Story I worked on a while back. Looking for feedback if anyone has anything to say. Thanks!
I put the car in park and stared at my watch a moment. It was still 10 minutes before I had to be inside for my appointment. I was plagued with heart palpitations and periods of dizziness, as well as an addiction to caffeine and late nights. My PCP suggested I cut back on the energy drinks and get some regular sleep, but in the same breath referred me to a cardiologist “just in case.” I humored him, figuring nothing would come of it, but when the cardiologist figured out I had a history of high blood pressure and was carrying around a bit more than a spare tire, she ordered all these extra tests. I was going to let it go until my wife found the referral in the car, so dammit, here we are. I had been wearing a 24 hour monitor for the last 10 days. Insurance wouldn’t spring for the new tech, so I was saddled with two wires hanging from my chest plugged into an event recorder the size of my last 4 cell phones combined. Last week was the treadmill stress test, sweated my ass off for 20 minutes for the tech to tell me they didn’t see anything too concerning, other than I was just shy of 300 pounds and my heart rate was high through the whole ordeal.
Today was the echocardiogram. I scheduled it later in the afternoon so I could get some stuff done at work and not blow the whole day when this takes longer than it should. I got out of the car and felt one of those goddammed dizzy spells as I stood up. I stood still a moment for it to pass, making sure to at least make it look like I was double checking the car door was locked, but in reality, was hanging onto to door frame in case I lost my balance. Once that passed, I walked across the parking lot and walked into the hospital. It was a single large building, if you wandered around enough and through the right doors, you could make your way from doctor’s offices to operating rooms, the ER, everything in between. It took a few minutes to orient myself and find the cardiology wing. That took more of my 10 remaining minutes than I thought, and I found myself walking fast to make it on time. I hate being late….
I managed to follow the right signs and found the outpatient testing area, checking my watch it read 4:02. I was greeted by a receptionist who took my information and made no matter of me being a few minutes behind. She confirmed my information; name, insurance, emergency contact, the usual stuff. Making small talk between loading computer screens. “Ok Mr. Baily, have a seat over there.” “Please, call me Mark.” As I stepped away to a chair. She and I were the only ones in the room. I assumed it would be busy, it was the end of the day, there’s always a late patient or a doctor who took a long lunch and put it all behind. I thumbed through a magazine a few minutes, occasionally looking at the receptionist for a clue as to how long I’d be waiting. She was on the phone, typing away, but not giving me any clue how long I’d be waiting. I found a copy of Newsweek and browsed through it half-heartedly. Finally, I heard a door open and 2 two techs wave me over, it was quarter to five. I looked around for the last patient to walk out or be at reception, but I didn’t see anyone. Odd I thought, that I hadn’t seen anyone else, but I was reading that magazine…
They took me into a dimly lit room with an exam bed and the echo equipment. Both female, the brunette took a quick set of vitals, height and weight on me, while the red head started turning on the machine. “I’m Abby, and over there is Lilly.” She said as she guided me over to the scale. “I’m training Lilly today, so she’s going to run the test, and I’m just here to guide her.” The scale beeped, 297 pounds was the reading. I scowled a little, and I think Abby noticed my displeasure. “You’re wearing all your clothes, we can take a couple of pounds off….and you’re about 5’11’’?” I nodded, even if she was being a little generous with her estimation. Even though we had no kids, I spent my 20’s sculpting an exquisite dad-bod, and at 33, it was probably time to do something about the spare tire and moobs.
Lilly turned to get Abby’s attention. “All set!” She walked over to me with an approving nod from Abby. “So Mr. Bai..”
“Please, Mark” I insisted. I hated being called mister, I wasn’t old enough for that.
“Ok, Mark. Undress above your waist and kick your boots off, and lay on the exam bed for us.” I did as I was asked and pulled the 24 hour monitor out of my pocket, the leads still attached to my chest.
“I got those.” Lilly reached out and pulled the two electrodes from my chest with more force than I would have. Abby giggled at my quiet yelp then apologized for Lilly’s eagerness.
“While we’re at it, go ahead and empty your pockets, just to make sure your comfortable.” Abby suggested and she helped gather my phone, keys and wallet, setting them on a table across the room. Lilly was busy gathering all the electrodes for the EKG as Abby guided me to the table, then lay bare chested on my back, arms behind my head. Lilly aptly placed the dozen or so electrodes on my torso, started the machine, and checked all was correct. Abby was watching her, but didn’t need to correct or guide Lilly, she was already and expert at this is seemed.
“Got a mint or something?” Lilly asked Abby as she finished setting me up. Abby produced a tin of mints tossed it over.
“Want one?” Lilly extended the tin out to me. I remembered the old advice, if someone offers you a mint, take it. I didn’t think I was rank, but it was the end of the day. I popped it in my mouth and let Lilly begin the test.
