Wolfy

[kastleofkink]

THE ULTIMATE BDSM MOVIE GUIDE - Updated

Secretary (2002): Arguably the best motion picture about an emerging BDSM relationship. The stars of the film give well rounded, nuanced performance of individual characters, not types. Maggie Gyllenhaal’s transformation from a shy, unhappy, and passive young lady to a happy, determined, and confident woman is marvellous. James Spader’s performance of a conflicted dominant is pitch perfect and brilliant.

Maitresse (1973): This French film was created with the advice of a professional Domina and includes real footage of S&M. It is a convincing love story about the romance between a well well-intentioned – if an ignorant young man – (Gérard Depardieu) and an emotionally guarded dominatrix (Bulle Ogier.) Vanilla audiences might be shocked by some of the scenes of S&M while today’s generation of BDSM purists will be alarmed by the numerous scenes in which people in bondage are left alone for long periods. Directed by Barbet Schroeder.

9 ½ Weeks (1986): An erotic classic directed by Adrian Lyne and starring Kim Basinger and Mickey Rourke. The terms S&M and BDSM never really come up and it’s easy for mainstream audiences to see it as kinky but mostly innocent fun – but D/s and S&M are still D/s and S&M not matter what you call them. The perfect choice for a date film when testing the waters with a vanilla lover or spouse. Say “Gee, this looks like an interesting film honey” at the video rental store.

The Story of O (1975): A tasteful adaptation of Pauline Réage’s classic French novel of sadomasochism, submission, and love. It’s classy. Never vulgar. The emphasis is on the dreamlike nature of the erotic fantasy. The drama comes from an internal struggle as O (Corinne Clery) tries to submit totally to the whims of the man she loves. Lots of lovely nude actresses, simulated sex, and sadomasochism. Directed by Just Jaeckin, the director of Emmanuelle. French title: Histoire d’ O

Quills: A very well done, wonderfully cast, and intellectually stimulating. It’s a film adaptation of a play about the final days of the Marquis de Sade (somewhat fictionalized.) The focus on the film is less on the eroticism of the divine Marquis’s writing (which has not really appealed to me) and more on questions of ethics and the politics of pornography and censorship. The most erotic scenes are more or less vanilla but they feature some lovely actresses including Kate Winslet. (yum!) Never has necrophilia looked so appealing.

Crash (1997): James Spader and Holly Hunter star in this film by David Cronenberg based on a novel by J.G. Ballard about a subculture of people who intentionally crash their cars for erotic thrills.

BASIC INSTINCT (1992): Paul Verhoeven’s erotic phenomenon starred Michael Douglas as Nick Curran, a detective investigating the case of a rock star who was brutally stabbed to death with an ice pick by a mystery blonde. The prime suspect is Catherine Tramell (Sharon Stone), an icy, bisexual writer with a penchant for bondage. While the leg-crossing scene is the most iconic, there are also several sexy BDSM scenes here featuring Stone tying Douglas to the bed and riding him like Seabiscuit.

BELLE DU JOUR (1967) “Do as you wish with me,” says Séverine Serizy. In surrealist Master Luis Buñuel’s 1967 film, Serizy (Catherine Deneuve) is a young housewife whose sexual relationship with her husband is nonexistent. To satiate herself, she fantasizes about BDSM. Eventually, she begins working at a brothel under the name “Belle Du Jour” while her husband is at work, fulfilling her sexual fantasies and desires—including with a young gangster, Marcel, who brings her to the brink and back with his active dominance.

PREACHING TO THE PERVERTED (1997) ·An English comedy written, directed and produced by Stuart Urban about a Member of Parliament’s attempts to prosecute group of perverts participating in consensual S&M. While a few of the scenes are a little contrived (e.g. presented to make a point on the film maker’s behalf) and while I would disagree with a few of the pronouncements made by the perverts (i.e. “You’re either a dom or a sub”) the film is very well researched and constructed – much better than Exit to Eden which it resembles somewhat. The dialogue used in the court scenes are lifted from actual British trials. The usual arguments against consensual sadomasochism are presented by the forces or law and decency and suitably addressed by Mr. Urban. Many of the extras and performers in the Fetish club and party scenes were real participants and performance artists drawn from the British Fetish underground. Voyeurs will be pleased with the eye candy and drinking game enthusiasts are advised to drink every time hot pink appears. Julie Graham is terrific as the head slave. She’s convincing, engaging, and very, very sexy. (But then this critic has a weakness for beautiful, nearly bald-headed women.)

THE PET (2006) This movie covers the idea of a relationship based on power exchange- but not in the best way. The plot is a little out there and tries to include too much into one movie. If you’re already in the lifestyle, then watch to discuss with your partner or friends… if you’re not in the lifestyle and are looking for an inside look then you should avoid it! 

KINK (2013) A documentary by James Franco looking into kink.com and BDSM dynamics mixed with pornography. A very honest look and shedding a more positive light on the practices. “They aim to demystify the BDSM lifestyle, and to serve as an example and an educational resource for the BDSM community.” 

NYMPHOMANIA VOL. 1 & 2 (2013) This movie is exactly what you would expect from director Lars von Trier – lots of artistic interpretations, avant guard approaches, and a general feeling of uneasiness with a dash of confusion. On top of it all … piles and piles of weird sexual encounters as a self-proclaimed nymphomaniac tells her life story not as much BDSM as other movies, but there are some brief encounters.

BODY OF EVIDENCE (1993): Madonna & William DaFoe

THE MISTRESS (2014)

What starts as a beautiful and strangely innocent affair between a vulnerable teenage romantic and a French S&M mistress soon becomes more dangerous. Director: Stephen LanceWriters: Gerard Lee (screenplay), Stephen Lance (story and screenplay) Stars: Harrison Gilbertson, Emmanuelle Béart, Anna Ryan 

Fifty Shades Series is an American film series that consists of three erotic romantic drama films, based on the Fifty Shades trilogy by English author E. L. James. It is distributed by Universal Studios and stars Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan as the lead roles Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey, respectively. Sam Taylor-Johnson directed the first film and initially, she was slated to be the director of the sequels as well, however subsequently the second and third films were directed by James Foley

The first film, Fifty Shades of Grey, was released on February 13, 2015, while the second, Fifty Shades Darker, was released on February 10, 2017. Fifty Shades Freed, the third film, was released on February 9, 2018.

My Wonder Women (2017)

Walk all over me (2007) 

The Duke of Burgrundy (2014) 

SM Rechter (2009) 

Ex Dominatrix (2018) 

Going Under (2004)

LESSER KNOWN AND LESS KINKY DVDS

EYES WIDE SHUT (1999): A film by Stanley Kubrick starring Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman. Most of the film is a deadly bore made even more boring by the bland performance by Tom Cruise. But it picks up when Tom Cruise’s character sneaks into a lavish masked orgy hosted by rich hedonists. While it’s not really about BDSM, the ornate rituals and Catholic church influenced hierarchy to make it interesting to D/s enthusiasts.

THE IMAGE (1975) Technically classified as adult, but it takes you on a wild ride and makes you feel the journey the characters are taking. The directing is quite beautiful for a film that gets so explicit in some scenes - if you like filmography and pornography you will love this interesting take on a sadomasochistic relationship

MOONLIGHT WHISPERS (1999) A Japanese love story between two schoolmates - the boy is a masochistic and the girl transforms into a sadist to please him. The filmmakers boldly portray the fetishes without judgment and allow you to relate to the characters. You’ll empathize with them even if you don’t understand or agree with their actions. I recommend this for people who are intrigued with S/M and are looking to explore it more

BEYOND VANILLA (2001) This documentary is eye-opening and graphic for most people. The production quality is poor and the film seems to have meshed together in an incoherent way. It does show a look into lots of different kinks, though. Might be good to check out if you’re looking for images of extreme kinks. Don’t view this looking for an insight into the psyche of kinksters.

HEADSPACE (2003) This documentary provides a realistic look into a sadomasochistic relationship. It is quite graphic at times and may be disturbing for some viewers. If S/M is something that interests you and you’re looking hearing from real-life practitioners, then this may be for you. FYI - It can be a tad hard to find since there are a bunch of other movies, documentaries, or shows with the same name.

SUBMISSION OF EMMA MARX (2013) This is an adult movie but portrays an interesting look at a dom and sub relationship. The relationship is a much more accurate (and healthy) portrayal of a power-exchange based relationship- what 50 shades gets wrong, this one gets right. However, If you’re offended by hardcore sex scenes- skip over this option and keep going down the list

REMEDY (2013) This film is about a young woman’s journey from the underground kink scene to the professional kink scene. The interesting thing about this movie is that all scenes are based on the director’s own sessions. It thoroughly explores most aspects of commercial BDSM. A great insight if you’re looking into working in the industry or becoming a customer.

DARK SECRETS (1996): Directed by John T. Bone. Written by Jean-Marc Rocher. This is a shot on video erotic thriller featuring B-movie star Monique Parent and glamour models including Julie Strain and Doria Rone. It also stars Justin Carroll, Chanda, Tom Crowl, and Joe Estevez. If you’re in the mood for an intelligent film with an intriguing story and nuanced acting keep looking. However, if you’re looking for softcore erotica with beautiful women and nothing else you’re more likely to be pleased. Some will be disappointed that most of the women were artificially — and excessively — augmented but some of the S&M play — some hot wax play, some plastic wrap mummification, some flogging, some verbal abuse, some violet wand play — is interesting. More importantly, the girl on girl sex scene between Monique Parent and Julie Strain is among the hottest softcore scenes of its kind. Here’s the plot: An aspiring young female reporter goes undercover to investigate a handsome eligible bachelor Millionaire with Dark Secrets and she falls in love with him. But do his Dark Secrets include murder — or just kinky sex? Alternate title Julie Strain’s Dark Secrets. 91 minutes.

De SADE (1969): Biopic about the Marquis de Sade starring Keir Dullea and John Huston

EXIT TO EDEN: a Moderately funny comedy based on a novel by Anne Rice. Gives a positive but inaccurate presentation of the BDSM community. The production team meant well but they just didn’t get it.

THE NOTORIOUS BETTIE PAGE: Standard biopic about Fetish icon and 1950’s American pin-up model Betty Page. As played (very well) by Gretchen Mol, Betty is an attractive woman and a sympathetic person but not an especially interesting character. She has no reservations about her choices seeing no conflict between posing nude for photographs and her devout Christian faith. While her views are enlightened and refreshing, they don’t make for dramatic moments of introspection or self-discovery. The story lacks dramatic tension: While her life is not without it’s heartbreaks and difficulties, she emerges seemly unscathed from some really harrowing tragedies. What really saves the film are the depictions of the repressive America of the 1950s and the other historical figures from America’s sexual history that Betty encounters such as Irwin & Paula Klaw, John Willie, and Bunny Yeager. (Admittedly this critic is not a huge fan of Betty Page’s work.) Written by Mary Harron & Guinevere Turner and directed by Mary Harron.

BETTIE PAGE REVEALS ALL (2013) A documentary, including audio tapes from Bettie Page herself, looking at the life of this iconic pin-up girl influenced people like Dita Von Tease and Huge Heffern, not to mention mainstream kink in general.

