Know what, however poorly the pangkey date goes today, it can’t go as badly as the spiderbit date from the qsmp, in which:
They were broken up on the day of because qCellbit killed qRoier’s weird grandfather multiple times and quite possibly ate his corpse
That day, Cellbit had broken Roier’s heart AGAIN by trying to make him jealous by pretending to marry qQuackity at the Festa Junina church
Cellbit was absolutely wasted and trying to kill himself like twenty minutes later because he didn’t see a point in living if Roier hated him
And then the date actually happens, and Roier’s DAD, qFoolish, shows up and literally joins the date while disguised as Mario From Mario
Roier drinks enough alcohol on the date to violently throw up over both himself and Cellbit multiple times
They go back to Cellbit’s house, where he shows Roier a painting of. The two of them, plus Cellbit’s son, and Roier’s dead son posing in a family portrait. And this is hidden behind a fake wall and a trapdoor passageway and it had already been established that Cellbit would just go and kinda Stare at it sometimes
A deep conversation happens. Cellbit not only comes out as asexual, but also an escaped serial killer/war criminal/cannibal. Roier asks if he would ever kill him. Cellbit says, and I quote, “Not you, I’d kill for you, but never you”
After one single successful date, Cellbit proposes again, because he’s possibly the biggest gay disaster in the history of mcrp. And somehow?? Roier accepts???
And Then Roier Jumps Off Of A Balcony
Like, that’s probably a good date by mcrp standards, but also. What the fuck /pos
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