdominal separation and so much more. I met her every week for 15 weeks and at the end of the visits, my separation was minimal and greatly improved because of the exercises she had me do several times a day. More than that was the wonderful support she gave me as a mother and the extremely relaxing and healing craniosacral she did after we completed the exercises. I feel very fortunate to have found Amy and appreciate all her assistance to regain my strength. Carrie, Portland

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UPCOMING EVENT!!

Lifestyle Balance for Optimal Health and Well-Being with Amy Kay Tuesday, January 28, 7-8:30 pm, $12 Join Amy Kay, a holistic occupational therapist and spiritual counselor, and learn about the importance of a conscious commitment to balance in our lives. Explore the ways a balance of life’s activity (and inaction) can be seen as a spiritual practice and a key to optimal health and well-being on all levels. Use the conversation to inspire and direct your goals for the New Year!

New Rennaisance Bookshop, 1338 NW 23rd Ave, Portland, Oregon 97210

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Craniosacral therapy for the post-partum mom.

I have had an active craniosacral therapy practice for several years. Having done thousands of hours of treatment, I have had the fortune of supporting clients through cancer treatments, pain issues, migraines, TMJ, acute injuries, and chronic complaints. Some of my most favorite work, however, is supporting new moms with craniosacral therapy.

There are a variety of reasons it is good for the new mom from a physical standpoint. It can help release tissue restrictions, realign pelvic structures, help with pain related to childbirth or the strain of holding a newborn with a body that is not yet strong enough to maintain proper alignment.

In many ways, craniosacral therapy can be very good for the body of a new mom. But what I love most about sessions with new moms is that I get to lovingly support a mom as she learns to gift herself an hour to herself for supportive self-care. I get to help her relax at a deep level, as I hold a sacred space for her, just as she does for her baby 24 hours a day.

And as is common in craniosacral therapy sessions, I often get to support the emotional stuff that comes up when holding a safe space and gently working the tissue of the body. Insecurities, self-judgements, MOMMY GUILT!! It often comes rushing up, and we gently address it.

It is such an honor watching a new mom unwind, relax, and recharge in front of me. I love playing my small part to support her in being just the kind of mother she wants to be.  

[withamykay]

Living and Learning in a "What If" World

This article was first published on the New Connexion Spirituality Blog with the title "Living and Learning from Cancer".

As a holistic occupational therapist with a specialty in cancer, I often sit with clients and listen to them asking the big questions: Why do I have cancer? What is the purpose of all this? What is the meaning of my life?

It is actually why I love working with the cancer community. It is as if the treatment and management of their health issues has literally cut, burned, and removed all the typical barriers we as human beings put up against the big questions.

So many of us prefer to live like ostriches, with our head in the sand ... keep your head down, don’t rock the boat, maintain status quo, and everything will stay safe and right.

Except that it doesn’t.

Things don’t always stay safe and right, as hard as we try to control it. And don’t get me wrong, I have spent my fair share of time attempting white-knuckle control over my existence. And what happens? Things change. My world is turned upside down. Good, bad, unexpected, it doesn’t much matter. The point is it changes. And how do I make sense of that? For me, it brought me to asking the big questions that I hear coming from my clients. And so what can I do for them when they come asking the big ones?

Perhaps I don’t have all the answers for all people at all times, but I have found great freedom and joy operating from a spiritual psychology framework. From this perspective, we are all divine beings having a human experience. We each come into this human form to work our unique curriculum. By working that curriculum, we release judgments and limiting beliefs that block us from the understanding that we are love.

What If??

It is not for me to say this perspective is true or prove its worth. And it is not a perspective that works for everyone. But what would happen if you entered this “what-if” world with me? What if everything was being orchestrated for your upliftment? What if cancer and other health challenges were an opportunity to discover the truth of who you are? What if there is a great spiritual purpose to every challenge, upset and bump in the road?

