you know when you think you're fine and have all these plans for yourself of things you should be able to do because you're doing fine? and then all of the sudden it hits you that all you've done is slept and ate and tried to drink water but you haven't gotten up. and you haven't done anything you meant to and you can't find the energy to shower and it dawns with dread that you actually aren't okay at all and you know there isn't much you can do about it? You know you handle it better than you used to and you know the fact that you've eaten and drank water can be enough if you let it be for now. Just the thing is, you thought you were okay and that you could do more and the reality is you can't and it's a cycle that you feel like has been continuous for your whole life? you know that feeling?
