only the lowest-quality posts

pan, she/they -- linux my beloved -- adult

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

Can’t talk rn dude, yearning.

[yaoiblackmold]

Top 3 things people love insisting they don't have despite it being impossible

Pronouns

An accent

Bias

[silliestflowergirl]

4. uno

[notmonaca]

i don't have it i got the oldest xbox known to man

[star-angel-selkie]

with your help i cantake over the religiously appropriated land of utah and turn every mormon jesus statue intoe fat teto

[star-angel-selkie]

if this post gets 20,000 notes meet me in salt lake

[wolfram-blorbos]

having a resting bitchface is so funny because i'll be doing something relaxing, and really enjoying myself and my face will look like this

[contemptible-scoundrel]

is high jump kicking peoples dogs punk

[lord-of-the-noodles]

no, to punk is to love

[contemptible-scoundrel]

I love to high jump kick peoples dogs

[drlombriz]

won’t a high jump kick miss most dogs? they’re usually kinda low to the ground

[contemptible-scoundrel]

whats not clicking

[parkchanwoohoo]

It is so fucking funny to me how easily scandalized some people are wym callout post for a cannibalism kink. Grow up. This is the nothingburger leagues and you're throwing up in the stands

[anomalocaris-in-da-clurb]

It’s actually the peopleburger leagues

[parkchanwoohoo]

Blocking for being funnier than me

[danielkanhai]

i hate when apps know that i’m screenshotting something. when i screenshot something, that’s me acting outside your realm of understanding, app. i am beyond what you consider the observable universe. you’re not supposed to perceive me. we don’t know when god screenshots the earth. we don’t know when he’s like, “okay i’m just gonna take a pic in case i ever want to add dinosaurs back to something later and don’t remember how.” and if we did, we wouldn’t act all smug about it like, “hey, you wanna share that post? you could just click here to share it.” no, man. you didn’t catch me. i screenshotted this for my own reasons. what’s next? i can’t take a photo of my computer screen with my phone out of laziness without being shamed by the printer i don’t own?

[proxmox-official]

The version of tumblr I have installed rn pops up some bullshit like “Would you like to share this post instead?” like fuck you fuck you fuck you don’t bother me with that bullshit I hate you.

[aroace-ryland-grace]

the sewing machine is like if a horse and an inkjet printer had a child

[pitbolshevik]

i still think about the fucking quesadilla terf

[pitbolshevik]

iirc it was like this terf who was absolutely fuming because her brother was dating a trans woman and she started claiming that she was clearly male socialized because the terf made quesadillas for dinner and the trans woman was like "wow :) this is really good, what is it?" and if she was a REAL woman she would instinctively KNOW what a quesadilla is

anyway it turns out the reason the poor woman didn't know what it was was because the terf had used hummus instead of cheese for some fucking reason so it wasn't even a quesadilla

[ammnontet]

[betterisbest]

[galaxywarp]

once you realize you don’t actually need to sleep, you can really (stops talking abruptly and stares straight ahead for 4 minutes)

[threeofswords]

ohh yeah im a real piece of shit 👍 job please

[dogpuppy]

[fwizard]

all i need is a sweet treat. and six thousand dollars

[ozempicofficial]

[mschelle]

Well hot damn if it wasn't enough for this loser to throw a public tantrum now he's going out of his way to follow predestrogen on other platforms and start harassing her there!!! You can't hide these Matt I got the screenshots lol!!!!!!

HE'S BLATANTLY LYING OUT OF HIS ASS!! SPREAD IT AROUND!! And also since she seems to be from Ireland even though I don't even know shit about eu laws from what little I do know this is a big violation of GDPR and should be reported as such!! https://commission.europa.eu/law/law-topic/data-protection/reform/rights-citizens/redress/what-should-i-do-if-i-think-my-personal-data-protection-rights-havent-been-respected_en

[creatureofthecornfield]

@photomatt should kill himself.

[fleshengine]

I genuinely hope this circulates forever.