Being alterhuman is strange, for me atleast, I connect with foxes on many levels, but never in a I was supposed to be a fox in this life way, I connect in a way that I can describe as I was meant to have their tail and ears, that a fox once held the life that fuels my soul, that a fox stands by my side and guides my current life. I connect with foxes in their gentleness, I connect with foxes in their families, I connect with foxes the same as I connect with the forest
The forest connection I hold is that of the dew on the leaves, the softness of moss, the sunlight gleaming through the leaves, the way the trees reach to clouds
And then for deers, I connect in those softer ways but it’s mostly a connection fueled by the coping link I subconsciously established, the anger at the world, the yearn for antlers is due to the connection to bucks and due to my need to protect my loved ones. I connect to deers in the way bucks fight, I connect to deers like a prey animal who will fight because I refuse to go down without one.
My connection with bodies of water is similar, I connect in the waves crashing against the rocky beaches, the undertow attempting to bring it’s lost children back, the emptiness in certain places alongside the bountiful reefs, I connect to the sea’s rage at those who take and poison it. But I also connect to its calm.
And then there’s my connection to plants, I connect to kelp and sea grass in the way they dance in the water,
However for the forest, water bodies and plants I can’t tell if that’s a ‘way to express my gender’ feeling or a ‘my soul remembers these, the lives I once lead were parts of these’ I do
Then my urge to be folklore comes into play and it gets worse, my urge to be wild, to be the whispers of the children, to be known through a rhyme, but not as a already known cryptic being, as a something else, maybe a dryad, maybe a naiad, I don’t know all I know is my soul yearns for that life, to be the one townsfolk speak of, not in fear I don’t think but out of legend, from sightings caped in unknown.
I do wish for antlers that reach tall to protect with the ears and tail of a fox, and dress myself in skins, bones, and dried plants, my essence yearns to be part of many things but the forest, the forest holds the monopoly on it.