“Here we go.” Lilly brought the sonogram wand to my chest and I saw an image of my beating heart on the screen. The room was dim and the sound of the machine soothing. It had been a long day at work and I finally gave into the drowsy feeling and drifted off to sleep.
I awoke what seemed like hours later. Groggily looking around the room, I tried to blink my vision clear. It was still dim, and I could see the machine next to me whirring and beeping away. Yawning, I stretched my arms above my head and rolled on my side. Except I didn’t. I was disconnected from my body, my limbs not moving when I commanded them to. Able just to raise my head, I see my arms out stretched to my sides, and my chest still covered in electrodes. Taped to the center of my chest was a sonogram wand. Other than that, I can’t really see my body. I feel cool, especially my legs, almost like I was…naked?
“Lilly? Abby?” The sound that came out of my throat felt like a yell, but sounded like a whisper. I realize how dark the room is now, I’m pretty sure most of the light is coming from the black and white screen of the echo unit. I hear the beeping from it increase as I get more concerned about my situation. The lights suddenly flash on. I’m on a bed in the middle of a blue tiled room. A mirror on the ceiling confirms my suspicion, I’m laying on a bed uncovered and nude, save for the electrodes on my chest. My arms and legs held down by leather restraints, not that it mattered, I couldn’t move my limbs anyway. I take in my surroundings from what I can see in the mirror. IV stand, cart of equipment, monitor screens, and a table with surgical equipment on it. I’m in an operating room. I can see the IV running to my arm, surely, it’s pumping me full of a drug to keep me paralyzed.
“What the fuck…?” I whisper to myself. A door opens behind me, I hear footsteps coming toward me.
“Hey Mark.” It’s Lilly’s voice. “We finished your test, and the results were perfect!” I see her walk by my left side out of the corner of my eye. Her hand runs across my chest, down the side of my body and to my feet. I feel every inch of the touch. “You have just the most perfect heart our doctor has been looking for!” She’s bubbly, happy, it’s creepy how excited she is for my situation.
“I know you’re excited for this, but we still have to explain things to our patient.” That’s Abby. I hadn’t noticed her to this point.
“Okay okay okay, I’ll slow down…” I see Lilly walking around the room in the mirror. She’s circling me, looking at my body from head to toe. I wasn’t quite sure what she was admiring. To put things politely, if I ran into Lilly and Abby in a bar, they would be solidly out of my league. I was overweight, I could see where my jeans had been tight around my waist before they were removed. My skin pale and my chest and belly soft. The only saving grace about my physical appearance that I didn’t have chicken legs and there was nothing offensive about my face. And the room was cold. Ahem. Abby and Lilly on the other hand, could have found work as actresses playing the beautiful nurse on any soap opera.
Abby finally spoke up to offer an explanation. “I bet you’ve figured out this isn’t part of the test.” She leaned over me so I could see her brown hair and eyes. “We read your chart, and thought you might have the perfect heart of us to play with. We just needed to see your echo to make sure.”
“My heart? Perfect to play with? Why?”
“Well you’re still pretty young, so you’re at least a little attractive on the outside. That extra weight you’ve been carrying, your blood pressure, and your palpitations made us hope your heart was just the right amount of stressed for our doctor.” Doctor. That was the second time they had made a reference to a doctor. “When we saw your heart beating in real time, I knew it was right for Lilly to fully finish her training and show our Doctor what she can do.”
“So I’m a science experiment?”
“And so much more! I’m sure you’ve realized you can’t move, but you can still feel?” I nodded slowly. “And that you are still hooked up to a heart monitor? And that you’re in an operating room?”
Looking around, I continued to nod, and let out a weak and concerned “…yeah…”
“Lilly needs to learn how to really treat a heart, and you’re the lucky guy!” Lilly came into my field of vision wearing a mask and face shield, and holding a scalpel.
“Are we ready? Can I try it now?” Lilly’s excited. Too excited. Abby nods. Lilly lets out a squeal followed by a satisfied sigh.
“What’s going to happen to me?” I look at Abby with panic in my eyes. “Are you going to fuck around with my heart? Cut me open? Kill me?”
“Lilly is going to learn exactly how your heart works today. And if he learns enough, which I’m sure she will…” Abby shoots a confident glance at Lilly, “you will be just fine.”
Abby steps to my left side with the scalpel. “Let’s do it!”
I can still feel. I can feel everything. I can see lots of what is going on in the mirror and by turning my head. A cool sponge rubs iodine on the side of my chest. I feel the incision into my skin, it runs with the curve of my ribs. I moan in pain, but can’t move. Abby is watching my monitor while Lilly slices away. I feel my skin, fat, and muscle separate. It’s painful, my heart races. Abby moves so I can see the monitor and the sonogram of my heart. It’s been enhanced in artificial color, and in 4D. I can see my heart just like you can see a baby in an ultrasound. I can see the electrical signal from my heart on the EKG as well, the spikes getting closer and closer together. I feel sweat pour down my face and I hear the scalpel hit bone. “Christ!”
