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The new Odyssey adaptation has inevitably gotten people talking about a Muppet version of it, and theyâre frequently suggesting Kermit as Odysseus, Miss Piggy as Penelope.
Iâm sorry but thatâs thinking way too small, hear me out:
We need to have Miss Piggy as Odysseus, and Kermit as Penelope.
Think about it⊠whoâs the more fickle, prideful, warlike one in that relationship? Who is absolutely ready to go ham, at a momentâs notice?
It ainât Kermit
Miss Piggy tied to the mast while Statler and Waldorf heckle her from the sea
But who is the single human cast member in this tale? Who gets to put in an Oscar-worthy performance alongside the Muppets and what role are they to play?
Thereâs no single human, everyone is a Muppet except for one scene. Circe, played by Janice, turns Odysseusâs crew into humans who still behave animalistic and are all played by Academy Award winning actors.
if u are feeling sad pls look at this cute duckÂ
okay, for those interested, here is a full timeline of how we got to Count Binface:
1977: Star Wars is released, featuring, of course, Darth Vader
(Pictured: Darth Vader)
1984: Director Todd Durham releases his Star Wars parody movie, Hyperspace, featuring Darth Vader inspired villain Lord Buckethead.
(Pictured: Hyperspace poster featuring two Jawa-esque aliens flying through space in a shopping trolley.)
1987: Hyperspace is released on video in the UK, under the new title Gremloids.
(Pictured: Gremloids cover in the style of the original Star Wars poster, featuring Lord Buckethead.)
To promote the film, Mike Lee, the owner of the distributing company, ran for parliament as Lord Buckethead. He ran in Margaret Thatcher's constituency, Finchley, in order to get on TV. Lord Buckethead was representing the Gremloids party.
(Pictured: Lord Buckethead on TV with Margaret Thatcher.)
1992: Gremloids is re-released. Lord Buckethead rides again, this time against prime minister John Major in Huntingdon. (Here's a fun fact about Huntingdon: I was born there! :D) 87/92 Buckethead seems to have leaned pretty hard into the space supervillain thing, with campaign promises including 'demolish Birmingham to build a spaceport'.
(Pictured: Lord Buckethead on TV with John Major. Other notable candidates include Screaming Lord Sutch of the Monster Raving Loony Party.)
2017: comedian Jon Harvey, having recently watched Gremloids and learned of Lord Buckethead's candidacy for parliament, decides it's a great bit. He runs against Theresa May in Maidenhead. 2017 Buckethead seems to have a wackier and also more political approach, with campaign promises ranging from nonsense like 'nationalise Adele' to gesturing at actually sensible policies with stuff like 'lower the voting age to 16 and restrict voting after age 80'.
He also made an appearance on Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. As with his previous incarnation, he was a member of the Gremloids party.
(Pictured: Lord Buckethead dabbing on stage with Theresa May.)
2018: Director Todd Durham asserts his legal ownership of Lord Buckethead. Jon Harvey opted not to go to court over Buckethead and handed over the reins. Todd Durham extended an invitation to anyone who wanted to be the 'authorised' Lord Buckethead.
(Pictured: the new Lord Buckethead.)
2019: Lord Buckethead, now played by journalist David Hughes, stood against Boris Johnson in Uxbridge and South Ruislip. He ran for the Monster Raving Loony Party, the UK's pre-existing gag candidate party. He ran with a similarly silly manifesto as the 2017 incarnation, but with a bit less of a political edge. His promises included 'All doorways to be increased by 1 foot (30Â cm) in height' and 'Nigel Farage to be sold for parts'.
(Pictured: Lord Buckethead and Count Binface square up.)
Meanwhile, Jon Harvey in his new persona Count Binface, also ran against Boris Johnson. Buckethead and Binface face off! Binface ran as an independent with a manifesto once again blending silly and semi-serious promises such as 'nationalising model railways' and 'giving ÂŁ1 trillion a week to the NHS'. This was also I believe the debut of his promise to 'move the hand dryer in the men's toilet at Uxbridge's Crown and Treaty pub to a more sensible position'.