MOONLIGHT WHISPERS (1999) A Japanese love story between two schoolmates - the boy is a masochistic and the girl transforms into a sadist to please him. The filmmakers boldly portray the fetishes without judgment and allow you to relate to the characters. You’ll empathize with them even if you don’t understand or agree with their actions. I recommend this for people who are intrigued with S/M and are looking to explore it more

STRANGELAND (1998): Dee Snider – of the band “Twisted Sister” – plays a “Captain Howdy”, a sadist who frequents Internet chatrooms looking for vulnerable teenagers to abduct and torture. This critic hasn’t seen this film but be warned: Other reviews were universally negative.

SWEPT AWAY: A vehicle for Madonna directed by her husband Guy Ritchie. The film was panned by critics.

CRUISING: Very controversial motion picture about the gay leather bar scene of the 70s. It’s borderline homophobic but it contains scenes filmed in the leather bars of the day and features real leather men as background talent.

BATMAN RETURNS Michelle Pfeifer as the latex-clad, single tail whip welding Catwoman. Me-YOW! Also staring Michael Keaton as Batman. Tim Burton makes it look like a German Expressionism film. One expects Dr. Caligari and Count Orloc to turn up any time. Indeed one character is named Max Shreck (after the actor who played Count Orloc in Nosferatu, the first film adaptation of Dracula.)

CATWOMAN (2004): How bad can a film be if it has Halle Berry kicking butt and prancing about in a skimpy leather outfit? Pretty bad. But now with the wonders of technology, you don’t have to sit through an inane plot, predictable characterization, and over the top direction. Just fast forward to the good stuff like Halle Berry licking cream from a shot glass.

COLOR OF NIGHT (1994): A psychological thriller and murder mystery in the format of Basic Instinct and Jade. What makes this movie relevant to this list is subplot plot about a kinky relationship between a psychologist played by Bruce Willis and a beautiful and mysterious woman played by the incredible Jane March.

A DANGEROUS METHOD (2011) David Cronenberg is no stranger to BDSM—take the brilliant “device” sequence in Dead Ringers—and this film provides a fascinating psychoanalytical exploration of humiliation. Sabina Spielrein (Keira Knightley) is being treated at a psychiatric hospital in Zurich by Carl Jung (Michael Fassbender). Her frenzied condition was, it seems, caused by the simultaneous humiliation and sexual arousal she felt when her father spanked her naked as a child. At Freud’s (Viggo Mortensen) apparent suggestion, Jung and Spielrein begin a hot and heavy affair—one that includes bondage and plenty of spanking (by Fassbender, no less).

BITTER MOON (1992)This is legendary filmmaker (and fugitive from justice) Roman Polanski’s stab at BDSM. Nigel (Hugh Grant) and Fiona (Kristen Scott Thomas) are a bored, married couple on a cruise to Istanbul, passing through India. They come across Mimi (Emmanuelle Seigner) and her paraplegic husband, Oscar (Peter Coyote), a couple very into BDSM. Oscar first tormented Mimi, humiliating her constantly and forcing her into an abortion, then, after Mimi renders him paraplegic, she relishes both dominating and humiliating him, having sex with other men in front of him. Nigel finds himself taken by Mimi, but she may prove too hot and twisted for him to handle.

AFTER FALL WINTER (2011)

FRUITS OF PASSION (1981)

THE BUNNY GAME (2010)

THE PIANO TEACHER (2001)

MODERATELY & TENUOUSLY KINKY

Birthday Girl: All too brief scene of Nicole Kidman nude in bondage.

Blue Hawaii: Elvis Presley spanks his leading lady

Boxing Helena (1993): Directed by Jennifer Chambers Lynch and starring Julian Sands and Sherilyn Fenn. It’s about sex, obsession, and possession taken to an extreme. It’s somewhat reminiscent of The Collector. It would be unfair to tell more.

Cat People (1982): Erotic horror film or an erotic film with moments of horror. Of particular interest is Nastassja Kinski’s bondage scene.

Collector, The (1965): A psychological thriller based on a novel by John Fowles and starring Terence Stamp and Samantha Eggar. A introverted man kidnaps and imprisons a woman in the hope of forcing her to love him. The film does not end happily.

Fight Club: (1999) A great film that covers a lot of ground. One of the many plot elements that makes it relevant to the list is an underground club where men go to beat the c**p out of each other. The goal isn’t winning. It’s fighting. The movie is brutal and violent but a lot more. Edward Norton and Brad Pitt star. David Fincher (of The Game) directs. Based on the kick-butt novel of the same name by Chuck Palahniuk.

The Game: None of the outwardly recognizable trapping of BDSM and not very kinky in an erotic way but this critic argues that once seen in its entirety this is the best film depiction of a rigid, uncompromising man’s journey of discovery of his repressed masochism and deep-seated need to submit.

Kiss Me Kate: Another movie musical with a spanking scene

Marquis: Directed by Henri Xhonneux and starring François Marthouret and Valérie Kling. Another “Marquis de Sade in prison” film but in this one, the story is performed by puppets.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith: Doug Liman’s film remake is most famous for being the movie where current husband-and-wife duo Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie first got together. In the film, they play a happily married couple who both lead double-lives as spy-assassins. When they’re forced to target each other, that’s when the shit hits the fan. Now, this isn’t a BDSM-themed film per se, but there is a fun sequence featuring Jolie in full leather dominatrix gear smacking around a handcuffed mark with a riding crop—before snapping his neck. 

The Wild One: A terrible film that has somehow become a classic. No S&M but Marlon Brando’s performance as a biker has become iconic for the Leather community.  

FRENCH FILMS

Irreversible: (2002) Horrible and extreme! An art film meant to shock and disgust — and it succeeds even with this jaded critic. For those looking forward to seeing Moica Bellucci’s sex scene be forewarned: It is violent, degrading, and repulsive – in a bad way! The only reason for including this film on this list is because it includes a scene taking place in a French Leather bar. (But many Leather men will take offence at the implication that non-consensual sex is acceptable in their community.) Starring Albert Dupontel, Vincent Cassel, and Monica Bellucci. Directed by Gaspar Noé.

The Piano Teacher (2002): Where Secretary showed how BDSM can be a positive element in a healthy relationship, this film illustrates the reverse. But the film’s makers were not intent on bashing a lifestyle. Rather they were being psychologically truthful about a desperately unhappy woman in an untenable situation played by the marvellously subtle and expressive Isabelle Huppert. Against her better judgment title character gives into her repressed masochism at the hands of a persistent admirer. When she confides in him about her desires he’s at first repulsed. Later he participates wholeheartedly in her fantasies but without concern for her health and safety. She doesn’t recognize how extreme and costly it would be to act out her fantasies and he’s clueless about the niceties of negotiation and safe words. The result is painful to watch.

Sade (2000): Inspired by the novel by Serge Bramly staring Daniel Auteuil as Marquis de Sade and Isild le Besco as a spirited young woman who seeks pleasure at the hands of the Divine Marquis. While the setting is historical, the style of the film is blandly contemporary with naturalistic performances. Daniel Auteuil’s Divine Marquis is unexpectedly passionless. Those of us who expect a larger-than-life style period film — think Dangerous Liaisons and Amadeus — will find the film bland and slow.

GERMAN MOVIES:

Punish Me (2006) (aka Verfolgt)

Seduction: The Cruel Woman (1985)

A Woman in Flames (1983)

DOCUMENTARIES

Fetish: Pain or Pleasure? (2006)

Fetishes (1996): Nick Broomfield

The Hidden Fuhrer: Hitler’s Sexuality: Was Adolf Hitler gay? The documentary is fascinating and entertaining but it ultimately fails to prove it either way. In addition to arguing whether he was or wasn’t, the film covers the history of gay culture in Germany. Of particular interest to historians of Leather culture is a deleted scene in the bonus section of the DVD that covers the influence of Nazi uniforms on the art of Tom of Finland.

Sick: The Life and Death of Bob Flanagan, Suprmasochist (1997)

Whole: There are some people – perfectly rational in every other way – who feel a deep-seated psychological need to be amputated. Is it socially responsible to allow (sane) people to mutilate themselves? There’s no easy answer.

MOVIES FEATURING PROTOCOL

The Caine Mutiny (1954): US Navy protocol. Written by Stanley Roberts from the novel by Herman Wouk. Directed by Edward Dmytryk. Starring Humphrey Bogart, José Ferrer, Van Johnson, Fred MacMurray, and a host of other familiar names and faces.

Gosford Park (2001): English peerage and servant protocol. Directed by Robert Altman.

JAPANESE MOVIES

Three Films About Sada Abe: Sade Abe is famous in Japan for the death and partial dismemberment of her lover in 1936. In her youth she was raped. As an adult she killed her lover by erotic asphyxiation and cut off his penis and testicles – which she kept with her while she wandered through Tokyo for three days. After her capture, she explained that she murdered her lover out of love and a desire to possess him totally and exclusively. The crime was a media sensation. There was a lot of sympathy for her and she has since become a cultural icon of sorts. There have been at least three films about the incident.

A Woman Called Sada Abe (1975): soft core porn version directed by Noboru Tanaka and staring Junko Miyashita as Sada and Hideaki Ezumi as her lover.

In the Realm of the Senses (1976): an art film with explicit sex directed by Nagisa Oshima and staring Eiko Matsuda as Sada and Tatsuya Fuji as her lover. Explicit, erotic, and well made but this critic was bored.

Sada (1998): a Very stylish and kinetic retelling of the story with less sex than the other two.

Audition (2000): A very suspenseful and disturbing horror film with a great underplayed femme fatale performance. A lonely ageing widower decides to find a new wife by staging auditions for a non-existing television series. The winner appears to be a demure old fashioned girl but she turns out of be an angry, predatory sort of later day Sada Abe. Think of “Isla the she-wolf of the SS” as played by a geisha. Directed by Takashi Miike and staring Ryo Ishibashi as the widower and Eihi Shiina as the object of his affections.

The Bondage Master: Japanese “direct to video” film with a simplistic but positive presentation of the Japanese fetish community.

Flower and Snake (Hana to Hebi) (2004).

Moonlight Whispers (1999)

School of the Holy Beast (1974): An “Erotic-Grotesque” with a plot that seems lifted from the over-heated and uncensored imaginations of High Gothic novelists like M. G. “Monk” Lewis. Forbidden secrets! Murder! Betrayal! Naked Japanese Catholic nuns! Hot (softcore) Lesbian Sex between Japanese Catholic nuns! Naked Japanese Catholic nuns flogging themselves! Naked Japanese Catholic nuns whipping each other! A sex-crazed Japanese Catholic priest! A sex-crazed Mother Superior! Ravishment! Incest! This film has everything including the yummy Yumi Takigawa. It was released in 1974 but it opens with a scene of swinging Tokyo that seems lifted from an Austin Powers film. Director: Norifumi Suzuki. Japanese title: Sei ju gakuen

Spanking Love (1994)

Tokyo Decadence (1992): This dark, cerebral film tells the unhappy story of a professional call girl in love with and rejected by a married musician. While it has been marketed in the U.S. as an erotic film, it is more a commentary on Japanese society by Ryû Murakami, a Japanese novelist and social critic. S&M is a symbol for the troubles of Japanese society in the years of prosperity. As a professional domina explains wealth saying “It’s wealth without pride. It creates anxiety, which drives our men into masochism.” The film has erotic scenes of S&M play but it’s really not worth watching unless your interest is more intellectual than carnal. Director: Ryû Murakami. Japanese title: Topâzu

A new Love in Tokyo (1994) 

R100 (2013) 

Sweet Whip (2013) 

Here’s a HUGE list (courtesy of IMDB) of BDSM themed movies or documentaries.

