funky little computer

they/it • 21 • no under 18s please • world's no. 1 solarized dark fan • blanket cw for blood/gore • posts mostly run on a queue

[augustputer]

lowercaseaugust -> augustputer

[loish]

Listen, I’m still afraid of inks because they’re so permanent. But I’m trying to embrace them more and be a bit bolder with them. Baby steps!

[molabuddy]

its a battle every time i shower

[foxwarrenart]

hope you don't mind op

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

today I found out my mother doesn't know what dandelions are and now I'm wondering what other strange secrets she's been quietly harboring

[krystal-prisms]

Where do you live that you don't have dandelions?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

So after extensive interrogation I have an update:

my mom is in fact aware that dandelions exist. she temporarily forgot the name and there was some miscommunication.

the truth is actually weirder

she's aware dandelions look like this

she is familiar with this flower. she knows the name of this flower. she declines to believe, however, that these are also dandelions

she does not believe these are the same plant. I tried to explain, and she thought I was either misinformed or lying. so I asked her what exactly did she think the yellow ones were called?

she answered, with complete confidence: Daffodils.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

gosh I enjoy this website

[glutton-for-funishment]

then wtf is a daffodil......................

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

buddy

[dragongirlsnout]

don't cry okay? huge as fuck bowl of strawberry

[dragongirlsnout]

Don't cry okay? Huge as fuck container of blueberry

[dragongirlsnout]

don't cry okay? huge as fuck bag of blackberry

[dragongirlsnout]

if i had a quantity of raspberries this large i would end up on the news

[dragon-in-a-fez]

never going to be over that time I was trying to explain polyamory to my mum, and she said "I just don't understand how someone could be in love with two people at once" and I gave her my the-cognitive-dissonance-is-causing-me-physical-pain face and she said "what??" and I very quietly said "mother....you had an affair...."

[storyweavingspider]

So I got outed as polyamorous to my mom by one of my partners when I was 18, and she turned to me and went “oh, whats polyamory?”

And lil me, panicked by Baby’s First Outing and wholly unprepared to answer this, responds with “it’s like what dad does but with consent”

She thought it was funny but I was mortified 😭

[clingyduoapologist]

Your friend’s unpublished fic idea is kind of a dead wife

[bebsi-cola]

when you tell people passports don't need to exist and people should be able to travel as they did throughout most of human history they think that's going too far because in their mind there exists a hoard of nameless faceless immigrants waiting to flood their country and "take over". without realising that there is nothing inherently superior about the imperial core countries - the culture, the food, the clothing, the architecture is not superior than that of the rest of the world. all you've got going for you are the benefits reaped from hundreds of years of historical colonisation and the continuing benefits of modern day imperialism. do you think if people's homes weren't subject to manufactured violence, artificial scarcity, and systematic disenfranchisement they'd all just wanna leave? can you not imagine a life where someone would be happier living in uganda than the usa?

[gummybearattacktheworldofdespair]

[therustyskull]

@ralfmaximus Showers that will kill you

[ralfmaximus]

Holy shit I thought this was a Sims bit or someone playing with CAD software, but the last few seconds knocked me out

[batbetbitbotbut]

@thebibliosphere I'm pretty sure you are the appropriate recipient for other people's terrifying home renovation choices

[drakenbaconinc]

How intelligent, I was worried he might be stupid

[thesailorseadog]

When I die, Defunctland will release a video on me that will showcase all my failures and at the root of it all will be Micheal Eisner

[blog-malo]

[gendercensus]

It's day 7, and there have now been over 20,000 responses to the Gender Census!

If you laugh in the face of the gender binary, please click here to take the survey. :)

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

how it feels to message a friend who's having Problems that you can't do anything to help with.

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

#i appreciate how genuine and non-judgemental this comic feels #like left one is not upset at right one for caring while being powerless #and right one seems genuinely distraught and not performative

I'm glad the facial expressions are coming across accurately! It can feel so absurd to say gosh I hope the torment maze removes some fire and rusty nails soon, but alas, sometimes that's all one can do.

[problematicghosty]

you’re allowed to be a boy btw. You’re allowed to be a girl. You’re allowed to be both or neither or something else entirely. You’re allowed.

[pyx]

victorian sterling silver seal peppers

[theragamuffininitiative]

tumblr users being generally knowledgeable about phishing attempts and scams and yet not hesitating to click various links from unknown users because they say such things as "spin the wheel to determine your alvin and the chipmunks band persona based on my favorite italian desserts" and we go "heck yeah."