sorry, professor whats his nuts
I can’t stop laughing

oozey mess
KIROKAZE
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

Kiana Khansmith

tannertan36
todays bird

Love Begins
tumblr dot com
Cosmic Funnies
taylor price
noise dept.
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
NASA
trying on a metaphor

if i look back, i am lost
Not today Justin
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Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Show & Tell
Misplaced Lens Cap

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@asarcasticnoone
sorry, professor whats his nuts
I can’t stop laughing
http://m.dailykos.com/story/2015/08/03/1408341/-Psychologist-openly-admits-he-trains-police-officers-to-shoot-first-and-ask-questions-later S-I-G-N-A-L B-O-O-S-T
No. YOU DON’T GET TO DO THIS AND SLIP UNDER THE RADAR. Anyone who’s seeing this, I beg you to reblog. I want as many people to see this shit as possible.
this is really true tho!!! my uncle was a cop in NY & FL and they taught him to shoot first if he had to. anytime a cop feels threatened (and they basically teach cops they’re always threatened) they can shoot. its rlly sick psychological torture shit to help create a police state tbh
W H A T
Here’s a source from NY Times https://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/02/us/training-officers-to-shoot-first-and-he-will-answer-questions-later.html
Also! Click here to contact his organization and remind him of the blood on his hands. These are his murders too, and everyone involved deserves to feel the weight of guilt.
Recent newspaper blackouts by austinkleon
The Romans were total punstars.
you ever have a piece of bread that’s so good you understand the plot of les miserables?
opposite energy from tasting turkish delights for the first time and wondering wtf was edmund on
I laughed way too hard at this
in case anyone is looking through the notes trying to find the original artist it’s will mcphail !! feel free to check out his site but also here are some other things he made too !!
OOOHHH CLICK ON THAT LINK THIS GUY IS FUCKING GREAT
HOLY SHIT
this guy GETS IT
Here's the thing about shows like South Park and Family Guy that make their money off of being edgy and offensive. They fundamentally reduce their viewers' capacity for empathy. If I found a joke funny, and you found it offensive, you're just too sensitive. This is directly related to the ride of the alt right and the election of trump. In this essay I will
OP WHERE'S THE FUCKING ESSAY
So instead of writing the essay this is exactly what I'm talking about. This shit reduces your capacity for empathy. If you can't understand why people are hurt by a simple joke, nay, think that's the whole point... How the hell are you supposed to feel for someone when they come to you complaining of ACTUAL oppression? It's the foot in the door phenomenon. A little oppression isn't too bad, cuz it's funny, right? It hardens your heart against others
Somebody actually wrote this essay already. It's a Twitter thread about how the alt right recruits teenage boys by getting them to post slightly offensive memes... And then when they get called out and don't understand why the alt right channels their anger at feminists and women and people of color and liberals. According to this thread, boys are being "set up"
Read the whole thread at the link above this is just a snip
"offensive" shows like Family Guy are a precursor to the alt right and you can't change my mind
Y'all this shit so basic even Spongebob one it. It's not about being too sensitive. It's normalizing abuse through comedy that's a foot in the door to greater oppression.
if you c*nsor anything in a post you are l*gally required to put all of the omitted v*wels at the end as a footn*te
*eeoo
Okay th*n. *f you’r* sure about th*s.
Old Macd*nald had a farm.
*eieio
i’m going to shatter you like glass
my attempts at drawing frogs
you guys just see something vaguely froglike and hit reblog huh
The Good Place (2016-2020)
brah
The Good Place’s take on morality is so important to me. It never suggests that being good is easy or straightforward - quite the opposite - but it says, over and over again, that we need to try because we’re all people and we all matter.
Fuck you op this made coffee come out of my fucking nose it wasn’t even that funny fuck you
meirl
I mean.
Cartoon design is based off of 70s/80s fashion
So, it’s not wrong.
It’s rather likely
I’d like to add dickey collars for consideration.
I can picture him having an entire drawer devoted to an assortment of these, right next to his drawer full of ascots.
May I present this image from Legend of the Vampire?
what is the FUCKING truth
He has multiple outfits that all look identical while having completely different construction
book, movie, play, or musical: and it was love at first sight :)
my inner demisexual, rising from my person like the fucking kracken: ok but like, what are your mutual interests? what are your shared values? name me one (1) single fact you know about this individual other than how their face looks by moonlight? how is their sense of humor? will they get along with your friends? are they even nice? well jesUS DON’T KISS HIM YET, FOR ALL YOU KNOW HE’S A REPUBLICAN
as a rule, once a shitpost reaches more than ~50k notes, you can expect some degree of negative pushback. this is true literally no matter how innocuous the post or how carefully the views within are expressed. someone, somewhere, will find it in themselves to get upset about what you wrote and boy will they let you know.
