Practicing necromancy to escape Capital.

Alex, 30, Jewish Nonbinary: They/Them biodegradable fool

[nerianasims]

That's one hell of a conspiracy theory you're believing, bud. Just out of curiosity, who's "they"?

[beardedmrbean]

[escuerzoresucitado]

[paper-mario-wiki]

there's a game which automatically conscripts you into play when you create a tumblr account, and its scoring rubric looks like this

and if too many of the things you want to have sex with are in the pink zone of this triangle you score low.

you have probably seen this game played without realizing it. whenever somebody says "hear me out" they are looking to score more points.

[paper-mario-wiki]

yes, thank you

[paper-mario-wiki]

been thinking about this some more. i find it very funny that people are, somewhat predictably, trying to score more points in the notes.

for those people, here's a more specific map, as well as examples for each section:

[willgrahamscock]

“I would die for my kids” your children want an apology

[willgrahamscock]

your made up scenario isn’t real (shocker) and makes no difference when your kids are starving for your acknowledgment of the pain you caused them. you’re only performing the role of a good parent, without having to actually do any heavy lifting

[willgrahamscock]

[top-cheese]

u cannot unfollow me in any way that matters

[top-cheese]

ill have my people reblog it to your people

[eilooxara]

[pixelartpeach]

E—m—d—a—s—h—N—e—c—k—l—a—c—e

[pixelartpeach]

Y—o—u—P—e—o—p—l—e—W—i—l—l—R—e—b—l—o—g—A—n—y—t—h—i—n—g

[seven-oh-four]

needs an em-dash at the beginning and/or end, otherwise the first or last letters will be right next to each other

[pixelartpeach]

϶—O—h—T—r—u—e—ϵ

(added clasps)

[pancake-blogging]

϶—F—r—i—e—n—d—s—h—i—p—B—r—a—c—e—l—e—t—ϵ

[too-many-blorbos]

϶—C—U—R—S—E—D—A—M—U—L—E—T—ϵ

[bees-official]

Cursed amulet necklace that doesnt have a cursed amulet its just the phrase cursed amulet

[sentientballofpeas]

϶—C—U—R—S—E—D—(¤)—A—M—U—L—E—T—ϵ

[pixelartpeach]

϶—T÷h÷a÷t÷s÷A÷G÷o÷o—d—P o

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀i n

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀t

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀S

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀I⠀⠀⠀⠀H

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀T

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀F

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀U

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀C

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀K

⠀⠀⠀⠀M⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Y

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀B⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀EA

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀D

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀S

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ϵ

[memewhore]

[general-illyrin]

@thescrapwitch, you can't leave this gold in the tags

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[ekjohnston]

*weeps uncontrollably at 9 o'clock in the morning*

God, I love randos on the internet who just want to be kind.

[magicratfingers]

[azurele]

*packing my suitcase for a 3 day trip* hm, but what if I need my terracotta warriors..

[dragon-in-a-fez]

a billionaire can never be held accountable, therefore a billionaire must never make a management decision

[isuggesteatingtherich]

i have a suggestion

[dragon-in-a-fez]

forcefemming the billionaires won't help

[dragon-in-a-fez]

sorry I thought you were someone else

[zingring]

I overheard my 14-yo say (while petting her cat), "you raw piece of corn. You unplugged toaster. The plate is spinning, but the light isn't on."

[trattenbach]

Happy Battle Against Richard Nixon's Immortal Soul Saturday

[pancakeke]

OK I have watched MANY videos and here it is for all you kids to learn your viral/meme video history, here are some premium vintage meme fodder:

Hampster Dance (1998) Rejected (2000) All Your Base (2001) Tidus Laughing (2001) The End of the World (2003) Badger Badger Badger (2003) Hyakugojyuuichi!!! (2003) GI Joe PSAs (2003) Llama Song (2004) Banana Phone (2004) Ddautta (There She Is!) (2004) Charlie the Unicorn (2005) Cillit Bang (2006) Caramelldansen (2006) Metal Gear Awesome (2006) Leekspin (2006) Marissa Stole the Precious Thing (2006) The Mysterious Ticking Noise (2007) Powerthirst (2007) Paffendorf (2007) Splash Attack (2007) Caipirinha Dance (2007) I Take a Potato Chip… (2007) Nico Nico Douga Medley (2007) Ronald McDonald Ran Ran Ru (2008) Danjo (2008) Giga Pudding (2008) The Ultimate Showdown (2008) Balsamic Vinegar (2008) Sakura-Con Commercial (2009) Shamwow (2009) Slapchop (2009) OK GO- Here It Goes Again (2009) Stu Making Chocolate Pudding at 4 AM (2010) HEYYEYAA (2010) Galo Sengan (2011)

There are probably more that I’m missing. Some of these videos are part of a series (GI Joe, Potter Puppet Pals) and I didn’t count shitty videos like those idiot laughing babies.

[bleutempete]

Oh my fucking god, I was a retro memer

[mousegirlheart]

they should make a wetter water that hydrates you 5 times as much. it should feel like a videogame health potion. instant healing. instant hydration.

[dogpuppy]