[ms-renee-lanes-sissy-slut]

Cool

[cyborgsmanifesto]

the sex ed guide your parents didn't give you

how to put a condom on

where to get free birth control

the hymen debunked 

cleaning your vibrators 

how to avoid pressures

signs you may be pregnant

safe guide to anal sex

all about dental dams

disabled sexual resources

what is hiv?

feminist porn

female ejaculation

fisting 101

communication during sex

setting sexual boundaries

bdsm vs abuse

lube during sex

the clitoris

sex education games

understanding gender

what to do if your nudes were leaked

intersex

sexual consent

all about masturbation

tips for your first time

[femme-en-feu]

reblogging because sex ed is usually shit but it’s really really important

[her-majesty-kiara-deactivated20]

I don’t consider this nsfw because this is actually important and people need to get educated.

[pitrsattabhaadmeinjaa]

Because I’m pretty sure our desi parents won’t teach this

[anghellrose-deactivated20180626]

TRANS WOMEN RESOURCES MASTER POST

I tried to dig up as many resources and tutorials as possible from old master posts and normals posts as a lot of people have been complaining about the lack of resource posts for trans women. If you have anything to add please go ahead

CLOTHES ETC

Fashion71 (F/M)

ClothingUnder10 

$5 Fashions 

TenFifteen 

TenDollarMall (F/M) (No international shipping)

Eastclothes 

Gojane 

Dresslink 

Moddeals 

dress lily 

sammy dress

brave store 

viejos amores

chiara fashion 

love culture 

ami club wear 

fashion 71

east clothes

Miss A  (Accessory/makeups $1 shop)

glitter  Accessory/makeups

kmms  Accessory/makeups

mba cosmetics  Accessory/makeups

Cheap makeup (ELF)

MAKEUP TUTORIALS ETC

How to hide stubble (Tumblr post)

How to Contour and Highlight Using Makeup (video)

How to Apply Eyeliner with a Spoon (video)

How to Apply Foundation (video)

How to Apply Blush (video)

How to Apply Eyeshadow (video)

tutorials for beginners

quality makeup for less money

choosing foundation

ask mod li about makeu

How to apply makeup for the absolute beginner

 [trans-specific, p. useful]

Foundation for Dark Skin (2) (3) What products are and how they are used

A brand that makes products specifically designed to go over stubble

What brushes do what

, 

(2)

How to Choose Foundation

How To Apply Eyeliner (Using Tape)

WIGS

amphigory

lock shop

funny wig

quality low budget wigs

cute hairstyles on pinterest

more cute short femme hair

hairstyle guide & beauty

GL Wigs

Wowwigs

Arda Wigs

Wig Salon

Hairbird

Others (in list format from a myriad of sources)

TUCKING

tucking and creating gaffe [video] 

tucking forum and thread 

Tucking How-to Guide

BREASTFORMS

sewing pattern for silicone bead forms

low budget diy breast forms [video] 

creating cleavage with bras [video] 

“illusion” cleavage with makeup [video] 

Realistic Breast Form Tutorial (Video)

The Breast Form Store

Cheap (Sale) Breast Forms

Breast Form Adhesive Discs (For wearing breast forms without mastectomy bra)

How to create cleavage using a silicone bra (video)

Measuring Bra Size for Trans Women

Mastectomy Bras with Built In Flap for Breast Forms

Breast Form Adhesive Discs (For wearing breast forms without mastectomy bra)

How to make home made breast forms

amoena

OTHER

Women’s Clothing Terminology Chrysalis (Lingerie for Trans Women, autoplay music) Cheap Control/Shaping Briefs TheLeelahProject (Provides free essentials to those who cannot afford them)

surgery booklet 

hrt booklet

Trans Health Matters: Trans Women

Bust enlarging pads

Bum enlarging shapers

Transgender advice and resources list

Transfriendly- online forum for trans community

[admitimasissyforbbc-deactivated]

Rebloging for myself Good stuff in here

[susanbitv-deactivated20181215]

I had to re-post this, I hope it helps lots and lots of other gurls!

[ssorensenxo-blog]

Reblogging for the hiding stubble part

[lisafunn]

Love all this

[reyna-312]

💗🎯👍💗

[paulaboner]

This is a great post, with something for girls with all levels of experience……Shamelessly borrowed this one but the message should be spread…….Paula xxx

[feiyuekungfushoes]

[tiffanyvanbuuren]

Inspirational!

[sluttysubamber]

Have to try this workout… especially glutes!!!

[mistress-janes-posts]

Are you looking for a mistress to train you hard to become a perfect sissy slut?

[taichi-kungfu-online]

Find the best workout routines and training plans for you to do at home or in the gym. Choose from killer HIIT workouts, abs exercises, arm moves, lower-body workouts, yoga poses, CrossFit, and more!

The professional Tai Chi Swords on: http://www.icnbuys.com/tai-chi-swords.

[horsefly7553]

Even if most of these are ideal for women, it won’t hurt for me to start doing some of these to tone my own muscles!

[beastwithouttheharlot]

Some exercises to help you be a better girl

[cheap-slut]

Good girls exercise to make themselves prettier

[blowingcloudsblog]

This is awesome!!

[harley-triumph]

Shopping List for New Sissies/CDs

Make up

Foundation

Concealer

Matte Blush

Eyeliner pencil

Mascara

Matt eye-shadow without shimmer (harder colors come later)

Brow pencil

Lipstick

Lip gloss

Lip liner

Make up remover and wipes

Clothes

Panties

Stockings

Fishnets

Garter belt

Bra

Corset

Sports bra

Leggings – Colorful

Heels

Body stocking

Body shapers (waist cincher, spanx shapewear etc)

Teddy or camisole

Pastel Tee Shirts

Mini skirt

Mini Dress

Summer sun dress

Accessories

Sunglasses

Wig

Eye lashes (self adhesive)

Bangles

Necklaces

Ear rings (clip on)

Belt

Rings

Nail polish

Nail polish remover

Other products

Moisturizer and skin care

Cleansers

Cosmetic bag

Suitcase

Make up bag

Body scent and fragrances

Body lotion

[white-sissy-in-heat]

Thisis a help to sissy to find shes better lingerie and hells to make happy shes boyfriend i hope You enyoy this sissy!! ❤️❤️❤️

[bdsmcop]

[strappedown-deactivated20250731]

Just a word of advice, sleep sacks are for sleeping. If you find yourself being trussed up in one after an evening of fun and exciting bondage positions, or even if your buddies are forcing you into one early in the afternoon, don’t expect to get out right away. The point of these things is to control you for awhile so everyone else can get much needed rest so the play can continue later and nobody is crabby or too tired. If you gab too much, don’t be surprised if they gag and hood you as well. Forced naps don’t work if you spend the entire time talking or saying things like “Hey I’m bored” or “Let me cum”

If you are lucky enough to be placed in one and forced to cum right away, be happy (you got off, right?) but don’t be expecting to get out immediately. Getting off is like a natural sedative. You should just relax, slow your breathing, and drift away to sleep until they are ready to use you again.

I actually prefer being teased and edged until I’m exhausted, and am no longer hard. After all that struggling and writhing in the inescapable confines of the sack, I’m too tired to do anything but lay there in a restless, frustrated, state. I then doze in and out of sleep, waking up hard and dripping, and unable to do anything about it.

I don’t get nearly the rest I need, but my captor will have had his proper rest, so he can start on me all over again. Get me all worked up, edge me all over again, until I’m so exhausted I don’t care that he is strapping a chastity belt on me, and too weak to resist as he transfers me out of the sack and into my morning straitjacket.

[puppyboyenico]

I love this so much. Just keep me bound and horny all night while you rest up and regain your strength to use me again tomorrow!

[misogynistowner-deactivated2017]

Black Out Lenses

I have just discovered that contact lenses can be used to render someone completely and temporarily blind. I love the concept;

They can’t be yanked away or come loose like a blindfold. They dont cover up the face of a pretty little thing and gosh darn it do they not look intriguing. Talk about control. You could bring your girl out on the town and pretend she’s blind. Maybe leave her to stumble around in darkness until she panics. You could put handcuff on her and let her try to get around the house blind for a day like a punishment. You could put them in and let her service a number of men without her ever knowing who they were.  Here is a video of a girl, wearing them, being used. Sold here, here and here.  All that I am lacking now is a girl obedient enough to accept me controlling even her sight.

[dominantlife]

12 Traits of a True Dom

1. He declines being called Sir, Master or any other grandiose title from the start. Until a relationship has been agreed he knows he’s a human being just like you, on the same level as you. He will owe you that respect and courtesy from the beginning. He declines being called ego-inflating names unless a dynamic has been explicitly agreed by both parties.

2. He looks after your interests. He will be on your side and will want you to be fulfilled in a relationship. He will be prepared to walk away from a relationship, if he believes your needs will be better met by somebody else. In fact he will be more than happy to introduce you to somebody else who will meet your needs better than him, even if that means he will lose you.

3. He doesn’t criticise other people, particularly other doms, behind their backs. He doesn’t feel threatened by other doms and doesn’t see them as competition. He doesn’t belittle or talk bad about other doms or tries to eliminate or undermine “competitors”.

4. He doesn’t try to dominate the conversation or gratuitously lead a group onto something just to prove to everyone and himself how domly he is. He will let other people have their say, without trying to hoard the limelight. He is a true team player who puts the needs and interests of the group before himself. He is interested in the team winning, not him winning.

5. He doesn’t prey on the vulnerable. He doesn’t hang around the entrance of munches or clubs looking for “fresh meat”. He doesn’t try to take advantage of inexperienced submissives and use their lack of knowledge to his advantage. On the contrary, he will protect those new and vulnerable and do what he can to guide them in the right direction.

6. He doesn’t instigate politics, bitching and division between camps. He is not prepared to partake in them and will try to minimise conflict whenever possible. He has a conciliatory tone and tries to build bridges, not burn them, whilst still defending what is right.

7. He’s approachable. He’s friendly and welcoming and accepts everybody as they are. He keeps his ego in check and doesn’t carry himself with a swagger or in a threatening or arrogant manner. He’s not in possession of the truth. He knows an überdom is quite the opposite of a true dom.

8. He admits to his mistakes. He’s happy to say sorry. He knows that being a dom doesn’t mean he’s perfect. He will own up to his errors and will make reparation whenever possible. If he makes a mistake during play he’ll apologise sincerely and make sure it doesn’t happen again.

9. He’s comfortable with a sub who is more intelligent, skilled and capable than him. He knows that being a dom doesn’t mean he has to be the best at everything. He’s quite happy to take instruction from her submissive and let her teach him what he doesn’t know. As an example, he’s happy to take directions from her when he’s driving.

10. He has nothing to prove. He’s comfortable in his own skin and doesn’t need to prove to anybody how “dominant” he is. He doesn’t try to live up to some expectation of what a dom should be. He’s confident and sure of himself and is untroubled by others disagreeing with him and having a different approach to dominance than his. He knows who he is and he doesn’t need to justify himself to anybody.

