Food, Fluff, Fandom and Fotos aka @amaditalks less serious side. Follows, etc. will come from this username. All content queued. Header photo by Dave DiCello.
Owlet came, dropped Infinite Coffee and Protection Detail and then bounced. 265,000 words, 120,000 kudos, 29,000 comments, and not another word posted since June 2019.
(Yoinked this from LinkedIn, genuinely interested in seeing how responses align with demographics) (so far it’s those of us over 35 being indignant but I wanna see how those fully plays out) (it’s cultural and technological history/memory, bruh)
Fuck the network for that, for not being willing to pay to keep Peter and Angela with their star and exec producer salaries. Don't pay for Hulu or Disney+. Don't give the Mouse another penny. Pirate their shit and do it with joy.
eddie diaz's theory on the buckley law of attraction (gen | eddie vs chim, eddie&theo, buddie inherent in premise | 1.7k | eddie week day 2 - competition | chim is theo's favorite, eddie (and jee) get jealous)
okay, so, eddie likes to think of himself as a relatively reasonable guy.
(the buck living rent-free in his mind cackles. eddie tells him to shut the fuck up. just because he got a front seat to the times when eddie was perhaps and definitively not being reasonable does not mean that eddie is always like that.
ignore the load-bearing closets in his brain, they have nothing to do with this discussion.)
so. eddie. reasonable guy. generally decent at going with the flow. accepting things as they come.
however.
"mr. chimney!"
"oh my god, do i hear a superhero? maddie, call tmz, because i think we have a sighting of spiderman in LA!"
eddie picks his glass of iced tea back up from the backyard table, where he totally didn't set it down in anticipation of getting a hug from theo. beside him, christopher eyes him with the world-weary bemusement of someone who's been looking at college admission requirements.
"dad," he says calmly. "you're gonna crack the glass if you keep holding it that hard."
eddie takes an extremely calm sip of tea, watching theo practically cartwheel out of buck's laughing arms to run towards chimney. chimney, who catches him with an oomph and immediately allows the toddler to climb onto his back. chimney, who laughs as theo tugs at his hair, looking absolutely delighted.
chimney, who, according to buck, is theo's favorite person.
"hey eddie- uh, what's...up...?"
chris hands buck a glass of iced tea tiredly. "dad's being a freak," he informs him, as buck sits beside him.
"i'm fine," eddie grits out, glaring at chimney. buck frowns at him, then at chris. because chris is buck's favorite kid. and buck is christopher's favorite adult, which is why he's eddie's best friend. it just-- it makes sense. it's how the world works.
and chimney is theo's favorite adult. even though eddie is buck's best friend. even though theo is buck's...he's buck's. and eddie is also buck's. so surely by the transitive properties of buckliness eddie should get something.
theo cackles as chimney throws him into the air. even though eddie can throw him higher. because he's so much taller and also can do mma. chimney's never joined a fight club.
eddie stands up abruptly. buck startles slightly. chris sighs.
"i'm gonna go say hi to theo," eddie says, normally.
as he walks away, buck turns to chris: "should we stop him?"
chris already has his phone out, camera turned towards his dad. "no," he says. "let him get it out of his system."
---
to carry out his mission, eddie needs a partner.
not buck, despite the fact that eddie almost always wants buck to be his partner in everything, always (in a completely normal way). he has specific requirements for this. exact measurements, even. his head turns.
hen is chatting with athena on the porch, denny and mara crowded over denny's switch on a nearby chair. ravi, may, and maddie are talking about something, harry chiming in between bites of rotisserie chicken. karen is getting herself a glass of wine, and below the table--
there.
jee-yun looks at eddie with grumpy brown eyes as he crouches down to be eye-level with her, her tiny frame curled below the table in a sullen little ball.
"hey, jee," he says.
"uncle eddie," she pouts.
"why are you under the table?"
"daddy won't play with me," she frowns. crosses her arms. "because theo-" and eddie was unaware that a small child could pack that much venom into a single word. "- wanted him to play instead."
eddie watches her, then holds out a hand. "jee," he says, very solemnly. "do you want to join forces with me, to get your daddy to play with us?"
jee looks at him with assessing eyes, which makes eddie remember why he doesn't talk to maddie much. too many buckley genes capable of picking eddie apart.
finally, a tiny, imperious nod, and a hand in his.
---
this is one of those times when chris wishes he had two extra limbs, because buck's barbeque chicken and aunt maddie's potato salad are fire, but he really can't take the time to eat when he needs to capture the blackmail of the century.
"chris," buck hisses, nudging him in the side. chris glares at him a little, because that was a perfect shot, thank you very much. "are you sure we shouldn't-- actually, what the hell am i doing, i should go and stop them--"
"too late," chris says, as dad and jee hold up waterguns to theo and chimney's faces with honestly unsettling coordination, their other hands offering two more guns to the child and adult they're threatening.
"et tu, my daughter?" chimney says, sounding equal parts bemused and terrified. "and eddie? is this a coup or something?"
"this is a duel," dad intones. jee-yun nods, her princess tutu scrunched behind dad's neck. he looked so embarrassing. chris has to take in every moment of this.