“Sorry!” Lilly chimes in.
“The fuck you are!” I manage to gasp out through the pain. I envision my arm smacking the bitch in the face, but it moves nowhere.
“Calm down Mark.” Abby brings her face in close to mine. Our noses touch, our lips press together.
“I’m married.” The words weakly come from my mouth.
“That’s part of the fun.” She kisses me, I don’t kiss back, but feel her lips and tongue against mine. What did I just hear? Rib spreader?
A sickening squish and pop come from my left torso as Lilly jams the device between my ribs and cranks it open. I smell blood. I feel my ribs breaking, my heart racing. A cool feeling enters the inside of my chest. It’s hard to breath. There is a pressure in my chest, my lungs are displaced by Lilly’s forearm entering me. The sound of her sliding her arm out of me fills the room with a strange schloop sound.
“I see it!” Lilly exclaims and Abby finally stops kissing me. I feel something fall down the back of my throat. I choke a try not to swallow it, but it goes down. A pill? Maybe two of them? I couldn’t tell. She looks in my eyes. “Have fun.”
Abby steps to my left side and looks into my torso with Lilly. I seem them smiling, giggling together. “Lilly you did a perfect job!” I can see blood on the ground in the mirror, and my body turning paler. There is no telling how much blood I’ve lost, but I’m alive, and conscious.
Lilly and Abby are euphoric. They take turns reaching inside me and feeling my beating heart. I can see their hands show up on the ultrasound. It’s surreal. Abby reaches in slowly and softly, taking my heart in her hand. I hear her counting the beats. They trade places and Lilly reaches in. She’s more excited, not as gentle. This is Lilly’s first time; I think Abby is a veteran. Lilly’s hand reaches my heart. I see two fingers appear over my heat on the monitor, directly on my left ventricle. “Press a little, see what happens.” Abby encourages her.
I feel a series of palpitations and become light headed. “Massage it like its…” I hear the monitor sound an alarm. Lilly’s two fingers are running over the point of my heart where the ventricles meet.
“See, you’re giving him PVCs doing that.” Abby looks proudly at her student. “Ok, now show me what comes next. And remember, you need to be very gentle.”
Lilly takes a deep breath. “Okay, I’m ready.”
“That’s great you’re ready, but what about me….” The pain of the incision had finally dulled, and I was in an almost dream like state from my heart throwing so many PVCs.
“Watch the screen and the heart monitor.” Abby tilts my head toward the screens. “We’re going to show you what a heart attack looks like.” Lilly’s fingers moved over one of my coronary arteries. She looks to the monitor to see where her hand is.
“Lilly, you have to do it by feel. The monitor is for me to check on you, and for Mark to watch as well.”
“Ok.” Her head lays on my chest and she concentrates and feels around my heart. “Got it!”
Abby checks the video screen. “Now gently push with one finger. I’ll tell you when to stop.” My left arm and jaw immediately became sore. A second later a sharp pain shot through my chest. I groaned as loudly as I could and the monitor sounded an alarm. I see her finger on my artery, the blood backing up behind it unable to continue through my heart muscle, and it collapsing from lack of lack of flow on the other side. I see my EKG show an unusual pattern. I think I hear Abby talk about ST elevation, but I don’t know what that means. My lungs can’t fill with air, and my vision tunnels. It last forever before I feel the pain subside and the sound of Lilly’s hand being removed from my torso.
“What the hell was that…” Breath returns to my lungs and I’m able to speak again.
“Lilly is a little heart stopper! Well, not quite, that’s coming in a little bit. But that was what a heart attack feels like. What did you think?” Abby runs her hand over my electrode covered chest and makes her way to my belly waiting for an answer.
“I think it hurt like hell! It didn’t feel good at all!”
“Are you sure?” She directs my eyes to the monitor. I don’t know what I’m looking at.
“Well you’re the professional, you tell me.”
“You’re heart rate is normal, you have a good pulse and rhythm. And…” I thought I felt her hand move lower than my waist, but I wasn’t sure. “…that’s not quite there but is coming along nicely.” I wasn’t sure what she was referring to but I had an idea.
Abby calls Lilly off to the other side of the room. They are having a conversation they don’t want me to hear. I can tell from their body language they are excited. Am I the first to make it this far? Maybe not for Abby but for Lilly? My heart was still exposed to the world. I could watch it beating on the video screen still. I’m not sure, but I’m convinced I can see a part of it not beating as strong as it was earlier. Maybe they damaged my heart when Lilly gave me the heart attack. And what is coming next?