11. He doesn’t take liberties. He will not boss around a person just because she’s submissive. Nor will he grope her either. He will be clear, transparent and specific about how he wants to play, before anything happens. He will not take advantage of someone being in subspace and therefore more vulnerable. He is polite to waiters, clerks and those in serving professions.

12. He’s trustworthy. He has a strong sense of integrity, responsibility and compassion. He will stick to his agreements and fulfil his end of the bargain. He will tell the truth and behave with honesty, even if that means he loses out. He’s honourable and his word is his bond.

(source: Fetlife/DominantMan78)

—-

more articles in the Library For Kinksters.

[flr-reading]

Femdom experiences, ideas, and suggestions

I’d like to share some experience, ideas, and tips I’ve put together after about 4 years of dominating my BF. This is all my personal experience, so it won’t apply to everyone.

Firstly, I need to share that we aren’t in a 24/7 Domme-sub relationship. That doesn’t interest me or my BF. My BF came to me about 4 ½ years ago and confessed some of his desires for femdom sex, and I decided to entertain it with him. It’s been a lot of fun, but I’m not making it a “lifestyle”, although we do have some “extended” sessions, which I’ll detail later in this post. Its something we do for fun in the bedroom (well, not always in the bedroom). We still have frequent “vanilla” sex, he’s actually quite good at it. :) That being said, I’m not here to pass judgement on anyone else, or pretend to be an expert on the subject of BDSM. My current BF is the only person I’ve played with like this, but we’ve learned a lot about femdom by experimenting, reading, and talking to each other. A good portion of these ideas and suggestions were his idea, and many are mine. Some may think that this is topping from the bottom, but I don’t take it too seriously. This is all just in good fun for us.

Also, even though I talk about some of the stuff below being “forced”, that’s not to imply he hasn’t consented. We always have a safeword, and we discuss generalities before we decide on trying something new (although I do definitely surprise him with new activities to push his limits). Also, keep safety in mind with any activity. Not all of this is safe for every couple or every person. So, with all that out of the way, lets get to it!

I approach femdom by classifying activities into 4 categories, then I put them together for an experience. The categories I use are: Degradation/Humiliation, Pain and Control, Frustration/Teasing, and Service. I’ll go over activities in each then describe how I put them together.

DEGRADATION/HUMILIATION 

This is a very fun category and can include a lot of different things. Here’s a list of activities that I enjoy inflicting on him.

Forced feminization - I frequently make him wear women’s clothing during our sessions. This can include lots of different outfits. Feel free to mix and match to your taste. Amazon is great for getting lingerie on a budget. I like to go with really girly colors and patterns for my guy. My favorites are:

High heels. These are an absolute necessity. You don’t need to spend a lot of money on these, but you might want more than one pair if you insist his outfits match.

Lingerie. This can include teddies, stockings, babydoll, fishnet dresses, etc.

Just a pair of panties. This makes him feel very exposed. I like ones that ride up his little butt (cheekies, thongs), but still cover his entire penis. Don’t let him wear anything else.

Pasties. This is very, very fun. Pasties are cheap, and not something you ever see a man wearing. A pair of high heels, pink thong, and some pasties is great outfit for him to wear while he cleans the bathroom for you.

Schoolgirl outfit. This is a classic, and can lead to some incredible role-playing situations. The skirt should be short enough you can see his little white panties peeking out without even bending over.

French Maid. Another classic, useful for the Service category I’ll go into later.

Makeup. This is a favorite activity. I love giving him a makeover. Super slutty makeup is the best and can be combined with any outfit.

Tight jeans, yoga pants, leggings. Pair these with a skin tight top and you’ve got a great outfit for lounging around the house.

Short shorts. These can be cut off jean type shorts, yoga style shorts, or anything you like. The shorter the better.

Corset. Use this to give him a girlish figure!

Women’s bodystocking. These are hilarious. They come in all kinds of patterns and colors, and are really cheap.

Halloween costumes. Great for any time of year! Amazon has cheap playboy bunny outfits, tinkerbell costumes, sexy nurse, etc. There are so many to choose from!

Pegging/dildo play - This falls into the pain category as well depending on your mood. I really feel that in order to make this act as degrading as possible, its important to get a dildo that looks and feels like a real penis. It should have balls and be a realistic skin tone. It should also be at least slightly bigger than his own penis (within reason). A big aspect that makes pegging so humiliating is the mental side to it. Obviously, there’s some physical to it as well, but just being forced to “deal” with a dick is mortifying to most straight men. Some activities involving your strapon or dildo:

Deepthroat training. Let’s eliminate that gag reflex ladies! Seriously one of the most degrading things you can do to your man is fucking his face. I like to recreate positions from porn in this activity. Relax on the couch or chair while wearing your strapon. Put him on his knees and make him get to work. If he’s not going deep enough grab his hair and force his face down on that dick! Trust me, he can take it. Don’t be gentle. Make sure he maintains eye contact like a good little porn star! I also like to have him lay on his back on the bed or couch, with his head hanging over the side and cram my dick down his throat. Do this until he gags, over and over, he’ll be drooling all over himself soon enough. Have him lie down on his back, then straddle his upper chest/neck area so the only thing you can see is his face. Put your dildo in his mouth and jackhammer that thing down his throat. Don’t be scared of hurting him, even if your dildo is on the large side of realistic. he’ll eventually be able to take it balls deep. He might complain that it doesn’t fit. Well, its your job to MAKE it fit. Yes he’s going to cough and gag, a lot, yes he’s going to have a lot of drool and mucus coming out of his mouth. That’s OK. Don’t be deterred by any sounds, drool, or complaints. Also give him instructions and compliments when appropriate (“yeah, show me your tongue” “hands behind your back and open wide bitch” “give me that throat” “that’s a good little cocksucker”)

EDIT: I’ve received several questions about this point. I’ll clarify exactly what were doing here and why. When I make him suck my dildo, I’m not getting any physical pleasure out of it and neither is he. This is not meant to be physically pleasurable to us, it’s meant to make him feel like my bitch. When you do this, make it an ordeal he needs to suffer through. When he’s on his knees in front of you, fuck his mouth hard and fast. Really make an effort to get your entire dildo down his throat as you thrust in and out. Make him suffer here for quite some time, 5, 10, 15 minutes even. Don’t let him get away with pulling his head away or anything either. Make him keep your dick in his mouth, see how long you can keep it buried balls deep in his mouth, lock your legs around his head if necessary. His jaw and throat should be very sore after this ordeal, and his face should be a mess of slobber and spit. Once he can take your whole dildo down his throat without gagging, its time to upgrade to something longer and/or thicker. Your goal should be to have him performing at THIS LEVEL and he won’t get there without proper training.

Butt fucking. Work up to this using your fingers, plugs (he should wear a large sized one for a while before a pegging session), and other toys, but eventually your goal should be forceful pounding. Make him feel what its like to really get fucked. While pegging him, yank his hair, push his face down into the bed or floor, slap his ass. Be creative with positions and locations. One of my favorites is the tile kitchen floor, he doesn’t have to be comfortable while getting fucked. Use lots and lots of lube here, it makes getting your dick in a lot easier on both of you.

Dildo masturbation. Make him suck and fuck himself with a dildo or other toys for your amusement. This one can be done with very minimal effort on your part. Just give him a toy, order him to the corner, and tell him to get it up his ass.

Using other objects to fuck him with. This can be a lot of fun, but be careful. Some items I’ve fucked him with: Beer bottle, drumsticks, vodka bottle,

Forced Nudity - This one is simple, but you can spice it up with toys if you like. Simply order him to be naked while you remain clothed. If you like, make him wear a butt plug that you can smack and wiggle around while he gets you a drink. Put a collar on him if you want, or combine this with forced feminization from above (for example make him wear only high heels, lipstick, and a chastity cage for the evening). Sometimes its fun to combine this with pegging. I’ll strap my dick on over my jeans, while he’s completely naked. Its a very humbling experience for him. I also frequently have him sleep naked.

Forced Performances. This is very entertaining and again a low-effort humiliation. Sometimes I like to put on some music and have him dance for me. I’ll make him perform a little strip tease, twerk, etc. Sometimes I will have him masturbate for me. I’ll give directions. (these are great times for video recording)

Spitting. We’re getting a little more extreme here. Don’t be afraid to spit on your male. This can be especially degrading during pegging, even more so during deepthroat training. While he’s making eye contact, just launch a huge wad of spit right in his face. He’ll love you for it! It can also be degrading while you’re criticizing his performance to spit in his face.

Golden showers. We haven’t worked our way up to here yet, and to be honest, I don’t know if I want to. Something we have tried in this area though, making him lick me clean after I take a piss.

Verbal humiliation (Disclaimer: Talk to your partner about this first if you’re worried about crossing a line with him, because this can be emotionally charged.) I really like this, and to me, there are two components. 1. You degrading him with words. 2. Making him degrade himself with words.

You degrading him.

Name calling. Call him degrading names. This can include the following: Bitch, sissy, cunt, slut, whore, piece of shit, stupid, worthless.

Penis humiliation/emasculation. This is common on femdom porn sites. Make fun of the size of his dick, his sexual ability, the things he lets you do to him, etc. Terms like shrimp-dick, bitch boy, butt boy, fuck-hole, cum eater, cum dumpster, cocksucker, limp dick. etc.

Combine insults. Example: “You’re a little limp dick cocksucker.” “You’re a little cum eating bitch, aren’t you?”

Being forceful and insulting with your directions. Example: Instead of saying “get on your knees and suck my dick”, say “Get on your fucking knees and get this dick down your throat you little bitch.” Instead of using his name and telling him to bend over the kitchen table for his pegging, say something like, “Hey shrimp-dick! Get in here, bend over the table and get fucked.” Instead of saying come here and lick my pussy say “get over here and make me cum you little piece of shit”.

Tell him what you’re going to do to him later. Send him a text letting him know you’re going to make him eat your pussy and send him away hard and frustrated.

Order him to do things for you. *MOST IMPORTANTLY: Don’t be afraid to raise your voice, or even yell. Its encouraged in this situation that you will be very forceful with your voice. Yell in his face if he isn’t licking your pussy correctly. Yell in his face after you cum and tell him to get the fuck off the bed and do the dishes.

Making him degrade himself. This can be really fun.

Make him beg. Use this for anything, make him beg to fuck you, beg you to peg him, beg you to let him masturbate, beg you to let him eat his cum, beg you to spank him, etc. It doesn’t even have to be something he wants. The key to this though, is to make sure his begging meets your standards. If you don’t believe he really wants it, punish him and make him try again, and again until you really believe him.

Make him apologize. Maybe the orgasm he gave you was mediocre. Maybe he didn’t take your dildo up his ass with enough enthusiasm. Maybe when you told him to deepthroat your strapon, he couldn’t get his nose to touch your stomach like you insisted. He should be punished for such infractions, but he should also tell you how sorry he is first. (maybe after his punishment too.) Make sure he apologizes sincerely for any shortcomings. Shit, sometimes I make him apologize for having a small dick (even though he doesn’t).

Make him thank you. Did you let him have an orgasm? Did you fuck his little butthole really well? Did you let him lick your asshole? He needs to thank you for the privlege.

Make him confess. Make him tell you his fantasies. This works especially well if you have him on the edge of orgasm. Make him confess a deep, dark fantasy that he’s never told anyone before. (He’ll probably run out of ideas at some point, you can punish him for that)

Public Play. There are some really fun ways you can take this play out of the house for some really great humiliation that doesn’t involve violating other people boundaries.