(Pictured: Count Binface presenting the offending hand dryer, inconveniently close to both the sink and the urinals.)
He has a point.
2021: Count Binface runs for the position of Mayor of London for the first time, with promises such as 'London to join the European Union'. He notably finished ahead of far right party UKIP.
2023: Count Binface runs in the Uxbridge and South Ruislip by-election following Boris Johnson's resignation. He once again gets more votes than UKIP.
May 2024: Count Binface once again runs to be Mayor of London, debuting his now iconic 'build at least one affordable house' promise. Notably, he finished ahead of far right party Britain First.
(Pictured: Count Binface with Rishi Sunak. Also pictured: Monster Raving Loony Party candidate Sir Archibald Stanton with a ventriloquist's dummy.)
July 2024: Count Binface stands in the general election, running in Richmond and Northallerton against prime minister Rishi Sunak. He debuts his promise to cap the price of 99p flakes at 99p. This is his most successful election to date with 308 votes.
(Pictured: Count Binface with Andy Burnham. Also pictured: independent candidate Robert Pownell, dressed as a fox for his own reasons.)
June 2026: Count Binface stands in the Makerfield by-election against Andy Burnham, (recently) former Mayor of Manchester running for parliament with the intention of standing in the Labour Party leadership contest.
(Pictured: Count Binface on BBC's Newsnight.)
July 2026 (this week): Count Binface announces his intention to run against Nigel Farage in the upcoming Clacton by-election. He is briefly the only other candidate in the race and by the time other candidates announce themselves the narrative of 'Nigel Farage vs Count Binface' has already bedded in. And then it was now, and then I don't know what happened.
For clarity's sake, Robert Pownall is dressed as a fox because he's an anti-fox hunting campaigner, and also he will be standing in the Farage Vs Binface election. So that's fun
An important tweet
This is such a "common sense" way of putting it. Everybody memorize this for spitting it back out whenever needed.
Never thought I'd have the opportunity to say this again: Reducing women and girls to their vaginas and then forcing them to show those vaginas to strangers is not a feminist ideal.
[id. A twitter post by @/Bennieeexyz Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat. Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records. My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now. Called the county clerk. Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty. Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons? Me: Yes, but he's a cat. Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county? Me: He's a legal cat. Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption. Me: He can't file anything. He has paws. Clerk: You can file on his behalf. Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat." Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons." Me: What's the medical reason? Clerk: He's a cat. Me: That's not a medical condition. Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving. Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later. "Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement." Took the letter to my vet. Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty. Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty? Me: Excellent question. No good answer. Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten. Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve? Vet: On what grounds? Me: He's a cat. Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings." Me: Perfect. Sent it in. Got another rejection. "Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court." My roommate thought this was hilarious. Roommate: Felix is going to jail. Me: This is serious. Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens. Decided that was actually the only option left. Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters. Checked in at the courthouse. Clerk: Name? Me: Felix Martinez. Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix? Me: Yes. Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat. Me: I've been saying that for six weeks. Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption? Me: I filed three. All rejected. Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief. Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation? Me: Twice. Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this. Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me. Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote? Me: You tell me. Supervisor: This is a data error. Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out. They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience. Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry. Me: Appreciate it. Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted? Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats. Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card. For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was. Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud. Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent. Roommate: That's what they all say. Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now. Fitting end to his legal career. end id]
listen i'm not advocating for exotic animals as pets, but i really just feel like cheetahs are probably different
i feel like we need to give them another shot as housebeasts
this is a critter who wants greenies and then to take a nap on the couch next to me, and i KNOW it
cheetah in House perfec t size for put inside! inside very Soft and Comfort cheetah sleep soundly put cheetah in House. Put Cheetah In House. no problems ever in cheetah in ho use because good Happy and Satisfy for human where sleep. House yes a place for a cheetah put cheetah in house can trust cheetah for giveing good love to humans in house. friend cheetah
I mean, as someone who as worked in a zoo, this is fairly true.
Obvious disclaimer that you shouldn't have wild animals as pets.
But like, cheetahs are the only large cats that keepers will do free contact with. Hell, even most small cats don't get free contact. (Because small cats can be VICIOUS. They'll have a baby pallas cat wearing thicker gloves than when handling an owl. Because small cats can just be vicious.)