When I enter into this space, something happens for me. I feel peace and loving. I sit with a woman who is sweaty and nauseated from chemo, and I see courage and opportunity. I hold hands with a woman as her husband passes, and I celebrate how he has moved, changed, and deepened loving for everyone he has touched in his transition.

Can cancer suck? Absolutely. I can feel angry or sad or frustrated as I work to release the judgments I hold regarding the way I think things should be. I can feel upset when I seek to control the things I cannot change. But as I work to release those judgments and free myself of those constraints, as I deepen into the awareness of the loving, suddenly I can see the gift. The very act of me working to heal the belief that “cancer sucks” has brought me deeper to my truth. And even that is a gift worth cherishing.

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Why should you see a lymphedema specialist?

This article was recently written for the Breast Friends newsletter. Breast Friends is a wonderful organization supporting women through the experience of breast cancer, ovarian cancer, and other women's cancers. I am sharing this article here, as I think the information is vitally important for so many. This article was tailored to the breast cancer population. The same applies to anyone who has lymph nodes removed.

I have recently connected with quite a few women who have had treatment for breast cancer and have never met with a lymphedema specialist. I find this troublesome. Research suggests that approximately 50% of patients who have axillary lymph node dissections will develop lymphedema. I don’t give this information to frighten you. Most of these cases, actually, will be very mild and easily managed with proper techniques. I am not concerned because I fear that 50% of women with lymph node dissections will wake up one morning with giant arms. That just isn’t the case. What bothers me is that a lack of knowledge can cause unnecessary anxiety and fear, and inaccurate information can have life-changing consequences.

I have heard far too many stories about anxiety, fear, even terror about lymphedema. Women do google searches and see worst case scenarios. The pictures keep them up at night and keep them living in fear. They seek out advice from therapists, or even physicians, who are not experts in lymphedema and are given inaccurate information that shapes future decisions.

“I was told I can’t go running ever again. I’m really upset about it because I love to run. I’m getting fat and so is my dog.”

“I know I can’t ever go on a plane again, and I had my heart set on a trip to Paris.”

“I had breast cancer. A big arm is just part of it. There is nothing that can be done.”

“I know I’m going to wake up with a giant, elephant arm. I’m just waiting for it.”

I have heard all of these stories and more. And they were all shaped by inaccurate information, lack of proper education, and fear.

So, why should you see a lymphedema specialist?

I believe every woman diagnosed with breast cancer who has lymph node sampling (axillary lymph node dissection and EVEN sentinel lymph node biopsy) should seek out a referral and evaluation by a certified lymphedema therapist. The therapist can take measurements of both arms to provide “baseline” measurements in case you have a complaint of swelling in the future. You can learn accurate information for the prevention, early detection, and management of lymphedema. You can rid yourself of inaccurate information and the fear that goes with it. You can develop a relationship with a skilled practitioner and know that you have someone to turn to if you have a problem in the future.

Knowledge is power. If you have had lymph nodes removed, seek out a lymphedema specialist today. If you happen to be in the Portland, OR area and are looking for help, I am board certified lymphedema specialist (CLT-LANA), and I'm happy to be of service.

[withamykay]

My body has always been communicating with me. I just didn't know how to listen. Under Amy's tutelage, I opened to a type of communicating, experiencing, through my bodily aches and pains. My body, our bodies, are capable of communicating the deepest sense of self-hood. With every session, Amy encouraged me to listen, to be still. What was my body communicating? Over time the communications became clearer. I have not mastered this method of communication; but, I am closer to a holistic mode of bodily healing. Thank you Amy.

Kristin

Portland, OR

[withamykay]

I was most impressed by Amy's capacity to attune to what I was experiencing while remaining objective: she holds a most loving space for clients while drawing from a seemingly inexhaustible source of wisdom and compassion. If you are considering seeking help from Amy, I'd say no need to look further.

Jeroen de Wit, MA. Owner of Source Energy Therapy, Los Angeles, CA.