"oh my god," buck whispers faintly, at the exact moment when chimney and theo grab their water guns, dad and jee's fingers tighten on their triggers, and chaos promptly ensues.
---
fun fact about eddie: he was in the military.
shocker, i know, but it's true. eddie was in the military, and got a silver star, and is currently using every iota of skill he's learned in basics to take chimney down.
"what the f-fudge, diaz?" chimney yelps, as he whips around to eddie's spray of ice-cold water on the back of his neck. "how the hell did you even get there?"
chimney didn't even understand flanking tactics. amateur. he'd been too distracted by jee-yun and theo rolling into a puddle as they sprayed one another, theo immediately splashing jee with mud and jee retaliating by using her longer reach to cover his entire face with pond water.
"it's called strategy, captain," eddie grins with maybe a few too many teeth. "now, are you ready to surrender?"
chimney looks at theo, who looks solemnly back at him. "never," he hisses.
"then you've left me with no choice," eddie tells him, as he pulls a small object out of his jacket pocket.
"when the fuck--" chimney begins, before the bomb hits, exploding in a spray of water that knocks him backwards. oops. maybe eddie threw that a little too hard.
"MR. CHIMMEY," theo yells, running towards chim.
"THAT'S MY DADDY," jee screams, tackling him.
"oh shit," eddie says, approximately two seconds before a broad hand grabs the back of his collar and he is turned to face a deeply unimpressed buck.
---
"say hi to the viewers, dad."
"hi to the viewers, dad," eddie deadpans. chris makes a face at him, then swings the camera back around to film his own face.
"tell them what you're doing, dad."
eddie stares at the camera. chris stares back. eddie sighs.
"i'm in time out."
chris grins, zooming the camera out to show the dining chair eddie is sitting in, indoors and, according to buck, "away from potential damage."
then, he shifts the camera slightly. "hi, jee."
jee-yun crosses her arms and pouts harder. "i didn't push him hard," she complains.
chris turns the camera around to give the lens a deadpan stare. "so much mud," he whispers. "so many tears."
the only saving grace here is that between him and buck, they'd managed to convince chris to keep his social media to a private instagram. eddie isn't sure what he'd do if chris put this on tiktok. he's pretty sure that he was gonna get Looks from all of christopher's terrifying teenage friends as it was.
"and how long are you going to be in time out?" chris asks them, a glee that eddie is adamant he gets from shannon in his voice.
"until they're not a menace to society anymore," maddie says, coming out from the kitchen with a hand on chimney's shoulder, as the other man grins at eddie with a bag of frozen peas pressed against the bruise on his chin. eddie winces. yeah, maybe that was fair.
then chim grins, and eddie changes his mind. his captain was gonna milk this for the rest of their fucking lives.
"insubordination," he mouths to eddie. eddie resists the urge to give him a rude gesture back, but only because maddie was glaring at him, and eddie knows that she has murdered two separate people who were a threat to her husband.
behind them, buck walks out with theo in his arms, the toddler looking perfectly happy as he chews on a creamsicle. buck gives him a disappointed look, which eddie finds unfair. how the hell did buck perfect bobby's disapproval from beyond the grave?
"you wanna go out and play again?" buck asks theo. theo shakes his head, curls flopping and still flaked with mud.
"wanna play with mr. chim," he says. eddie twitches. chris snickers.
jee-yun narrows her eyes at him. for a moment, the entire room braces for an explosion. but then, she shuffles her chair closer to eddie. "fine," she says, imperious. "then i get uncle eddie."
jaws drop. bags of peas hit the floor. christopher's camera shakes as he cries with laughter.
theo's mouth opens in a perfect o, his eyes fill with tears. buck catches the popsicle before it can go into his hair.
"THAT'S MY EDDIE," a voice decidedly disproportionate to a toddler-sized body echoes throughout the room.
chimney gapes at jee-yun. "jee, honey," he says, pleading, as maddie sighs. "you still love daddy best, right? daddy's still more fun than uncle eddie?"
"this is the best day of my life," chris whispers, capturing everything with his phone camera. theo scrambles out of buck's arms to grab eddie's jean leg. jee immediately tries to kick him. maddie and buck grab at their prospective children.
eddie? well. not to say eddie likes the chaos incited in his honor. he's a reasonable guy, after all.
but it's nice, he thinks, scooping a crying theo up, patting jee on the head. to know that his theory about the buckley law of attraction is validated.
(well, he corrects himself, glancing out the corner of his eye. except for maddie. he owes maddie a gift basket.)
Okay. I was on my beloved AO3 and I saw something that made me do a double take. So, now I really want to know…
What is your AO3 user ID?
I’m an OG user 5 digits or less
Six figures baby!
I’m in the millions…
Voting ended onJul 27
I’m so curious to see how long people have been on AO3! I know some people have been on there since beta/invite only, but I would love to see what the number is on tumblr!
I often think about how The Mentalist exists in the Psych universe, and I keep meaning to go through and look to see if anybody appeared in both shows to create a paradox. Has anyone done that?
gracieabrams
vaporwave
andulkaphoto
2087
dailybridgerton
discoholicmusic
germansingergirl
titsay