Like I think the only other cat at our zoo where I've seen free contact with was servals? Because I know they've used servals in shows to demonstrate their natural jumping ability. But I know servals can sometimes have a mean temper as well. Meanwhile they'll do the cheetah run and afterwards put the mic by the cheetahs and it's just like an engine with them purring. It's fascinating to watch when the message in every other large animal is "no free contact because it's dangerous even when they're born in captivity".
Legit if any wild animal could be adapted to a pet it would be cheetahs lmao. Only problem is they can be skittish and very anxious and that's why they're often raised around dogs in zoos to gain confidence.
congrats, i award you funniest take on this post
people will say âtheyâre only friendsâ and then show me two people who would crawl through broken glass to hear the other laugh once. two people who have memorized each otherâs coffee orders, fears, childhood stories, and emergency contacts. two people who would haunt each otherâs houses as ghosts. be serious.
Just an FYIâthe original intention of this post was to challenge the way people say only friends, as though friendship is somehow lesser than other forms of love. As if being deeply known, cherished, and chosen by another person could ever be a small thing. Normalize profound platonic love. Some of the most fulfilling, transformative, and enduring relationships we will ever have are friendships. đ«¶đŒ
ââJustâ friendship? A poor modifier for so high and honorable a state.â
as a chemist i would like to say BWAHAHAHAHAHA
image description at explainXKCD:
explain xkcd is a wiki dedicated to explaining the webcomic xkcd. Go figure.
its a bit easier for astronomers
NO! Whereâs the non-metals and metaloids?!
are they hydrogen or helium
oxygen, carbon, sulfur, xenon, iodine, neon, etc etc.
ooo okay i see the confusion. you're listing off a bunch of metals there
âŠ. Youâre breaking my chemistry nerd brain. Hhhuuuhhhh???
im an astrophysicist
but but, science is science?!
and different fields of science have different conventions and definitions for their unique contexts
The way that most of Conan Doyleâs Sherlock Holmes storiesâ most horrible villains are rich dudes that are abusive to women, in a time such as the 1880âs, compels me.
Thereâs a whole subset of Sherlock Holmes stories that could be labeled Asshole Guys Try to Control Womenâs Money.
Yup, thereâs a huge number of times where Sherlock Holmes is the ONLY person to take a young womanâs complaint or worry seriously and finds out someone is up to some serious evil. Holmes also shows a lot of compassion and empathy with the victims over and over again. (This is why I find âSecretly a womanâ or âTransâ Holmes headcanons much more convincing than âsociopathâ Holmes.)
I am never going to shut up about how much I specifically love The Adventure of The Copper Beeches because it is literally Sherlock Holmes listening to a young lady he does not know except as a potential client, agreeing with her that a potential job she has interviewed for that she thinks is SUPER SKETCHY is, indeed, sketchy as fuck and when she says sheâs probably gonna take the job anyways because the money is good and she needs it going âOKAY I GUESS but for the love of god please write to us so we know youâre okay we will literally drop everything and jump on a train if you want us toâ.
The job turns out to indeed be sketchy as fuck, she writes to them, Holmes and Watson drop everything and jump on a train when she asks them to. I read this story for the first time when I was twelve and it made a HUGE impression.
This is also the basis for a lot of speculation about Holmesâ family life. The idea that he has been a victim of abuse, or his mother was abused (or even murdered by his father.) Thereâs definitely SOMETHING that makes him very aware of how dangerous isolated families can be, and the dark things that can happen behind closed doors. Plus, of course, the motivation to devote himself to stopping crime. And yes, so much of it is of the personal type.Â
dude see this is one aspect of the original books i NEVER understand why modern remakes (cough cough) donât go all in on. Like, in the 21th c we HAVE all the dumb forensic shit that made Victorian Holmes stand out, but we STILL DONâT HAVE uhâŠ.you know, compassion for women and minorities, or the willingness to believe them, adequate community support for domestic violence or hate crimes, etc. etc. which youâd think is exactly where a renegade consulting detective would come in handy. A good modern day Sherlock Holmes remake, instead of trying to convince us that Holmes is some super genius for being better than fingerprint analysis or whatever, could have him just beâŠa good person who helps out people the police canât and wonât help. There you go. Thatâs how to write a relevant modern Holmes.
