Just trying to have a good time in this life

A nerdy, cat loving dude! Duncan, 31, he/him 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ Art blog is Vaporwavemonk-art.tumblr.com Header art by pettyartist.tumblr.com !

[soundclown]

[teethwreath]

[makingtrouble]

It's my cat's birthday (anniversary of me getting him) so I told him the story of his life while petting him real good

Highlights include:

For your first two years (when you were small) you lived in a foster home with people who raised you into a very polite young man. Two is like you plus me, that's what two is.

Some people adopted you before me and they called you Timmy (which is a stupid name) and they returned your ass almost immediately because you were so annoying at that age.

Like think about how annoying you are right now at seven years old, but way worse.

I'm better than them though, I don't call you Timmy and I wore earplugs to bed for three years because you love to scream at bedtime. Earplugs are like when I roll over and go back to sleep even when you are yelling so so so loud.

I got you at a time in my life when I was really sick (being sick is like when I'm up late because I'm throwing up and you are a very handsome good boy who sits with me) and they had to put me asleep for a procedure. A procedure is like what happened to you when they put you asleep and took your balls away.

Now you've lived with me for five years. Five is like the number of toe beans on one of your feet. When I clip your nails five is when we're halfway done. But we're hopefully not even halfway done with how long we get to be together. I'm gonna have to figure out new ways to help you count.

[makingtrouble]

Actually I've decided this is a poem

[ot3]

i won't pretend i've never been guilty of shopping for clothes at the soup store, but sometimes i see people criticizing media for not delivering an experience it was never intended to deliver and just get a little bewildered by it. just saw a very sincere post from someone critiquing splatoon's narrative writing for being "stunted and juvenile." well yes. it's side content in an all-ages pvp shooter. it's not even that i disagree with the critiques being made in the post it's that i just can't understand why they are being framed as if character-forward or complex narrative writing is something it is natural to expect from the splatoon franchise for some reason.

[turing-tested]

Sorry am on lsd. Shouldn't have told you 2 eat a sandwich. That is your decision not mine. Sorry

this ask is so awesome. my favorite part is I can't find the other ask they're apologizing for.

[g0ldenfur]

Sometimes I think he's a little too comfortable

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

I do wish we could make it a little more socially acceptable to wander the streets at night weeping inconsolably I feel like that would have a great catharsis factor for a lot of people

[setulose]

Trace amounts of Monica in my life

[telekitnetic-art]

🏮🐟

Custom formline commission for @talisoundwave! Thank you for commissioning me!! :>

[greelin]

Those Feratu

[yamato-usagi3284tloz]

[cherriielle]

**haunting ethereal noises start playing** 🌲🌳🌿

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[taraxippos]

I think this is the single funniest artfight rule. Like....I guess?

[taraxippos]

[taraxippos]

WHO DID THIS

[nalivaa]

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

[lelouch]

they couldn't put him in the beer campaign so he was represented by a bunch of berries

[dark-romantics]

there’s something so fucking magical about bookstores and libraries

[colormush]

[mumblesplash]

it’s so magical and beautiful that there are sprawling interconnected cave systems carved deep into the earth by various geological forces and you don’t have to go in them. there are miles and miles of stone passageways in total darkness that require you to exhale all the air out of your lungs to squeeze through parts of them and you don’t have to be there. some of these squeezes are underwater and require cave divers to take off their oxygen tanks and push them through ahead of them and me i am above ground looking at the sky as we speak. there are untold subterranean wonders no human has ever seen and i will not be the one to discover them #grateful #blessed

[mumblesplash]

so true there could be any number of undiscovered species down there all of which are none of my business and never will be. peace and love on (the surface of) planet earth 💕