part of existing on this site and maintaining any degree of sanity is recognizing this, and developing an instinct for when the criticism is valid & It Is Time To Change and Grow™, versus when the criticism is complete bullshit that you shouldn’t begin to engage with.
this post has reached the negative pushback phase in honestly record time, which i think maybe says something about the way that ace issues are treated in this particular moment in history. engaging with trolls is obviously just a waste of typing, but for the benefit of anyone out there truly willing to change and grow:
1. i am aware that love at first sight is just a storytelling device, but it’s a heightened expression of a thing that does observably happen in real life. people develop romantic and/or sexual interest in each other pretty quickly all the time.
2. i’m almost 32, and i have reached the realization of being ace after over a decade of hating myself for not having sexual interest in people at the “normal” speed and in the “normal” way. i didn’t randomly watch the first half of Frozen and decide, “oh, this must be the norm and i don’t match up to it, boo hoo.”
my feelings have come about from my lived experiences of consistently feeling like i’m doing something wrong every time someone expresses interest in sleeping with me on the first or second or third (or fourth or fifth or sixth) date and my only reaction is panic. oh shit, do i tell them no and risk a fight, or do i go along with it and try to pretend i’m okay with it.
3. i am not pretending to be ace for the attention. besides other ace people, the attention you get for being ace is pretty much uniformally bad. even people in my life who i love and trust the most have said hurtful things, because our culture has a really really hard time with the concept.
(our culture that does things like glorify instant romantic/sexual attraction, hmm)
i’m public about being ace because for over a decade, i didn’t have any words for how i experienced attraction and desire that were even neutral. the world told me i was weird and i believed it. it really sucked. i don’t want anyone else to have to go through that.
4. this post doesn’t “prove that demisexuality doesn’t exist.” for one thing, you can’t prove a negative.
5. i think that for anyone leaping up and going, “aha! proof that people who claim to be demisexual are just making it up because they got the wrong idea from cinema!” you should take a good hard look at why it is so very important to you to “disprove” an identity you don’t have, which doesn’t harm you in any way.
i am telling you i exist. you are telling me i don’t. one of us is right, dude.
6. yes, i still stand by “don’t kiss a republican.” it’s 2019. they voted for the people who put immigrant kids in cages. no kisses.
i can't get over how there is an actual doctor who episode where the whole plot boils down to: a woman fucked a wasp and had a child and that wasp child now kills people. brilliant.
I cannot fucking believe that OP left out the part where Agatha Christie is integral to the plot of the waspfucker episode
Bee Movie. Not even once
Disney Executive: so we’re going to give Kristoff a solo, right?
Disney Executive: but he’s going to have a chorus of reindeer singing with him
Disney Executive: also Sven talks and sings now too
Disney Executive: but like only for this scene and never again for the rest of the movie
Disney Executive: oh and it’s in the style of Queen/eighties rock ballad/early 2000s boy band
Disney Executive: and then we’re going to animate it to look like that meme of mike wasowski singing
Other Disney Executive (also high): oh that sounds so lit
In the Twilight universe, “vegetarian” vampires have golden eyes from drinking animal blood, a more ethical source than human blood, which would give them red eyes. It has also been established that a diet of human blood makes vampires physically stronger. So, if the Cullens wanted to become stronger without jeopardizing their morals, could they consume mosquitoes instead? How many mosquitoes would they have to eat to survive? Since mosquitoes drink from both humans and animals, what color would their eyes be? Orange? In this essay, I will
on average an adult has about 4.5-5.5 liters of blood circulating in their body. a female mosquito, when completely full, can hold up to 0.001-0.01 milliliters of blood in their abdomen depending on the species. if we take the average of both (5 liters & 0.0055 milliliters), it would take around 909,090 mosquitos to equal the amount of blood in a single human. although there isnt an exact number of the entirety of the mosquito population, we can use fermi estimation. there is about 57 million square miles of total land area on earth, while say 50 million square miles are habitable for mosquitos. with a rough of estimate of 1 mosquito per 50 square feet (overestimate due to area and time of year). after multiplying the numbers and fixing the units, there is a rough estimated 70 quadrillion mosquitos. theoretically, if a vampire lived in a mosquito dense area, such as brazil, indonesia, malaysia, thailand, etc, and could sustainably hunt around a million mosquitos to fill themselves every time they needed to feed, there would be enough mosquitos to survive on due to their large population and fast reproduction.
This is honestly everything I have ever wanted thank you for your contribution to the cause
Hey guys I think I figured out why vampires can turn into bats