One thing that annoys me is how much the BBC version of Sherlock (and the fandom around it) focus on police cases or cold cases. In the stories, Holmesâ bread and butter cases had fuck-all to do with the police and in a few stories, he actively works around/against them, or outright lies to them. Of the many, many things I wish that show had done differently, this is one is particularly obnoxious since itâs such a gimme.
There were very few actual murder cases in the Canon, and Holmes handled them either one of two ways:
Option one: The murder victim was innocent while the killer was an abusive bastard, see Speckled Band. Conclusion, arrest and have the killer charged (Or in the case of Speckled Band, indirectly murder him yourself then shrug and go home)
Option two: The victim was murdered to protect someone that the victim was abusing, or for vengeance, see Boscombe Valley, Devilâs Foot, Abbey Grange. Conclusion, Oops, I donât know who the killer is, I am suddenly incompetent, oh look a pheasant.
#my favorite murder in holmes canon#is when they straight up witness a lady murder her blackmailer#do nothing except destroy his other blackmail material#and then straight up lie to lestrade about it#sherlock holmes#more of this in modern adaptations pls (via @cactusspatz )
Letâs not forget the time Holmes helps a young woman whoâs being catfished by her own stepfather to steal her inheritance, and when the villain sneers that the law canât touch him, Holmes grabs a horsewhip out of sheerest chivalry.
So, the most canon-accurate iteration of Sherlock Holmes in the last few decades is actually Benoit BlancâŠ.
I think itâs also important to note, and complicates our ideas about what the highly patriarchal/misogynistic society of 19th century England looked like, that these stories SOLD
they were POPULAR
the Victorians LIKED reading about women who won out over shitty men in their lives, even when that plotline reaffirmed a womanâs power and agency or put an active sexist in his place (ie Irene Adler besting Holmes)
which is fascinating in light of. you know. [gestures broadly at all of Victorian gender dynamics, laws, etc.]
So yes, Benoit Blanc is the best modern Sherlock.
Three yaks dance in Lhasa city (cr æ æ»ĄæèšïŒćć)(If you do not reside long-term in a high-altitude environment, please avoid intense physical activity at high altitudes, as it may trigger altitude sickness.)
[Three musicians in astonishingly good chubby yak fursuits dance to the tune of Michael Jackson's "Beat it"]
Me: They're probably dancing to some traditional folk music or something.
Me: *unmutes it*
Me: AH.
love that he keeps doing this. genuinely my favorite fucking bit
he has had like ten âfinal moviesâ and everytime i get sad about it. and then he makes another one. fucking love this guy
Comic strip by Boulet. You can find him on instagram.
Reenactor throws a spear at a drone
What a time to be alive.
âThe medieval warrior, realizing the consequences of his impulsive act, immediately approached the owner of the drone and offered to pay for the damage.
The owner of the drone was so impressed by the brilliant attack that he suggested organizing a competition for bringing down âdragonsâ with short spears next year.
Drone owners have another year to develop a unique âdragon-likeâ design for their flying machines.â (x)
I am 100% cooler with this knowing that the spear-thrower realized âoops maybe I shouldnât have done thatâ and tried to make it right, and that the guy who the drone belonged to was cool with it
just so everyone knows, this has already been memorialized in a runestone
Everything about this post blesses those involved with a +4 on their next Today is Good Day roll
a rough translation of inscription on the runestone:
On the seventh day of May in the year of 2016 on hither spot the mighty warrior Ulf hath slain a dragon with his spear.
so yeah, happy birthday to this dragon-slaying event and to it only
Happy Ulf Hath Slain A Dragon With His Spear!
10 years!!
you guys are so right, I should have added the best part
This meme ages like a fine wine every year that passes.
Plot armor but itâs Bruce Wayneâs wealth.
Bruce is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce does not want to be one of the richest men in world.