Lilly and Abby make their way back to my bedside. For the first time, Lilly took interest in more than just my heart. She came in close to my face, her red hair brushing against my cheek. She places one of her blood covered hands on my chest. “We are going to do something so intimate now, I want you to be ready for it.”
“What are we going to do?”
“I’m going to hold your heart with both hands, and feel exactly how it beats. I’m going to know your heart so well, I’ll be able to simulate it beating with my hands. It’s probably going to feel funny though, I’m going to have to really get into your rhythm to do it right. Do you trust me to do what I need to do to get the rhythm right?” She looked in my eyes, and it was almost like she was asking for permission. We were going to cross a line that I don’t think she had crossed before with anyone else. I look for Abby, she’s not close, this is for Lilly and myself. I slowly nod and she kisses my forehead. “Thank you.”
Lilly takes position next to my torso. I look up at the mirror and see Abby is watching from the other side of the operating room. Lilly looks excited to do this, like an excited teenager on their first date. She looks at my face, then looks inside my chest at my heart and bites her lower lip. To my surprise, she removes her pants and panties. I turn towards her and make eye contact. “You want me to get into the rhythm, right?” She positions her naked bottom on the stool in a pleasing fashion and starts to learn my heart.
I feel her hands and arms entering my rib cage again, one at a time. I watch on the monitor and she caresses my heart with both hands. My chest feels full of pressure, there’s not a lot of room with both her arms in there. I hear the stool she is sitting on rocking and squeaking as she gyrates her hips. She moans, the stool rocks against the floor in sync with what her hands are doing in my chest. “I’m close….to knowing your heart.” I watch on the monitor as her hands go from moving over my heart to gently squeezing with each beat. Abby steps over and reassures me of what is happening.
“She’s learning how hard to push each chamber with her fingers. Her sexual stimulation helps commit your unique rhythm to memory. Are you feeling your heart skipping beats still?”
“Yeah…..a few just now, but less than at the beginning.”
“Lilly, you’re getting better. Keep it up.”
Soon, I can’t tell the difference between when her hands squeeze my heart or when it pumps on its own. The sound of her stool rocking, her wet lips sliding across the seat, the feeling of my heart beating, and the pattern of her fingers on my heart all sync up.
“Abby… have I done it? Have I learned his heart?” Abby inspected the screens, especially the ultrasound of Lilly’s fingers on my chambers. She formed a satisfied smile.
“You’re ready for us to try it.” Abby reaches for a syringe.
“Do it, I can keep his heart beating!” Lilly moans as she massages my heart and herself.
“What the hell is going on now?” Still paralyzed, but mesmerized by what is happening, I’m genuinely curious about what is going to happen next. Abby injects the contents of the syringe into my IV line.
“That is going to put your heart into ventricular fibrillation. Basically, we’re going to stop your heart. It’s Lilly’s job to keep blood pumping around your body.” My eyes grow wide.
“I’m going to die?”
“No, Lilly is going to be your heart.” Lilly, concentrating equally on her satisfaction and my heart, moans in sync with the beeping of the monitor. I notice the beeping on the monitor slow down, but her moaning and rhythmic massaging staying the same. “Look. You don’t have a heartbeat.”
I look at the monitor, it shows an erratic line where there should be my heart beat. I don’t know much, but I know that’s usually bad. I feel a little light headed and still paralyzed, but otherwise, I’m fine.
“You are just fine, as long as Lilly keeps massaging your heart like that.” Lilly moans loudly and climaxes, as she does, I feel my heart beat just a little quicker, then slower, then normalize to where she was before.
“This is great! Abby! I’m really doing it!” Lilly exclaims. “I’m having so much fun!”
Abby laughs with satisfaction. “Well if you’re having so much fun, it’s time for me to have my fun with our guest! And for christsake keep focused on his heart!”
Abby and Lilly’s mood was jovial, celebratory, and victorious. I had no idea how many times they tried this and it didn’t work, I’m sure I’m the first. What was the fun Abby was going to have? “Abby, what do you mean by fun?” Abby looks down between my legs, follow her gaze and I’m surprised at what I saw. I think to Abby’s kiss and what was slipped down my throat. “Did you slip me a, Viagra?”
“Yeah. This next part needs you to be hard, and I thought you might have a hard time getting an erection during this, so we gave you some help.”
“Jesus I’m married.”
“It’s a medical procedure, so it doesn’t count!” Lilly was enjoying this still, I’m pretty sure she is on her way to another orgasm. This wasn’t an operating room; this is their dungeon. “Goddamn, he’s a grower!” It was true, things weren’t that impressive till I was fired up. I tried to make it go away, but being that I still can’t move, I didn’t have much choice in what happened next, and I’m pretty sure I’m at their mercy if I want my heart to beat on its own again. Lilly kept massaging my heart keeping blood flowing around my body, as Abby explained what was going to happen next.