Clothes shopping. I enjoy taking him to stores, wal-mart, target, etc. and picking out some really girly panties and outfits for him to wear. If there isn’t anyone around, I’ll occasionally make him go try them on in the dressing room.

Wearing plugs or other toys in public.

And finally, for one of the most humiliating things a man can ever do……

Swallowing cum and/or getting a facial. He fucking hates this, which is why I love it. Any time he has an orgasm during any femdom activity, he’s eating it or its going on his face. I don’t care where it lands, how he came, if it was an accident, or if he really doesn’t want to. That cum is going in his mouth and down his throat. There are a lot of ways to accomplish this, but I really enjoy planning ahead for it. Its also a huge turn on for him, knowing that he’s going to be forced to eat it, even though immediately after he cums he’s absolutely repulsed by it. Some of my favorite ways to do this are:

Make him cum into a condom, then empty it into his mouth.

Make him have a ruined orgasm (I’ll explain later) onto the tile or hardwood floor. Then make him lick it up. If he resists, shove his face in it. If you have carpet, that isn’t a problem. Make him suck the cum out of it until its all gone.

If you let him cum inside you or on you, make him suck the cum out of you or lick it off of you.

While he’s wearing a pair of panties, rub his dick until he cums in them. Then peel them off and make him lick it out, or smear them all over his face.

Flip his legs over his head into the piledriver position (good for pegging also) and make him shoot his load all over his own face. This is a favorite of mine, simply because of the role reversal mind fuck going on in his head. I also like making him leave the jizz on his face for the rest of the day.

Make him cum into a glass and then pour it into his mouth, or pour it all over his face and/or hair.

However he gets the cum into his mouth, occasionally I’ll have him “play” with it. Gargle it, show it to me on his tongue, drool it out and then suck it back up like a porn star.

EDIT: Ladies, he’s going to be much more compliant with eating his semen if he has had a ruined orgasm instead of a pleasurable one. I mention this below but I’ll go into some more detail here. When your man has an orgasm his sexual desire drops off a cliff. He won’t want to eat his cum and will resist. But if you give him a ruined orgasm, he doesn’t get much pleasure at all, and his sexual desire remains high, but he still can expel a good amount of sperm. The goal here is to make his semen come out of his dick without pleasure, but for most men, the pleasure and orgasm actually begins several seconds before he ejaculates. So I like to have fun with this. With him on his knees and his hands restrained I’ll stroke his dick until he gets very close to orgasm, and then when I think hes right on the edge, I’ll let go and watch. I’ll wait about 20 seconds and if no semen comes out, start again. If you’ve done this perfectly, his semen will leak out about 10-15 seconds AFTER you stopped stroking it. He’ll be left sexually frustrated, but you actually DID give him an orgasm, its not your fault he didn’t feel it! He’ll be much more compliant in regards to consuming semen in this way. I like to combine this with chastity sometimes too. I’ll have him locked in the cage for a few days, give him a ruined orgasm and then put him back in. Its wonderful!

ADDED HUMILIATION BONUS!

For added humiliation, I frequently take pictures and video of my pet during these humiliating sessions. I keep these and then use them later for addiitonal humiliaiton. Seriously, having a video of him, with his face covered in his own semen, apologizing for not deepthroating my strapon well enough, all while dressed in daisy dukes and a bikini top….well that’s just good entertainment. Sometimes I make him watch some of the videos with me and laugh at him. It always results in a giant erection in his pants, haha.

PAIN AND CONTROL

DISCLAIMER: It seems online, many people are nervous about this category, and with good reason. Its sometimes hard to tell what your partner is comfortable with, and they may not even be sure of it themselves. So take all of this slowly at first until you and your partner can figure out what works for you. That being said, I seek to push right up against my boyfriend’s limits here. This is where the “forced” part of the humiliation listed above becomes more real.

There are several ways to inflict some pain on your male, here are some of my favorites.

Face slapping. I really enjoy this. Nothing gets his attention so quickly as a pop to the side of his cheek. Several (5-6) in quick succession create a look of fear in his face that I love. He can take a lot of punishment here too, just watch out for his eyes and ears. This is an especially good thing to practice while you’re fucking his face or he’s licking your pussy and/or ass. Use your slaps to get his attention, give direction, and have fun. “I slap told slap you slap to slapfocus slap on slap my slap clit!! slap”

Hair Pulling. Grab his hair and yank his head around. Do this while pegging (in any position), while he’s giving you oral (or sucking your dildo), to lead him where you want him, to hold his head in place while you slap him, to force his face into a puddle of semen, etc.

Spanking/whipping. The most common. I like to use a belt, flogger, occasionally a cane.

Cock and Ball Torture. Another common theme on femdom websites. Here’s a list of techniques I use.

Squeezing/Pinching. Grab his balls and squeeze. Pinch the head of his dick.

Slapping. Simple. To make it hurt worse, you can grab his balls into one hand and hold them tight and steady while you slap.

Punching. Same as above but creates a lot more pain. :)

Kicking. Kicking him right in the balls after you just fucked his ass can be quite the experience for both of you. Take this one more slowly haha.

Nipple Play. Most people know about this already. Use clamps, clothespins, pinches, flicks, twists, and scrapes to inflict some pain here. He can take more than you think.

Chemical Play. Ok, we’re getting to some more extreme areas here again. This is not to be taken lightly, as many people’s bodies react differently. Here’s a list of things we’ve tried.

Ice cubes. Rub on his penis, balls, asshole, and nipples. This can sometimes eliminate a pesky erection in a pinch. I’ve inserted cubes into his anus as well, he doesn’t like that lol.

Ben-gay/Icy Hot. Rub this on the penis balls, taint, and anus. This creates a very unpleasant burning sensation. My pet feels very intense pain for about 10-20 minutes. It then subsides to a mild cooling sensation.

Tabasco/hot sauce. Same as above, rub on genitals and asshole. Your man’s experience will vary here depending on the type of sauce you use, the duration you leave it on, and the amount you use. I reserve this for serious punishment. I once poured some hot sauce on the dildo I fucked him with. Let’s just say he didn’t have a great night.

Electricity. You need to be even more careful here. My only experience is a dog shock collar. I attach the collar around his penis and testicles. It has a vibrate function (for when he’s been a good boy) and 8 levels of shocks. We’ve gotten up to level 6. He really hopes I don’t have to use 7 or 8 on him. You can experiment with the position of the collar on his genitals. If the contacts are touching his balls, he’ll feel it throughout his sack and his perineum. If you flip it over and the contacts touch the base of his penis, shocking sensations will affect his entire penis, all the way to the head. We’ve experimented with different levels here, and it seems his penis is much more sensitive to electricity than his balls are. Your man’s experience may vary. This collar also has a sound/beeping function that I use as a pager when I need him. If his balls beep, he has 10 seconds to be on his knees in front of me, regardless of his prior activity, or else he’ll face punishment.

Bondage and Restraints. I keep this simple as I don’t enjoy taking the time to set up intricate bondage situations. I’m sure my BF would like it, but its just too much effort when I can use simpler items to accomplish the same things. I own a few types of gags, a collar and leash, handcuffs, bed restraint system and, my favorite, a spreader bar (bar with cuffs for hands and feet).

Control. A lot of the more severe pain and control items above are essentially just a method to get my guy to do what he’s told. This is where the “forced” aspect really comes into play. For example, he absolutely hates eating sperm. But if I want him to eat sperm, he’s going to fucking eat it. So I use pain to get him to do it. One way I do this is with the electric dog collar and handcuffs. After he cums, and there’s a load of sperm sitting there on the floor, I give him a choice. Either put your face on it and suck up all that lovely sperm, or, get shocked in increasing intervals and strength. Eventually he’ll do it. This is an area where we’ve both agreed that he doesn’t get a choice any longer. He submits to being forced to lick his jizz off the floor.

Another example is dildo play. If i instruct him to deepthroat my strapon, and get the entire 7 inches down his throat while maintaining eye contact, that’s his job to do. If he doesn’t, I inflict pain. For example, I might start by slapping his face as a warning if he’s disobeying, increasing the strength and quantity of the slaps as I try to work the dildo down his throat. If that doesn’t work, I move on to other means. I may whip him with the belt, or punch his balls a few times then give him another chance. I increase the pain until he obeys. Its really fun to give him tasks that are hard to acheive. I also use pain as punsihment for failure. If he can’t make me orgasm in a certain time period, or its less pleasurable than what I expected, I may attach the spreader bar to his ankles and wrists, gag him, slather his cock and balls with ben-gay, and then go have a glass of wine while he contemplates how he can improve his performance next time.

This doesn’t mean I need a reason to hurt my toy. When we’re playing, I may slap him for fun or for no reason at all. If he’s getting pegged, he should expect to get popped in the face a few times just because I fucking feel like it. Maybe I’ll kick his little blue balls afterwards while he’s still on all fours on the kitchen floor, just because I want to be a bitch.

FRUSTRATION/TEASING

This is really quite simple. When we’re playing, I cum when I want, he cums when he’s allowed to. I enjoy making him suffer in this way, its honestly the most fun part of all this. There are a lot of ways I enjoy teasing and frustrating him and I’ll go over some of them now. There is one hard and fast rule in this game for us. He must always ask permission to ejaculate, no exceptions. He’ll be punished severely for an unauthorized orgasm or ejaculation.

Chastity. This is a must for us. While we don’t play 24/7, I enjoy making him wear a chastity device frequently when we’re apart. I work nights, so if I’m at work, chances are he’s locked into “The Vice”. This is a locking chastity cage, similar to others, only this one has an anti-pullout mechanism that makes it very difficult to remove without the key. Basically “The Vice” (available at  www.lockedinlust.com ) is a plastic sheath for his dick that attaches to a ring around the base of his balls. It prevents erections and masturbation very well for the price. I don’t want my man’s dick mangled by a piercing for this game we play, and some of the other devices out there require that to be secure. The Vice keeps it secure and out of his (or anyone else’s) hands. Its so empowering to be able to restrict access to his own dick. I have the power to grant him erections and orgasms, he can’t have them without me or my approval. The length of time he wears the device really changes, but is up to me. I usually don’t keep him in it for more than a couple days, but we’ve had times that I left him in there for over 3 weeks. He really wasn’t happy about the time I had to leave town for 4 days and took the key with me, AFTER he’d been locked up for a week already.

There are a log of fun chastity games you can find online. Some fun chastity games we play:

Try to cum. I enjoy leaving the device on him, and tell him to try to have an orgasm with it on (no vibrator allowed!). Its fucking entertaining to see him hump his hand, finger his asshole, shake the cage around, pinch his own nipples, etc. I like to offer some cheering words of encouragement here for him. Usually I have him do this on the floor in the middle of the living room while I sit on the couch and watch. He hasn’t been able to cum yet, but maybe one day he’ll get there. (Another great video opportunity)

Coin flip. If he’s been locked up for several days, I’ll strap him to the bed or handcuff him to remove the device. Then I’ll start stroking his dick until he’s very close to orgasm, right on the edge. Then I flip a coin, heads I finish him off. Tails, I immediately stop, put an ice pack on his dick and lock him back up once he’s soft again. Better luck next time honey.

Roll of the dice. If he rolls a six, he gets to cum. If not, that’s the number of days he stays locked up until he gets another chance. This went on for over 3 weeks for us at one point. He was really on edge lol.