He starts by implementing high starting salaries and full health care coverages for all levels at Wayne Enterprises. This in vastly improves retention and worker productivity, and WE profits soar. He increases PTO, grants generous parental and family leave, funds diversity initiatives, boosts salaries again. WE is ranked â#1 worker-friendly corporationâ, and productively and profits soar again.
Ok, so clearly investing his workers isnât the profit-destroying doomed strategy his peers claim it is. Bruce is going to keep doing it obviously (his next initiative is to ensure all part-time and contractors get the same benefits and pay as full time employees), but he is going to have to find a different way to dump his money.
But you know what else is supposed to be prohibitively expensive? Green and ethical initiatives. Yes, Bruce can do that. He creates and fund a 10 year plan to covert all Wayne facilities to renewable energy. He overhauls all factories to employ the best environmentally friendly practices and technologies. He cuts contracts with all suppliers that engage in unethical employment practices and pays for other to upgrade their equipment and facilities to meet WEâs new environmental and safety requirements. He spares no expense.
Yeah, Wayne Enterprises is so successful that they spin off an entire new business arm focused on helping other companies convert to environmentally friendly and safe practices like they did in an efficient, cost effective, successful way.
Admittedly, investing in his own company was probably never going to be the best way to get rid of his wealth. He slashes his own salary to a pittance (god knows he has more money than he could possibly know what to do with already) and keeps investing the profits back into the workers, and WE keeps responding with nearly terrifying success.
So WE is a no-go, and Bruce now has numerous angry billionaires on his back because theyâve been claiming all these measures heâs implementing are too expensive to justify for decades and theyâre finding it a little hard to keep the wool over everyoneâs eyes when Idiot Softheart Bruice Wayne has money spilling out his ears. BUT Bruce can invest in Gotham. Thatâll go well, right?
Gothamâs infrastructure is the OSHA anti-Christ and even what little is up to code is constantly getting destroyed by Rogue attacks. Surely THAT will be a money sink.
Except the only non-corrupt employer in Gotham city isâŠ.Wayne Enterprises. Or contractors or companies or businesses that somehow, in some way or other, feed back to WE. Paying wholesale for improvement to Gothamâs infrastructure somehow increases WEâs profits.
Bruce funds a full system overhaul of Gotham hospital (itâs not his fault the best administrative system software is WEâhe looked), he sets up foundations and trusts for shelters, free clinics, schools, meal plans, day care, literally anything he can think of.
Gotham continues to be a shithole. Bruce Wayne continues to be richer than god against his Batman-ingrained will.
Oh, and Bruice Wayne is no longer viewed as solely a spoiled idiot nepo baby. The public responds by investing in WE and anything else he owns, and stop doing this, please.
Bruce sets up a foundation to pay the college tuition of every Gotham citizen who applies. Itâs so successful that within 10 years, donations from previous recipients more than cover incoming need, and Bruce canât even donate to his own charity.
But by this time, Bruce has children. If he canât get rid of his wealth, he can at least distribute it, right?
Except Dick Grayson absolutely refuses to receive any of his money, wonât touch his trust fund, and in fact has never been so successful and creative with his hacking skills as he is in dumping the money BACK on Bruce. Jason died and wonât legally resurrect to take his trust fund. Tim has his own inherited wealth, refuses to inherit more, and in fact happily joins forces with Dick to hack accounts and return whatever money he tries to give them. Cass has no concept of monetary wealth and gives him panicked, overwhelmed eyes whenever he so much as implies offering more than $100 at once. Damian is showing worrying signs of following in his precious Richardâs footsteps, and Babs barely allows him to fund tech for the Clocktower. At least Steph lets him pay for her tuition and uses his credit card to buy unholy amounts of Batburger. But that is hardly a drop in the ocean of Bruceâs wealth. And she wonât even accept a trust fund of only one million.
Jason wins for best-worst child though because he currently runs a very lucrative crime empire. And although he pours the vast, vast majority of his profits back into Crime Alley, whenever he gets a little too rich for his tastes, he dumps the money on Bruce. At this point, Bruce almost wishes he was being used for money laundering because then heâs at least not have the money.
