Damian: Drake, I require your assistance completing some tasks.
Tim: You need my help? Me?
Damian: Yes. Unfortunately, Richard decided that for me to complete the list of tasks he assigned me, I needed to partner with you. It will be painful, but I believe we can co-exist until the completion of this assignment.
Damian: I will do them, and I will do them with perfection. You will collaborate with me, or there will be consequences
Tim: Oh, I'm so scared. What are you gonna do? Cut my line again?
Damian: I will send Superboy all the poetry you wrote about his arms and buttocks
Tim's blood draining from his face: What?
Damian: Every last one. Even the Haiku.
Damian: Yes. He will learn what you wish he would do to you in a 5-7-5 syllable format, you dirty little harlot.
Tim: No! NO! Okay, I'll help, just don't release my poems.
Damian: Excellent, I'm glad we see eye to eye. Now, our assignment is a list of tasks with varying time limits. I organize them into two categories: Most achievable and most pressing. The ones that overlap will be our top priority.
Tim: Okay. What's our first one?
Damian: Convince Daniel Fenton to marry Richard. We must make haste, for Fenton is currently engaged to the hero Phantom, but they are not yet wed.
Tim shock: We are NOT breaking up a marriage!
Damian: They are not married yet so marriage will not be broken. We are simply, enlightening, Fenton of a better option. To the Batmobile!
Tim: Wait we're doing this as ROBIN AND RED ROBIN!?
Dick two floors above them chatting with Jason over a cup of tea: So I gave Damian some tasks to complete because the parenting books said he needed a chorse list to teach responsibility and create stimulation.
Jason: Damian doing chores? I find that hard to believe
Dick: He did reject doing "servant work," so I got creative. I made a bunch of fake tasks like "visit the local museum and write a security report". By the time he finishes, Damian will be well-rounded.
Jason: Brilliant. What else was on there?
Dick: Let me pull it up. I sent it through email-OH NO
Dick: I SENT THE WRONG ONE. I SENT THE BUCKET LIST FROM WHEN I WAS FIFTEEN!
Jason: I'm sure Damian will realize that its the wrong list
Cass walking by: He didn't. He's on his way now to stop Daniel Fenton from getting married
Dick: I HAVEN'T SEEN THAT GUY SINCE HIGH SCHOOL GRADUATION! WE HAVE TO STOP DAMIAN
Duke poking his head in: Are you sure? Cause he got Tim to help him. This is the first time I've seen them bond
Jason: How did that happen?
Dick:....number 5 on my list was to "Get along with my lame brother"
Jason touched: I made the bucket list?
Steph opening the window she lowkey used to break in: Ugh guys not to alarm anyone but Tim just texted me that he is going to stop a wedding to the Ghost King and he needed me to wipe his computer data. I think he's gone off the deep end again. Anyone want to help me hold him down for his needle and grippy socks?
Dick horrified: Danny is getting married to the GHOST KING?!
Bruce at the doorway carrying multiple pizza boxes: Hey kids I brought pizza who wants to-
Dick: OUT OF THE WAY OLD MAN. I HAVE TO SAVE HUMANITY
Bruce watching his son run down the street: Dang it, we were doing so well for this month too. *Yelling* Someone get Dick's night night needle and his grippy socks!