Chastity can also play into the control aspect as well. Sometimes when we play I don’t take the cage off. For example, he doesn’t need an erection to get fucked in his ass or to use my dildo and vibrator on my pussy, so why take it off? If he starts giving me a bad attitude, I’ll simply add another day or two to his lockup time. I use this as punishment for disobedience when playing, so it gives me more control.

One of the big things you’ll notice if you start incorporating chastity into your sex life, is that he will become more and more agreeable and obedient as time goes on, if you restrict his orgasms. If we’re playing with chastity more seriously, I like to make him wait 1 to 2 weeks between orgasms. He has a high sex drive, so when I do this, he gets so horny he’ll do anything to get out of his chastity cage. Its really entertaining to see what I can get him to do. Once, after 13 days locked into the Vice, I insisted he detail my car if he wanted out of the device. He whined and complained, so I told him that he just earned himself another 3 days in the device, and I still expected the car detailed.

The MOST IMPORTANT thing when incorporating chastity into your sex life is this. SAY NO. Don’t be swayed by his begging, whining, or complaining. Firstly lets get this out of the way, no one NEEDS to have an orgasm. He wants to cum, he doesn’t need to. So lets get that little idea out of the way immediately. We have a rule, when he’s locked up, he gets to politely ask for an orgasm once per day. If I feel like it, I’ll have him earnestly beg me. This is great for extracting promises from him. But if I say no, he needs to shut the fuck up about it immediately. Occasionally I’ll say yes, but most of the time I’ll say no as I’ve already decided on how long he’s going to be locked up. Do not feel bad about this. In fact, relish your power here.

I get off on having him go down on me right after I tell him “No, you’re staying locked up.” While we both agreed to incorporate chastity devices into our sex life, the lockup duration is my decision alone. Use the device to modify his behavior to your liking. If you want something from him, sexual or not, give him the order. If he doesn’t comply, add time in the device. The power is intoxicating.

Teasing. Sometimes he wears The Vice around the house, sometimes not. But regardless I like to wear skimpy clothing, rub up against him, feel and squeeze his balls, ass cheeks, and body just to see him get a boner (or try to, hehe). I’ll take this a lot further sometimes, stroking his dick until he starts leaking precum, getting him close to orgasm, only to stop and tell him to calm down. Sometimes I even let him fuck me until I have an orgasm or two, then tell him to stop. This is delightfully frustrating for him. Other times I’ll leave him in the chastity cage and masturbate right in front of him. One of my favorite teases is to use his mouth to make me cum and send him away completely denied. Sometimes I tell him I’m going to make him cum, only to stop at the last second and tell him I changed my mind.

Ruined Orgasm. By far the funniest aspect to this whole femdom thing. Its really an artform. The basic idea is that you get your man very, very close to the point of orgasm and then stop all stimulation. If you do it right, he’ll just tip over the edge, and his semen will dribble out of his dick with barely any force, and next to no pleasure. This works best with his hands restrained so he can’t try to finish the job himself. I like to pair this sometimes with the shock collar to make it completely miserable.

SERVICE

So now we get to the fun part. A lot of the above is playing into my man’s fetish, and that’s ok. I do love him, and I don’t have a problem doing stuff for his enjoyment. But you can be sure I’m going to be getting something out of all this! A big part of femdom is serving the woman in the relationship. And I’ll detail how that all works for us now.

Sexual Service. This encompasses everything. If I want my ass eaten out for 2 hours while I watch TV, he does it. If I want a full body massage from a muscled, naked man, that’s what I get. If I want to fuck and get off two or three times, I get that. If I want my nipples sucked while I use my vibrator on myself, that’s what I get. Nothing is off limits to me sexually. I speak, he obeys. That’s just how it goes. I typically don’t orgasm from oral sex alone or penetrative sex alone, and sometimes it can take quite a while for me to get there. The point is, I get what I want. Not that I want him eating my ass for 2 hours necessarily, but I’ll make him do something like that sometimes just because I can. (Then sometimes make fun of him for it.)

Facesitting. I love sitting on his face. Its a great experience to cum all over his face. Sometimes I use just his tongue, while other times I’ll shove a dildo in his mouth and ride it while using my vibrator. I also have a gag that has a dildo sticking out of it. Whatever I’m using, its important that I’m only concerned with my own pleasure during this experience. Don’t worry about whether or not he’s able to breathe, if his tongue is tired, if his neck hurts, etc. In fact, its quite enjoyable to put him in intentionally uncomfortable positions for this. We have a hard wooden chair that I like to use for this. He’ll be required to sit on the floor and lean his head back onto the seat of the chair. This hurts his neck and head when I really start riding and bouncing on it, but who gives a fuck? He needs to focus on my orgasm, not his temporary discomfort.

As part of the sexual service aspect of femdom in our sex life, we’ve decided that he no longer decides when and where he gets to orgasm, when and where I get to orgasm, and he doesn’t decide on when or where any other sexual activity takes place. That’s up to me now. This doesn’t mean that he doesn’t initiate sex any longer, far from it. But it does mean he doesn’t get to complain, and he doesn’t get to turn me down when I want it either.

The goal of sexual service is two-fold. One, for you to get all the pleasure you want. Two, for him to feel completely objectified. When you are using him sexually, think of him as just another sex toy, a dildo that you can use up and throw away when you are finished.

But this isn’t limited to sexual service only.

Domestic Service. Basics. When we’re in femdom mode, he does the chores. All of them. We get to spice up mundane things like cleaning the bathroom and vacuuming in easy ways. For example, if the dishes need washed, and the kitchen mopped, I tell my bitch to get his maid outfit and shock collar on and bring me the large butt plug. While he gets dressed I may watch TV, text friends, do some shopping online, or anything else I want. When he’s ready, he lubes up the plug and I put it up his tight little ass. He then goes off to do whatever I’ve told him to do while I relax. After he’s done I may or may not inspect his work, if he did a good job then he may get a reward. His reward may be the privilege of kissing my asshole for example. If its not up to par he may get punished. This can be implemented immediately, or added to a play session later. If you are going to go this route though, I would suggest using punishments he really wants to avoid (extended chastity time, severe spankings, etc.) or else you may find him purposefully messing up in order to get some “punishment” he wants.

This applies to any chore we need completed. My laundry, dishes, car washes, lawn mowing (its funny seeing him on a riding mower when I know there’s a plug up his ass), cooking, etc.

Personal Service. These are generally intimate things that I want done for me. They can really play up the tease element as well. Some examples: 

Shave me. In the shower or bath, I like to have him shave my legs and pussy.

Toenails/pedicure. I pick the color, then he massages, moisturizes my feet. Then polishes my nails for me. He’s also responsible for removing any old polish from my nails. 

Massage. Sometimes just a shoulder rub, other times I’ll be nude and he is required to give me a full body massage with oil. I like for him to be nude for this as well. It’s really torture for him to give me a few orgasms afterwards and stay denied. 

Body worship. It can be really relaxing to have him kiss and nuzzle my thighs, feet nipples, and pussy. I especially enjoy having my asshole worshiped though. Just light kisses, licks and nuzzles. Basically he’s making out with my asshole. It’s a serious power trip to have him do this while I watch TV or play games on my phone, ignoring him except to give instructions if I want something done differently.

PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER

I’ve outlined several ideas and topics here, and now I’ll give an example on how I’ve put all of it together. Remember when reading this, its all in fun, and it doesn’t necessarily have to make a lot of sense. Remember, if your guy is into femdom, he likes a lot of this kind of stuff already.

I like to choose something from each category when we play, just to round out the session. Not always, but frequently.

For one session I decided we were going to do some pegging, so before I got home I told him to get himself cleaned up, naked, and get a plug in. I got home about an hour later, so he’d been stretched out for a little while. I got home, grabbed him by the hair and dragged him into the garage. I told him to get on all fours in the middle of the floor and wait. He waited there for 20 minutes. I know he was scared, he’d never been fucked on the garage floor before. It wasn’t clean, and he was completely naked except for the plug in his ass.

I came in turned all the lights on and started taking pictures. I was already wearing the strapon. I made him smile for the camera, and pose for me. It looked like a really trashy photoshoot. I took several pictures in varioius positions and then I told him it was time to get busy.

I lubed up my cock, slowly pulled out the plug and got to work. I fucked him on the floor of the garage for about 5 minutes, eventually really pounding him. I pulled him up by his hair, bent him over the hood of my car and pounded some more. I insisted he fake an orgasm like a girl. It was reallly funny listening him attempt to moan and scream like a woman orgasming.

Once he was done, I pulled him around by the hair and spit directly into his face. I told him that was the worst fuck I’d ever had and told him to “go clean my fucking bathroom”. He stared at me dumbfounded, so I slapped him hard in his face and repeated it louder. He quickly scurried off to the master bath. About 5 minutes later I came in and threw the strapon and butt plug on the floor and told him to clean up my toys as well. When he came and reported that he was done, I went to inspect his work. It was spotless.

So I told him to get himself cleaned up and ready for bed. As a reward I let him go down on me for a while and then use my vibrator to give me an orgasm. He didn’t get to cum that night. (but we did cuddle and watch a movie)

There are many more ways you can mix and match categories, and many of them run together. For example, you can facefuck your man with your strapon, while you rub his dick. Once you’re satisfied he’s learned how to deepthroat, pull him off and make him beg for the privilege of masturbating in your presence. You can record this on video if you like, then, make him eat his own cum on video. The possibilities are endless! Again, I know a lot of this isn’t “authentic” if you’re doing it for your submissive partner, but that doesn’t really matter to me. What matters is that we’re having fun, and I get what I need out of it too.

Amazing add from one or the subscribers! Thanks for that!

[slut-to-be-use]

Maybe not everything but most if this is arousing

[beautifulsecrets42]

Let’s talk FLR...

From the MaleChastityLifestyle website,

Nine times out of ten, or maybe 99 times out of 100, it is the man who brings up the idea of male chastity and his fantasy of being denied.

The woman’s reaction will vary…. from complete disgust…. to obvious disinterest…. maybe mild curiosity…. all the way to emphatic embracement.

No wonder it can be nerve wracking for a guy to broach the subject of male chastity to his partner.

Her reaction will make or break his day!

Keep in mind that he would not have brought it up if it wasn’t important to him, so it’s a good idea for the woman to keep her wits (if she possibly can!) and carefully consider her initial reaction.

The smart approach is to calm down, collect her feelings and then suggest a time for a lengthy sit-down discussion.

A short ‘on-the-spot’ superficial little chat will not do the subject of male chastity proper justice!

Scheduling the discussion for later will buy her some time to not only reflect on his desires, but allow some time to do some preliminary research into male chastity, so she has a better idea as to what she’s dealing with.

During the sit-down discussion, it’s best to let him do most of the talking while she encourages him to bare his deepest and darkest secrets.

Listening and asking questions will give her some valuable insights into what is actually going on here.

Her final question to him should be….

What’s in it for ME…

She should listen to his answer very carefully as it will help her out later.

Time For Some R&R

No, not rest and relaxation. If you’re a woman that chooses to embrace a male chastity lifestyle, there will be plenty of opportunity for that later on.

R&R in this case stands for ‘research’ and ‘reflection’.