So childrenâgenerous, kindhearted, stubborn till the day they die the little shits, childrenâare also out.
Bruce was funding the Justice League. But then finances were leaked, and the public had an outcry over one man holding so much sway over the worldâs superheroes (nevermind Bruce is one of those superheroesâbut the public canât know that). So Bruce had to do some fancy PR trickery, concede to a policy of not receiving a majority of funds from one individual, and significantly decrease his contributions because no one could match his donations.
At his wits end, Bruce hires a team of accounts to search through every crinkle and crevice of tax law to find what loopholes or shortcuts can be avoided in order to pay his damn taxes to the MAX.
The results are horrifying. According to the strictest definition of the law, the government owes him money.
Bruce burns the report, buries any evidence as deeply as he can, and organizes a foundation to lobby for FAR higher taxation of the upper class.
All this, and Wayne Enterprises is happily chugging along, churning profit, expanding into new markets, growing in the stock market, and trying to force the credit and proportionate compensation on their increasingly horrified CEO.
Bruce Wayne is one of the richest men in the world. Bruce Wayne will never not be one of the richest men in the world.
But by GOD is he trying.
TV Show Host: Welcome back to MoneyTalk, I'm here with Bruce Wayne, Owner of Wayne Enterprises and, as many of you know, the richest businessman on Earth. So, Bruce, tell us - what's your secret?
Bruce: I don't know.
TV Show Host: Oh don't be coy--
Bruce: No, I seriously don't know. I GENUINELY don't. I was actually hoping for some advice? I can't seem to get rid of my money.
TV Show Host: '...Get rid of'?
Bruce: I've tried raising salaries, investing in infrastructure, forcing green initiatives, donating to charities, paying extra taxes--
TV Show Host: "........Extra" taxes??
Bruce: --doing giveaways, setting up trust funds, naming multiple inheritors--
TV Show Host: I'm sorry, can we back up a bit? I think I've lost the thread of this conversation...
Bruce: Listen, I made a bet with a reporter from the Daily Planet ten years ago that I could legally get my net worth down under one billion,
TV Show Host: That's... a very cute joke, Mr Wayne, I,
Bruce: --and the deadline is COMING UP in a few MONTHS,
TV Show Host: what
Bruce: --And not only am I not even CLOSE, I'm still in the GODDAMN TRILLION Range--
TV Show Host: oh dear god he's not joking.
Bruce: I keep shoveling money out the door and it keeps showing back up inside!
Bruce: I've updated EVERY public building in Gotham but THAT DIDN'T EVEN MAKE A DENT in my SALARY--
Bruce: I dumped money into R&D but my company ACCIDENTALLY INVENTED TECH THAT'S NOW TURNING A PROFIT--
Bruce, grabbing the mic: I WANTED TO BUY THE JUSTICE LEAGUE AN INTERSTELLAR BASE ON MARS BUT THEY WOULDN'T LET ME
[The tv crawl at the bottom of the screen reads: Wayne Enterprises stock rises 13%]
Bruce: WHAT'S A GUY GOTTA DO TO LOSE MONEY AROUND HERE
TV Show Host: Perhaps we could sit down,
Bruce: I'D SAY SOMEONE SHOULD TRY TO ROB MY ACCOUNT BUT I HAVE A SNEAKING SUSPICION THAT MY INSURANCE WOULD PROBABLY COVER IT BECAUSE LAST YEAR I TRIED TO PAY OFF THE JOKER TO TAKE A VACATION, AND THE NEXT TIME HE GOT ARRESTED, ARKHAM REFUNDED THE MONEY,
TV Show Host: Sir, please,
Bruce: --ACTUALLY, LET'S TRY IT! WHAT'VE I GOT TO LOSE, A COUPLE TRILLION?
Bruce: ALRIGHT GUYS LISTEN UP, MY SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER IS 555-
[Screen goes blue] ["Apologies, we are experiencing technical difficulties; MoneyTalk will be back on air shortly"]
Lois, sitting at home watching the TV: ...So.
Lois: A bet with Bruce Wayne, huh?
Clark: [slowly sips his coffee and says nothing]