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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

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@zombiepsychic
i hate the way fat antagonists have their weight moralized and used as a metaphor for greed and corruption and i hate the way it's overcorrected into fat people being "soft squishy friend-shaped cupcakes who look like they give incredible hugs" and i long for the day we have nuanced, interesting, and complicated fat characters and most of all i long for the day people are normal about fatness
A child is punished for moving and making noise.
To avoid more punishment, the child sits still and is quiet. But they have to actively remind themself constantly to sit still and be quiet.
The teacher sees the child sitting still and being quiet. The teacher treats this as the baseline.
Since the child is putting a lot of effort into sitting still and being quiet, doing so distracts from paying attention to what the teacher is teaching. The child then is punished for not paying attention.
The child now knows that they'll be punished no matter what they do. And they can't explain why they struggle, because any attempt to explain is arguing.
"I'm only criticizing the people who are lazy on purpose" is just not the reassurance people think it is when nearly every disabled person has been accused of not really being disabled and just being lazy on purpose
"girl dinner" "boy kibble" can y'all just eat a meal gender neutrally
gender neutrients
I actually do think we should discourage women from becoming housewives. Do not become financially dependent on a man. That's how a lot of women ended up dead over the years. A man gets violent suddenly and you have to choose between homelessness or potentially dying at his hand because you have an enormous gap in your resume and no degrees or certifications or anything that will help you pursue a career that will allow you to be financially independent. He owns your bank account. His name is probably the one on the car. Try and leave and he can report it stolen. Where will you go then?
Don't become a housewife.
And if you do become a housewife, take steps to protect yourself. Make sure you’re legally married, for starters; stay-at-home girlfriends have very little legal recourse to claim their partner’s assets in a breakup. Make sure your name is on the house deed/rental agreement, and have your car in your name, even if your spouse is paying for it. Have your spouse transfer money every month into an account solely in your name, so you can buy yourself things without needing permission, but also so you can save up to leave if needed.
If your spouse fights you on any of this, then don’t quit your job. The tradwife to poverty pipeline is real, and so is financial abuse.
also, many women/people experience controlling behaviour and domestic violence from their partner for the first time during pregnancy. don’t risk thinking “he’s just stressed, it’ll get better when the baby comes” because it won’t. neither you and your child will ever be safe with that man. get out as early and safely as you can
you have to be kinder to people with memory issues.
you have to be kinder to people who are slow processors.
you have to be kinder to people who don't understand your jokes.
you have to be kinder to people who forget important dates.
you have to be kinder to people with cognitive decline.
you have to be kinder to people who were always this way, too.
you have to be kind. you have to be kind.
sexism in medicine kills people. racism in medicine kills people. fatphobia in medicine kills people. queerphobia in medicine kills people. classism in medicine kills people. ableism in medicine kills people.
do not downplay people’s fears about being mistreated because they are a part of a marginalised group. it is a matter of life and death and you should be angry about it.
everybody: you’ve got to advocate for yourself in medical settings!
medical professionals when a patient advocates for themselves in a medical setting (x100 if that patient is a part of any minority): damn. you’re a hypochondriac crazy bitch who has every mental illness and is seeking every narcotic in existence. that’s the only reason you’d be disappointed in the care you’re receiving here. in retaliation, we will be even less helpful and less sympathetic. our jobs are hard. people are dying. we don’t have time to deal with anyone who is slightly inconvenient for us.
everything going downhill but at least there’s still phone in bed time am I right.. ahah am I right
my that one friend that's too woke opinion is that in a similar vein to how you almost never see fat people or women without makeup on tv you never really see anyone experiencing incontinence issues unless it's a humiliating comedic moment at their expense and that's kind of scary
like sorry to be the bearer of bad news but people piss themselves. when they're afraid. when they've experienced mental and/or physical trauma and their body needs a way to express that stress. when they've been sexually assaulted. when they get older and their muscles start to wear out from a lifetime of service. a not insignificant majority of people Will experience incontinence in their lifetimes and while there are steps you can take to manage it for your own comfort and others', there's simply no moral dimension to it whatsoever. & like i'm not saying every show and movie needs checkhov's bed wetting scene but we have seriously got to get more okay with acknowledging that somehow.
Not wanting to have sex is NOT a problem. It doesn’t matter if you are asexual or allo, there is nothing wrong with not wanting sex. It’s just an activity. That’d be like saying that if you don’t like soccer, you need to go to soccer therapy to figure out why you dislike it and figure out how to like it because it’s for your own good. See how ridiculous that sounds? IT IS OK TO NOT WANT TO HAVE SEX AND IT IS NOT SOMETHING THAT NEEDS TO BE FIXED!!!!!!
Something I've thought about several times is how amatonormativity/allonormativity could potentially be a cause for so many people going down the incel pipeline, which often results in them going down the alt-right pipeline, too. If society didn't say that romantic and sexual relationships were the most important relationships, if it valued friendship and family and other forms of community and even self-love more, then maybe a lot of these people would feel a lot less lonely and not become so hateful.
Like obviously some people just decide to be miserable, but if society could prioritize other types of relationships (including your relationship with yourself, btw. I think even just having more love and forgiveness for yourself can make you an overall kinder person) instead of insisting that everyone needs a romantic/sexual partner, then maybe a lot of these people wouldn't feel so alone.
Obviously fuck anyone who says gross incel shit, but also fuck amatonormativity and allonormativity.
going down the wikipedia rabbit hole again
the thing about "just say you have a boyfriend to make that guy leave you alone" and "just say you are a couple so you can get that apartment" and "just marry your friend for tax benefits" is that they aren't actually solutions to any of the underlying problems, and I'm tired with the discussion always ending there. No please keep going and explain why being in a relationship would solve these issues and why you think that isn't actually a problem?
people saying that being trans is a white only thing is very strange to me because i remember when i was a kid people acted like it was pretty much only black people and thai people who were trans. obvsiouly both of those things are based in racism and transmisogyny but the rapid shift is strange