This 2nd step to living a male chastity lifestyle is all about the woman doing her due diligence, rolling up her sexy silk sleeves, and doing some research as to what makes her man ‘tick’.

The more she can get inside his head and find out what he really wants and needs, the better this lifestyle will work for both them.

A little investigation into the mind of the man who craves being put into a chastity device and denied will reveal something very important to the woman.

She needs to realize that if she doesn’t have a mean streak in her now, it will serve her (and him) well to allow the cruel side of herself to blossom.

In order to deal with all of the bullshit that will soon be coming forth from him, it will be mandatory for her to be (at times), tough minded, mean and yes….

…. even somewhat of a bitch.

While her research will enlighten her to all of his male chastity fantasies, she will need to adopt a tough-minded attitude in order to effectively use those fantasies to her benefit.

Now for the 2nd part of the R&R…. reflection.

It’s time for her to reflect on his answers to What’s in it for ME…

He undoubtedly gave her some excellent ideas as to what she will get out of the tedious task of training him to be locked away in male chastity.

But his ideas are just a start. What about her deepest and darkest desires?

How will she benefit from this arrangement?

She should take some serious time to reflect on this as it will come in handy soon.

She Makes the Rules!

Now we’re getting to the fun part…. where she gets to make up the rules.

Okay…. You’ve had your sit-down with each other.

She’s finished with her research assignment.

Now it’s time to make up the rules as to how you’re going to play the male chastity game.

Although he’s got plenty of ideas of his own for ‘rules’ as to how he would like all of this to play out, in order for a male chastity lifestyle to work seamlessly over the long term….

…. there can really only be one rule-maker… HER

It’s just the best way to make this male chastity thing work.

In coming up with a set of rules, she will of course take into consideration his male chastity fantasies that he revealed to her during their initial discussion.

She will also factor in the information she uncovered during the research phase.

The reflection time she spent on sorting out her fantasies and desires will also play a major part in making up an appropriate set of rules.

But the first rule of male chastity and the most important is this one….

Every subsequent rule made by her is to be followed explicitly and directly by him with absolutely no questions asked or allowed…

If he can’t deal with this over-riding theme of Female Supremacy, FemDom, FLR, D/s, Female Keyholder or whatever you prefer to call it, then she simply refuses to be involved any further and expects no further mention by him of male chastity.

It’s imperative that she holds all of the cards for this game to work.

There can be absolutely no exceptions, wiggle room, backsliding, second-guessing or topping from the bottom.

None of that bullshit!

This one rule firmly and succinctly sets the tone and direction for a fulfilling, fun and exciting male chastity experience.

From then on, she makes as many or as few rules as she wants. She can add, delete, change or modify any rule, anytime at her whim…. with no prior notice.

If she’s in a benevolent mood, she can even entertain suggestions from him as to the nature of the rules.

This predominant position puts her in a place of prodigious power.

And this level of power will pay off in big benefits.

Time For Lockdown Mode…

There are many factors you should consider when looking to buy a male chastity device.

» Type: chastity cage or belt? » Material: plastic, leather or metal? » Security: used with a piercing or without » Custom made to order or off the shelf? » Price? » Manufacturer: reliable customer support

Let’s go over these considerations, one-by-one.

If this will be your first chastity device, it’s best to stick with a cage type. Chastity belts are very secure and look sexy but they do have their drawbacks.

They are usually custom made so will take longer to receive, plus they are on the expensive side. A chastity belt can also be harder to hide under certain types of clothing.

As far as material, leather looks sexy but is not very secure (it can be cut easily) and is not particularly hygienic.

Metal is definitely sexy looking and usually quite secure. But devices made from metal are obviously heavier, harder to get used to, and pose a problem with airport security.

Plastic is the way to go when first starting out.

Most chastity cages, whether made from metal or plastic are pretty damn secure! Although there are men who can finagle their way out of them, my experience has been that when properly fitted, they won’t be coming off without a key.

For added security, many modern chastity devices can be used with or without a penis piercing.

Custom made chastity cages are typically of the belt variety or made from metal. Like I mentioned above, they are usually expensive and can take quite a while to receive. Also, initial measurements are critical to achieve a good fit.

Off the shelf chastity devices come with different sizes of rings and spacers that will ensure a good fit. It is usually necessary to experiment with different combinations of spacers and rings to come up with a comfortable fitting device.

As far as price goes, an off the shelf, plastic chastity cage such as the very popular CB-6000, while not cheap, is well within the budget of most.

You can find cheaper, Chinese knock-offs on Amazon but the quality is not to be trusted…. they crack and break a lot.

On the other hand, custom chastity devices can get quite expensive and are best left for when your chastity lifestyle has been allowed to season a bit.

Male chastity is becoming more popular all the time which brings more designers and manufactures into the arena with new and innovative products.

These manufacturers can come and go like the wind so it’s always wise to pick a chastity device made by  a company who has been around for awhile in case you need customer support or replacement parts and accessories.

There is a reason devices like the CB-6000 are so popular.

It’s affordable, secure, comfortable and hygienic!

Unfortunately, it’s not as simple as ordering a male chastity device, locking him up and embarking on a fun and exciting male chastity lifestyle.

There is a critical process that must be carefully navigated before the mayhem can begin.

This is what you’ve been waiting for? Your male chastity device has arrived and you cannot wait to get started.

Break him in…. Slowly but surely

Whoa boy (or girl). Take a deep breath, relax and read what I have to say on this matter.

Before wildly embarking on this male chastity adventure it’s necessary for an adjustment period….

…. a physical and emotional one. He needs to be slowly but surely, ‘broken in’.

First, take a little time and make sure you get a good fit, not too tight, not too loose, but just right.

Once that’s done, lock him up for 24 straight hours.

After a day, you’ll both have a good idea as to how things are fitting down there. A little initial discomfort along with some minor pinching is to be expected.

No big deal, at least not for the keyholder anyway.

Any major discomfort can now be dealt with at this time. A larger ring, a different sized spacer, shaving the genitals, applying lotion.

Now go for another 24 hours. If everything is hunky-dory (aside from the minor chafing, pinching, etc.) then it’s time to go for 72 continuous hours (Yes, 3 full days) in lock-down mode.

He will now be getting used to and/or moving beyond any minor discomfort.

He will soon find it more practical to sit down on the toilet and pee like a girl.

He will get used to the feeling of not being able to touch his dick.

He will begin to experience a yearning feeling deep inside his balls (as well as his mind) that comes with sexual denial.

The next phase is to remove the chastity cage, re-shave, re-lube, re-adjust rings and spacers and lock him back up for seven straight days!

This is the phase where any final physical adaptations will take place and more importantly, where the psychological process begins.

This is where the fantasy begins to morph into reality.

He now will be getting what he asked for and begins the transformation from a macho man to a compliant and devoted husband or boyfriend.

Seven continuous days of no whining, complaining or cumming marks the point when your relationship is ready to take on a new level of meaning.

It’s now time to make a very big decision!

Now that he’s adapted, both physically and mentally, to being locked up for seven straight days, he’s proven that he can ‘handle’ things.

The big decision

In order to set the proper ‘tone’ of how the relationship is to eventually evolve, a mandatory (and lengthy) lock-up and denial period will have to be agreed upon and then strictly enforced.

This ‘conditioning phase’ is necessary so that both partners are fully committed to the idea that male chastity is no longer just a fantasy or a mere game, but a lifestyle decision to be taken seriously.

This ‘lock-down’ phase should be anywhere from a month (bare minimum), to a full year. Three months seems to be the ‘sweet spot’ for most couples.

This may sound like ‘harsh’ treatment but is absolutely necessary in order to instill the proper mindset in the male.

This lengthy stretch of total denial will also empower her to be tough-minded during some tough times.

She will also use this time to thoroughly train him to sexually please her without the use of his now caged-up cock.

He will become adept at transmuting his feelings of frustration and denial into the satisfaction of providing for her needs and desires.

During this training period, it’s wise to tease him un-mercifully in conjunction with verbal humiliation and an occasional whipping session, if she’s into that.

Nothing can approach the emotional intensity of her being licked to orgasm-after-orgasm by a locked-up and denied male right after he’s being worked over with a riding crop.

At the end of the ‘conditioning phase’, she will have elevated herself to a position of complete control and power while he will have learned to happily (for the most part) take on the role of a subservient sexual slave.

At the end of this period of lock-down and denial, his input into matters will no longer be necessary.

She may ask for his thoughts, but it’s now all about her! She makes all the rules and he simply answers, “yes Dear”.

His ‘Cumming Out’ Party

He is now perfectly primed and positioned for his first release in quite some time.

It’s been soooo long since he’s experienced an orgasm. Perhaps maybe a wet dream, but that doesn’t really count now, does it?

A firm benchmark has now been established within the relationship.

He’s proven (with her help) that he can endure a long period of sexual denial, all the while attending to her ever escalating sexual desires.

Denying a man while you are free to experience sexual ecstasy is an incredible turn-on and power rush for a woman…

She, on the other hand, has become capable of maintaining a disdainful demeanor to his ‘predicament’ all the while providing him with the necessary ‘guidance’ (which can sometimes be cruel and humiliating) without flinching.

But now that he has ‘paid his penance’ and she had become sufficiently empowered, it is time for her to decide on how his future orgasms will be ‘managed’.

The first area to consider is how often he should be allowed to cum.

Most women opt for a set time interval…. but it should never be more often than every two weeks!

Once per month is better. In my experience, once every two to three months is optimal.

Some keyholder’s choose to keep their men guessing; orgasms are allowed only at her whim, and he never knows when that might be.

That sounds quite cruel but some women get off on the look on a male’s face when she leads him to believe that the time is near, only to change her mind at the very last minute.

This tactic is suitable for women who prefer to emotionally ‘break’ a man down and render him as a mere shell of his former self.

For most women, this is ‘over-the-top’ and they prefer to let their man hold onto a portion of his self-dignity so that he can still function effectively out in the ‘real’ world.

And then there are women who prefer performance based or ‘earned’ orgasms.

An ejaculation can be conditional upon completing chores, performing tasks, maintaining proper behavior standards, losing weight, hers-to-his orgasm ratios (100:1), chastity games, etc.

One important thing to remember; the time between orgasms can always be extended because of ‘bad’ behavior on his part.

Once the woman has established a fair frequency for his orgasms, she must then decide on how he will be achieving these rare ejaculations.

This is where things get incredibly fun but quite spicy and dicey.

We now know the when…. What about the how?

Now it’s time to consider how he will be cumming. This is the fun part, especially for her.

After going through the ‘conditioning phase’ he has had plenty of time away from regular intercourse. If she has a penchant for penetrative sex, a dildo or a strap-on (for him) solves that issue.

She may decide that his days of fucking are over. No big deal for her since she has the options above at her disposal.

Many women choose to deny the male the privilege of traditional intercourse as a matter of principle.

It is quite common for a woman holding the key to insist that any of his orgasms are of the humiliating variety.

I have a friend who handcuffs her husband’s hands behind his back and then just tells him to go for it.

He inevitably winds up humping the hardwood floor in the kitchen, then meekly licks up his mess afterwards.

I’ve heard of one woman who has her man hump one of her girlfriend’s legs while she hurls degrading insults his way.

Other women are particularly amused by, and have become masters of, the ruined orgasm.

One particularly cruel acquaintance of mine insists on performing an emasculating prostrate milking in front of a girlfriend, boyfriend or sometimes both.

I’ve witnessed a pro-domme at a party order a man to polish a pretty girl’s high heeled boot with his cum, followed by his tongue, while she whipped his ass from behind with a riding crop.

My favorite? Instructing him to cum on her ass followed by a thorough tongue clean up. Ummmm.

It can also be exciting to incorporate some sort of ‘dice’ or ‘spin-the-wheel’ type of game, leaving the matter of ‘if he gets to cum’ and the manner in which he does it, up to pure chance.

You’re really only limited by your kinky and perverse imagination.

Now that you’ve both settled in and become comfortable with your personalized version of a male  chastity lifestyle, it’s time to reflect on an extremely important matter.

Once everything has been set-up properly within a male chastity lifestyle, everything should now be smooth sailing.

Not So Fast

The reality of enforced male chastity typically does not measure up to the fantasy he once had about it.

The fantasy was much more erotic than the stark reality of constant denial and severely limited orgasms.

Now that he’s securely locked up, with no release on the horizon, second thoughts on this course of events begin to haunt him.

But it’s a completely different story for her!

The reality of male chastity for the woman is much more powerful and fulfilling than the initial fantasy ever was.

At first, it was about his fantasy. Now it’s all about her reality.

Now that she holds the key to his manhood and has the situation well under control, she can’t understand why she was ever hesitant to begin this in the first place.

Sure, she has had to initially expend some major time, energy and effort with all of the rule setting, conditioning, attention to detail, discipline and compliance issues. To be honest, this is no small feat and is not for a weak willed woman!

But she will have emerged from the back-end of this process with superior self-confidence and complete sexual liberation.

He, on the other hand, has relinquished his ability to orgasm, something so importantly powerful that he can’t help but wonder if he has made the right choice.

He will, at some point, inevitably began to start ‘missing’ his frequent orgasms, the ones he had become so addicted to for most of his adult life.

If she acquiesces to this inherent weakness that resides within most all males, the lifestyle that they have expended so much effort to build, will began to fold like a cheap lawn chair.

When the subject rears it’s ugly head, she will need to firmly put her high heeled foot down and say no!

There can be no going back. She is living the perfect, pampered life that she deserves while he, for maybe the first time in his life, has found some real peace, even though it’s of the frustrating variety.

If he continues to complain and have regrets about his situation (the one, by the way, he so desperately lobbied for) she has several options, including but not limited to….

» institute a policy of permanent orgasm denial » increase his chore/work load by 50%

» a severe cock caning or whipping session » make an appointment to have his penis pierced » discontinuance of all male chastity activities » threaten to leave the relationship

Any unreasonable demands on his part should be firmly countered with strict and swift consequences.

It’s really only matter of time when she will need to draw a bold line in the sand and not put up with any questioning of her authority.

Consider this to be an honest and fair representation of possible ‘fall-out’ issues when embarking on a male chastity lifestyle.

Male Chastity is not for every couple…

To successfully incorporate it within a relationship, both partners will need to have the courage to move beyond traditional sexual and romantic roles that are played out by most couples.

Social conditioning, as it pertains to relationships, is powerful stuff and can lead to feelings of guilt, fear and inadequacy where none should ever exist.

Both men and women instinctively know who they are at a ‘gut’ level. Being in tune with that inner knowledge and living your life exactly how you want, results in true happiness and freedom.

If you’re a guy who is sick and tired of being in control all of the time, then maybe it’s time to let go.

If you truly adore a woman and enjoy treating her like a Princess, elevating her pleasure above yours, then go for it.

If you’re a woman who would like to see how it feels to ‘turn the tables’ and be the one who wields the power in a relationship, why not give male chastity a try.

Freeing yourself from all household duties (or just the ones you dislike) while experiencing exquisite sexual ecstasy, precisely the way you want it, when you want it, cannot be adequately expressed in words.

A man that can provide all of that for her, and then some, will evoke emotions that will reverberate all the way down to his inner core.

Training a male to accept his new life of being denied is a fun, frustrating (at times), and extremely rewarding endeavor. You will need to get a chastity device early on in the training process.

Thanks to malechastitylifestyle

[unkns-posts]

[annerocious]

Dear Men Writers

Lesser known facts when writing women:

High heeled shoes don’t become flats if you break the heels off.

The posts of earrings aren’t sharp.

Nail polish takes a long time to dry and smudges when wet.

You can’t hold in a period like pee.

Inserting a tampon is not arousing or sexual in any way, ever.

Feel free to add your own.

[deliciouspineapple]

- Bras leave red marks on the skin under and around boobs and it is a magical experience when taken off.

- Make up can take anywhere from 5 to 25 minutes depending on how skilled you are.

- Taking hair out of a ponytail after wearing it for hours does not make it perfectly straight when it comes down.

- Hair when wet sticks to the skin it no longer flows, idiot.

-When women with long hair kiss, turn around, do anything, their hair falls in the way.

- Stockings are itchy and tear like wet paper bags.

[ivegotthetriforce]

- Pantyhose, tights, leggings, and stockings are each different. - Waxing hurts and leaves red skin for a while afterwards while shaving leaves stubble - Most can’t run in heels unless they have been VERY worn - Insecurity in appearance doesn’t mean “buy me a drink” - EVERYONE HAS DIFFERENT TASTES IN EVERYTHING

[drmistytang]

-Having large breasts sucks. It sucks beyond belief.  If a garment happens to fit your large chest, odds are it won’t fit the rest of you. Underboob sweat is real and terrible. Bending over for extended periods of time will tweak your back out. Running can be painful due to boob turbulence. Bras are hella expensive. Big breasts are not fun.

[angryschnauzer]

Putting a tampon in isnt a quick bend-poke-done kinda deal. It involves cubicle yoga, messy hands, numerous curse words as you realise it isnt in correctly and have to take it out and start again with a new one.

[cassiopeiassky]

Yes to all of this.  But also:

If her hair is in an updo, one does not simply remove a hairpin to send her hair cascading down her back.  No.  If her hair is an updo, it will take at least an hour and an extra set of hands to remove the 137 bobby pins that are holding her hair in place.  Furthermore, there’s probably a can’s worth of hairspray in there, intended to withstand category 2 hurricane winds.  There’s no cascading happening here - the best you can hope for is a misshapen nest of hair to clump and poof unattractively in the back while it still remains flat against her scalp.

[marvel-lucy]

This is one of the funniest posts I’ve seen in a while (especially if you read all the comments), but also really depressing because at 42 I still judge myself as having failed for not matching up to all these mythical stereotypes despite knowing they’re impossible

[valeria2067]

^^^This though

[musicalhell]

The odds of a woman having smoothly shaved legs and armpits are directly proportional to the amount of skin her clothing bares and/or the amount of fucks she gives at that particular moment.

GLASSES ARE NOT COSMETIC.  If we whip them off, we do not become gorgeous fashion models.  We become squinty.

[thatsnicebutimmarried]

-most women wear bras. Yes, even when they are trying to dress sexy. Because bras make boobs look perkier and rounder, which is something men apparently find sexy, so being a seductress or femme fatale is not an automatic reason for a female character to not be wearing a bra.

-a good bra will hide headlights, or at the very least drastically reduce their noticeability. A women with enough pointy nipple issues will opt for a padded or molded bra to hide them.

-women’s nipples do not automatically become hard pyramids visible through any and all layers of clothing the second they become even slightly aroused. They are not the female equivalent of boners. And even if their nipples do get hard, the bras they are almost certainly wearing (because even a goddamn succubus with big, honkin’ knockers for seducing men is gonna have those painful puppies in some kind of boob sling) should keep those pointy nipples from being visible to every other character in the scene, JIM BUTCHER. YES, EVEN LARA RAITH WOULD WEAR A BRA ONCE IN A GODDAMN WHILE.

[eldriitchmurmurs]

if you’re being tied up and tortured in a freezing underground dungeon, then you probably have more important things to pay attention to than how hard somebody’s nipples are, jim butcher

[jabberwockypie]

- Wearing a bra that doesn’t fit HURTS.  It’s not sexy to wear a bra that’s “two sizes too small”, it’d make your clothes hang oddly and you’d have a weird, uncomfortable “quad-boob” effect and your back would hurt, BEN AARONOVITCH.

[phantoms-lair]

Also, after removing a too small bra, there’s gonne be angry red lines on the boobs and ribs and the lady is not going to want them to be touched by anyone for a good long while

[everystarstorm]

-Not all women wear heels. Those things hurt and are hard to balance in. They can also mess up your feet and back pretty bad.

[hattedhedgehog]

-Lips aren’t just naturally red “as if she’d been drinking wine but they were just like that without makeup cause she’s so perfect,” my dear little Kvothe from ‘Name of the Wind’. Also, girls do not naturally smell like fruit or flowers, it’s either perfume or something she’d been eating recently.

[generalistherbalist]

I’ve been appreciating this post but now it’s back very specifically calling out my problematic faves and I don’t think those male authors realize how much it totally takes me out of the story for a moment when they commit these errors. It does nothing useful for the plot and is annoying for half of the audience

[lmorasey-deactivated20230917]

Is it weird that I’m female and wasn’t aware of a solid third of these?

[infinitelyblankpage]

I mean, all writes take note. I basically live in man land when it comes to protagonists so I don’t know half these things despite being a woman

[furryarbiterangel]

(Most) Women do not look at themselves in the mirror and compare their breasts to fruit. Any sort of fruit. Especially melons. Please save us from the melons.

Also we are not aware of our breasts at all times. I do not walk down a flight of stairs and think “oh golly my breasts are bouncing so much right now”. They are as much as natural part of our bodies as arms. Do you constantly think about how your arms are moving? Sure you may be aware of them, but paying full attention? Doubtful.

[dukeofbookingham-deactivated202]

Also: women working out are almost never sexy. They’re not glowing or glistening or (kill me) *sparkling*. They are red and sweaty and gross just like all the dudebros doing their time with the dumbbells. Stop ogling fictional women at the gym, TOM WOLFE.

[onelittlekingdom]

Our Current Structure

* I wake her up almost every morning. She gets snoozes if she asks. (She always asks) 

* When she sleeps away, I pick her panties from what she has given me as a selection the night before. When she sleeps with me, I reach into her bag and pick one. 

* Every morning she wakes elsewhere, I get devotional pics of her wearing the panties I’ve chosen for her that day.

* When she sleeps with me, I pack her morning bowl.

*When she sleeps with me, I pack her food to take to work. 

* When she gets morning wake up calls, the final call ends with me telling her, “boots on the ground little soldier”. 

* When she spends the night, we share a cigarette before we part to head to work. 

* She gets medicine reminders at 9am and 9pm every day. They are always, “Take your medicine little girl.”, to which her response is always, “Thank you Daddy.”

* Whenever we leave each other I text her emojis within minutes to remind her that though she has gone, she is still being thought of. 

* In eating food three times daily, she reports her food intake with me throughout the day. 

* Each day she hits all the beats in her structure, she earns a sticker at the end of the day. 

JD

[tooprettytolive]

Every day he give me affirmations that I’m a good girl.

When I sleep with Daddy and wake him up from a nightmare, he holds me close and pets my hair.

When I need to get clean he helps dry me off, brushes my hair, puts my lotion on me.

When I cannot possibly orgasm one more time he says ‘I don’t know little girl, I think you can’

[domme-ms-deactivated20210907]