3rd times the charm

[despazito]

Another one for "objectively funny crimes should not be punished"

[teaboot]

Took Ollie to the vet today. And I'm not gonna say who. But ONE of us had a panic attack immediately after the checkup and wouldn't get out of the sink

[teaboot]

it was a difficult morning for everybody

[treasuredplanet]

in hindsight sending the number one digit at a time created the funniest half second of either of our lives

[pokeween]

im actually fucking crying right now

[carnival-phantasm]

The only thing I miss about Brands on tumblr are those shitass 4 frames gifs they used to make

[ankle-beez]

An all time classic

[carnival-phantasm]

[mcflurry-of-dancing-flames]

Electro’s power can not be contained

[carnival-phantasm]

Conquer the Realm! Dominate the Final Fantasy XV Universe with unstoppable forces. Play for free now!

[hackfurs]

General tumblr reminder, since some people don't know: If the person's URL has "deactivated" plus a string of numbers (a date) after it, that means that they manually deleted their own blog. It doesn't mean they were banned. Banned blogs don't have "deactivated" after them and will just be the normal URL you can't click on or interact with. They look very similar and function the same, but they were caused by two very different things.

[hackfurs]

thats not true i dont think people would do that

[sacred-portal]

[segamascott]

[thickness-protection-program]

my bad bro

[glutko]

Got Yoshi to lick this man's balls lol

[junglejim4322]

Doctor calls you with your bloodwork results and just says “I’m really mad at you” and then hangs up

[fupafiend]

"this post contains potentially mature content" and its... a dirty joke... a bloody scene from an action movie... tasteful nudity... sometimes none of these even... and of course a regular fully clothed transgender woman... i dont think i could ever hate christians enough

[gay--dog]

has anyone made a monkey ball mod/clone where samus is the ball. that has to exist right theres no way it doesnt

[shadowblade8192]

9/11 could never happen today because the twin towers arent there anymore for some reason

[fongus-the-ninth]

Likely one of the funniest things we will get from the extremely late-to-the-party among us show

[justiceinspandex]

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

My favorite emoji expression me and my friends came up with is "throwing rocks at it"

Basically if you ever see or hear something that displeases you, You go like this:

🫳🪨

🫳🪨🪨🪨🪨🪨🪨

☺️🫳🪨🪨🪨

So on and so forth. But also if something is beautiful or true you throw lotus.

🫳🪷🪷🪷

[phineastratchet-deactivated2025]

I have one that;s called "picking grapes off the vine"

🍇🤏

🤌🟣

this method could also be used to pick other things, if you'd like...

🎂🤏🤌🕯️

🐒🤏🤌🦟

[slightlydraconic]

⛰️🤏🤌🪨

🫳🪨

[pinnipetal]

It deeply saddens me that "pdf file" has become slang for pedo. Don't you dare disrespect my wife the beautiful portable document format ever again

[dualcasterjay]

and to the children in the notes saying we need this fucking baby talk to get around censorship online; there's been no credible evidence that any site other that YouTube (which will only demonetize your video, ftr) will actually censor or hide content that include words like rape, pedophile, gun, terrorist, etc. etc. and even if we take as a given they were (which, again, they are not), do not fucking comply in advance, you absolute fucking coward. and ESPECIALLY do not comply by altering your real life fucking vocabulary. don't let the technocrats dictate what words you say holy fucking shit dude!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mornington-the-crescent]

Do not live your life based on what someone is comfortable advertising next to.