The Locked Tomb Stole My Sanity

And like several other people’s. Full of spoilers please browse with caution if you haven’t finished the series.

[snowleek]

gratuitous gideon nav biceps in cutoff tank when she has canonically never been sleeveless is the breasting boobily of the tlt fandom. rabid dykes all of you. I shall reblog as usual

[10thousandbees]

You fools. Gideon Nav isn’t Orpheus. She’s Eurydice. Harrowhark Nonagesimus is the most Orpheus-coded character that has ever existed

[nav-igating]

harrowhark nonagesimus didn’t give herself a lobotomy to prevent herself from turning around just so people could call her eurydice

[mayasaura]

Seriously tho Palamedes said his battle with Ianthe took "a great deal longer" than a few seconds. How long did it take?? What was it like?

It would have been in the River, like Wake and Nonius' duel. And it would have been between two master necromancers already proficient in navigating the River. It could be anything. All bets are off.

[sarsaparillaswords]

Remember how when Palamedes was trapped in the river all he had to read was a romance novel about a necromancer named Abella Trine? And how he got so bored he started writing fanfiction about Abella?

Just saying.

[mayasaura]

You are so right. Palamedes and Ianthe canon Regency AU where in those five seconds they live a whole second life in a River bubble as bitter high society rivals locked into a complicated game of social chess. Winner gets the body.

[midnightsnapdragon]

The Unwanted Guest - Reactor

Palamedes Sextus and Ianthe Tridentarius match wits on a dreamlike battlefield.

can't believe op predicted the unwanted guest

[kyotospartyart]

Say it, loser

[jademaomi]

reading nona the ninth and shaking my head the whole time so the people on the train know i don't agree with building cow walls

[gallium-spoon]

Confession:

I made a post on this very hell site, maybe a year ago or so, where I admitted my suspicion that the locked tomb is some kind of scifi horror goncharov given that every post about it seemed utterly buckwild but also totally disconnected from every other post about it id seen except for being the same genre of unsettling

Someone responded to that post with something along the lines of 'sorry, it's all real, even God's cow wall'

This response haunts me

I don't know what God's cow wall is. I have no context for God's cow wall. I've seen no other post about God's cow wall until this post today

I lose sleep contemplating the implications of God's cow wall

The only thing keeping me going is that this lack of context means I can convince myself that this is a wall *for* cows and not a wall *of* cows

I don't dare to actually read tlt and risk having my protection of ignorance ripped away from me

[gallium-spoon]

People keep telling me Cow Facts now and it's gone from interesting to alarming real fast

Why does everyone suddenly want to share that cows watch sunsets?!? What does it mean?!?

[thechekhov]

Harrow's necromantic power includes the ability to create underlighting whenever it's necessary.

Bonus:

[eyes-inthe-dark]

omj just saw a beloved mutual go through the end of nona and remembered i never posted my jod cosplay

here he is! the bastard! the necroslut prime! #1 best worst dad!!

tried my best to embody the awkward "I'm just a guy, haha, i'm so normal" energy

[the-rat-eatery]

Hay guys did we know that Rick Riordan read Gideon the ninth and put it at 5/5 stars?

[sunfloowerlatte-art]

late night doodles. if this is anything

[katakaluptastrophy]

Are you a Locked Tomb fan? Do you struggle to describe the series to friends and family who dislike science fiction and fantasy, and prefer the kind of novels The New Yorker describes as "a blistering exploration of the human condition" and the odd tasteful murder mystery? Don't worry, I've got you covered:

1. Stranded in a decaying pile, a group of aristocrats and their servants contend with political intrigues, transgressive relationships, and existential questions while stalked by an unknown killer.

2. A teenage girl, struggling with memory loss after a terrible accident, is groomed by a charismatic religious leader at his isolated compound. As she tries to avoid confronting her past, the lines between reality and fantasy seem to blur.

3. A young girl with learning difficulties finds joy with her found family amidst the horrors of a refugee camp. A climate scientist confesses how he came to commit murder. Their parallel narratives with come to overlap explosively.

[jillothewisp]

yeah she "pegged me", and by "pegged" haha well. let's just say...,sword through my chest

[brungeons-and-bragons]

Welcome to The Locked Tomb! Our books are told through the point of view of

-jock stuck at a renn faire murder mystery party

-schizophrenic malnourished teenager granted unspeakable power

-a baby. Like an actual 6 month old infant.

Good luck!

[sapphling]

it fucking sucks that getting impaled """kills you""" they should at least give you one freebie. i would look soooo sexy and boyish getting martyred on the spear

[vengesim]

Gruel post incoming!

[vernans]

camilla “i need to start carrying around a microscope” hect. camilla “i didn’t have a measuring tape. i always carried measuring tape after that” hect. camilla “i had started keeping a pocket torch a few years back” hect

[pandorasboxholdshope-deactivate]

ITS A BAPTISM!

The child of God (Gideon) accepts the confession of sins from a devoted (Harrow) and then submerges her in water as a symbolic act of forgiveness.

[harrowedsoup]

I can’t believe that for most of Gideon the Ninth the griddlehark dynamic was pretty much a sexually charged version of them: